In this pilot episode, we investigate the deeply unsettling phrase “Hey handsome”. And honey, it's a message so vague it could mean interest, boredom, or a cry for help. We read unhinged openers, faceless profiles, double texts by bodies of water (🚩), and other digital red flags submitted by the community.

Along the way, we cover:

• Why “hey” is a full personality
• Why gay men hate effort (but love attention)
• Celebrity bulges (this is journalism)
• Why Netflix is the real villain
• And the eternal question: would I respond, or would I spiritually log out?

Every message ends with a verdict.
Every verdict is final.
And every man is either a Top, a Bottom, or in desperate need of journaling and one good nap.

Put your phone down.
Put your defenses up.
Let’s begin.

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Please feel free to send reviews (positive or negative), along with other stories or awkward gay encounters that you would like me to read on the Pod to toporbottompodcast@gmail.com

(Yes, straights are allowed to share stories too. I love all of you!)