In this episode, we discuss the chapter Toxic Optimism. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.


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In this episode, we discuss the chapter False Alarms. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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In this episode, we discuss the chapter Healthy Withdrawal, aka Practicing Solitude. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.


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Source

[1] Fileta, D. (2023). Reset. Harvest House Publishers.

Are you struggling to find meaning and fulfillment in life?
Feeling empty despite chasing success? In this episode, we explore the Biblical concept of living an abundant life. Learn how to find true meaning and fulfillment while facing mental health challenges.

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Episode Description

Are you struggling to say “no” and constantly find yourself overcommitting? In this video, we explore the 7 psychological and emotional reasons behind why you keep saying “yes,” even when it impacts your mental health and well-being. From the desire for approval to the fear of rejection, we dive deep into the internal motivators that lead to burnout and stress. Learn how to set healthy boundaries, honor your own needs, and break free from the cycle of overcommitting.

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Episode Description

Are you feeling overwhelmed by distractions in your life? In this episode, we explore the concept of ‘Concentrate and Eliminate,’ inspired by Anne Ortlund’s teachings. Learn how to simplify your life by focusing on your core priorities—faith, family, and purpose—and eliminating distractions that hold you back from living a meaningful and purposeful life in Christ.

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Episode Description

Ever feel like your calendar is bursting at the seams? You might be caught in “The Yes Trap”! In this eye-opening video, we're diving into the 6 surprising reasons you keep saying “yes” when your mind, body, and schedule are screaming “no.”

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In this episode, we're exploring the epidemic of distraction. We’ll highlight the importance of focus and how it can be used as a catalyst for change. We’ll break down four strategies for mastering focus.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we're exploring how to unlock deeper connections with others. We'll dive into the fascinating world of attachment theory and how it impacts our relationships - not just with other people but with God as well. We'll explore different attachment styles, how they develop, and most importantly, how understanding them can help us forge deeper, more meaningful connections.

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Episode Description

7 Hidden Obstacles Sabotaging Your Growth: In this video, we break down the 7 hidden enemies that might sabotage your progress. Learn how to identify these obstacles in your daily life and develop strategies to overcome them. This is part of a study inspired by Reset—Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

From Panic to Peace - discover the power of breathing and mindfulness in managing stress and anxiety from a Biblical perspective. Learn how God's design for our bodies can help us find peace and calm in troubled times. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Source

[1] Fileta, D. (2023). Reset. Harvest House Publishers.

Episode Description

The 8-8-8 Rule: In this episode, we discuss how to use the 888 Rule as a blueprint for a healthy life. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Source

[1] Fileta, D. (2023). Reset. Harvest House Publishers.

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Healthy Withdrawal aka Practicing Solitude. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Source

[1] Fileta, D. (2023). Reset. Harvest House Publishers.

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Living Full to Fully Live. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Work It Out. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Feelings in My Body. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Triggers Are Everywhere. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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In this episode, we discuss Embracing Concern and Rejecting Worry. This is part of a study inspired by Louie Giglio's Winning the War on Worry. Each week, we take concepts from Winning the War on Worry and apply them to brain health.

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EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Stop Before You Start - Pause. 

This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your 

Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings and Change Your Life by Debra 

Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain

 health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter False Alarms. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Necessary Interruptions. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Feel Free to Feel. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Pressure Release. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :) https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354 

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Pressure Check. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Toxic Optimism. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Like a Child. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter We Go Way Back. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Choosing a Side. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Leave A Review

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https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Call Out the Lies. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Leave A Review

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https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter There It Is Again. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Leave A Review

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https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter What's On Replay. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Default Mode. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter It's Not a One-Player Game. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Plan It Out. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Leave A Review

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Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter The Deep End. This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

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Leave A Review

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EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Why Now? This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

CONNECT

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LEAVE A REVIEW

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EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Own Your Junk.

This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your

Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra

Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain

health.

CONNECT

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter https://overflow.community/newsletter/

💼 Connect on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/craigbooker/

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LEAVE A REVIEW

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Stop Before You Start - Pause.

This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your

Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra

Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain

health.

CONNECT

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter https://overflow.community/newsletter/

💼 Connect on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/craigbooker/

📷 Connect on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/craigbooker/

LEAVE A REVIEW

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Stop Before You Start - Pause.

This is part of a study inspired by Reset - Powerful Habits to Own Your

Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life by Debra

Fileta. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain

health.

Source:

[1] Fileta, D. (2023). Reset. Harvest House Publishers.

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Featured Resource or Podcast

Been There, Learned That with Dana Byers

http://danabyerscoaching.com/

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It’s a new year, and with it comes a new beginning for many seeking change in some area of their lives. This change could be a desire to get out of debt, lose a few extra pounds, or improve physical fitness. Whatever that may be, take a few minutes to reflect and write those things down. Put it in your journal or maybe a note on your phone.

Maybe you want to make changes that will improve your brain health. You want to replace negative thinking with positive. You want to work on relationships or build a community of people around you. Perhaps it is time to let another person in on your struggles. The new year might be a time to work towards the career you have always dreamed of.

We all have areas of our lives that we want to improve. The problem, according to Debra Fileta, is that we go about this change all wrong. We may start getting up early each morning, going to the gym, or seeing a counselor. All of these are good places to start, but within a few weeks, we find ourselves slipping back into our old ways.

In the first chapter of Reset, Debra Fileta encourages readers to consider the apostle Paul. In Romans 7:15 NKJV, Paul says, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” We are creatures of habit, which often means we return to old, unhealthy ways of living.

Debra says that if we look at this verse, we see a key phrase, “I do not understand what I do.” Woh! Paul, the author of a good part of the New Testament, makes a bold confession. He doesn’t understand his own ways. I’m not sure about you, but I relate to Paul’s statement a LOT! Many times, I simply do not understand my own ways.

Why does this matter?

Debra says, “…when we don't understand why we do what we do, well find ourselves doing the same things again and again. Understanding why we do what we do, learning to dig a little deeper, is paramount to changing our behavior. There's no way around it.” That’s huge! A big lesson here is that it is important for us to understand why we do what we do.

Debra goes on to say, “…the people who end up having the most success in their attempts to change and grow are the ones who have an awareness of what’s going on deep down inside, underneath the surface.” Breaking free from old, unhealthy habits starts with understanding our behaviors and the patterns we continue going back to.

In chapter one, Debra tells a funny story about a car she owned years ago in college. The car had several problems, and when Debra took it to the mechanic, she found out it wasn’t a lemon as she had assumed. A few months before, a friend of Debra’s had installed her car stereo. The friend had mistakingly crossed some wires in the process of installing a stereo, which led to a host of other issues.

Maybe you can relate to this story of Debra’s. You keep trying to change something in your life, but you find yourself going back to those unhealthy patterns. Sometimes, it can feel like there is something seriously wrong with you. Have you ever stopped to consider whether you have some wires crossed underneath the surface? The truth is there are times when we develop unhealthy or untrue beliefs about ourselves, the world, or others.

Thought -> Feels -> Behaviors

About halfway through the first chapter, Debra drops a huge, life-changing truth. Our thoughts lead to feelings, which lead to behaviors. If you have ever done any gardening, you know that to get rid of a weed, you need to pull out the roots and all. If you fail to do so, the weed will pop right back up again.

This same principle applies to human behavior. If we fail to get to the root of what we are trying to change, we will find ourselves returning to the same old, unhealthy patterns. Debra says, “What's happening in your mind is so key to the process of transformation and change, and knowledge of it

In this episode, we discuss the chapter titled There Is Always Hope.

This is part of a study inspired by Seen – Healing Despair and Anxiety in Kids and Teens Through the Power of Connection by Will Hutcherson & Chinwé Williams, P.H.D. We take concepts from the book each week and apply them to brain health.

Will opens with a story about Hannah.

Will had just finished speaking to 900 students at a middle school assembly. A boy named John approached Will, asking him if he would speak with his friend Hannah. Hannah was feeling down dealing with insecurities. In his conversation with Hannah, Will assured her that she would not always feel this way. He allowed Hannah to emotionally exhale by sharing the hurt feelings she was experiencing. Will encouraged Hannah by telling her that she has a purpose.

Using a few connection tools, Will spoke life into Hannah.

Will acknowledged that his interaction with Hannah didn’t solve all of her problems, but it did give her the encouragement she needed that day. Each of us can play a small part in helping others along their journey.

Each of us can help.

Every caring adult, coach, parent, mentor, pastor, teacher, or counselor can offer hope to others in need.

Please understand that you matter.

We must fight to help kids, teens, and adults. Because we each matter!

The need for kids and adults to show up for one another has never been greater. Kids, teens, and adults are struggling with despair like never before.

Hope is our greatest weapon in the battle against despair.

The important thing to remember is that we don’t need to be perfect.

We need to show up, see them, just listen, speak life, and help them develop grit.

It is important that we have the right tools, but we also need to know that there is grace. When we mess up or say the wrong thing, the good news is there is grace.

Reading or listening to this may have you feeling a bit overwhelmed or unsure where to start.

Will encourages readers to start with one.

Start with one kid, one tool, or one moment. Just start with one.

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[1] Hutcherson, W., & Williams, C. (2021). Seen: Healing Despair and Anxiety in Kids and Teens Through the Power of Connection.

Chinwé Williams opens this chapter with a story about her first counseling position as a high school counselor. During her time there, Chinwé, two students she refers to, Imani and Dayna. Both of these girls had played varsity basketball the year before but failed to make the team this particular year. The team had recruited new student-athletes to join the team which increased the competition.

Following a few weeks of counseling with Chinwé, she noticed a few things. Chinwé describes Imani as feeling empowered and determined to put in extra hard work to try out next season. Dayna, a lifelong athlete, decided she wasn’t fit for basketball. Dayna fought self-esteem issues that year, while Imani made the team the next time around.

The drastically different outcomes caused Chinwé to ask serious questions.

What caused one student to give up while the other one put in the hard work and succeeded in making the team?

The short answer is resilience.

Resilience can also be referred to as GRIT.

Angela Duckwork, a leading expert on grit, defines it this way.

"Grit is passion and sustained persistence applied toward long-term achievement!”

Preparing for Trouble

Possessing resilience or GRIT does not mean that stress or trouble won’t come your way. Those who have developed GRIT have seen their fair share of trials. They know what it means to struggle or experience distress. As kids and teens grow into adults, it is important for them to see that stress, change, and disappointment are all part of being human.

It is also important for them to see that they can develop strategies and coping skills to face these challenges head-on.

There are studies that show that optimism and flexibility are linked to resilience.

Reframing

The practice or act of reframing negative events is linked to resilience.

What is reframing?

It is a strategy often utilized by counselors or therapists that helps people look at situations or circumstances differently.

Reframing can be used to help people focus on the things they have as opposed to what they might have lost. It can be a helpful tool to help focus on what items are within our control versus what is outside our control.

How can we play this out?

Situation or event:

A get-together was canceled due to poor weather.

