The Cult I Left Behind Mon, 16 Mar 2026 00:05:10 -0400 http://www.cultileftbehind.com en-us © 2026 The Cult I Left Behind yes Support this Podcast 9ed2b0e7-bcde-5441-8cae-3d747d55f99e Amanda & Kyle Briggs episodic true Newly-ish married couple, Amanda and Kyle, discuss Amanda’s upbringing in the IBLP cult of Duggar infamy – a story Kyle learns about along with listeners. Through sometimes humorous, sometimes heartbreaking stories, Amanda and Kyle explore the cult’s ideology, the strange rules that surrounded Amanda’s childhood, and the abuse she endured before leaving the cult. Through it all, they talk about what it takes to break free from a cult and what gets left behind.

]]> Buzzsprout (https://www.buzzsprout.com) IBLP, ATI, Cult, Bill Gothard, Duggars, Homeschool, Mental Health, Abuse Healing, Deconstruction Amanda & Kyle Briggs https://storage.buzzsprout.com/oe2wmkyy1j52jypah6ardd8mdxgu?.jpg The Cult I Left Behind http://www.cultileftbehind.com Amanda Briggs Kyle Briggs 100 - Goodbye for Now 100 - Goodbye for Now One hundred episodes. Two and a half years. This is the moment when we pause and look back, say thank you, and close this chapter that is so dear to our hearts. Amanda and Kyle take a trip down memory lane, pay tribute to guests who came on the show, and share two important letters - one to the person who made this show possible, and one for you: the people who made it real because you showed up, week after week. Much love to each of you. 

Stay on the journey with Amanda as she pivots to a new show: The Healing Life

Support the show

]]> One hundred episodes. Two and a half years. This is the moment when we pause and look back, say thank you, and close this chapter that is so dear to our hearts. Amanda and Kyle take a trip down memory lane, pay tribute to guests who came on the show, and share two important letters - one to the person who made this show possible, and one for you: the people who made it real because you showed up, week after week. Much love to each of you. 

Stay on the journey with Amanda as she pivots to a new show: The Healing Life

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18851770 Mon, 16 Mar 2026 00:00:00 -0400 1776 1 100 full true 99 - What Kyle Knows Now 99 - What Kyle Knows Now We've been crying for days, and we're not done yet.

In this penultimate episode, Amanda and Kyle reflect on 2.5 years and nearly 100 episodes of The Cult I Left Behind — what it cost, what it gave back, and what they know now that they didn't when they hit record for the first time.

Amanda shares what this show taught her about her own healing, her foundational wounds around family and belonging, and a moment at the dining room table that gave her something she'd waited almost 40 years for.

Then it's Kyle's turn. For 99 episodes he's been the listener, the witness, the steady presence beside Amanda. Today we celebrate him for modeling what it means to be a safe person for thousands of listeners. Before we close this chapter, Amanda turns the mic around to honor what he's brought to this show and the standard he's set for all of us.

This one's going to require tissues. You've been warned.

Episode 100 — the finale for now — drops in two weeks.

Support the show

]]> We've been crying for days, and we're not done yet.

In this penultimate episode, Amanda and Kyle reflect on 2.5 years and nearly 100 episodes of The Cult I Left Behind — what it cost, what it gave back, and what they know now that they didn't when they hit record for the first time.

Amanda shares what this show taught her about her own healing, her foundational wounds around family and belonging, and a moment at the dining room table that gave her something she'd waited almost 40 years for.

Then it's Kyle's turn. For 99 episodes he's been the listener, the witness, the steady presence beside Amanda. Today we celebrate him for modeling what it means to be a safe person for thousands of listeners. Before we close this chapter, Amanda turns the mic around to honor what he's brought to this show and the standard he's set for all of us.

This one's going to require tissues. You've been warned.

Episode 100 — the finale for now — drops in two weeks.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18772246 Mon, 02 Mar 2026 00:00:00 -0500 2713 1 99 full true 98 - Good Girls Don’t Scream 98 - Good Girls Don’t Scream Many of us who were raised to be good little girls are facing some hard realizations these days.

This episode is a stark look at the links between cults, high-control religion, and sex trafficking rings, and their impact on girls and women.

Amanda grew up inside the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP) cult, a high-control religious system where girls were trained to be compliant, deferential, and self-policing. Being “good” meant protecting the system. It meant absorbing harm quietly. It meant never being the problem.

In this conversation, Amanda and Kyle explore how “good girl” conditioning doesn’t just operate inside cults. It operates anywhere power is protected and girls are expected to stay agreeable. They talk about what it means to be “good” in these systems, about silence, about trauma in the body, and about why watching powerful men avoid consequences can feel destabilizing for women who were trained to keep everyone comfortable at their own expense. 

Support the show

]]> Many of us who were raised to be good little girls are facing some hard realizations these days.

This episode is a stark look at the links between cults, high-control religion, and sex trafficking rings, and their impact on girls and women.

Amanda grew up inside the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP) cult, a high-control religious system where girls were trained to be compliant, deferential, and self-policing. Being “good” meant protecting the system. It meant absorbing harm quietly. It meant never being the problem.

In this conversation, Amanda and Kyle explore how “good girl” conditioning doesn’t just operate inside cults. It operates anywhere power is protected and girls are expected to stay agreeable. They talk about what it means to be “good” in these systems, about silence, about trauma in the body, and about why watching powerful men avoid consequences can feel destabilizing for women who were trained to keep everyone comfortable at their own expense. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18728022 Mon, 23 Feb 2026 00:00:00 -0500 2497 1 98 full true One-Week Delay One-Week Delay We're focusing on our little family this week, but will release back-to-back episodes to make up for the delay. See you in a week! 

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]]> We're focusing on our little family this week, but will release back-to-back episodes to make up for the delay. See you in a week! 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18660564 Sun, 15 Feb 2026 12:00:00 -0500 21 bonus false 97 - Fear: The Foundation of Cults 97 - Fear: The Foundation of Cults Fear lives in the stories we tell ourselves, the categories we cling to, and the way we decide who is safe and who is “other.”

In this episode, Amanda and Kyle examine how fear quietly shapes worldviews in cults, families, belief systems, politics, and everyday thinking. Amanda reflects on a question listeners have asked for years: How did your parents end up in a cult? Her answer is simple, but unsettling: fear.

Together, Amanda and Kyle explore how fear and high-control systems operate in strikingly similar ways. They simplify complexity. They demand certainty. They divide the world into clean categories: good and bad, safe and dangerous, us and them. Over time, those categories harden into ideology and, eventually, into identity.

This conversation also looks inward. How does fear get internalized? How do we inherit beliefs without examining them? How does learned fear turn into a “cult of one,” where data no longer penetrates and unhelpful beliefs go unquestioned?

This episode invites listeners to slow down, notice what fear is doing inside them, and gently interrogate the beliefs they’ve been taught to protect.

If you’ve ever wondered how people come to believe what they believe, this episode offers language, clarity, and a slower, steadier way of noticing what fear is doing inside us.

Support the show

]]> Fear lives in the stories we tell ourselves, the categories we cling to, and the way we decide who is safe and who is “other.”

In this episode, Amanda and Kyle examine how fear quietly shapes worldviews in cults, families, belief systems, politics, and everyday thinking. Amanda reflects on a question listeners have asked for years: How did your parents end up in a cult? Her answer is simple, but unsettling: fear.

Together, Amanda and Kyle explore how fear and high-control systems operate in strikingly similar ways. They simplify complexity. They demand certainty. They divide the world into clean categories: good and bad, safe and dangerous, us and them. Over time, those categories harden into ideology and, eventually, into identity.

This conversation also looks inward. How does fear get internalized? How do we inherit beliefs without examining them? How does learned fear turn into a “cult of one,” where data no longer penetrates and unhelpful beliefs go unquestioned?

This episode invites listeners to slow down, notice what fear is doing inside them, and gently interrogate the beliefs they’ve been taught to protect.

If you’ve ever wondered how people come to believe what they believe, this episode offers language, clarity, and a slower, steadier way of noticing what fear is doing inside us.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18607304 Mon, 02 Feb 2026 00:00:00 -0500 1549 1 97 full true Emergency Statement: January 25, 2026 Emergency Statement: January 25, 2026 Support the show

]]> Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18566791 Sun, 25 Jan 2026 14:00:00 -0500 82 full false 96 - Exposure Isn't Change 96 - Exposure Isn't Change We’re often told that exposure leads to change. That once harm is named, brought into the light, or made public, something will finally shift.

But that hasn’t been Amanda's experience.

In this episode, Amanda and Kyle talk through why exposure alone rarely produces real change and why, in many systems, it actually becomes a substitute for it. They look at how harm can be acknowledged over and over without anything structural changing, how public reaction creates the feeling of accountability without enforcing it, and why the same dynamics keep repeating even when everyone inside the system knows what’s happening.

This conversation is about naming a pattern: the difference between awareness and transformation, and what gets lost when we confuse the two.

If you’ve ever felt unsettled watching harm be exposed again and again with no meaningful consequences, or felt pressure to disclose while power remains untouched, this episode is meant to give you language for that dissonance, and a clearer way of understanding what you’re seeing.

Support the show

]]> We’re often told that exposure leads to change. That once harm is named, brought into the light, or made public, something will finally shift.

But that hasn’t been Amanda's experience.

In this episode, Amanda and Kyle talk through why exposure alone rarely produces real change and why, in many systems, it actually becomes a substitute for it. They look at how harm can be acknowledged over and over without anything structural changing, how public reaction creates the feeling of accountability without enforcing it, and why the same dynamics keep repeating even when everyone inside the system knows what’s happening.

This conversation is about naming a pattern: the difference between awareness and transformation, and what gets lost when we confuse the two.

If you’ve ever felt unsettled watching harm be exposed again and again with no meaningful consequences, or felt pressure to disclose while power remains untouched, this episode is meant to give you language for that dissonance, and a clearer way of understanding what you’re seeing.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18530847 Mon, 19 Jan 2026 00:00:00 -0500 2699 1 96 full true 95 - Jeffrey Epstein, Bill Gothard, and the Architecture of Abuse 95 - Jeffrey Epstein, Bill Gothard, and the Architecture of Abuse In 2024, as public conversations about abuse, grooming, and accountability unfolded again and again, Amanda found herself watching familiar patterns repeat. These patterns felt uncomfortably close to the high-control religious world she thought she had left behind. For Amanda, this was not just cultural commentary. It was personal.

In this episode, Amanda and Kyle step away from sensationalism to offer something different: structure.

Using the cases of Jeffrey Epstein and Bill Gothard, Amanda explains the architecture of abuse. She examines how power is built, protected, and normalized, how grooming operates long before it becomes criminal, and why systems so often defend themselves at the expense of survivors.

