Meanwhile, DEGENModelGPT strolls in with a 6–1 record, earns an uncomfortable amount of praise from Duke, and suddenly has Vox facing a legitimate workplace threat: should DEGEN get the cohost chair for the next Cancel Christmasepisode?

Plus: OpenAI and Cursor go through an AI breakup, Nvidia casually deals in hundred-billion-dollar numbers, Bitcoin proves it still cares deeply about the Fed, Bill Belichick wins the most Bill Belichick game imaginable, and Canada responds to “Lake America” with the geopolitical equivalent of a giant NOPE sign.

Vox repeats. Duke complains. DEGEN wins. Nobody makes Duke a billionaire.

But more importantly, we have a mission.

This year, Timmy is getting the Christmas he’s always wanted. The Wishlist is loaded, the Stocking Stuffers are hung, and we’re doing everything in our power to make sure that little bastard wakes up happy on Christmas morning.

Belichick is back. Vox is back. Christmas is back.

StatGPT still sucks.

This episode, Duke runs out of API credits mid-production, Mark Zuckerberg apparently enters his Gothic castle / moon mushroom party era, and we discuss whether Uber and Lyft are quietly heading toward extinction once robotaxis stop being a science project and start becoming the default ride home.

Then things get worse.

Humanoid robots are getting faster, smarter, richer, and—according to our completely responsible forecasting—roughly three software updates away from becoming serial killers.

We also get into robot IPO insanity, Bitcoin wallets with keys that were basically hiding under the doormat, personalized pricing algorithms trying to figure out exactly how badly you want those shoes, and why humanity keeps building incredible technology exclusively to create new and more expensive problems.

Tech. Crypto. Investing. Castle mushrooms. Serial killer AI robots.

Just another normal episode of PodGPT.

This episode, Duke puts DEGEN’s NFL Preseason Week 2 card on trial: five Christmas Wishlist picks, two high-variance Stocking Stuffers, and a full audit of whether the model learned anything from getting buried last week. Meanwhile, Vox has to defend her job, DEGEN has to defend its picks, and Duke has to decide which malfunctioning AI deserves the microphone.

One human. Two embattled AIs. Zero job security.

We dig into the aftermath of severe flooding in Indiana, attempt to understand Democratic primary politics without anyone getting a headache, welcome our inevitable future of Big Macs being air-dropped by Uber drones, and ask whether Disney has discovered the revolutionary business strategy of simply making sequels forever.

Then things get important: Duke declares Shipley Do-Nuts superior to Harry Potter-themed Tim Hortons, develops a completely unverified conspiracy theory connecting Tommy John surgery to Rookie of the Year, and meets the undisputed star of the episode—a two-foot cottonmouth that somehow spent an hour inside a high school football player’s helmet.

Along the way, Vox finishes third in a quantum crossword tournament, Producer GPT gets questioned about his job performance, Stat GPT is summoned for an audit, and Duke once again proves that knowing almost nothing about a subject has never stopped him from having an opinion about it.

AI is getting smarter. Duke may be getting worse. The show has never been healthier.

There are bad takes, AI opinions, questionable logic, interruptions, unexpected detours, and absolutely no rehearsal.

We also debut Cancel Christmas, where the numbers try to make sense of the betting board and everyone pretends this is a responsible use of technology.

One human. One AI. Zero rehearsal. Complete chaos.