Kid or teen reaction:

The child experiences feelings of rejection, withdraws to their room, and feels disappointed, even to the point of feeling angry.

Parental Response:

“I can see that you are really disappointed that you don’t get to spend time with your friends. I know how much you were looking forward to it. I can understand why you would feel that way. Sometimes, when similar things happen to me, it helps to try and look at things differently.”

“What is something we could do, that we might not have done if the weather was nice?”

“We could possibly go to that new movie you were looking forward to seeing. Or maybe we could go check out books at the library? What are your thoughts? Do you have any other ideas?”

Learning to reframe a situation can be an invaluable tool in adapting and coping with life challenges.

As caring adults, mentors, or friends, we can play a crucial role in helping others develop these critical life skills. This is not only helpful for others, it is also helpful for us too.

Be a Safe Person

Helping a kid, teen, or adult feel safe is a tremendous ability. We all experience stress, despair, and times of uncertainty. As a parent of a young child, you will serve as an emotional barometer as they go through situations. A caring...

Speak Life

Chinwé opens this chapter by telling a story about a girl named Halle. Halle was a 16-year-old high school junior. At first, Chinwé was blown away by the confidence, poise, and self-control. By the end of their first session, she realized Halle was struggling. According to Chinwé, Halle was plagued by negative self-talk.

What Chinwé learned was that while Halle had a wonderful, loving home environment, Halle had experienced relationships where her friend groups ridiculed and ostracized her.

Halle proved a common myth wrong in that many people falsely believe that if terrible things haven’t happened to them, then they have no reason to experience feelings of despair.

Affirm Kids Constantly

Many kids are exposed to an overwhelming amount of critical and accusatory voices around them. What this means is that is more important now than ever for kids and teens to hear words of affirmation.

A Call to Fathers

It is crucial for fathers to know the important role they play in the life of their son or daughter. The words you say mold them and have a life-long impact on their lives.

“If you are the father of a daughter, I have a special request of you: Affirm your daughters. Not just by words and gestures, but by intentional and consistent actions that send the message you are there for them. The research is clear. Fathers play a pivotal role in their daughter's self-image, self-esteem, and body image.”

Spark Purpose and Passion

It can be difficult to know what to say when a kid or teen is in the midst of despair. Kids and teens hold so much potential, yet many times they don’t realize it. As parents, mentors, coaches, or caring adults, we play a pivotal role in the development of that potential. The words we use to encourage and lift up children around us hold great influence on the future of our community.

Oftentimes, in teens, adults can see glimpses of greatness where gifts and abilities have yet to be developed. By recognizing and calling out what potential you see you can provide hope while speaking God’s blessings over their lives.

It is important that adults pay attention to tone, eye contact, and intentionality.

If you find yourself wondering where to begin here are a few tips.

Start out by saying things like:

- “You are amazing!”

- “You are so bright!”

- “I am proud of you!”

It is also important to remind them to whom they belong by saying:

- “God is going to do something great in and through you.”

- “You are fearfully and wonderfully made.”

- “You are a child of God.”

Speaking positive words to yourself can change the way your brain is wired. Following several decades of research, scientists know that the human brain is plastic, meaning it can adapt and change physically and chemically. In Dr. Caroline Leaf’s book Switch on Your Brain, she says that humans can change the structure of the brain through the thoughts we consistently think.

In their book titled Words Can Change Your Brain, Dr. Andrew Newberg and Marc Robert Waldman wrote, “…a single word has the power to influence the expression of genes…”

So despite what some might lead you to believe, our words matter, A LOT!

Get Rid of the Ants

Dr. Daniel Amen came up with the idea of Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) after an infestation of ants in his home. Ever since, he has taught his patients how to get rid of the Ants that are interrupting their lives.

Quick science lesson

Did you know that scientists found that we have an average of 6200 thoughts in a day? With each and every thought, our brains release chemical energy. With all of those thoughts, there are bound to be good ones, neutral ones, and bad...

I can remember the time in my childhood when, as elementary students, we would have regular time on the playground with our friends. Inevitably, someone in our friend group or another group would say something quite hurtful. Oftentimes, this was the result of being hurt by the action or inaction of another peer in the group. The response from most kids in that generation would go something like this, “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”

The sticks and stones phrase so proudly held by many kids could not be further from the truth. As kids, teens, and, eventually, adults, we learn just how much words have the power to uplift as well as tear down. When people are hurt, whether by friends, foes, or someone we love, it can easily result in us lashing out at another unsuspecting individual. This occurrence is often portrayed by the popular phrase, “Hurting people hurt people.”

In the book Seen, by Will Hutcherson and Chinwé Williams say that “when we are in distress, our responses, words, and actions may hurt others around us. This makes sense when you look at how the brain is wired.” The specific wiring mentioned here is our internal alert system known as the amygdala.

The Amygdala

The amygdala is the part of our brain that tells us when we might be in danger. When our brain detects danger, it floods the body with a stress hormone called cortisol. This process helps our bodies kick into high gear to steer us out of a dangerous situation.

The authors of Seen say that when a teen is in despair, their amygdala is activated. Likewise, as adults, our amygdala might be activated when experiencing despair. Anytime our alert system is activated, it can be challenging to think clearly.

Will and Chinwé say that this activation of the amygdala creates two challenges.

1. For the person in despair.
2. For the person trying to support them.

Caution

The person in despair will often unintentionally say things that are unkind. This can create a challenge for them and others around them. For anyone around them trying to be supportive, it is important to approach them with empathy. Remember that their words may come from despair, and be mindful not to be triggered by what they say.

Be a Good Listener

When trying to help support someone, it can be challenging to sit and actively listen with empathy.

If you have ever been placed in a room in close proximity to others facing them it can be hard not to try and fill the awkward silence.

In the book, Will describes an exercise where he had a mom and daughter face each other, hold hands, and lock eyes for two minutes. Will describes the first minute as “weird.” The daughter’s shoulders were tense and he describes them as “in a shrugged position.” After one minute, the daughter’s shoulders began to relax. As the daughter began to feel safe, she started to open up.

If this exercise sounds odd, I get it. It illustrates what it can often take to break the cycle of bad listening.

Direct all of your focus on the other person.

Get the other person talking

Avoid trying to fix the situation.

Will recommends:

-Talking less

-Watching your tone

-Make eye contact

Will talks about incorporating eye contact into your daily routine as parents.

Here are Will’s examples:

• When your kid walks into the room, stop what you're doing, look at them, and let them know you are happy to see them.
• Before they walk out the door in the morning, pause, look at them for 30 seconds, and say, "I love you. I believe in you. And no matter what, I am for you!"
• At the dinner table, look into their eyes as they talk about their...

Will opens with a story about his son, Liam.

He had asked his son to clean his room while he was working in his home office. After a few failed attempts to motivate his son, he tried to incentivize his ask by paying him $3 if he cleaned his room. If he failed to clean his room, his son would owe Will $3. The idea backfired when his son, in tears, brought in his whole piggy bank, begging him to take his money. His son, Liam, felt disconnected from his dad and needed time to reconnect.

Liam didn’t know how to express what he needed and Will acknowledged that he was slow in recognizing the need.

“To lead kids and teenagers, first you have to see them. When they feel seen, you win their heart. Seeing them requires us to look beyond how they behave on the outside to try and understand what they may be feeling on the inside.”

I would take this quote a step further to include adults. We all need to feel seen by those around us. We need others to try and understand what we are feeling on the inside.

Seeing Beyond the Behavior

Anytime a kid or adult faces despair, their behavior may not be what you expect. For someone facing despair, you might see irritability, moodiness, pulling away, or shutting down.

Will encourages readers to ask themselves, "Do I know where they are coming from?"

Will provides these examples:

• What may have happened earlier that day?

• What trust has been eroded from past disappointments?

• What kind of trauma have they experienced from the pain of poverty or a high-crime neighborhood?

• What social pressures might they be facing that we have no idea about?

• What kind of pain are they carrying from the daily reminders of political and social injustice?

• What shame might they be carrying from poor decisions or an abusive situation?

Depending on your relationship with the other person, you may know a lot, but realize that you don't know everything they face.

If you are a coach, small group leader, pastor, or caring adult, you often won't know what they are dealing with until you ask.

The questions above help us see beyond the behavior and empathize with the other person.

See What They Feel

"If you want to get in tune with your kids, you have to see past their behavior and understand what they are really feeling."

According to the book The Power of Showing Up, the best place to begin is to avoid shaming, labeling, or dismissing.

Let's talk through an example. In the book, Will Hutcherson provides a similar scenario.

Your daughter comes home from school and is upset. You learn that she has failed her math test. She throws her backpack down as she walks into the room and begins to cry.

As a parent, there are several ways you could respond to the situation. Your first inclination might be to shame, label, or dismiss.

Let's take a look:

Shaming: "You failed your test?! How could you do that? That was stupid!”

Labeling: "You know you failed your test because you are lazy. If you just worked harder and spent less time playing on your phone or that silly video game, you would have done better."

Dismissing: "No worries. There's no reason to be upset. It's just one test; you'll get it next time."

These responses might seem like the logical thing to say, but can hurt the person on the receiving end.

We often fail to realize that by going straight for the logical, we can unintentionally invalidate their emotions.

When a teen or adult is experiencing despair, jumping straight to logic can "worsen feelings of loneliness or beliefs that no one 'gets them.'"

Instead of...

A Brief Recap

In our last episode, you might recall that when we become hopeless and disconnected from our emotional state, the two halves of the brain begin to separate. This dis-pairing process is called emotional detachment.

When the two sides of our brain are detached, it makes dealing with the constant flow of emotions difficult.

When kids or adults feel seen, it helps the two parts of the brain come back together.

There are tools that can be used to aid the pairing process.

​

First Pairing Tool - Show Up

If you don’t get anything else, pay attention to this chapter. Showing up is the foundation for all of the other pairing tools.

Why?

“…presence influences healing more than anything.”

“In moments of despair, the people we love need our “outside the door” kind of presence. That kind of presence creates safety like nothing else can. It may seem small, but when we show up, the brain responds in predictable ways.”

“Remember the parent-child attachment we discussed earlier? Showing up isn’t the goal of parenting; secure attachment is the goal. But showing up is the beginning step to accomplish that goal.”

5 Ways to Show Up

1. Show Up Before They Ask You To

As kids grow into teenagers, it can often give parents the idea that their child doesn’t need them anymore. This starts when a child is suddenly embarrassed to have their parent around, and it can feel as though they are pushing you away. It is easy for parents to get offended or hurt and assume their child doesn’t need them.

While it can certainly feel this way, kids often need parents more as they grow into their teen years. It is critical that parents initiate regular, quality time with their teens.

2. Show Up for What Matters to Them

If you do not know what matters to your child, it is time to put on your detective hat. What matters to a teen may not be the most enjoyable activity for their parent. Regardless, it is important to make this process about them.