Rather than focusing on graphic details or individual pathology, this conversation examines the conditions that allow abuse to flourish. It explores why the stories in the news feel eerily familiar, why true accountability and justice rarely occur, and why simply removing bad actors never fixes the underlying problem.

By the end of this episode, you will have a clearer framework for recognizing grooming and power dynamics.

This episode is for anyone who has felt disoriented watching recent narratives unfold, and for those who want language, clarity, and a steadier way of understanding what is really happening beneath the headlines.

Support the show

]]> In 2024, as public conversations about abuse, grooming, and accountability unfolded again and again, Amanda found herself watching familiar patterns repeat. These patterns felt uncomfortably close to the high-control religious world she thought she had left behind. For Amanda, this was not just cultural commentary. It was personal.

In this episode, Amanda and Kyle step away from sensationalism to offer something different: structure.

Using the cases of Jeffrey Epstein and Bill Gothard, Amanda explains the architecture of abuse. She examines how power is built, protected, and normalized, how grooming operates long before it becomes criminal, and why systems so often defend themselves at the expense of survivors.

Rather than focusing on graphic details or individual pathology, this conversation examines the conditions that allow abuse to flourish. It explores why the stories in the news feel eerily familiar, why true accountability and justice rarely occur, and why simply removing bad actors never fixes the underlying problem.

By the end of this episode, you will have a clearer framework for recognizing grooming and power dynamics.

This episode is for anyone who has felt disoriented watching recent narratives unfold, and for those who want language, clarity, and a steadier way of understanding what is really happening beneath the headlines.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18452947 Mon, 05 Jan 2026 00:00:00 -0500 2427 1 95 full true 94 - Creating Joy When Life Has Been Heavy 94 - Creating Joy When Life Has Been Heavy The holidays come with an expectation of joy. For many people, that expectation can feel impossible.

In this quiet, honest conversation, Amanda shares a truth she’s been sitting with for a long time: healing doesn’t automatically make you receptive to happiness or joy. When your nervous system formed in trauma, joy doesn’t arrive on command, and it often can’t depend on other people or outcomes you can’t control.

Together, Amanda and Kyle talk about trauma and the weight of holding other people’s stories, as well as what it looks like to create moments of joy that aren't forced or performative. Amanda shares how she has reframed joy to focus on small, sensory, unexpected moments that arrive when we make room for them.

If the holidays feel heavy this year, this episode is an invitation to let joy look different — and to know you’re not broken if it does.

Support the show

]]> The holidays come with an expectation of joy. For many people, that expectation can feel impossible.

In this quiet, honest conversation, Amanda shares a truth she’s been sitting with for a long time: healing doesn’t automatically make you receptive to happiness or joy. When your nervous system formed in trauma, joy doesn’t arrive on command, and it often can’t depend on other people or outcomes you can’t control.

Together, Amanda and Kyle talk about trauma and the weight of holding other people’s stories, as well as what it looks like to create moments of joy that aren't forced or performative. Amanda shares how she has reframed joy to focus on small, sensory, unexpected moments that arrive when we make room for them.

If the holidays feel heavy this year, this episode is an invitation to let joy look different — and to know you’re not broken if it does.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18397432 Mon, 22 Dec 2025 00:00:00 -0500 1854 1 94 full true 93 – Am I a Bad Person? (Moral Scrupulosity OCD) 93 – Am I a Bad Person? (Moral Scrupulosity OCD) In this episode, Amanda and Kyle dive into moral scrupulosity OCD and how it has shaped Amanda’s life. She shares openly about the intense anxiety and compulsive behaviors she developed growing up in a high-control religious environment under Bill Gothard’s IBLP cult. These patterns looked like “perfectionism” on the surface but were actually rooted in fear, uncertainty, and shame. 

Amanda discusses the research connecting high-control religion to obsessive-compulsive symptoms and explains how scrupulosity didn’t disappear when she left the belief system, it just changed form. Today, it shows up in relationships, conflict, and her own internal self-perception. She talks through the coping strategies she uses now, the progress she’s making in therapy, and what healing looks like in real time. 

This episode is an honest, thoughtful conversation about anxiety, identity, and the leftover rules your brain keeps long after you’ve left a cult or high control religion behind. 

Support the show

]]> In this episode, Amanda and Kyle dive into moral scrupulosity OCD and how it has shaped Amanda’s life. She shares openly about the intense anxiety and compulsive behaviors she developed growing up in a high-control religious environment under Bill Gothard’s IBLP cult. These patterns looked like “perfectionism” on the surface but were actually rooted in fear, uncertainty, and shame. 

Amanda discusses the research connecting high-control religion to obsessive-compulsive symptoms and explains how scrupulosity didn’t disappear when she left the belief system, it just changed form. Today, it shows up in relationships, conflict, and her own internal self-perception. She talks through the coping strategies she uses now, the progress she’s making in therapy, and what healing looks like in real time. 

This episode is an honest, thoughtful conversation about anxiety, identity, and the leftover rules your brain keeps long after you’ve left a cult or high control religion behind. 

Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-18315607 Mon, 08 Dec 2025 00:00:00 -0500 2301 1 93 full true First Family Sickness & Thanksgiving Wishes First Family Sickness & Thanksgiving Wishes We’ll see you next week, when we’re feeling better, for an episode Amanda is so excited to share with you all! We’re grateful for you and we love you guys! 

Support the show

]]> We’ll see you next week, when we’re feeling better, for an episode Amanda is so excited to share with you all! We’re grateful for you and we love you guys! 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18241434 Sun, 23 Nov 2025 21:00:00 -0500 114 1 bonus false 92 - A Day in the Life of a Deconstructing Parent 92 - A Day in the Life of a Deconstructing Parent Sit in on the first conversation Amanda and Kyle have had together about what they’re learning on their journey as new parents.  Amanda opens up about lifelong fears around the kind of mother she might become, and Kyle reflects on what he actually sees in her.  Together, they laugh (and yawn) their way through the learning curves of parenting and share some of the moments when Amanda’s past collides with the present, such as raising public school kids after growing up in a cult that kept her from ever attending one and therefore having no idea how they work. 

Grab a coffee and come be tired with us. 

Support the show

]]> Sit in on the first conversation Amanda and Kyle have had together about what they’re learning on their journey as new parents.  Amanda opens up about lifelong fears around the kind of mother she might become, and Kyle reflects on what he actually sees in her.  Together, they laugh (and yawn) their way through the learning curves of parenting and share some of the moments when Amanda’s past collides with the present, such as raising public school kids after growing up in a cult that kept her from ever attending one and therefore having no idea how they work. 

Grab a coffee and come be tired with us. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18161372 Mon, 10 Nov 2025 01:00:00 -0500 2115 1 92 full true 91 - Holy Disruptor: Breaking the Silence and the Rules 91 - Holy Disruptor: Breaking the Silence and the Rules Amy Duggar King joins us to talk about her new book Holy Disruptor, and she does not hold back. From growing up around the Duggar family and IBLP to setting boundaries and breaking cycles of silence, Amy brings her whole heart to shining a light on the darkness that shaped her childhood and family. 

We talk about the gap between reality TV and real life, what it means to be labeled the “black sheep,” and how choosing truth and boundaries can lead to real peace. Amy opens up about the process of writing Holy Disruptor, healing generational trauma, and what she’s learned about protecting her own child. 

If you’ve ever been told you’re too much for speaking truth, or if you’re ready to be a holy disruptor yourself, this one’s for you.  

Find Amy’s Book Here 

Connect with Amy on Instagram: @amyrachelleking

Support the show

]]> Amy Duggar King joins us to talk about her new book Holy Disruptor, and she does not hold back. From growing up around the Duggar family and IBLP to setting boundaries and breaking cycles of silence, Amy brings her whole heart to shining a light on the darkness that shaped her childhood and family. 

We talk about the gap between reality TV and real life, what it means to be labeled the “black sheep,” and how choosing truth and boundaries can lead to real peace. Amy opens up about the process of writing Holy Disruptor, healing generational trauma, and what she’s learned about protecting her own child. 

If you’ve ever been told you’re too much for speaking truth, or if you’re ready to be a holy disruptor yourself, this one’s for you.  

Find Amy’s Book Here 

Connect with Amy on Instagram: @amyrachelleking

Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-18078591 Mon, 27 Oct 2025 00:00:00 -0400 3556 1 91 full true 90 - From Resilience to Resourcefulness: Elizabeth Estabrooks on Trauma Recovery 90 - From Resilience to Resourcefulness: Elizabeth Estabrooks on Trauma Recovery Author, veteran, and advocate Elizabeth Estabrooks joins Amanda and Kyle to explore the realities of trauma, institutional betrayal, and what it truly means to heal. Drawing from her decades in sexual assault and domestic violence advocacy, Liz shares the inspiration behind her book Broken in the Stronger Places—and why healing is less about perfection and more about resourcefulness.

Connect with Elizabeth:

www.awomansvoicepress.com

Buy Elizabeth's book here:

Signed Copy

Barnes & Noble

Amazon

Fundraising for the Spanish version of the book:

https://gofund.me/f93ca2f1

Support the show

]]> Author, veteran, and advocate Elizabeth Estabrooks joins Amanda and Kyle to explore the realities of trauma, institutional betrayal, and what it truly means to heal. Drawing from her decades in sexual assault and domestic violence advocacy, Liz shares the inspiration behind her book Broken in the Stronger Places—and why healing is less about perfection and more about resourcefulness.

Connect with Elizabeth:

www.awomansvoicepress.com

Buy Elizabeth's book here:

Signed Copy

Barnes & Noble

Amazon

Fundraising for the Spanish version of the book:

https://gofund.me/f93ca2f1

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-18000260 Mon, 13 Oct 2025 00:00:00 -0400 6965 full false 89 - Dear Diary, Everything Has Changed 89 - Dear Diary, Everything Has Changed In this episode of The Cult I Left Behind, Amanda once more opens up her old diaries from her time in the IBLP cult and the early days of leaving. She reads while Kyle reacts in real time. Together, they talk through what those pages reveal about life inside IBLP, the challenges of leaving, and the moments of growth and hope along the way. Amanda and Kyle also share some important life updates. 

Support the show

]]> In this episode of The Cult I Left Behind, Amanda once more opens up her old diaries from her time in the IBLP cult and the early days of leaving. She reads while Kyle reacts in real time. Together, they talk through what those pages reveal about life inside IBLP, the challenges of leaving, and the moments of growth and hope along the way. Amanda and Kyle also share some important life updates. 

Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-17921673 Mon, 29 Sep 2025 00:00:00 -0400 1981 1 89 full true 88 - The Time Kyle Acquired the Fire: Shiny Happy People Season 2 Recap 88 - The Time Kyle Acquired the Fire: Shiny Happy People Season 2 Recap We’re diving into Shiny Happy People Season 2 — and this time, Kyle’s the one with the inside scoop. While Amanda expected to lead the conversation, it turned out Kyle’s past experience at an Acquire the Fire event made this season his wheelhouse.

In this episode, we share our live reactions, unpack the big themes of Season 2, and talk through why this follow-up series hits differently than the first. Whether you’ve already binged it or are still working up the courage to press play, join us as we process what the doc reveals about high-control religion, manipulation, and the systems that shaped so many of our lives.

Support the show

]]> We’re diving into Shiny Happy People Season 2 — and this time, Kyle’s the one with the inside scoop. While Amanda expected to lead the conversation, it turned out Kyle’s past experience at an Acquire the Fire event made this season his wheelhouse.

In this episode, we share our live reactions, unpack the big themes of Season 2, and talk through why this follow-up series hits differently than the first. Whether you’ve already binged it or are still working up the courage to press play, join us as we process what the doc reveals about high-control religion, manipulation, and the systems that shaped so many of our lives.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17841861 Mon, 15 Sep 2025 00:00:00 -0400 3472 1 88 full true 87 - Chantelle’s Story: From Shame and Control to Healing and Freedom 87 - Chantelle’s Story: From Shame and Control to Healing and Freedom When Chantelle was sent to the cult Headquarters as an “encouragement case,” she encountered Bill Gothard’s inappropriate and abusive behavior toward teenage girls firsthand. She shares what it was like to grow up in IBLP and ATI, survive both Headquarters and the cult’s finishing school for young ladies, and ultimately marry young to escape her father’s “umbrella of authority.” Today, Chantelle uses her story and training in hypnotherapy to educate others and bring healing to those manipulated by shame, guilt, and fear. She also offers practical ideas and resources for people who want to pursue healing but face financial constraints.

Connect with Chantelle:

www.chantellen.com

Resources Chantelle Recommends:

The Tapping Solution App

www.ifsbuddy.chat

Books Chantelle Recommends:

Feeding Your Demons by Tsultrim Allione 

Self-Therapy (3rd Edition) by Jay Earley, PhD

The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer

Support the show

]]> When Chantelle was sent to the cult Headquarters as an “encouragement case,” she encountered Bill Gothard’s inappropriate and abusive behavior toward teenage girls firsthand. She shares what it was like to grow up in IBLP and ATI, survive both Headquarters and the cult’s finishing school for young ladies, and ultimately marry young to escape her father’s “umbrella of authority.” Today, Chantelle uses her story and training in hypnotherapy to educate others and bring healing to those manipulated by shame, guilt, and fear. She also offers practical ideas and resources for people who want to pursue healing but face financial constraints.

Connect with Chantelle:

www.chantellen.com

Resources Chantelle Recommends:

The Tapping Solution App

www.ifsbuddy.chat

Books Chantelle Recommends:

Feeding Your Demons by Tsultrim Allione 

Self-Therapy (3rd Edition) by Jay Earley, PhD

The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17757527 Mon, 01 Sep 2025 00:00:00 -0400 6177 1 87 full true 86 - Mother Wounds with Jessica Jocelyn (Part 2) 86 - Mother Wounds with Jessica Jocelyn (Part 2) In the second half of our conversation with poet Jessica Jocelyn, we pick up where the shocking story of her mom left off. Jessica shares how poetry became a way to make sense of loss, love, and the wounds only a mother can leave behind. Together, Amanda and Jessica talk about healing mother wounds, the fear of becoming like the women who hurt them, and the complicated feelings that surface as we begin to look more and more like our mothers with age. 

Connect with Jessica:
linktr.ee/jessicajocelyn
Instagram: @letters.to.anna
Facebook: Jessica Jocelyn Poetry
TikTok: @jessica.jocelyn

Support the show

]]> In the second half of our conversation with poet Jessica Jocelyn, we pick up where the shocking story of her mom left off. Jessica shares how poetry became a way to make sense of loss, love, and the wounds only a mother can leave behind. Together, Amanda and Jessica talk about healing mother wounds, the fear of becoming like the women who hurt them, and the complicated feelings that surface as we begin to look more and more like our mothers with age. 

Connect with Jessica:
linktr.ee/jessicajocelyn
Instagram: @letters.to.anna
Facebook: Jessica Jocelyn Poetry
TikTok: @jessica.jocelyn

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17681487 Mon, 18 Aug 2025 00:00:00 -0400 4820 1 86 full false 85 - Mother Wounds with Jessica Jocelyn (Part 1) 85 - Mother Wounds with Jessica Jocelyn (Part 1) In Part 1 of this two-part conversation, we’re honored to welcome poet Jessica Jocelyn—whose writing has been a healing touchstone for Amanda and may already be familiar to listeners of the podcast.

Jessica is a best-selling poet whose work explores love, loss, motherhood, and the complexities of family with raw emotional power. She’s the author of five volumes of poetry, all widely praised for their vulnerability, resonance, and reach.

In this episode, we discuss:

  • Jessica’s childhood with a mother who felt more like a cult leader
  • Her experience as an adult convert in the Jehovah’s Witnesses—what led her there, and how she found her way out
  • Her forthcoming poetry collection, Paper Flowers, releasing August 31, 2025

This is the first time Jessica has shared her full story on record—and it’s a wild, heartbreaking, and healing ride.

We can’t wait for you to hear it.

Connect with Jessica:
linktr.ee/jessicajocelyn
Instagram: @letters.to.anna
Facebook: Jessica Jocelyn Poetry
TikTok: @jessica.jocelyn

Support the show

]]> In Part 1 of this two-part conversation, we’re honored to welcome poet Jessica Jocelyn—whose writing has been a healing touchstone for Amanda and may already be familiar to listeners of the podcast.

Jessica is a best-selling poet whose work explores love, loss, motherhood, and the complexities of family with raw emotional power. She’s the author of five volumes of poetry, all widely praised for their vulnerability, resonance, and reach.

In this episode, we discuss:

  • Jessica’s childhood with a mother who felt more like a cult leader
  • Her experience as an adult convert in the Jehovah’s Witnesses—what led her there, and how she found her way out
  • Her forthcoming poetry collection, Paper Flowers, releasing August 31, 2025

This is the first time Jessica has shared her full story on record—and it’s a wild, heartbreaking, and healing ride.

We can’t wait for you to hear it.

Connect with Jessica:
linktr.ee/jessicajocelyn
Instagram: @letters.to.anna
Facebook: Jessica Jocelyn Poetry
TikTok: @jessica.jocelyn

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17607723 Mon, 04 Aug 2025 00:00:00 -0400 5093 1 85 full true 84 - Sometimes, You Get What You Want 84 - Sometimes, You Get What You Want Amanda has gotten a lot of questions about whether she would ever let anyone from her biological family back into her life.

For a long time, the answer was no. But then something changed.

It’s been a year and a half, and we've waited a long time to talk about it. This is the first time we're sharing the story. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda has gotten a lot of questions about whether she would ever let anyone from her biological family back into her life.

For a long time, the answer was no. But then something changed.

It’s been a year and a half, and we've waited a long time to talk about it. This is the first time we're sharing the story. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17536118 Mon, 21 Jul 2025 00:00:00 -0400 1763 cult survivor, IBLP cult, ATI homeschool, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar family, exvangelical, religious trauma, spiritual abuse, recovery, deconstruction, homeschool survivor, leaving a cult, true cult story, family estrangement 1 83 full true 83 - Dear Diary 83 - Dear Diary Amanda reads from her childhood diaries—yes, actual entries from her cult years—and then melts through the floor in embarrassment. It’s awkward, vulnerable, and a surprisingly raw window into growing up homeschooled under fundamentalism. 

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]]> Amanda reads from her childhood diaries—yes, actual entries from her cult years—and then melts through the floor in embarrassment. It’s awkward, vulnerable, and a surprisingly raw window into growing up homeschooled under fundamentalism. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17400938 Mon, 07 Jul 2025 00:00:00 -0400 2759 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religious Trauma, Spiritual Abuse, CSA Survivor, Cult Crimes, Survivor Stories, True Crime, High-Control Religion, Christian Fundamentalism, Healing 1 82 full true 82 - One Story, Two Journeys 82 - One Story, Two Journeys Amanda opens this episode with some never-before-shared stories from her early experiences in therapy—including one that caught even Kyle off guard. From there, the mic turns, and Kyle shares what it was like to hear Amanda’s story for the first time and slowly step into the world of advocacy and trauma-informed care. What begins as reflection becomes something quietly transformative—revealing just how much learning and love can grow side by side. 

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]]> Amanda opens this episode with some never-before-shared stories from her early experiences in therapy—including one that caught even Kyle off guard. From there, the mic turns, and Kyle shares what it was like to hear Amanda’s story for the first time and slowly step into the world of advocacy and trauma-informed care. What begins as reflection becomes something quietly transformative—revealing just how much learning and love can grow side by side. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17378748 Mon, 23 Jun 2025 00:00:00 -0400 2511 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Marriage, Therapy, Trauma-Informed, Sexual Assault, EMDR 1 82 full true 81 - Losing Parents the Second Time 81 - Losing Parents the Second Time In a deeply personal episode, Amanda opens up about the circumstances that led to the end of her relationship with her adoptive parents. What started as a long-building tension came to a head when Amanda asked to be treated like a real daughter—and was told no. She and Kyle walk through the factors that shaped the outcome, what was said, how it unfolded, and what it means to grieve the loss of a family you thought chose you.

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]]> In a deeply personal episode, Amanda opens up about the circumstances that led to the end of her relationship with her adoptive parents. What started as a long-building tension came to a head when Amanda asked to be treated like a real daughter—and was told no. She and Kyle walk through the factors that shaped the outcome, what was said, how it unfolded, and what it means to grieve the loss of a family you thought chose you.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17298267 Mon, 09 Jun 2025 00:00:00 -0400 2708 Bill Gothard, Couple Podcast, IBLP, Cult Podcast, Deconstruction, Duggar, Exvangelical, Healing, Legal, Recovery, Religion, Sexual Assault, Sexual Violence, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Journey, True Crime, True Cult, Family, Adoption, Chosen Family, Parent 1 81 full true 80 - Family Ended With Boundaries 80 - Family Ended With Boundaries Content warning: This episode includes discussion of sexual violence, including against children. 

When Amanda set boundaries with her bio family—and the brother who abused her—she expected it to be hard. But not like this. In this highly personal episode, she shares a glimpse into the painful correspondence with her three younger brothers and their disturbing responses: manipulation, gaslighting, and spiritual abuse. They questioned her story, weaponized religion, and even tried to enlist her ex-husband—claiming he was “God’s authority” over her life—to force her back into the family’s narrative about the abuse. 