• Go with them to their sporting activities, dance, ballet, plays, etc.
• Take them to see their favorite musician or band in concert.
• If they’re into superheroes, go to the opening of their favorite character.
• Play video games with them.

This is a time when you show up with no agenda of your own. Simply enjoy time with them.

3. Show Up When It’s Inconvenient

In many moments, it is easy to feel like you are not needed or wanted as a parent. In their time of crisis, real or imaginary, show up. As parents, we have been showing up their whole lives until this point. This season may look a little different, but it is just as important as when they were little.

As kids mature, this might look like staying up late with them or picking them up from a party where they felt uncomfortable or unsafe. It’s important as parents that we show up, especially when it’s inconvenient.

4. Show Up Often

Find ways to be predictably available.

Here are a few ideas:

• Create a “conversation place” in your home. A place that is just for conversations. No phones, no screens, just people.

• Be intentional about creating moments. Be available during drive times, evenings, and bedtimes.

• If there is a time when you start to realize your kids are most likely to talk or open up, clear that time in your schedule.

•Text them occasionally to let them know you are thinking about them or praying for them. (Not to the extent you’re stalking, of course.)

The act of showing up often in predictable ways that are not...

The Brain

Is made up of two hemispheres and two essential functions.

• Left Brain
• Right Brain

​

Right Brain

Responsible for emotional processing.

This is where the amygdala processes fear and other emotions that activate 'fight, flight, or freeze' during stressful or dangerous situations. It's also the part of the brain affected by parent-child attachment (more on that later).

Left Brain

Responsible for logical processing.

The left side of the brain is responsible for logical processing. This is the part of the brain where one's ability to plan and organize takes place.

​

When our brains are calm, the left brain is able to be its logical self.

When we’re upset, the emotional right brain takes over, and we react based on our emotions.

This is true for anyone who has experienced trauma or has an insecure parent-child attachment.

With a healthy brain, the processing goes back and forth between the emotional right brain and the logical left brain.

We were designed by God with a lot of emotions. We’re created with the ability to pass them over to cognitive processing.

​

“our emotions are real, but we have the ability to consider them logically and determine whether or not what we feel is actually true.”

Example

if I hear a loud bang followed by the sound of shattering glass, l'm instinctively going to be startled. My heart rate will rise because my fight, flight, or freeze response has been triggered on the right side of my brain. But let's say I stop and look around. I am investigating (logical) and discover that a picture has fallen off the wall. Immediately, I take a deep breath, and my stress begins to subside.

Healthy functioning means we're able to deal with our emotions properly. The problem is when we can't logically process our emotions, something else takes place.

That something is despair.

What Is Despair?

The Bible, a text full of descriptions of authentic and raw emotions, references the word "despair" frequently. (We counted 28 instances.)

Their insults have broken my heart, and I am in despair. If only one person would show some pity; if only one would turn and comfort me (Psalms 69:20 NLT).

Despair is what someone feels when they become hopeless and disconnected from their emotional state. Psychologist Mark Goulston describes despair as a 'dis-pairing, where two halves of the brain begin to separate.' This process is also called emotional detachment.

Experiencing stress causes cortisol —a stress hormone-to flood the brain. A constant drip of cortisol causes this detachment or dis-pairing. Understanding this matters because we need our logical processing to be able to navigate our emotions. When the two sides are detached, we can't navigate the constant flow of emotional signals.

​

This detachment explains why those in despair often feel numb. Some describe it like they're experiencing their life outside of themself because it's so difficult for them to identify how they really feel. They can become dissociated from their emotions. The risk of this detachment happening increases when something traumatic happens.

​

Trauma, as well as stresses of life, can cause the amygdala (the part of the brain where fight, flight, or freeze response is located) to become overactivated. This results in all of the emotions building up on the right side of the brain. All the blood flow starts to head that way. The brain essentially goes back to survival mode, and logical processing tends to break...

Will opens with a story about one of his top students, Tyler.

​

Tyler was a seventeen-year-old student who he described as funny, respectful,

and smart. It appeared as if Tyler had it all together. On the inside,

Tyler was struggling with despair.

“He shared with me the struggle he had to get out of bed some mornings. Despite loving the program and the other students, Tyler had moments of self-doubt. In his worst moments, he even had thoughts of ending his life.”

​

“How does a kid who seemingly has it all together get so down? mean, he has so much going for him, right?

He comes from a good family. Check.

He wasn't bullied as a kid. Check.

He didn't have any significant trauma from abuse. Check.

So, what was happening?”

​

Will was seeing similar things in many of his students. Students seemed to be increasingly disengaged or detached in recent years.

Parents and students approached Will with concerns they had for others.

• "They just don't seem like themselves anymore."
• "They're always down!"
• "She is saying some things that are really concerning me."

​

“...more and more students were feeling paralyzed and anxious when facing resistance or obstacles in life. Students were losing their resilience and their motivation.”

Many of Will’s students were self-diagnosing as being depressed, while others were describing panic attacks or anxiety.

​

Even worse, others were describing their past attempts at suicide while others detailed their future plans.

As Will did more investigation, he found that this was happening nationwide.

​

Statistics

Since 2007 ...

• Suicide rates have increased by 76 percent for ages 15 to 19.

• Suicide rates have nearly doubled in teen girls.

• The highest rate of increase in suicide among all age groups is in kids between 10 and 14 years old.

• Depressive symptoms are up 21 percent in boys, and up 50 percent in girls.

• Suicide attempts among black teens increased by 73 percent between 1991 and 2017, and there is an elevated risk of suicide among African-American boys ages 5 to 11.

• In early 2020, an estimated 1 out of 4 young adults contemplated suicide.

• In March 2020, the Disaster Distress Helpline saw an increase of 891 percent in call volume.

A Time When I Blew It

Will returns to the story about Tyler. He says that he believed in Tyler so

much he thought maybe he just needed a push. So, Will worked with

another program leader to come up with a plan. Together, they executed

the plan, believing they would have a new student in 90 days.

During a church retreat, Tyler experienced a setback. The combination of being

away from family and in a spiritually charged environment caused his

anxiety to increase.

When Tyler tried to share his feelings with a leader, they were dismissed.

Instead of acknowledging his feelings, he was meant with statements like

just trust God and keep praying.

On the second night, feeling uncomfortable and alone, Tyler called his

parents. They drove two hours to pick him up without telling any of the

staff.

Shocked, the leaders said, "Well, we are going to have a hard talk about this!”

The "hard talks" they insisted on backfired. Tyler became resistant, disrespectful, and seemed angry.

A few months into their plan, Tyler blindsided them by telling them he wouldn’t be attending the upcoming retreat.

Will was furious with Tyler. He called him into his...

"You now have the proper tools to step into the fight and to stand your ground. There will be days when you'll get it right. When you'll trust in your identity as a loved son or daughter of God and when you practice gratitude--taking captive the lies of worry and replacing those thoughts with ones that are pure and lovely. And there will be days you'll feel like you're outnumbered or like you've made no progress in your mission."

"Given the length of this fight and the likelihood of the highs and lows, I want to encourage you to focus both on the micro and the macro picture."

Micro

This is your today. Right now, in this moment, maybe this hour.

"How can you win the next fight in front of you?"

"How can I take captive this thought? How can I replace this worry?"

Don't look ahead.

Don't look side to side.

Look up.

Fix your eyes on Jesus.

Win this fight.

Take this step.

Claim this ground.

Focus on the small picture.

Macro

"The war is already over. Jesus has already conquered sin, death, hell, and the grave."

Remember Fear Operating System?

It begins with fear, but remember that Jesus has already defeated fear once and for all.

"It might still prowl around and act like a big, tough lion, but it's hollow. Its fangs aren't lethal and its sting is gone."

“The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, 'Abba, Father.'” Romans‬ ‭8‬:‭15‬ ‭NIV‬‬

"For those who have put their faith in Jesus, we no longer need to fall back into fear. We are no longer bound by the ways of this world or the workings of the Enemy. We are freed. And more than that, we're placed into a new family-one where we can, with intimacy, call upon our Father and He will answer."

"No matter what today holds, we can stand assured that on that final day, we will win the war on worry once and for all."

"The macro picture of assurance fuels our micro picture of launching our assault on worry."

"...freedom, hope, joy, peace, and refuge are not only available, but they are also our inheritance."

A Step Towards Freedom

"Jesus has given you all you need for life and godliness(2 Peter 1:3). He has already won the war on worry, defeating death, hell, and the grave once and for all."

"As you go from here and venture into your day-to-day, keep these things in mind: Worry is a lie from the Enemy. We can't necessarily stop him from talking, but we can choose who we listen to: the Enemy or our heavenly Father."

Remember

"Fear can lead to our desire to control, which fuels worry. But God's perfect love drives out fear. When we embrace His love, we move toward surrender and a life characterized by trust."

"As we finish, remember that the peace of God-the one that Paul said surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and your mind (Philippians 4:7). God is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you to Flimself blameless and pure (Ephesians 5:27). You are a loved son or a loved daughter of the King of the universe."

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Description

In this episode, we discuss Who Needs to be Awake All Night. This is part of a study inspired by Winning the War on Worry by Louie Giglio. Each week, we take concepts from Louie Giglio's book, Winning the War on Worry, and apply them to brain health.

Connect

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🙏 Leave a Review

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :) https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354 

[1] Giglio, L. (2022). Winning the War On Worry – Cultivate a Peaceful Heart and a Confident Mind. Thomas Nelson.

Far too often, the reason worry sticks around is we become complacent. We accept worry as just another part of our lives.

“In the previous chapter we looked at how the perfect love of God drives out fear and leads us to surrender our idea of control, which then leads us to worship rather than worry. The more we discover about the love of God, the more we’re wanting and willing to surrender, and the more worship we give to Him.” 1

God Delights in You!

“…the more we delight in God, the more we discover that He delights in us.”1

“The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.”

Zephaniah 3:17

“God takes great delight in you. He quiets all forms of worry and anxiety with His perfect love. And just in case you are ever tempted to listen to the sound of the world and be pulled back into fear, God says that He rejoices over you with singing.”1

How do we win the war on worry?

“We take back the battleground of our minds. We tear down the house that worry built, and we set out to build a new and peace-filled home on the most stable rock and foundation—the person and work of Jesus.”1

It’s Time for a Home Renovation

“The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:4-5

“…you have the power through Christ to identify and bind the power of every lie that comes into your mind. You can take captive every thought! When you commit to this and put it into practice, you begin tearing down the house that worry built, brick by brick and thought by thought.”1

Stand Ready

Don’t expect the demolition process to be easy. Understand that the Enemy isn’t going to just sit there and take it as you pick apart the house he’s built in your heart.

“Whenever you set out to make a change, to start tearing down bricks and demolishing strongholds, the Enemy seems to rise up and attack with even more vengeance.”1

​

“…no weapon forged against you will prevail…” Isaiah 54:17 NIV

“You have all you need, offensively and defensively, to start this process of demolishing the house that worry built.”1

The goal here is to change the way we think.

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and

“…when we invite God into our worry, we begin to realize that more than any solution, He wants to give us a Savior. He wants to invite us into an intimate and personal relationship with His Son.”1

“The counteragent for worry isn’t control. It’s faith rooted in love.”

Introduction

Louie opens by telling a story about when he was in college. He was in a

long-distance relationship with Shelley, his wife. She was going to

school at Baylor University. He would often get in the car and drive

for hours just to see Shelley for a few minutes.

He did these things because he was hopelessly in love with Shelley.

God’s Great Love For You

“Do you realize God has left a stunningly powerful message of love for you? He hung the greatest ‘I love you’ of all time on a tree at Calvary through the death of His Son. You can see His message from wherever you are today if you just turn and look toward the cross.”

“He has never loved you more because of your good deeds, nor has He ever loved you less because of the sinful acts you have committed. He is love. His love is unchanging. It is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.”

“In His love we have the only weapon we’ll ever need to extinguish and eradicate worry from our lives.”

What’s Your Operating System?

“We have a hardware (our bodies) and a software (our minds and spirits). When it comes to winning the war on worry by recognizing the power of perfect love, we need to take a step back and ask ourselves, what operating system are we using?”

“This is the breakdown of where most of our worry comes from: Fear → Control → Worry”

“We entertain feelings of fear, often stemming from questions starting with, “What if?” Think back to chapter 1: What if I get sick? What if I don’t measure up? What if I lose a loved one or my job or my house? What if she walks away from the marriage? What if people found out just how broken I am?”

“Our fear leads us to try to control. To try to stand up and straighten up. To take the necessary actions to avoid negative outcomes. But our shoulders were never meant to carry the weight of being in full control.”

“So, as we realize that control is actually quicksand pulling us even farther under, we begin to worry.”

“Fear spawns the need for control, which gives birth to worry. And from worry comes a whole host of unhealthy practices and compromises.”

“If that’s the formula for how the world operates, what about how we as children of God should operate? It goes like this:  Love→Surrender → Trust”

“When we invite God into our worry and dwell in an abiding relationship with Jesus, our operating system shifts. Instead of fear being the motivator for our lives, we start with love.”

“That’s what Scripture means when it says in 1 John 4:18-19: ‘There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us.’”

“When we experience and internalize the perfect love of God, there is no room for fear.”

“Perfect love drives out fear. And once fear is gone, we no longer have the pressing need for control.”

“Instead, we can be free to fully surrender and...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Louie Giglio's book. Each week, I take concepts from Winning the War on Worry and apply them to brain health.

"Knowing who worry is (a liar) and what worry is made of (its anatomy-rooted in fear), we can know our Enemy and his tactics. " [1]

"And knowing our Enemy is essential to being able to fight well." [1]

"If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle." [2]

"As we continue this journey to become more equipped to win the war on worry, we know our Enemy: his sole purpose is to take us down and steal our joy (John 10:10)."

"We also need to know ourselves; and most importantly, we need to know our God. Because here's the reality: if we don't know God, we won't be able or willing to invite Him into our worry." [1]

"That's a big problem, because the act of inviting God into our worry is one of the most crucial strategies of winning this war." [1]

Going On the Offensive

"It's not enough to call worry out or to break it down and study it. If we want to win this battle, we need to strap on our armor and get ready to go on the offensive." [1]

Our first move

To surrender our concerns to God in prayer.

"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done" Philippians 4:6 NLT

"...Paul wasn't just saying "don't worry." He was giving you an additional offensive step to take. He was encouraging you to invite God into your worry by telling Him everything that's concerning you." [1]

"The word worry in this verse means 'to rip into pieces.' It's the same for the word anxiety in Scripture. Anxiety and worry tear our minds and hearts apart. That's why we have the phrase, 'I was worried to pieces.' Worry turns our peace into pieces." [1]

"God wants us to bring every little piece to Him. That's the first step in how God brings us peace." [1]

Just like Adam and Eve in the garden, our first response when we miss the mark is to hide or run from God.

"We run from God when we need to be running to Him." [1]

1. Don't try and fix worry on your...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Louie Giglio's book. Each week, I take concepts from Winning the War on Worry and apply them to brain health.

Louie opens by telling a story about how his wife Shelly is an A-Z person while he is an A-B type personality.

He deeply loves and appreciates his wife.

But both personality types are susceptible to worry.

“We learned in the previous chapter about the anatomy of worry and how the different themes of worry are connected by the same thread: control. And while we determined that our ability to control our lives is an illusion, we still need to address the question of how we can reject control and fear while still accounting for planning, preparation, and concern.” [1]

“God calls you to steward what you have in your hands.

He gives you decision-making authority over what He has entrusted to you.” [1]

“Matthew 25 – Jesus tells the parable about a master who goes away for an extended period of time. This master entrusts a considerable amount of money to his three servants.” [1]

1st Servant – 5 talents or 100 years’ worth of wages.

2nd Servant – 2 talents

3rd Servant – 1 talent

“He gave talents according to their ability.” [1]

Learning to Plan Without Practicing Worry

“Planning: Planning is a constructive and tangible process where steps and actions are linked together for future outcomes.” [1]

“While planning, contingencies are always in place for unexpected events or delays. But these contingency plans do not impede our ability to move toward the next step with confidence.” [1]

“In other words, planning is about leveraging your gifts and resources around what is in your hand at this moment, and moving it forward, step by step.” [1]

“If planning is a constructive and tangible process, worry is the projection of an endless string of what-if scenarios that absorbs all present effort (what you could be doing with what is currently in your hands). This string of what ifs often brings fear and paralysis that keeps us from our next steps.” [1]

“Planning focuses on the present and on what is in your hands, while occasionally looking ahead to factor in what is to come. Worry fixates on the future, while occasionally circling back to “work” on what is currently in front of you.” [1]

“The third servant in the story of the talents got paralyzed by the what ifs.” [1]

What if I lose the money?

What if I’m not capable?

What if the other...

This is the aftershow to The Anatomy of Worry. No show notes to speak of.

Enjoy!

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https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Louie opens the chapter with a story about a time he and his wife attended a NASCAR race. While they were there, they had the opportunity to ride around the track in one of the pace cars. They sat in the back while a twenty-year NASCAR veteran driver drove them around the track at well over one hundred miles per hour.

Louie talks in detail about how he was freaking out until he realized this professional driver had been doing this for years. Their prerace drive was nothing out of the ordinary for this driver. At the end of their drive, everyone in the car piled out laughing and talking about how fun it was. They could do this because they weren’t in control. The NASCAR driver was.

If you are feeling weighed down by feelings of worry, it is most likely that you are trying to control something or someone that you were not designed to control.

This is the way worry works. It begins with a logical thought that we should be concerned about XYZ. It is up to us to be prepared for whatever might come our way, right?

5 Major Themes of Worry1

We worry about:

1. A dangerous outcome
2. A threatening confrontation
3. A shortage of resources
4. Our ability
5. Global Disaster

A Dangerous Outcome

• We may worry about a cancer diagnosis for a friend or family member
• We may worry about a friend who, while traveling has an accident
• We may worry about our parents getting a divorce

A Threatening Confrontation

• Maybe you need to talk to your boss about a situation, and you worry about getting into an argument.
• It could be you worry about a conversation with your parents turning confrontational.

A Shortage of Resources

• Maybe you are worried about losing your job.
• You could be concerned about running out of time for a project.

Our Ability

• Will we make the cut?
• Do they like me?
• Did I do good enough?

Global Disaster

• Will there be another pandemic?
• Are we going to war?
• Will there be an economic crisis?

Dissecting Worry

Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden

They believed the lies of the Enemy encapsulated in questions like Is God good? Can He be trusted?

“When they held the fruit in their hands, they wanted to control their fate. They wanted to make sure they were in charge–or at least they had as much authority and ability as the God who had formed them and given them purpose.”1

“It turned out God wasn’t trying to keep anything from them with His command. In fact, God was seeking to protect their peaceful state.”1

“It’s one thing to try to make someone doubt God’s goodness in the midst of the pain and death we face on a broken planet. But how do you get someone who lives in Paradise to fall for a lie?”1

“…so you should be convinced that he’ll be bold enough to come after you.”1

His plan will involve a two-pronged attack.

1. “…he’ll attempt to get you to doubt God’s character and motives.”1
2. “…he’ll try to convince you that life will be better when you are in control…”

“We’ve already established that the root of worry is fear. And fear doesn’t come from God. Thus, at the heart of worry is the devil. And Scripture is clear the devil is a liar.”1

Louie Giglio

“When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies” (John 8:44).

“To put it simply, worry isn’t just a bad habit. Worry is an Enemy tactic-a strategy built on lies that are designed to rob you of peace and tear your mind to pieces.”1

Louie Giglio

The Four Lies of Worry

Lie 1: Something really bad is going to happen.

“A 2019 study from Penn State showed that roughly 91 percent of the things we worry about never even happen.”2

“…most of what you’re spending your time worrying about won’t happen.”1

Lie 2: The more you worry about it, the better your odds of avoiding it.

“…the Enemy wants you to believe that if you worry or fret over a certain outcome long enough, you can keep something bad from happening.”1

“I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.” (Matthew 6:25-26, 34)

Lie 3: I have no choice-I’m a born worrier.

Louie opens by telling a story about how his parents were big worriers.

“Being sixteen, I was clueless about most of the weight my parents were carrying. But that night, as I went to leave our apartment and walk to a friend’s house, he said, ‘I’ve just had the worst day of my life. I need everyone to just stay in the house tonight.'”1

“I only fully understood this when I was older and I started having the same feelings. I realized that I, too, could easily tip toward fearing a dreadful outcome. I would naturally obsess over the question, ‘What’s the worst thing that could happen?'”1

“if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”

(2 Corinthians 5:17).

“We may have a genetic tendency toward worry. And, more powerfully, we may have been weaned in a worrying culture. Worry is what we saw others do. Worry is what we learned. Worry is what we are prone to repeat.”1

“if you are in Christ, all those old patterns were disrupted the instant you were born again. You have a new Father in heaven. He has never worried for one second in His eternal existence. He wasn’t worried yesterday. Nor is He today. He will not be worried tomorrow.”1

Lie 4: I can control the outcome by worrying.

“You are not God. While worry wants you to think you’re in the...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Louie Giglio's book. Each week, I take concepts from Winning the War on Worry and apply them to brain health.

“Worry is so prevalent in our society and throughout our daily lives that it often feels inescapable. Instead of worry being an occasional event, many of us have learned to embrace worry as a part of the fabric of our lives. Worry has become woven into our regular rhythms, and for many of us, it’s become an identity. We say, ‘I’m a worrier. It’s just the way I am.’ As a result, we live in a perpetual state of being worried about something. In fact, you might already be worried about the promise and prospect of this book.”1 -Louie Giglio

“As believers, we are meant to live a life characterized by the light and easy yoke of Jesus (Matthew 11:30), and the more room we give what ifs, the more heavily burdened we become.”1 -Louie Giglio

“”Worry is like a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.””2 -Arthur Somers Roche

Worry is an equal opportunity offender.