This episode explores what happens when family chooses power over love. Kyle joins to unpack the emotional and spiritual toll of being betrayed by those you once protected, what it means to forgive, and what it looks like to walk away when the cost of staying is your truth.

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]]> Content warning: This episode includes discussion of sexual violence, including against children. 

When Amanda set boundaries with her bio family—and the brother who abused her—she expected it to be hard. But not like this. In this highly personal episode, she shares a glimpse into the painful correspondence with her three younger brothers and their disturbing responses: manipulation, gaslighting, and spiritual abuse. They questioned her story, weaponized religion, and even tried to enlist her ex-husband—claiming he was “God’s authority” over her life—to force her back into the family’s narrative about the abuse. 

This episode explores what happens when family chooses power over love. Kyle joins to unpack the emotional and spiritual toll of being betrayed by those you once protected, what it means to forgive, and what it looks like to walk away when the cost of staying is your truth.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17224963 Mon, 26 May 2025 00:00:00 -0400 4447 Bill Gothard, Couple Podcast, IBLP, Cult Podcast, Deconstruction, Duggar, Exvangelical, Healing, Legal, Recovery, Religion, Sexual Assault, Sexual Violence, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Journey, True Crime, True Cult, Family, Siblings, Brothers 1 80 full true 79 - Mother’s Day, Mother Wounds 79 - Mother’s Day, Mother Wounds As The Cult I Left Behind listeners know, Mother’s Day isn’t a sappy Hallmark holiday for Amanda. In this episode, Amanda and Kyle talk about what the day brings up—not just for Amanda, but for anyone who experienced harm from their mothers. Amanda shares a letter she wrote to the mother figures in her life and reflects on how watching motherhood play out in the cult shaped her earliest beliefs—and deepest fears—about what it means to be a mom. She also reads a personal list of fears she’s had about becoming a mother herself, and the steps she’s taken to work through them. The episode closes with a short selection of poetry honoring the pain of mother wounds, plus date and time details for an upcoming livestream. 

Jessica Jocelyn (poet) Instagram: @letters.to.anna

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]]> As The Cult I Left Behind listeners know, Mother’s Day isn’t a sappy Hallmark holiday for Amanda. In this episode, Amanda and Kyle talk about what the day brings up—not just for Amanda, but for anyone who experienced harm from their mothers. Amanda shares a letter she wrote to the mother figures in her life and reflects on how watching motherhood play out in the cult shaped her earliest beliefs—and deepest fears—about what it means to be a mom. She also reads a personal list of fears she’s had about becoming a mother herself, and the steps she’s taken to work through them. The episode closes with a short selection of poetry honoring the pain of mother wounds, plus date and time details for an upcoming livestream. 

Jessica Jocelyn (poet) Instagram: @letters.to.anna

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17139897 Mon, 12 May 2025 00:00:00 -0400 2740 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mother's Day, Mother Wounds, Moms 1 79 full true A Quick Update A Quick Update Unfortunately there was a death in the family and we do not have an episode for this week. However, we have a short update about some interviews and an upcoming livestream. Stay tuned for more information.

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]]> Unfortunately there was a death in the family and we do not have an episode for this week. However, we have a short update about some interviews and an upcoming livestream. Stay tuned for more information.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-17053249 Mon, 28 Apr 2025 00:00:00 -0400 29 1 full false 78 - Discipline Outside the Cult 78 - Discipline Outside the Cult In this companion to the earlier episode on discipline inside the cult, Amanda and Kyle shift their focus to what healthy, respectful discipline actually looks like. They reflect on what they’re learning in their adoption training classes and how sharply it contrasts with the abusive tactics Amanda experienced growing up in the IBLP cult. They also discuss the lasting impact of corporal punishment, including research showing it affects the brain in ways similar to sexual abuse and other forms of violence.

For Amanda, this conversation runs even deeper. As someone who’s lost both a biological and chosen family, the process of preparing to become a parent brings up a lot of questions—about worthiness, healing, and whether having a family is in the cards for her.

This episode holds space for grief, growth, and the kind of parenting that breaks generational cycles.

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]]> In this companion to the earlier episode on discipline inside the cult, Amanda and Kyle shift their focus to what healthy, respectful discipline actually looks like. They reflect on what they’re learning in their adoption training classes and how sharply it contrasts with the abusive tactics Amanda experienced growing up in the IBLP cult. They also discuss the lasting impact of corporal punishment, including research showing it affects the brain in ways similar to sexual abuse and other forms of violence.

For Amanda, this conversation runs even deeper. As someone who’s lost both a biological and chosen family, the process of preparing to become a parent brings up a lot of questions—about worthiness, healing, and whether having a family is in the cards for her.

This episode holds space for grief, growth, and the kind of parenting that breaks generational cycles.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16971992 Mon, 14 Apr 2025 00:00:00 -0400 2784 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Abuse, Family, Parents, Adoption, Discipline, Spanking 1 78 full true 77 - Unpacking the Past: Cults, Faith, and Family Truths 77 - Unpacking the Past: Cults, Faith, and Family Truths In this episode, Amanda and Kyle dive into listener questions about what made Amanda’s parents susceptible to joining the cult, how they became involved, how the cult accumulated massive assets, and whether Amanda’s rapist brother ever received any mental health diagnoses. They also discuss how Amanda’s college viewed the cult's ideology and its current reputation within the evangelical community.

Amanda and Kyle also tackle a thought-provoking question about faith: how does Amanda respond to people who say it wasn’t God who failed her, but people? A nuanced theological conversation follows.

Finally, Amanda and Kyle share a brief update about Amanda’s adoptive parents, addressing listener questions and providing some clarity on where things stand now.

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]]> In this episode, Amanda and Kyle dive into listener questions about what made Amanda’s parents susceptible to joining the cult, how they became involved, how the cult accumulated massive assets, and whether Amanda’s rapist brother ever received any mental health diagnoses. They also discuss how Amanda’s college viewed the cult's ideology and its current reputation within the evangelical community.

Amanda and Kyle also tackle a thought-provoking question about faith: how does Amanda respond to people who say it wasn’t God who failed her, but people? A nuanced theological conversation follows.

Finally, Amanda and Kyle share a brief update about Amanda’s adoptive parents, addressing listener questions and providing some clarity on where things stand now.

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]]> Buzzsprout-16887631 Mon, 31 Mar 2025 00:00:00 -0400 2036 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Religious Trauma, Belief systems, Family, Theology 1 77 full true 76 - Finding Peace in Denmark: A Journey from High-Control to True Relaxation 76 - Finding Peace in Denmark: A Journey from High-Control to True Relaxation In this episode, Amanda and Kyle share their transformative experience during a recent trip to Denmark, contrasting it with Amanda's upbringing in a high-pressure religious environment and subsequent military service. Amanda discusses how the slower pace and quieter, more relaxed culture of Denmark allowed her to feel truly relaxed and safe for the first time in her life. They explore the cultural differences they observed, including the emphasis on work-life balance and the importance of being present, which profoundly impacted Amanda. As they strive to integrate these lessons into their life back in the U.S., Amanda and Kyle also announce an upcoming live stream collaboration focused on discussing life in high-control religious environments.

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]]> In this episode, Amanda and Kyle share their transformative experience during a recent trip to Denmark, contrasting it with Amanda's upbringing in a high-pressure religious environment and subsequent military service. Amanda discusses how the slower pace and quieter, more relaxed culture of Denmark allowed her to feel truly relaxed and safe for the first time in her life. They explore the cultural differences they observed, including the emphasis on work-life balance and the importance of being present, which profoundly impacted Amanda. As they strive to integrate these lessons into their life back in the U.S., Amanda and Kyle also announce an upcoming live stream collaboration focused on discussing life in high-control religious environments.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16802924 Mon, 17 Mar 2025 00:00:00 -0400 2317 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Work-life balance, Culture shock, Slow living, Danish culture, Hygge lifestyle 1 76 full true 75 - How to Deconstruct 75 - How to Deconstruct In this episode, Amanda and Kyle dive into the process of deconstruction—what it is, why it happens, and how it unfolds across different areas of life. From faith and identity to relationships and worldviews, they explore the key domains of deconstruction and the challenges that come with questioning deeply held beliefs. Whether you're in the middle of your own deconstruction journey or just curious about what it entails, this conversation offers insight and validation. 

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]]> In this episode, Amanda and Kyle dive into the process of deconstruction—what it is, why it happens, and how it unfolds across different areas of life. From faith and identity to relationships and worldviews, they explore the key domains of deconstruction and the challenges that come with questioning deeply held beliefs. Whether you're in the middle of your own deconstruction journey or just curious about what it entails, this conversation offers insight and validation. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16721950 Mon, 03 Mar 2025 00:00:00 -0500 2662 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Religious trauma, Identity, Belief systems 1 75 full true 74 - Big Changes, Listener Q&A, and Cult Realities 74 - Big Changes, Listener Q&A, and Cult Realities Some big life changes are on the horizon, and Amanda and Kyle share a bit about their next steps as a family. They also dive into listener questions, discussing the most effective therapy approaches Amanda has found, how the cult handled cases of incest, and its stance on queer folks. It’s a raw and thought-provoking conversation—one you won’t want to miss.

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]]> Some big life changes are on the horizon, and Amanda and Kyle share a bit about their next steps as a family. They also dive into listener questions, discussing the most effective therapy approaches Amanda has found, how the cult handled cases of incest, and its stance on queer folks. It’s a raw and thought-provoking conversation—one you won’t want to miss.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16633623 Mon, 17 Feb 2025 00:00:00 -0500 1526 cult beliefs, therapy approaches, listener Q&A, healing from trauma, incest in cults, LGBTQ+ in cults, survivor stories, mental health, religious trauma, family dynamics 1 74 full true 73 - Growing Up in IBLP: A Male Survivor’s Perspective on Trauma and Healing 73 - Growing Up in IBLP: A Male Survivor’s Perspective on Trauma and Healing In this episode, we sit down with Nate, an IBLP/ATI cult survivor and trauma survivor, to unpack the deeply ingrained conditioning we experienced growing up in the cult. From childhood grooming and the loss of personal identity to the twisted teachings that framed God’s love as something to be earned, we explore the ways the cult set us up for harm. Nate shares his personal journey of launching into adulthood without the tools to navigate the real world, the challenges of healing from childhood and religious trauma, and his experiences as a man seeking therapy. We also discuss what it means to reclaim agency, identity, and self-worth after years of being treated as a prop in someone else's narrative. Was it “worth it all” as IBLP promised? Listen and find out. 

 Adult Children of Alcoholics®& Dysfunctional Families



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]]> In this episode, we sit down with Nate, an IBLP/ATI cult survivor and trauma survivor, to unpack the deeply ingrained conditioning we experienced growing up in the cult. From childhood grooming and the loss of personal identity to the twisted teachings that framed God’s love as something to be earned, we explore the ways the cult set us up for harm. Nate shares his personal journey of launching into adulthood without the tools to navigate the real world, the challenges of healing from childhood and religious trauma, and his experiences as a man seeking therapy. We also discuss what it means to reclaim agency, identity, and self-worth after years of being treated as a prop in someone else's narrative. Was it “worth it all” as IBLP promised? Listen and find out. 

 Adult Children of Alcoholics®& Dysfunctional Families



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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16590734 Mon, 10 Feb 2025 00:00:00 -0500 5537 IBLP, ATI, religious trauma, cult survivor, Bill Gothard, fundamentalism, deconstruction, healing from trauma, therapy for men, childhood grooming, religious abuse, spiritual trauma, identity loss, escaping a cult, recovering from control, personal agency 1 73 full true 72 - Protecting Kids from Sexual Abuse: What Every Parent Should Know 72 - Protecting Kids from Sexual Abuse: What Every Parent Should Know When we think about keeping kids safe from predators, we often imagine dangers lurking in the shadows—but the reality is much harder to face. Most abuse is committed by people close to the family, making prevention both challenging and deeply personal. In this episode, Amanda shares practical, real-world strategies for protecting kids from sexual predators, setting clear boundaries, and creating open lines of communication that empower children to speak up. 

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]]> When we think about keeping kids safe from predators, we often imagine dangers lurking in the shadows—but the reality is much harder to face. Most abuse is committed by people close to the family, making prevention both challenging and deeply personal. In this episode, Amanda shares practical, real-world strategies for protecting kids from sexual predators, setting clear boundaries, and creating open lines of communication that empower children to speak up. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16542352 Mon, 03 Feb 2025 00:00:00 -0500 1909 Child Safety, Protecting Kids, Preventing Child Abuse, Sexual Abuse Prevention, Parenting Tips, Keeping Kids Safe, Child Predators, Empowering Kids, Parent Education, Safety Strategies, Abuse Prevention, Cult Podcast, True Cult 1 72 full true 71 - Your Stories, Our Answers: Family Rejection, Advocacy, and Healing 71 - Your Stories, Our Answers: Family Rejection, Advocacy, and Healing In this episode, Amanda and Kyle tackle listener questions surrounding the impact of purity culture and sexual trauma. They dive into Sadia’s poignant voicemail, discussing how rigid purity culture affects perspectives on sex and consent, and dissect the harmful black-and-white thinking that can follow. Amanda shares personal insights into breaking free from self-blame and replacing toxic family voices in your head with healing ones. They also respond to a touching message from Naomi, a fellow IBLP survivor, highlighting the importance of self-love and the complexities of family rejection. Additionally, they offer practical advice for listeners like Erica, who are navigating through their past and seeking ways to get involved in advocacy and support. This episode is a heartfelt and educational conversation that you don’t want to miss, especially if you are interested in topics like abuse recovery, psychological healing, and community support.

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]]> In this episode, Amanda and Kyle tackle listener questions surrounding the impact of purity culture and sexual trauma. They dive into Sadia’s poignant voicemail, discussing how rigid purity culture affects perspectives on sex and consent, and dissect the harmful black-and-white thinking that can follow. Amanda shares personal insights into breaking free from self-blame and replacing toxic family voices in your head with healing ones. They also respond to a touching message from Naomi, a fellow IBLP survivor, highlighting the importance of self-love and the complexities of family rejection. Additionally, they offer practical advice for listeners like Erica, who are navigating through their past and seeking ways to get involved in advocacy and support. This episode is a heartfelt and educational conversation that you don’t want to miss, especially if you are interested in topics like abuse recovery, psychological healing, and community support.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16507289 Mon, 27 Jan 2025 00:00:00 -0500 3341 purity culture, sexual trauma, consent, self-blame, healing, toxic family dynamics, IBLP survivor, self-love, family rejection, abuse recovery, Advocacy, psychological healing, community support, cult full false 70 - A Conversation with Cult Survivor and Author Daniella Mestyanek Young 70 - A Conversation with Cult Survivor and Author Daniella Mestyanek Young What happens when you escape a world built on control, fear, and secrecy? How do you begin to heal after a life of indoctrination? This week, we're joined by Daniella Mestyanek Young, author, TEDx speaker, and cult survivor, to dive deep into the harrowing and inspiring journey of leaving a cult—and finding yourself on the other side.

Daniella's website: https://uncultureyourself.com/

Buy Daniella's book: https://uncultureyourself.com/pages/book

Instagram: @daniellamyoung_

Facebook: @Daniella Mestyanek Young_Author 

YouTube: @KnittingCultLady

X: @daniellamyoung

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]]> What happens when you escape a world built on control, fear, and secrecy? How do you begin to heal after a life of indoctrination? This week, we're joined by Daniella Mestyanek Young, author, TEDx speaker, and cult survivor, to dive deep into the harrowing and inspiring journey of leaving a cult—and finding yourself on the other side.

Daniella's website: https://uncultureyourself.com/

Buy Daniella's book: https://uncultureyourself.com/pages/book

Instagram: @daniellamyoung_

Facebook: @Daniella Mestyanek Young_Author 

YouTube: @KnittingCultLady

X: @daniellamyoung

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16465652 Mon, 20 Jan 2025 00:00:00 -0500 3848 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Abuse, Daniella Mestyanek Young 1 70 full true 69 - Sex, Healing, and Breaking Generational Cycles 69 - Sex, Healing, and Breaking Generational Cycles In this episode, Amanda and Kyle are joined by Marian, a sexual health and pleasure educator, for a powerful conversation about breaking cycles of shame and stigma. Marian shares her positive experience growing up in a family where vulnerability, honesty, and support were the norm when it came to tough topics like sex.

Together, they explore the stark contrast between Marian’s upbringing and Amanda’s experience in the oppressive purity culture of the cult. They dive into what it means to pass down healing, not shame, to the next generation and how parents can foster openness and healthy communication about sexuality.

They also tackle a listener question about how to talk to kids and teens about sex in an approachable and affirming way, offering practical advice for creating safe spaces for these important conversations.

Plus, Amanda and Kyle share details about some exciting upcoming episodes, including the incredible guests and thought-provoking topics you won’t want to miss. This is a must-listen for anyone interested in promoting sexual health, breaking generational cycles, and embracing honest, healing conversations.

Resources:

https://thepleasureproject.org/the-pleasure-principles/

https://parentandteen.com/resources-about-sex/

https://www.cdc.gov/healthy-youth-parent-resources/conversation-tips/index.html

https://parentandteen.com/help-parents-talk-comfortably-about-sex/


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]]> In this episode, Amanda and Kyle are joined by Marian, a sexual health and pleasure educator, for a powerful conversation about breaking cycles of shame and stigma. Marian shares her positive experience growing up in a family where vulnerability, honesty, and support were the norm when it came to tough topics like sex.

Together, they explore the stark contrast between Marian’s upbringing and Amanda’s experience in the oppressive purity culture of the cult. They dive into what it means to pass down healing, not shame, to the next generation and how parents can foster openness and healthy communication about sexuality.

They also tackle a listener question about how to talk to kids and teens about sex in an approachable and affirming way, offering practical advice for creating safe spaces for these important conversations.

Plus, Amanda and Kyle share details about some exciting upcoming episodes, including the incredible guests and thought-provoking topics you won’t want to miss. This is a must-listen for anyone interested in promoting sexual health, breaking generational cycles, and embracing honest, healing conversations.

Resources:

https://thepleasureproject.org/the-pleasure-principles/

https://parentandteen.com/resources-about-sex/

https://www.cdc.gov/healthy-youth-parent-resources/conversation-tips/index.html

https://parentandteen.com/help-parents-talk-comfortably-about-sex/


Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16416904 Mon, 13 Jan 2025 00:00:00 -0500 3503 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sexual Health, Sexuality, Generational Cycles 1 69 full true 68 - Wrapping Up & Moving Forward 68 - Wrapping Up & Moving Forward Amanda and Kyle reflect on an incredible year of connection and growth and share their heartfelt gratitude for the listeners who’ve supported the show. From messages and comments to thoughtful questions, your voices have made this journey meaningful. Amanda and Kyle also drop some news about exciting episodes coming in January to kick off the new year! As the holiday season approaches, Amanda shares a gentle reminder to prioritize emotional safety, mental health, and self-compassion. The podcast will take a short two-week break, but Amanda and Kyle can’t wait to return in January, refreshed and ready for what’s next. Thanks for being part of this community, and happy holidays!

Support the show

]]> Amanda and Kyle reflect on an incredible year of connection and growth and share their heartfelt gratitude for the listeners who’ve supported the show. From messages and comments to thoughtful questions, your voices have made this journey meaningful. Amanda and Kyle also drop some news about exciting episodes coming in January to kick off the new year! As the holiday season approaches, Amanda shares a gentle reminder to prioritize emotional safety, mental health, and self-compassion. The podcast will take a short two-week break, but Amanda and Kyle can’t wait to return in January, refreshed and ready for what’s next. Thanks for being part of this community, and happy holidays!

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16326163 Mon, 23 Dec 2024 00:00:00 -0500 699 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Christmas, New Year, Holidays 1 68 full false 67 - A Forced Apology 67 - A Forced Apology Amanda shares a pivotal moment from her childhood: being made to apologize to the person who raped her. She and Kyle discuss the circumstances that led to this event, the family and cult factors at play, and how the experience continues to affect Amanda today. Together, they explore the long-term implications of spiritual manipulation and abuse. 

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]]> Amanda shares a pivotal moment from her childhood: being made to apologize to the person who raped her. She and Kyle discuss the circumstances that led to this event, the family and cult factors at play, and how the experience continues to affect Amanda today. Together, they explore the long-term implications of spiritual manipulation and abuse. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16283955 Mon, 16 Dec 2024 00:00:00 -0500 1884 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sexual Assault 1 67 full true 66 - Defying Gravity and Cults 66 - Defying Gravity and Cults In this heartfelt and personal episode, Amanda opens up about the unexpected role the musical Wicked played in her journey of leaving the IBLP cult and rediscovering herself. From its powerful themes of challenging authority to embracing individuality, Amanda shares how the story of Elphaba’s courage and defiance resonated deeply during her deconstruction and healing process. With raw vulnerability, she recounts the moments when Wicked’s music and lyrics felt like a lifeline, inspiring her to “defy gravity” and chart a new path. Whether you’re a fan of Broadway or navigating your own personal struggles, this episode is a reminder that even the most unexpected things—like a stage musical—can be a source of hope and strength. Tune in to hear Amanda’s reflections, her favorite songs from the show, and why Wicked remains a meaningful part of her story.