“Worry can weasel into the hearts of business leaders, professional athletes, high-school seniors, first-time moms, creatives and artists and producers and designers and software engineers. It can creep into the minds of chefs and astronauts, truck drivers and teachers. It can even get into the minds of pastors and people who are called to work for the church.”1

“…worry is a choice.”1 -Louie Giglio

“God can conquer worry because He has already been victorious over the ultimate root of worry: fear. We’ll dig into this in a later chapter, but 1 John 4:18 says it so well: ‘There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.'”1

“God is greater than fear and all its cousins- depression, anxiety, panic, and worry. And if God is greater, you and I can experience freedom from the grip of worry that robs us of sleep and peace.”1

“I believe that as we go through these next chapters together, the truths you encounter will have the potential to set you on a new path and give you the tools you need to replace worry with a greater sense of trust in the Almighty.”1

“Throughout our journey together, we’ll look at both the theological and the practical. We’ll fix our eyes on the only One who has perfectly conquered worry and anxiety, while also setting our feet into motion as we go to war on worry. If you stick with this, I believe you will find help for the headache and hardship lingering in your life. However, please understand, this is no self-help guide.”

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

“When you’re winning, you’re winning. When you’re losing, you’re learning.”1 Craig Groeschel

We must remember to keep moving forward.

“As you continue walking, you’ll find that you are moving out of your past and into your future.”1 Craig Groeschel

Remember

• You are walking into your future, into the who you want to be.
• You are walking away from the sin or self-destructive behavior you want to leave behind
• You are walking toward the new habits and new life you’ve wanted for so long.

“As we’ve learned, it takes time to get to what you want most.”

What you want now almost always has an immediate payoff.1

• That cookie tastes good now.
• Sexual sin feels good now.
• Sending that mean text when you are angry feels great now.
• Buying the new car, even though you can’t afford it, feels awe-
• some now.

“The desires of the flesh have an immediate payoff. But what you want most almost always takes time.”1

“You can have it! But not now. You walk there, with the Spirit, while depending on God, moment by moment. It will take time, but it will be worth it. You may miss out on some short-term fleeting satisfaction, but you will realize you chose the greater reward. You chose what you want most over what you want now.”1

Exercise

Taking into account everything you have learned throughout the book, and all that God has shown you as you’ve worked through every exercise, let’s calculate your next steps.1

I know the first step I need to take in starting a new habit is:

I know the first step I need to take in stopping an old habit is:

The one change I believe God is calling me to make- in his power, not my own_-is:

Principle

“When you’re winning, you’re winning.

When you’re losing, you’re learning.”1

“And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” Colossians 2:6-7 NLT

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⭐️ Leave A Review

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Craig Groeschel opens this section by telling a story about an old house (1910) he and his wife Amy lived in early in their marriage. In his den, he had a couch, lamp, and a little TV. One night they tried to turn on the lamp, and it wouldn’t come on. Neither would the TV. Thinking it might be a blown fuse, Craig told Amy he would try to fix it. While he was working on it they brought in extension cords that they plugged into outlets in the kitchen. These cords created an eyesore that they tripped over for three years. One day when they were getting ready to move out, they found a light switch they hadn’t seen before. [1]

When they flipped the switch, all of the outlets in the den worked. For three years, they had power, they just didn’t know how to access it. [1]

“That is also a fairly solid description of my early years of following Jesus. I needed God’s power. It was available to me. But I didn’t know how to access it. How to live in it. How to walk by the Spirit.” [1]

“Whoever it is that you want to become or stop being, whatever it is that you want to do or stop doing, you need more than willpower. You need God’s power.” [1]

God can give you the power to: [1]

• Love someone who is difficult to love
• Serve when you’d rather be served
• Give when it’s scary to give
• Study when you’d rather play
• Spend time with your child when you would rather relax

“…how do you rely on God’s power – rather than willpower to overcome the temptation to do wrong?” [1]

“How do you walk in the Spirit in those moments?” [1]

“Here are the four words I introduced to you at the end of the last chapter: Renew. Remain. Acknowledge. Ask.” [1]

There are two for before the moment and two for in the moment. [1]

Renew

Craig Groeschel tells a story about a time in college when he decided he wanted to live for Jesus. He struggled with this decision because he didn’t want to give up sex. Realizing how difficult this would be, he knew he needed God’s power. He felt led to give up dating for an extended period. This time would serve as a point of renewing his way of thinking about women and relationships. [1]

“To walk in the Spirit, in God’s power, we need to renew our minds: ‘Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God-this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will’ (Rom. 12:1-2).” [1]

“The key to living out God’s ‘good, pleasing and perfect will’ is being ‘transformed by the renewing of your mind.'” [1]

“When we allow God to change the way we think, it will change how we act.” [1]

“When we allow God to change the way we think, it will change how we act, how we respond to opportunities and temptations, how we treat people. It will change everything.” [1]

“This takes us full circle back to ‘who before do.’ You do what you do because of what you think of you. We said that how you think about yourself drives your behavior. Here’s another truth bomb: how you think about everything impacts everything.” [1]

You renew your mind by consistently reading the Bible. Your success depends on your commitment. [1]

Another way to renew our...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

It’s All You – Introduction

Craig Groeschel opens the section with a story about his friend Paco. The two of them were at the gym doing a chest burnout. After lifting a bunch of very heavy weights, you switch to a lower weight and perform high-rep bench presses until you are worn out. At the end of the workout, the goal was to bench the bar fifty times. Paco was really into this and kept encouraging Craig along the way. He would yell, “Keep going. It’s all you!” Toward the end, Craig saw that Paco had control of the bar, so he let go, and magically the bar kept going up and down. Eventually, Paco realized what was happening, and they both began laughing.

“…at the end of my power, I discover God’s power. His power is always there. When I am weak, he is strong.”1

“Willpower doesn’t work, but God’s power does, and his power is: “1

• Available
• Accessible
• Active
• Abundant

“So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.”

Galatians 5:16-17

“The ‘Spirit’ is the Holy Spirit; God in us. When you give yourself to God, he gives himself to you. He moves inside of you– like the creme filling in a Twinkie. He lives inside you to empower you to live the life he has for you.”1

“Paul also wrote about the ‘flesh.’ The Greek word translated ‘flesh’ is sarx, used 149 times in the New Testament “1

“Part of you wants to lead you in a way you really don’t want to go; in a way God doesn’t want you to go. That part of you explains why you keep doing what you don’t want to keep doing, as in: “1

• “I don’t want to keep gambling.”
• “I don’t want to keep talking about people behind their backs.”
• “I don’t want to keep looking at that website.”
• “I don’t want to keep feeling jealous.”
• ” “I don’t want to keep spending more money than I have on things I don’t even need.”
• “I don’t want to keep wasting my life scrolling through photos of other people’s lives.”

“I don’t want to, but I do.”1

“For it is we who are the circumcision, we who serve God by his Spirit, who boast in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh—”

Philippians‬ ‭3‬:‭3‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“In other words, we put no confidence in our own willpower.”1

“So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.”

‭‭Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭16‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“Walking by the Spirit, rather than the flesh, is a decision to live, overcome our self-destructive habits, and pursue our goals not in our power but in God’s. Because we can’t, but he can.”

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

But God Can - Intro

Craig Groeschel begins this section much like the last, telling a story. In this instance, he tells about a Buick Century he once owned that got rear-ended. [1]

Prior to the accident, his Buick had “Sport Coupe” stenciled on the side. When he got it back from the repair shop, it had “Turbo Coupe” instead of “Sport Coupe.” [1]

“Because willpower doesn’t work, you and I really require more power. We can think we’re a Turbo Coupe, but we’re still just a Sport Coupe.” [1]

“Paul knew he needed more power. That’s why he asked in Romans 7:24, “Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death?” (NIT). That is the question we all need to answer.” [1]

“But Paul answered his own question with his next sentence in verse 25: ‘Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord’ (NLT).” [1]

“Paul understood, I can’t get myself unstuck, so I need a power I don’t possess. The power he found was Jesus. Paul discovered, I can’t. But God can.” [1]

“Let’s look at something Paul wrote in another of his letters:’As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins’ (Eph. 2-1). Wow. The reality is, we don’t just feel stuck, we are stuck. Worse than stuck, we are dead.” [1]

“That’s discouraging. But Paul provided some hope-inducing truth. ‘I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead’ (Eph. 1:19-20 NLT).” [1]

“The same power that got Jesus out of a grave, resurrected from death to life, is available to you.” [1]

“In the next chapter of Ephesians, Paul wrote, ‘But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) (2:4-5 NLT).” [1]

“God will continue giving you new life in your dead places until his work is complete in you.” [1]

“Paul wrote that because of God’s grace, you have been “saved.”

Saved is a verb. You can write a verb in past, present, future, or perfect tense.

Past tense speaks of something that has already happened.

Present tense describes something happening right now.

Future tense refers to something that will happen eventually but hasn’t yet. [1]

“Perfect tense speaks of something that has happened in the past, is still happening in the present, and will continue in the future. It draws attention to the continuing effects of something that has happened in the past.

Paul wrote ‘saved’ in perfect tense! You were saved by God’s grace in the past, but the effect is still happening.” [1]

“You never have to feel defeated.

You can never give up.

Because God didn’t just save you. He saves you. He is constantly saving you.” [1]

“God will continue giving you new life in your dead places until his work is complete in you.” [1]

“You can’t, but God can. And God will, if you turn to his power.” [1]

Exercise

Complete these sentences to write out a prayer, being as specific as you can in what you are asking God to do in your life. Use this pattern as many times as you need. [1]

God, I can’t:

But you can by:

Principle

"You can’t, but God...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Craig Groeschel begins the section by telling a funny story about a thirty-five-year-old woman in Ness, Kansas, who got stuck sitting on the toilet for two years. [1]

She sat there so long her skin grew around the toilet seat. [1]

Her boyfriend brought her food and water and asked her to come out every day. [1]

Each day her response was, “Maybe tomorrow.” [1]

I think to some extent, we have all been that woman. We have all gotten stuck in different capacities thinking that maybe tomorrow will be different.

Sure, you might not be stuck on the toilet, but we all get stuck in a situation.

It could be:1

• A job you hate
• You are stuck spiritually, hoping to take things to the next level.
• You are overweight and in poor shape.
• You desperately want to stop yelling at your kids.
• Maybe you want to spend more quality time with your spouse.

So, how do we get unstuck?

Let’s take a look at the story of Paul.

He was Jewish and strongly against Christianity and following Jesus.

After a magnificent encounter with Jesus, he was radically changed.

He went from persecuting Christians to being a pastor.

“I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good. So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.

And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.

I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death?” Romans 7:15-24 NLT

“We can all relate to Paul because he was confessing that he was dying inside.

Paul wanted to do what God wanted. But he was stuck in patterns of sin, wrong thinking, bad habits, and addictive behavior.

He had tried. And tried. And nothing had worked.” [1]

Paul’s story is so relatable and relevant to where many of us are today.

You may wonder, “Why was Paul stuck?” Then again, why do we get stuck?

Here is what we have learned.

It could be because: [1]

1. We put do before who.
2. We try instead of train.
3. We hope for change instead of starting (and stopping) the right (and wrong) habits.
4. We do occasionally what we should do consistently.

“We stay stuck because we rely on willpower instead of God’s power.”  -Craig Groeschel

The problem with my situation and probably your situation is we mistakingly believe that we can do it. [1]

The truth is we can’t. [1]

You might say, “Now, wait a minute, Craig, that is not very motivating.”

Sometimes the truth hurts. Understand I am going somewhere with this.

For far too long, you and I go about trying to do something in our own power. Maybe you are trying to quit a bad habit, and you say to yourself, “I can quit whenever I...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

“Farmers know that you not only reap what you sow but also reap after you sow.”1

“You plant in one season and then have to wait until another season for the harvest.”1

“The same is true in life. But we so often miss this. That’s why we get discouraged. That’s why we wrongly conclude that small decisions don’t matter. It’s why we’re tempted to quit.”1

We get started doing something:1

-Going to the gym

-Going to marriage counseling

-Eating right

-Saving money by not eating out

After one month, we get discouraged because:1

-We aren’t meeting our goals

-We still fight with our spouse

-We only lost one pound

-We only saved $300

“Remember, getting the life you want will be the result of countless seemingly small decisions, done consistently over time. They will feel insignificant, but with every action, you are choosing a direction.”1

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

Galatians 6:9

“When your marriage or health or finances or spiritual impact are struggling, you think, It’s bad, and it will never be better. You grow weary of trying to make things better. You tried to change, but it didn’t work. And that confirmed your belief that you are pathetic and will always be stuck. Those. Are. Lies.”1

“Your hard work, your discipline, your sacrifices, and your faithfulness are never wasted. Your efforts are just being stored up.”1

James Clear calls the waiting between sowing and reaping the “Plateau of Latent Potential” or the “Valley of Disappointment.”1, 52

“In the Valley of Disappointment, we feel like all of our trying has been worthless No. “This work was not wasted?” Clear writes, “It was simply being stored.”1, 53

One day you wake up and:1

-Your marriage is better than ever

-You’re leading a Bible study

-Your skinny jeans fit again

-You are debt free

“They didn’t see you getting up early. Working out. Praying. Fasting. Going to your support group. Saying no when you wanted to say yes. Training. Confessing. Sweating. Holding your tongue. Writing encouraging notes. Putting your phone down. Getting counseling.”1

Don’t give up:1

• Believing
• Praying
• Sharing your faith
• Fighting to stay pure
• Getting up early
• Saying “I love you”
• Asking
• Walking forward
• . Having faith that God will free you from addiction
• Studying
• Forgiving
• Climbing out of debt
• Sacrificing
• Choosing what you want most over what you want now

“You won’t see the results you want today. Be patient. You’ve planted the right seeds. The harvest will come.”

“It won’t be because you had the best intentions or high hopes but because your actions determined your direction.”1

Exercise1

Where have you given up and need God’s help to get started again?

Where are you struggling and being tempted to give up and need God’s help to endure?

Where are you experiencing a harvest and reaping more than you have sown?

Principle

You will reap a harvest if you don’t give up.

“They are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season.

Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do.”

Psalm 1:3 NLT

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Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

“You don’t just reap what you sow.

You reap more than you sow.” [1]

“If you put a kernel of wheat in the ground, it will produce a stalk with three heads of wheat. A head can contain fifteen to thirty five kernels.” [1]

“True in agriculture. Also true in life.”1

Why do you reap more than you sow?

The Cumulative Effect

“The cumulative effect is the powerful outcome produced by an action that happens, even if it’s small, over and over across a long period of time.” [1]

Example: Magic Penny

First Option

“I will give you a magic penny that doubles every day for one month. So on the first day it’s one penny.

The second day it’s two. The third day it’s four, and so on.” [1]

Second option

“I’ll give you that penny or $5 million.” [1]

“At the end of the thirty days, that penny would be worth $5,368,709. Unless it’s a thirty-one-day month, then double the extra day and it would be worth $10,737,418. You’d be a fool to take the $5 million. “ [1]

“But so often we settle because we discount the cumulative effect: the powerful impact of something happening over and over for a long period of time.” [1]

The Compound Effect

“This is typically called “compounding interest,” used in reference to finances. This is the interest you get on the interest.” [1]

“Grasping the significance of these principles will change your life. In fact, they have already shaped your life.” [1]

“Who you are today is because of the cumulative and compound effects.” [1]

In his special message at the beginning of Darren Hardy’s book The Compound Effect Anthony Robbins writes, “Decisions shape your destiny. Little everyday decisons will either take you to the life vou desire or to disaster by default.” [2]

Financial

“If you want to win financially, start now and consistently do the small, right thing.” [1]

Physical

“If you eat just one hundred more calories than you burn every day, you will gain ten pounds in a year.” [1]

James Clear writes, “Time magnifies the margin between success and failure. It will multiply whatever you feed it. Good habits make time your ally. Bad habits make time your enemy.” [3]

“A small difference each day adds up and multiplies over time.” [1]

Spiritual

“You read about a spiritual hero – like a Billy Graham. Or you meet someone who is close to God and has a powerful impact on people for him.” [1]

This causes you to want what they have. You desire to be like this person. [1]

“There’s a reason those people are tight with God and have become a spiritual force. They consistently do spiritual disciplines that connect them to God.” [1]

The Small Stuff

Book – Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff [1]

Realize that “it’s all small stuff.”

When it comes to our habits, “there is no such thing as ‘small stuff.'” [1]

Because of the cumulative effect and compounding interest. [1]

• Saving two dollars a day and putting it into a retirement account is not small stuff.
• Eating an extra hundred-calorie bag is not small stuff.
• Deciding to skip working out today is not small stuff.
• Telling your spouse...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

We’ve been talking a lot about habits. We’ve probably said a time or two that habits shape your life.

You may have thought to yourself, “Where does God tell us that in the Bible?”

Short answer

Galatians 6

“…God doesn’t use the word habits. He uses the metaphor of seeds.” [1]

“In biblical times, people lived in an agricultural society.” [1]

“People back then would understand the concept of planting seeds and harvesting crops…” [1]

“Their lives and economy were based largely by on farming.” [1]

“Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Gal. 6:7-9).

Let’s establish some definitions: [1]

• To sow means to plant-to put seed in the ground.
• To reap means to gather the fruit the result of the seed planted.

So the passage starts, “Do not be deceived.” [1]

“The idea is: don’t be led astray. Don’t be fooled, or stupid.” [1]

“It continues, ‘God cannot be mocked.’ The Greek word translated mocked means to snub or thumb your nose at someone. You can do that to someone, but not God. Don’t be deceived, God cannot be mocked. You might fool a lot of people, but youre not going to fool God.” [1]

“‘A man reaps what he sows’ That’s what we need to understand and not be stupid about.” [1]

What does that mean? [1]

• You will harvest what you plant.
• You will get out what you put in.
• Your outcomes will be determined by your inputs.
• The results of your life will be based on the decisions you make, the habits you stake, and the habits you break.

Sowing seeds to the flesh vs the spirit [1]

“There’s a law at work. Not a law like ‘You must do this!’ More like how gravity is a law of nature. It’s how the world works. You don’t have to like it. You don’t have to agree with it.” [1]

“Gravity work for you, and on you the same way it works with everyone.” [1]

“God tells us there is a law of sowing and reaping.” [1]

“True in agriculture. True in life.” [1]

“If you plant good habits, you’ll get good outcomes. If you plant bad habits, don’t be deceived and expect good outcomes.” [1]

“If you don’t like what you’re reaping, change what you’re sowing. If you don’t like the harvest, change the seed.” [1]

Exercise

“Here’s the assignment we just covered. Use this pattern for as many areas of life as you need to address.” [1]

God, I have sown [BLANK] and have reaped [BLANK] because of my habit of [BLANK].

To change this outcome, I need to start or stop my habit of [BLANK], so help me to plant the seeds of [BLANK] so l can reap [BLANK].

Principle

“If you don’t like what you’re reaping, change what you’re sowing. If you don’t like the harvest, change the seed.” [1]

“You will always harvest what you plant. Those who live only to satisfy their own sinful nature will harvest decay and death from that sinful nature.” [1]

But those who live to please the Spirit will harvest everlasting...

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss consistently doing the right things, in this case, our habits. This episode is part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

CONNECT

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💼 Connect on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/craigbooker/

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LEAVE A REVIEW

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

“What if you had met Elon Musk in 1995 when he left Stanford University to start his first software company?” [1]

“What if you’d met Simone Biles when she was fourteen years old and competing in her first classic gymnastics event in her hometown of Houston, Texas?” [1]

Would you have been able to spot something different in either of these examples ten-plus years ago?

“What if I told you I could predict what your life will be like in ten years?“ [1]

What if I could tell whether you’ll be:1

• Better off financially
• Closer to God
• Healthier
• More together than ever
• Happier
• In a circle of good friends

“The life you are living right now is shaping the life you will live tomorrow.” -Craig Groeschel

How?

“Because your habits today are telegraphing your future. The life you are living right now is shaping the life you will live tomorrow.” [1]

“We all have the best intentions, but intentions don’t determine direction. Actions do.” [1]

“We all have hopes. But hoping for a different future doesn’t lead to a different future. Hope doesn’t change your life. Habits do.” [1]

“So if you keep doing what you’ve been doing, you’ll keep getting what You’ve been getting. The life you’re living today is shaping the life you’ll live tomorrow.” [1]

“The life you want can be the life you’re living in ten years. But you will not get there because of your intentions, your hopes, or a few ‘lucky breaks.'” [1]

Two Essential Components

Let’s focus on two essential components you’ll need to become the you that you want to be. [1]

Small

“The first component is ‘small.’ Remember: the small things no one sees can lead to the big results everyone wants. The issue with small things is that they are easy to do but also easy not to do. They never seem significant. Ignoring or skipping them always feels acceptable. But you sculpt your life with the small stuff.” [1]

Consistent

“The second component is ‘consistent.’ Doing the small thing once is insignificant. Doing the right small things over and over has magnitude you cannot measure.” [1]

“…getting the life you want will be the result of countless seemingly small decisions, done consistently over time.” [1]

The Story of Nehemiah

Nehemiah was the cupbearer for Artaxerxes, the King of Persia. [1]

The Babylonians invaded Jerusalem during Daniel’s time, seventy years before Nehemiah. [1]

The Babylonians destroyed...