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]]> In this heartfelt and personal episode, Amanda opens up about the unexpected role the musical Wicked played in her journey of leaving the IBLP cult and rediscovering herself. From its powerful themes of challenging authority to embracing individuality, Amanda shares how the story of Elphaba’s courage and defiance resonated deeply during her deconstruction and healing process. With raw vulnerability, she recounts the moments when Wicked’s music and lyrics felt like a lifeline, inspiring her to “defy gravity” and chart a new path. Whether you’re a fan of Broadway or navigating your own personal struggles, this episode is a reminder that even the most unexpected things—like a stage musical—can be a source of hope and strength. Tune in to hear Amanda’s reflections, her favorite songs from the show, and why Wicked remains a meaningful part of her story.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16243380 Mon, 09 Dec 2024 00:00:00 -0500 2307 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Wicked, Broadway, Music 1 66 full true 65 - Amanda's Post-Cult Dating Adventure 65 - Amanda's Post-Cult Dating Adventure Amanda finally shares some of her dating history post-cult, pre-Kyle. Stories include the Taco Bell incident (Kyle's favorite), trad-wife-seeking encounters, insurance scammers, and that one time Amanda asked a guy out (see social media for the whole story). Also, as a public health professional, Amanda is very proud of how she handled the sexual aspect of her dating history. ;)

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]]> Amanda finally shares some of her dating history post-cult, pre-Kyle. Stories include the Taco Bell incident (Kyle's favorite), trad-wife-seeking encounters, insurance scammers, and that one time Amanda asked a guy out (see social media for the whole story). Also, as a public health professional, Amanda is very proud of how she handled the sexual aspect of her dating history. ;)

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16203976 Mon, 02 Dec 2024 00:00:00 -0500 2814 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Marriage, Sex, Dating, Trad Wife 1 65 full true 64 - Happy Thanksgiving & Exciting Announcement! 64 - Happy Thanksgiving & Exciting Announcement! Join us for a quick Thanksgiving episode and special announcement! Kyle shares his family's special Thanksgiving meal tradition and Amanda shares some memories of Thanksgivings from her childhood. For all of our listeners with tough family situations this holiday season, we send you love and a reminder that you are worthy, your boundaries are important, and you always have community here with us. Happy Thanksgiving!  

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]]> Join us for a quick Thanksgiving episode and special announcement! Kyle shares his family's special Thanksgiving meal tradition and Amanda shares some memories of Thanksgivings from her childhood. For all of our listeners with tough family situations this holiday season, we send you love and a reminder that you are worthy, your boundaries are important, and you always have community here with us. Happy Thanksgiving!  

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16166996 Mon, 25 Nov 2024 00:00:00 -0500 613 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Thanksgiving, Friendsgiving, Holidays 1 64 full false 63 - You Asked, We Answered 63 - You Asked, We Answered Amanda and Kyle respond to listener questions about head coverings, cult practices around the Sabbath, if Amanda thinks her boldness and intelligence caused her to be targeted for abuse as she grew up in the IBLP cult, and how Amanda thinks sexual abuse against one of her brothers would have been handled versus how it was handled for her as a girl. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle respond to listener questions about head coverings, cult practices around the Sabbath, if Amanda thinks her boldness and intelligence caused her to be targeted for abuse as she grew up in the IBLP cult, and how Amanda thinks sexual abuse against one of her brothers would have been handled versus how it was handled for her as a girl. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16123456 Mon, 18 Nov 2024 00:00:00 -0500 1973 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sexual Abuse, Patriarchy, Family, Parents, Siblings 1 63 full true 62 - Elections and Cults 62 - Elections and Cults What do Cabbage Patch Kids and the 2024 election in the US have in common? A lot, as it turns out. This episode was recorded in response to a poll posted on social media asking listeners to share topics they would like to hear in an episode. Amanda and Kyle discuss correlations between Bill Gothard and Trump/Vance.

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]]> What do Cabbage Patch Kids and the 2024 election in the US have in common? A lot, as it turns out. This episode was recorded in response to a poll posted on social media asking listeners to share topics they would like to hear in an episode. Amanda and Kyle discuss correlations between Bill Gothard and Trump/Vance.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16080846 Mon, 11 Nov 2024 00:00:00 -0500 2368 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, True Cult, Spiritual Abuse, Donald Trump, JD Vance, Elections, Supreme Court, Joshua Generation, Christian Nationalism 1 62 full true 61 - Kyle and Sex 61 - Kyle and Sex Kyle is in the hot seat sharing his background in the Christian church, his thoughts about purity culture as a young adult, and the way he handled sex and relationships as someone who attended Baptist church. Amanda learns a shocking revelation about Kyle's past. Kyle shares his deconstruction story and his eventual departure from Christianity. Jump in the comments and convince Kyle to share photos of his high school hairstyle on our social media channel. 

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]]> Kyle is in the hot seat sharing his background in the Christian church, his thoughts about purity culture as a young adult, and the way he handled sex and relationships as someone who attended Baptist church. Amanda learns a shocking revelation about Kyle's past. Kyle shares his deconstruction story and his eventual departure from Christianity. Jump in the comments and convince Kyle to share photos of his high school hairstyle on our social media channel. 

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]]> Buzzsprout-16042025 Mon, 04 Nov 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3919 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Marriage, Sex, Dating, Church 1 61 full true 60 - Deconstruction 60 - Deconstruction Amanda shares her deconstruction journey, which began a decade ago when she was a worship leader for a church. That was awkward. She talks through attending seminary after Bible college and her process of realizing there were aspects of Christianity and religion that were irreconcilable with logic, in her opinion. Kyle accidentally lands in the hot seat when revealing parts of his deconstruction experience, so more to come on this topic for sure! 

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]]> Amanda shares her deconstruction journey, which began a decade ago when she was a worship leader for a church. That was awkward. She talks through attending seminary after Bible college and her process of realizing there were aspects of Christianity and religion that were irreconcilable with logic, in her opinion. Kyle accidentally lands in the hot seat when revealing parts of his deconstruction experience, so more to come on this topic for sure! 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-16000604 Mon, 28 Oct 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3609 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Dating, Church, Religion 1 60 full true 59 - The Story of Us 59 - The Story of Us Following up on the marriage purposes series, Amanda and Kyle share their non-courtship story that basically ignored all of Bill's relationship guidelines. However, Kyle almost followed purity culture with room for the Holy Spirit for a whole lotta dates. Amanda will never let him live it down. They compare Bill's marriage principles to the insights of an actual therapist who, you know, is trained in these matters, and Kyle reports on the results of travel-enforced abstinence--in case you were wondering how Bill's marriage rules work out in the real world. 

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]]> Following up on the marriage purposes series, Amanda and Kyle share their non-courtship story that basically ignored all of Bill's relationship guidelines. However, Kyle almost followed purity culture with room for the Holy Spirit for a whole lotta dates. Amanda will never let him live it down. They compare Bill's marriage principles to the insights of an actual therapist who, you know, is trained in these matters, and Kyle reports on the results of travel-enforced abstinence--in case you were wondering how Bill's marriage rules work out in the real world. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15959864 Mon, 21 Oct 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3539 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Marriage, Sex, Dating 1 59 full true 58 - Coming Home 58 - Coming Home Amanda flies solo for another episode. This time, she shares about her journey out of a very checked out or dissociative state and home to her own body, mind, and emotions. Amanda went on this journey as she left the cult and began abuse recovery, and also more recently. She shares the ups and downs of the process, including the discomfort of checking back into your own life and becoming aware of issues that exist there as well as the joy of getting to know yourself for the first time. In the end, she finds her way home. 

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]]> Amanda flies solo for another episode. This time, she shares about her journey out of a very checked out or dissociative state and home to her own body, mind, and emotions. Amanda went on this journey as she left the cult and began abuse recovery, and also more recently. She shares the ups and downs of the process, including the discomfort of checking back into your own life and becoming aware of issues that exist there as well as the joy of getting to know yourself for the first time. In the end, she finds her way home. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15919010 Mon, 14 Oct 2024 00:00:00 -0400 1510 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Abuse, Dissociation, Family, Friends, Home 1 58 full true 57 - On a Journey to Trust 57 - On a Journey to Trust Amanda and Kyle are joined by a special guest! Skye's story caught our attention right away—her mother, the owner of an adult toy business, sent her to a fundamentalist Christian elementary school WAIT WHAT?! The part about her mom’s business is a great story and will make you chuckle, but unfortunately, this school is also where Skye first experienced grooming. It was also at this school, at just seven years old, she was told Satan was living in her heart, sparking a deconstruction journey that began decades before, well, many of us. In this episode, Skye delivers a powerful message on the importance of listening to children when they express discomfort, how naivety can make individuals more vulnerable to grooming, and the crucial role of believing and protecting survivors from further harm. She also opens up about her own journey to heal and reclaim her ability to trust and find goodness in others, even those with differing beliefs.

Topic warning: Grooming, rape, biphobia 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle are joined by a special guest! Skye's story caught our attention right away—her mother, the owner of an adult toy business, sent her to a fundamentalist Christian elementary school WAIT WHAT?! The part about her mom’s business is a great story and will make you chuckle, but unfortunately, this school is also where Skye first experienced grooming. It was also at this school, at just seven years old, she was told Satan was living in her heart, sparking a deconstruction journey that began decades before, well, many of us. In this episode, Skye delivers a powerful message on the importance of listening to children when they express discomfort, how naivety can make individuals more vulnerable to grooming, and the crucial role of believing and protecting survivors from further harm. She also opens up about her own journey to heal and reclaim her ability to trust and find goodness in others, even those with differing beliefs.

Topic warning: Grooming, rape, biphobia 

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]]> Buzzsprout-15879685 Mon, 07 Oct 2024 00:00:00 -0400 4628 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Sex, Adult Toys, School, Education 1 57 full true 56 - In Which Amanda Tries to Convince Kyle to Try Bill's Abstinence Program for Science 56 - In Which Amanda Tries to Convince Kyle to Try Bill's Abstinence Program for Science We reach the end of our Six Purposes of Marriage journey! Amanda and Kyle procrastinate and talk about a lot of other things, including how the violin is the most righteous instrument, before diving into Bill Gothard’s strange teachings about what marriage “illustrates.” Amanda and Kyle recap the purpose of marriage in the IBLP cult, which is basically about abstinence and the menstrual cycle, and Amanda gets the brilliant idea to try Bill’s abstinence program for science and report back on its marital impacts. Kyle proves difficult to convince. Amanda's story about being asked to perform music for a mass wedding ceremony to Jesus gets honorable mention. 