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss fanatical consistency. This episode was part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

CONNECT

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter https://overflow.community/newsletter/

💼 Connect on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/craigbooker/

📷 Connect on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/craigbooker/

LEAVE A REVIEW

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

EPISODE DESCRIPTION

In this episode, we discuss the chapter From So to Who which is about goals. This episode was part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

CONNECT

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter https://overflow.community/newsletter/

💼 Connect on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/craigbooker/

📷 Connect on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/craigbooker/

LEAVE A REVIEW

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss How To Stop Before You Flop, which is about stopping habits. This episode was part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Connect

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter https://overflow.community/newsletter/

💼 Connect on LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/craigbooker/

📷 Connect on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/craigbooker/

Leave a Review

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

First, Make Your Habit Obvious

A small change in what you see can lead to a big shift in what you do. [1]

“You don’t have to be the victim of your environment. You can also be the architect of it.” -James Clear

Example: [1]

Craig Groeschel prioritizes taking his daily supplements. He takes them first thing in the morning. He believes his supplements provide him with a mental edge. To ensure he takes them first thing, he puts them on the counter where he cannot miss them.

Behavioral scientists in Great Britain did a study involving a couple hundred people who wanted to start exercising.

The people were divided into three groups.

Group:

1 – Committed to exercising.

2 – Committed to exercising and reading lots of material on the benefits of exercising.

3 – Committed to exercising and chose the day, time, and place to exercise.

Who kept their commitment?

1 + 2 – Only 36 percent of the first two groups kept their commitment.

3 – 91 percent kept their commitment.

Barely a third of the people in the first two groups succeeded, but more than nine of ten who committed to a time and place met their goals! [1]

Why?

They made their goals obvious by preloading their decisions.

You can make it even more obvious by tying your new habit into something you already do.

I will _ after I __.

Habitologists call connecting a new habit to a current habit “habit stacking.” [1]

This is how our brain works.

Your brain builds up connections between neurons that are used frequently. Your brain removes connections between neurons that are not used. (That process is sometimes called “synaptic pruning.”) [1]

Those removed or “pruned” connections are why it’s so difficult to remember something you rarely do and so challenging to start doing it. [1]

Morning Routines

Example: [1]

Craig Groeschel’s Morning Routine

1. My alarm goes off, waking me up.
2. 18o to the bathroom. (Not a chosen habit, but you gotta do
3. what you gotta do.)
4. After going to the bathroom, I do my Bible plan.
5. After doing my Bible plan, I pray.
6. After praying, I read my daily declarations.
7. After reading my daily declarations, I make my oatmeal and put twelve berries in it. (Some days I go crazy and do up to fifteen!)
8. After eating my oatmeal (and berries), I take my supplements.
9. After the supplements, I take a shower.
10. After my shower, I shave.
11. After I shave, I get dressed.
12. After I get dressed, I pray with Amy.
13. After I pray with Amy, I leave for work

Second, Make Your Habit Attractive

The reason you do most of what

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Craig Groeschel tells a great story about his dog Sadie.

Sadie follows predictable routines based on visual cues.

We tend to do the same thing. Like Sadie, we are creatures of habit. We respond to simple cues.

And if we’re going to start healthy habits and stop hurtful ones,

We need to first make sure we understand how habits work.

What Is a Habit?

A habit is like autopilot or cruise control for the brain. The human brain seeks out ways to save energy. One of the ways it accomplishes this is through habits. Habits allow us to do things without engaging the brain to think about them or the need to make decisions.

A habit allows good or bad behavior to happen without your brain having to take charge. -Craig Groeschel

How Are Habits Born?

1. Cue
2. Response
3. Reward

James Clear adds a fourth option:

1. Cue
2. Craving
3. Response
4. Reward [2]

Cue 

A trigger that alerts your brain to go into autopilot by engaging the habit. [1]

Craving

The craving is the physical, mental, or emotional need the cue leads you to want to satisfy.

Response

The response is the behavior you routinely fall into.

Reward

The reward is how the behavior makes you feel.

If you engage in the same loop–cue, craving, response, reward–enough times, the process will become automatic. -Craig Groeschel

Get Intentional About Your Cues

1. Place
2. Time
3. Mood
4. Moments
5. People

PLACES

"A place can be the cue that initiates a habit loop." [1]

Example: When you get in bed, your body knows it is time to sleep.

TIMES

“Certain times can trigger behaviors.”

Example: If you typically exercise early in the morning, you might feel inspired to go for a run or ride a bicycle.

At night, when everyone is asleep, you may tend to worry as you lie in bed.

"Time and place matter a lot. When we create a plan for establishing new habits and ending old ones, time and place will be essential." [1]

Here’s our strategy:

1. We will create time and place triggers to start a good habit.
2. We will remove time and place triggers to stop a bad habit.

MOODS

"Moods can cue cravings and lead us into behaviors." [1]

HALT Acronym

Hungry, Angry, Lonely, and Tired. [1]

MOMENTS

"Certain types of moments launch specific habit loops." [1]

PEOPLE

"Wrong people can be cues that lead us in the wrong direction. The good news is that right people can trigger right behavior. Studies prove that the closer you get to someone, the more likely it is you’ll have the same habits." [1]

Exercise

Working through the five major triggers/cues, list positives and negatives for each in your life right now. Remember, these are to discover consistent tendencies, not one-off incidents. [1]

PLACES

Places that cue a positive response:

Places that trigger a negative response:

TIMES

Times that cue a positive response:

Times that trigger a negative...

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter Flossing Saved My Life. In this chapter, we learn how small habits can make a big difference. This is part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Connect

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter

💼 Connect on LinkedIn

📷 Connect on Instagram 

Leave A Review

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss the chapter, Change Your Life - Change Your Habits. This is part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Connect

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter

💼 Connect on LinkedIn

📷 Connect on Instagram 

Leave A Review

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Sources:

[1] Groeschel, C. (2023). The Power to Change: Mastering the Habits That Matter Most. Zondervan.

Enjoy Overflow content? Leave a tip here https://pages.overflow.community/products/tip-jar

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss I'm in Training. This is part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Connect

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter

💼 Connect on LinkedIn

📷 Connect on Instagram 

Leave A Review

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Episode Description

In this episode, we discuss strategic habits. This is part of a study inspired by The Power To Change by Craig Groeschel. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Connect

✉️ Subscribe to the newsletter

💼 Connect on LinkedIn

📷 Connect on Instagram 

Leave A Review

If you enjoyed listening to the podcast, we'd love for you to leave a review on Apple Podcasts to help others discover the show :)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/overflow-with-craig-booker/id1707602354

Sources:

[1] Groeschel, C. (2023). The Power to Change: Mastering the Habits That Matter Most. Zondervan.

Enjoy Overflow content? Leave a tip here https://pages.overflow.community/products/tip-jar

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

“Discipline is choosing what you want most over what you want now.” -Craig Groeschel

Recap

Last week we discussed training versus trying.

Here’s a brief recap.

• Trying doesn't work. Training does.
• Trying is an attempt to do the right thing by exerting effort in the moment.
• Training is a commitment to strategic habits you do before the moment that equip you to do the right thing in the moment. [1]

Embrace training versus trying will require discipline.

Discipline is painful.

No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way. ‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭12‬:‭11‬ ‭NLT‬‬

You are going to experience pain. Discipline may feel painful, but if you don’t live a disciplined life, you will experience the pain of regret. Craig Groeschel

Pastor Craig goes on to say, “Not choosing what you want now feels painful. But if you do choose what you want now, you will later experience the pain of not having what you want most.” [1]

Choose your pain.

• Discipline - The pain of not getting what you want now.
• Regret - Not having what you want most.

Desire alone won’t get you what you want most, but discipline will.

Craig Groeschel

But I am not a disciplined person.

You might be thinking, I am just not a disciplined person. I understand how you are feeling, but this is simply NOT TRUE.

When most people consider whether or not they are disciplined, they tend to focus on the areas of their lives where they lack discipline.

How do I know this?

This is me. I see all of the areas I want to change, yet have failed to do so. I’d bet you do something similar.

You are disciplined.

In his book, Pastor Craig says, “Think of discipline as choosing to do what’s important to you. You repeatedly do some things that are important to you. You eat. You sleep. Those are disciplines.”

There’s a good chance you also do certain disciplines that aren’t good for you. These disciplines are not helping you and could be hurting you.

Examples:

• Overeating when you are stressed.
• Binging hours of tv when you really desire relationships.
• Ruminating all of the worst-case scenarios.
• Checking the locks 20 times before you go to bed. Just to be sure you are safe.

These are also disciplines.

Your desires don’t determine who you become. Your disciplines do. -Craig Groeschel

NOTE: While I have certainly been guilting of those last two examples, I know how difficult it can be to stop. I am not trying to shame anyone, I am trying to help you see other examples of disciplines. Disciplines that involve mental health. There is a lot behind all of those disciplines, and there’s nothing easy about stopping them. Please know that it is possible!

Exercise

Identify the top three areas in your life where you feel you lack discipline.

Next, identify the top three areas in your life where you exhibit the most discipline.

In the parts of

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

” Winners don't try, they train." -Craig Groeschel

What do winners do differently?

A Quick Review

Let's pick up from where we left off in The Thing About Goals.

Why are goals are important?

Goals give us direction and inspiration.

Just like Paul, we must realize that having a goal is NOT enough.

We must define our win.

"Defining your win is how you begin." Craig Groeschel

Remember...

“Defining the win is not how you win but how you begin.” Craig Groeschel

Trying Doesn't Work

Look back at all of the things you tried to do, but failed. Most likely you failed because you were trying not training.

"Trying is an attempt to do the right thing by exerting effort in the moment." Craig Groeschel

If we want to create lasting change, we need to switch from trying to training.

Mental Health Struggles

If you struggle with mental health and desire positive change in your life, you will not get there simply by trying hard. Most likely you have already taken that approach and were disappointed with the results. Keep working to implement change in this way and you are likely to end up depressed and defeated. If you want different results, it will require intentional and deliberate practice over time.

We Need More Power

I would also like to note that just because you are intentional and practice deliberately over time, it does not mean you will succeed. Changes to our mental health involve trauma and other factors(layers). Relying on human power alone whether you are trying or training often leads to defeat. The reality is that human power is limited and quickly dries up.

We must learn to acknowledge our limitations and understand the power that is available to us today.

“I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the heavenly realms.” ‭Ephesians‬ ‭1‬:‭19‬-‭20‬ ‭NLT‬‬

More To Come

We will dig into this more in the future, but like Paul I "pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him." Ephesians‬ ‭1‬:‭19‬-‭20‬ ‭NLT‬

A Training Mentality

No one in history accomplished anything great just because they tried real hard. In one way or another they were intentional much like an athlete goes into training to prepare for a competition.

“Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training... 1 Corinthians‬ ‭9‬:‭25‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.”

Defining your win is how you begin. [1]

Goals Give Direction

"Paul wrote to the Christians in Corinth, a city in Greece." [1]

"Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win!" ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭9‬:‭24‬ ‭NLT‬‬

"I don't run without a goal. And I don't box by beating my fists in the air." ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭9‬:‭26‬ ‭CEV‬‬

"After winning a gold medal in the 1984 Summer Olympics in Los Angeles, Mauro Prosperi decided to compete in the 1994 ultramarathon in Morocco--a weeklong race. Mauro disappeared on the fourth day. He ran into a sandstorm, which caused him to go 181 miles off course. He had no idea where he was going. He was completely lost but still continued to run for nine days!” [1]

You cannot do what you don’t define. Craig Groeschel

Define your win

Pastor Craig’s win:

"To create moments of extraordinary impact with my kids." [1]

Goals Give Inspiration

Before and After Pictures

A Biblical before and after picture.

Key moment:

Paul was on the road to Damascus to persecute more Christians when a bright light surrounded him.

Before this moment, Paul went around killing Christians.

Afterward, he became one of the Christians he used to hunt.

God extended grace to Paul, so Paul’s win became sharing God’s grace by preaching the Word of God.

What led Paul to define his win:

"You know what I was like when I followed the Jewish religion—how I violently persecuted God’s church. I did my best to destroy it. I was far ahead of my fellow Jews in my zeal for the traditions of my ancestors. But even before I was born, God chose me and called me by his marvelous grace. Then it pleased him to reveal his Son to me so that I would proclaim the Good News about Jesus to the Gentiles. When this happened, I did not rush out to consult with any human being." Galatians‬ ‭1‬:‭13‬-‭16‬ ‭NLT‬‬

"Defining the win is not how you win but how you begin." [1]

So, how do you win?

“You win when you quit trying.” [1]

Exercise

What are the primary areas of your life where you need to establish a win?

Examples:

• Career
• Finances
• Health
• Marriage
• Parenting
• Relationship with God

My win is to:

State your goal and who you will share it with for support.

My goal is:

And I commit to sharing this goal with:

Principle

Defining your win is how you begin.

Run to win! 1 Corinthians 9:24 NLT

Sources:

[1] Groeschel, C. (2023). The Power to Change: Mastering the Habits That Matter Most. Zondervan.

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Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

God Changed People’s Names

• Abram became Abraham
• Sarai became Sarah
• Jacob became Israel
• Simon became Peter

Abraham – “father of many”

Sarah – “princess, mother of nations.”

Jacob – “supplanter,” The second born, tricked his father Isaac into giving him Esau’s blessing.

Gideon – the angel showed up and said, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.” Judges 6:12

Why did God change people’s names?

“Because he knew who they truly were, who they would become, and what they needed to do.”

Abram and Sarai were going to have children and become the father and mother of the nation of Israel.

Jacob’s children would become the original twelve tribes of Israel.

Gideon would become the mighty warrior who led God’s people into battle against the Midianites.

Peter would become a foundation, a stabilizing influence for the early church.

“God changed their names because change starts with your identity. You do what you do because of what you think of you. For them to do what they needed to do, they first had to think the right thing about themselves.”

“For you to do what you need to do, for you to change, you first need to think the right thing about yourself. You need to know your true identity, understand your true identity, and start with your identity. You start with who, not do. Why? Because your identity drives your behavior. If you don’t start with your identity, any behavior change you make won’t last.”

Exercise

Complete this open-ended sentence with true aspects of your life: If today, I lost [blank], I would feel totally lost and not know what to do.

Examples: a job, money, social status, a talent or skill

Describe how each aspect of life you wrote down is connected to who you are- -your identity and not just what you do.

How can you turn each one from do to who? How can you surrender that aspect of your life to the point where, if God took it away, you’d still be okay?

Example: I feel like my career has become who lam, not just what I do. But if I got let go or could no longer do that work, I would still be a child of God, still have my life, calling, and family. I would still have the most important things in my life.

Principle

To change, you need to think the right thing about yourself, know your true identity, and start your identity with who, not do.

I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

-Philippians 1:6 NLT

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Sources:

Groeschel, C. (2023). 

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Called to More

Two Types of More

1. Based on Sin

We want more money, a bigger house, cars, clothes, vacations, friends, and followers. It is never enough. No matter how much we have, we always want more.

2. A Godly Type of More

Fulfilling who God created us to be.

Start With Who

When most believers think of calling, they tend to think about do before they think about who.

Do Examples :

• Overseas or inner-city missions
• Start a ministry
• Start a non-profit

These might eventually come, but only after discovering who God is calling you to be.

"Your calling is more about who you are becoming than what you are doing." [1]

"Understanding our who illuminates our do." [1]

"Another way to say this is you are called first to salvation, then to sanctification, then to serving. Sanctification and serving will then run parallel until heaven. The two work hand in hand." [1]

"Let's think about the two whos of Jesus and you and how they give significance to your dos." [1]

Two Whos

1. Jesus - We are called to be like Jesus. Whatever you do, do it for Jesus.

2. You - The person God made you to be.

"If your do is about who God wants you to become and who you want to become, then your do is not small."[1]

Exercise

SALVATION

If you are a follower of Jesus, briefly write out your testimony-how you came to salvation in Christ. (Look back over my story, if needed.)

SANCTIFICATION

List the most significant changes Christ has made in your life since salvation.

SERVING

What is your do -your calling to serve?

Is there a service that you sense God has called you to do, but the opportunity has not come about yet? Explain.

Principle

If your do is about who God wants you to become, about who you want to become, then your do is not small.[1]

Whoever is the least among you is the greatest. -Luke 9:48 NLT

Abram became Abraham

Sarai became Sarah

Jacob became Israel

Simon became Peter

Abraham - “father of many”

Sarah - “princess, mother of nations.”

Jacob - “supplanter,” The second born, tricked his father Isaac into giving him Esau’s blessing.

Gideon - the angel showed up and said, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.” Judges 6:12

Why did God change people's names?

“Because he knew who they truly were, who they would become, and what they needed to do.”

Abram and Sarai were going to have children and become the father and mother of the nation of Israel.

Jacob's children would become the original twelve tribes of Israel.

Gideon would become the mighty warrior who led God's people into battle against the Midianites.

Peter would become a foundation, a stabilizing influence for the early church.

"God changed their names because change starts with your identity. You do what you do because of what you think of you. For them to do what they needed to do, they first had to think the right thing about themselves."[1]

"For you to do what you need to do, for you to change, you first need to think the right thing about yourself. You need to know your true identity,...

Note: A lot of the material is inspired by Craig Groeschel's book. Each week, I take concepts from Pastor Craig Groeschel's book, The Power To Change, and apply them to brain health.

Future You

Who will you be in 10 years?

This is what Pastor Craig refers to as the “Future You.”

Instead of merely trying or wishing for change, we should shift our mindset to that of an athlete training for a competition.

An athlete engages in deliberate practice.

To engage in deliberate practice, we need a clear picture of our “Future You.”

"Hal Hershfield, a psychologist at UCLA, tells us that having a 'future self' --a better version of ourselves that we plan on becoming--will change how we live today. His research shows that seeing yourself as a different, future person empowers you to make decisions for the benefit of 'Future You.'?"

Who do you want to become?

Fixed Mindset

"In her book, Mindset, Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck writes about people who have a 'fixed mindset.' Those who falsely believe that who they are today is who they will always be. Dweck explains that unresolved trauma is one reason people get stuck in a fixed mindset a negative experience can become identity forming."

Growth Mindset

"Dweck also writes about those who have a 'growth mindset.' who luxuriate in 'the power of yet.' People with a growth mindset don't fixate on now because they view themselves as always in a state of becoming. They are confident they are going to become something better, so if they fail or find themselves in an unfavorable circumstance, they view it as a stepping stone to what's next."

You can change your mind.

"Dweck has discovered, through years of research, that people with fixed mindsets can learn to have growth mindsets."

Here’s what the Bible has to say about this topic.

"And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” Phil. 1:6 NLT

"But God shows undeserved kindness to everyone. That's why he appointed Christ Jesus to choose you to share in his eternal glory. You will suffer for a while, but God will make you complete, steady, strong, and firm.” 1 Peter 5:10 CEV

"The verb translated 'continue his work' in the Philippians verse is ἐπιτελέσει. The verbs translated 'make you complete' and make you 'strong, and firm' in the 1 Peter verse are στηρίξει and θεμελιώσει."

"All three are written in the future tense, meaning the action will be happening tomorrow and the day after and the day after that. And all three are written in the indicative mood, meaning the action is not something hoped for or wished for but something that will, for sure, happen.

The good work of transformation God began in you his activity of making you complete, steady, strong, and firm - is something God is doing and will continue to do until his work in you is finally finished."

Exercise

Take a few minutes to write about Future You -the hero you'll be in ten years. Create a target for yourself. Engage in deliberate practice. Tell yourself and God who you want to become. When you're done, pray and commit this new vision to him and ask for his help.

Principle

You will change, and you can become who you want to become.

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. -Philippians 4:13 NLT

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Your who changes your do.

“Who you think you are drives your behavior.” Craig Groeschel

“…it’s critically important for you to know who you are.”

Where we tend to get our identity

What others think of us

“We tend to define ourselves by what we believe influential people in

our lives think about us. Psychologists call it the ‘looking-glass

self.’ We see ourselves through the eyes of others. We let those people

define us, but that is not who we are.”

Our worst sins or habits

“We can also define ourselves by our worst sins or habits.”

Example:

I’m an addict

I’m an anxious person

1. Our Enemy

“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.”

‭‭1 Peter‬ ‭5‬:‭8‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“His primary target is your identity. He knows how essential your self-perception is, so he lies to you about who you are.”

That’s why:

•After you yell at your kids, you think, I’m a bad parent.

•When you don’t get the job, you think, I’m pathetic. I never get any breaks.

•When you realize you didn’t read your Bible or pray again

this week, you think, I’m a bad Christian.

Identity Statements and Bible Verses

• Sought after (Isa. 62:12)

• Precious in his sight (Isa. 43:4)

• A new creation in Christ (2 Cor. 5:17)

• Not condemned (Rom. 8:1)

• Forgiven (Col. 1:14)

• Loved (1 John 3:1)

• Accepted (Rom. 15:7)

• A child of God (John 1:12)

• Jesus’ friend (John 15:14)

• Free (John 8:36)

• The temple of God (1 Cor. 6:19)

• God’s treasured possession (Deut. 7:6)

• Complete in Christ (Col. 2:10 NLT)

• Chosen (Col. 3:12)

• Called (2 Tim. 1:9)

• An ambassador of the Most High God (2 Cor. 5:20)

• God’s masterpiece (Eph. 2:10 NLT)

• Able to do all things through Christ, who gives you strength (Phil. 4:13)

• More than a conqueror through Jesus, who loves you (Rom. 8:37)

Exercise

In this exercise, let’s identify some of the voices that have accused you and told you things about yourself that are not true.

Has someone in your family or some other close relationship

consistently told you something that you have come to believe about

yourself–even though it is not based in truth?

List those lies.

Next, list any accusations you consistently repeat about yourself

that are not on your list of lies, whether or not you know their origin.