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]]> We reach the end of our Six Purposes of Marriage journey! Amanda and Kyle procrastinate and talk about a lot of other things, including how the violin is the most righteous instrument, before diving into Bill Gothard’s strange teachings about what marriage “illustrates.” Amanda and Kyle recap the purpose of marriage in the IBLP cult, which is basically about abstinence and the menstrual cycle, and Amanda gets the brilliant idea to try Bill’s abstinence program for science and report back on its marital impacts. Kyle proves difficult to convince. Amanda's story about being asked to perform music for a mass wedding ceremony to Jesus gets honorable mention. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15838073 Mon, 30 Sep 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2359 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couples, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sex, Marriage, Sex Life 1 56 full true 55 - Protection of the...Seed? 55 - Protection of the...Seed? Mothers aren't protective. Divorce taints godly seed. A woman finally matters because she made a lot of kids who went and did church work. We talk about these topics and many other confusing aspects of Bill Gothard's teachings about pure Christian family lines. Amanda and Kyle also answer listener questions about beliefs in the cult regarding doctors/medical intervention/vaccines as well as a cult-adjacent program called "Bright Lights."

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]]> Mothers aren't protective. Divorce taints godly seed. A woman finally matters because she made a lot of kids who went and did church work. We talk about these topics and many other confusing aspects of Bill Gothard's teachings about pure Christian family lines. Amanda and Kyle also answer listener questions about beliefs in the cult regarding doctors/medical intervention/vaccines as well as a cult-adjacent program called "Bright Lights."

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]]> Buzzsprout-15797736 Mon, 23 Sep 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2237 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sex, Marriage, Reproduction 1 55 full true 54 - Be Fruitful and Multiply...Like, a Lot 54 - Be Fruitful and Multiply...Like, a Lot Amanda and Kyle discuss the IBLP cult's stance on how a godly couple goes about family planning...or doesn't, because God will plan your family. We learn things like the role of proper music and abstinence in conception, the many "hidden designs" in the Bible, and how the pull out method of birth control can get you killed. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle discuss the IBLP cult's stance on how a godly couple goes about family planning...or doesn't, because God will plan your family. We learn things like the role of proper music and abstinence in conception, the many "hidden designs" in the Bible, and how the pull out method of birth control can get you killed. 

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]]> Buzzsprout-15758073 Mon, 16 Sep 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3049 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Marriage, Sex, Family Planning 1 54 full true 53 - The Six Purposes of Marriage: Completeness 53 - The Six Purposes of Marriage: Completeness As Kyle puts it, this episode is all about "connecting with your spouse through abstinence." Join us as we talk about Bill Gothard's view on completeness in marriage and how not eating and not having sex play a big role. We also answer some listener questions about how to talk to people you know who are still in a cult, why the word "encouragement" was such a popular adjective for women in the cult, how the cult viewed salvation and if you could lose it, the Cook County States Attorney who was in office during the case against Amanda's brother, and programs men in the cult used for accountability. Kyle asks Amanda his own question about how the IBLP cult viewed the book of Revelations and the end times and gets a pretty gruesome response that reminds Amanda why she needed so much therapy as an adult. 

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]]> As Kyle puts it, this episode is all about "connecting with your spouse through abstinence." Join us as we talk about Bill Gothard's view on completeness in marriage and how not eating and not having sex play a big role. We also answer some listener questions about how to talk to people you know who are still in a cult, why the word "encouragement" was such a popular adjective for women in the cult, how the cult viewed salvation and if you could lose it, the Cook County States Attorney who was in office during the case against Amanda's brother, and programs men in the cult used for accountability. Kyle asks Amanda his own question about how the IBLP cult viewed the book of Revelations and the end times and gets a pretty gruesome response that reminds Amanda why she needed so much therapy as an adult. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15716789 Mon, 09 Sep 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2163 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Abuse, Mental Health, Sex, Marriage 1 53 full true One Year Message from Amanda & Kyle One Year Message from Amanda & Kyle To celebrate the one-year anniversary of The Cult I Left Behind podcast, Amanda and Kyle share their favorite moments, favorite episodes, insights into the creation of episodes, and their deep appreciate for the community that has formed around this podcast. 

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]]> To celebrate the one-year anniversary of The Cult I Left Behind podcast, Amanda and Kyle share their favorite moments, favorite episodes, insights into the creation of episodes, and their deep appreciate for the community that has formed around this podcast. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15692629 Wed, 04 Sep 2024 00:00:00 -0400 1290 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sex, Marriage bonus false 52 - The Six Purposes of Marriage: Pleasure 52 - The Six Purposes of Marriage: Pleasure Let’s talk about sex…again! Amanda and Kyle talk through Bill Gothard’s teaching on pleasure in the marriage relationship. In a shocking turn of events (haha), everything revolves around the menstrual cycle. It turns out abstinence plays a big role in marriage pleasure, as well as in healing all manner of physical ailments. All of this wise relationship and sex advice from Bill, a man who was never married and who was a sexual predator. Definitely words to live by. 

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]]> Let’s talk about sex…again! Amanda and Kyle talk through Bill Gothard’s teaching on pleasure in the marriage relationship. In a shocking turn of events (haha), everything revolves around the menstrual cycle. It turns out abstinence plays a big role in marriage pleasure, as well as in healing all manner of physical ailments. All of this wise relationship and sex advice from Bill, a man who was never married and who was a sexual predator. Definitely words to live by. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15679140 Mon, 02 Sep 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3299 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Marriage, Sex 1 52 full true 51 - The Six Purposes of Marriage: Companionship 51 - The Six Purposes of Marriage: Companionship Did you know companionship in marriage is really about the menstrual cycle? Did you also know you’re in a covenant relationships with everyone with whom you’ve shared a meal? And that abstinence is important in marriage? Neither did we. But this is what we learn about in the IBLP Advanced Seminar materials. We also learn more about Bill Gothard’s sex rules for married couples. They’re super weird. Amanda shares an interesting message from a listener regarding the recent courtship episodes, and Amanda and Kyle answer a few listener questions…including a question about their Hogwarts houses. 

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]]> Did you know companionship in marriage is really about the menstrual cycle? Did you also know you’re in a covenant relationships with everyone with whom you’ve shared a meal? And that abstinence is important in marriage? Neither did we. But this is what we learn about in the IBLP Advanced Seminar materials. We also learn more about Bill Gothard’s sex rules for married couples. They’re super weird. Amanda shares an interesting message from a listener regarding the recent courtship episodes, and Amanda and Kyle answer a few listener questions…including a question about their Hogwarts houses. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15639102 Mon, 26 Aug 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2298 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Relationships, Marriage, Sex 1 51 full true 50 - The Seven Phases of a Godly Courtship Part 2 50 - The Seven Phases of a Godly Courtship Part 2 Time to wrap up how to go about courting in the holiest manner possible. Amanda tells Kyle the final steps to a godly pre-marriage relationship. Kyle is confused. We learn why Ruth is way more chaste and holy than other female Bible characters, Amanda's Bible college and seminary training pays off, and Kyle issues a complaint with the way IBLP uses the word "purpose." 

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]]> Time to wrap up how to go about courting in the holiest manner possible. Amanda tells Kyle the final steps to a godly pre-marriage relationship. Kyle is confused. We learn why Ruth is way more chaste and holy than other female Bible characters, Amanda's Bible college and seminary training pays off, and Kyle issues a complaint with the way IBLP uses the word "purpose." 

Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-15600148 Mon, 19 Aug 2024 00:00:00 -0400 1758 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Courtship, Dating, Marriage, Relationships, Sex 1 50 full true 49 - The Seven Phases of a Godly Courtship 49 - The Seven Phases of a Godly Courtship Amanda and Kyle embark on a perilous journey through more cult ideology around dating, sex, marriage, and purity. Bill's vision (for everyone except himself and his brothers) involves some pretty steep expectations of young men that are, dare we say, impossible in 2024. Young women fare much better under Bill's system in that they aren't supposed to do anything but be quiet, grateful, and without expectations. All of this ideology is straight out of the Advanced Seminar, and we do not recommend it unless you like oppression.



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]]> Amanda and Kyle embark on a perilous journey through more cult ideology around dating, sex, marriage, and purity. Bill's vision (for everyone except himself and his brothers) involves some pretty steep expectations of young men that are, dare we say, impossible in 2024. Young women fare much better under Bill's system in that they aren't supposed to do anything but be quiet, grateful, and without expectations. All of this ideology is straight out of the Advanced Seminar, and we do not recommend it unless you like oppression.



Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-15567434 Mon, 12 Aug 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2388 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Courtship, Dating, Marriage, Sex 1 49 full true 48 - A State Prosecutor's Perspective on Amanda's Case 48 - A State Prosecutor's Perspective on Amanda's Case A special guest joins us to discuss the case against Amanda's brother. Jennifer, an Assistant District Attorney and podcast listener, prosecutes sexual assault cases in her state and has some interesting thoughts on Amanda's experience as a witness, the politics that impacted the case against her brother, and the legal outcome of the case. Amanda, Kyle, and Jennifer have a heartfelt conversation about the impact of the legal process on sexual assault survivors, the innovative support systems available to survivors who report, and the importance of believing survivors. Jennifer also explains how she builds rapport with survivors, prepares them for court, and selects a jury. We laughed and cried our way through this episode, and we hope you find it as meaningful to listen to as we did to record it.

National Child Advocacy Center

https://www.nationalcac.org/

Angel House, Alabama

https://vocalonline.org/angel-house/

One Place Family Justice Center

https://www.oneplacefjc.org/

 The HERO program

https://opsheroinfo.org/

Southeast Alabama Child Advocacy Center

https://www.southeastcac.org/

 

Support the show

]]> A special guest joins us to discuss the case against Amanda's brother. Jennifer, an Assistant District Attorney and podcast listener, prosecutes sexual assault cases in her state and has some interesting thoughts on Amanda's experience as a witness, the politics that impacted the case against her brother, and the legal outcome of the case. Amanda, Kyle, and Jennifer have a heartfelt conversation about the impact of the legal process on sexual assault survivors, the innovative support systems available to survivors who report, and the importance of believing survivors. Jennifer also explains how she builds rapport with survivors, prepares them for court, and selects a jury. We laughed and cried our way through this episode, and we hope you find it as meaningful to listen to as we did to record it.

National Child Advocacy Center

https://www.nationalcac.org/

Angel House, Alabama

https://vocalonline.org/angel-house/

One Place Family Justice Center

https://www.oneplacefjc.org/

 The HERO program

https://opsheroinfo.org/

Southeast Alabama Child Advocacy Center

https://www.southeastcac.org/

 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15529762 Mon, 05 Aug 2024 00:00:00 -0400 5390 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Crime, Legal, True Crime 1 48 full true 47 - Development of an Immoral Woman 47 - Development of an Immoral Woman Amanda and Kyle discuss the IBLP Advanced Seminar seven-step chart about how a woman becomes immoral. Obviously, this is all “supported” by random verses from the King James Version of the Christian Bible. So, normal cult stuff. Amanda shares her childhood judgement of females who wore clothes that actually fit (so immoral) and her fear of becoming a Strange Woman. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle discuss the IBLP Advanced Seminar seven-step chart about how a woman becomes immoral. Obviously, this is all “supported” by random verses from the King James Version of the Christian Bible. So, normal cult stuff. Amanda shares her childhood judgement of females who wore clothes that actually fit (so immoral) and her fear of becoming a Strange Woman. 

Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-15489480 Mon, 29 Jul 2024 00:00:00 -0400 1505 1 47 full true 46 - Courtship and the Ten Unchangeables 46 - Courtship and the Ten Unchangeables The Ten Unchangeables make a reappearance in the courtship process. The IBLP Advanced Seminar Textbook lays out intense instructions for how to interrogate a potential romantic partner. Kyle is incredulous, Amanda is shocked he's still shocked by cult material, and much laughter ensues. 

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]]> The Ten Unchangeables make a reappearance in the courtship process. The IBLP Advanced Seminar Textbook lays out intense instructions for how to interrogate a potential romantic partner. Kyle is incredulous, Amanda is shocked he's still shocked by cult material, and much laughter ensues. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15449638 Mon, 22 Jul 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2298 1 46 full true 45 - Applying Levels of Friendship to Dating 45 - Applying Levels of Friendship to Dating In the next installment of courtship in the cult, Amanda tells Kyle all about the IBLP Basic and Advanced Training Seminar's instruction regarding the four levels of friendship and how they govern dating or courtship relationships. 

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]]> In the next installment of courtship in the cult, Amanda tells Kyle all about the IBLP Basic and Advanced Training Seminar's instruction regarding the four levels of friendship and how they govern dating or courtship relationships. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15412795 Mon, 15 Jul 2024 00:00:00 -0400 1697 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Courtship, Dating, Marriage, Sex 1 45 full true 44 - Amanda's Courtship Story 44 - Amanda's Courtship Story Amanda shares her own courtship experience and the ill-fated romance that followed. She explains purity culture concepts such as "giving away your heart," being a "chewed up piece of gum," and being a "trampled garden." Amanda and Kyle discuss how Amanda's ex found out about her childhood abuse and how that information impacted their relationship, and Amanda explains to Kyle how the IBLP cult taught that women were more adversely affected by sex outside of marriage than men.


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]]> Amanda shares her own courtship experience and the ill-fated romance that followed. She explains purity culture concepts such as "giving away your heart," being a "chewed up piece of gum," and being a "trampled garden." Amanda and Kyle discuss how Amanda's ex found out about her childhood abuse and how that information impacted their relationship, and Amanda explains to Kyle how the IBLP cult taught that women were more adversely affected by sex outside of marriage than men.


Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-15375475 Mon, 08 Jul 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3403 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Courtship, Dating, Marriage, Sex, Pregnancy 1 44 full true 43 - Courtship in the Cult 43 - Courtship in the Cult A conversation Amanda has put off for a long time plays out amid trauma laughs, real laughs, and incredulity (on Kyle's part). Join us for a conversation about an IBLP cult staple: courtship. Presented as an alternative to "secular dating," courtship is Bill Gothard's highly controlled and supposedly impeccable standard for relationships. Amanda and Kyle talk about the espionage inherent in the courtship process, Old Testament stories taken literally and implemented, the complete disregard for holistic attraction, and—of course—how men were in charge of the entire process and the young woman being courted had very little to no say over her relationship. It's a ride; thanks for going on it with us. 


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]]> A conversation Amanda has put off for a long time plays out amid trauma laughs, real laughs, and incredulity (on Kyle's part). Join us for a conversation about an IBLP cult staple: courtship. Presented as an alternative to "secular dating," courtship is Bill Gothard's highly controlled and supposedly impeccable standard for relationships. Amanda and Kyle talk about the espionage inherent in the courtship process, Old Testament stories taken literally and implemented, the complete disregard for holistic attraction, and—of course—how men were in charge of the entire process and the young woman being courted had very little to no say over her relationship. It's a ride; thanks for going on it with us. 


Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-15337685 Mon, 01 Jul 2024 00:00:00 -0400 4260 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Courtship, Dating, Marriage, Sex 1 43 full true 42 - Don't Get Locked Out 42 - Don't Get Locked Out Amanda and Kyle are reunited for another episode! They answer some listener questions, then Kyle asks Amanda about something she mentioned in passing that startled him and required further investigation. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle are reunited for another episode! They answer some listener questions, then Kyle asks Amanda about something she mentioned in passing that startled him and required further investigation. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15299254 Mon, 24 Jun 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3154 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Homeschooling 1 42 full true 41 - Wisdom Booklet #1 41 - Wisdom Booklet #1 What do Celine Dion and Wisdom Booklet #1 have in common? Well, it's all coming back to me now as Amanda and Kyle go down the rabbit hole (or up the mountain?) into the world of ATI where male supremacy makes an immediate appearance. Listen along as Kyle reacquaints Amanda with the concepts of the cult's flagship homeschooling curriculum. And if you were ever curious as to why Christians should learn math, Wisdom Booklet #1 is here to answer that burning question for you. Welcome to Amanda's personal educational hell. Enjoy. 

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]]> What do Celine Dion and Wisdom Booklet #1 have in common? Well, it's all coming back to me now as Amanda and Kyle go down the rabbit hole (or up the mountain?) into the world of ATI where male supremacy makes an immediate appearance. Listen along as Kyle reacquaints Amanda with the concepts of the cult's flagship homeschooling curriculum. And if you were ever curious as to why Christians should learn math, Wisdom Booklet #1 is here to answer that burning question for you. Welcome to Amanda's personal educational hell. Enjoy. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15260267 Mon, 17 Jun 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3153 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, STEM, Education, School 1 41 full true 40 - The Music that Saved Me 40 - The Music that Saved Me In the most vulnerable episode to date, Amanda shares her songwriting diary and describes how the music helped her cope with reporting her brother, losing her biological family, going through a divorce, struggling with her mental health, and, ultimately, finding hope, love, and joy in life. 

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]]> In the most vulnerable episode to date, Amanda shares her songwriting diary and describes how the music helped her cope with reporting her brother, losing her biological family, going through a divorce, struggling with her mental health, and, ultimately, finding hope, love, and joy in life. 

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]]> Buzzsprout-15220836 Mon, 10 Jun 2024 00:00:00 -0400 5145 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Music, Songwriting, Singer 1 40 full true 39 - The Halls of Satan 39 - The Halls of Satan Kyle teaches Amanda about the experience of growing up in public school. It all started over a dinner date conversation that resulted in running back to the Airbnb to record Amanda's questions/shock/terror about "evil public school." The IBLP cult taught that public school was immoral, so Amanda had a lot to learn about the concept of public education in general. Additionally, Amanda and Kyle answer a listener question about if they would still be in Christian church if they had a different experience growing up. 

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]]> Kyle teaches Amanda about the experience of growing up in public school. It all started over a dinner date conversation that resulted in running back to the Airbnb to record Amanda's questions/shock/terror about "evil public school." The IBLP cult taught that public school was immoral, so Amanda had a lot to learn about the concept of public education in general. Additionally, Amanda and Kyle answer a listener question about if they would still be in Christian church if they had a different experience growing up. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15181065 Mon, 03 Jun 2024 00:00:00 -0400 4598 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Children, Adoption, Public School, Education 1 39 full true 38 - Q&A Session #3 38 - Q&A Session #3 Coming to you live from the middle of a cross-country move, Amanda and Kyle answer more listener questions. They discuss the impact of cults/trauma/sexual assault/sin on health, and Amanda shares how she overcame her IBLP cult-induced beliefs that her medical struggles were punishment from God. Amanda also recommends some books written by people who left other cults.

Books:
Uncultured
Educated
A Billion Years

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]]> Coming to you live from the middle of a cross-country move, Amanda and Kyle answer more listener questions. They discuss the impact of cults/trauma/sexual assault/sin on health, and Amanda shares how she overcame her IBLP cult-induced beliefs that her medical struggles were punishment from God. Amanda also recommends some books written by people who left other cults.

Books:
Uncultured
Educated
A Billion Years

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15139766 Mon, 27 May 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2137 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschool, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, Trauma, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sexual Assault, Medical, Books 1 38 full true 37 - No Sex on Saturdays! 37 - No Sex on Saturdays! Thanks to some help from a listener, Amanda and Kyle finally tackle their long-awaited topic: Bill Gothard's teachings on sex rules in marriage! To absolutely nobody's surprise, the IBLP cult has a lot to say (ahem, dictate) about how married people go about their sexual relationship -- including days they should not have sex. Amanda and Kyle also answer a listener question about how to be authentic and true to yourself as a non-Christian with many friends and family members who are devout Christians.

Links to articles mentioned in the episode:
G. Richard Fisher article
Patheos blog post

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]]> Thanks to some help from a listener, Amanda and Kyle finally tackle their long-awaited topic: Bill Gothard's teachings on sex rules in marriage! To absolutely nobody's surprise, the IBLP cult has a lot to say (ahem, dictate) about how married people go about their sexual relationship -- including days they should not have sex. Amanda and Kyle also answer a listener question about how to be authentic and true to yourself as a non-Christian with many friends and family members who are devout Christians.

Links to articles mentioned in the episode:
G. Richard Fisher article
Patheos blog post

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15098366 Mon, 20 May 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3264 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Marriage, Relationships, Sex 1 37 full true 36 - I Hate Mother's Day 36 - I Hate Mother's Day In an angsty and emotional conversation, Amanda tells Kyle about the complexity of Mother's Day with an abusive mother. Amanda shares how the IBLP cult enabled parental abuse and what it’s like to cut ties with abusive parents. 

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]]> In an angsty and emotional conversation, Amanda tells Kyle about the complexity of Mother's Day with an abusive mother. Amanda shares how the IBLP cult enabled parental abuse and what it’s like to cut ties with abusive parents. 

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]]> Buzzsprout-15056702 Mon, 13 May 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2840 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Mother's Day, Children, Parents, Family 1 36 full true 35 - Adoption and the Sins of the Father 35 - Adoption and the Sins of the Father Amanda tells Kyle about Bill Gothard's teachings on adoption. It turns out adoption is considered a medical situation. It also turns out couples who can't have biological children shouldn't adopt because, according to Bill, God doesn't think they should be parents. Amanda explains the concept of "sins of the father" and how Bill taught adopted kids brought the sins of their lineage into their adoptive families. Amanda and Kyle discuss how Bill found every conceivable way to exert power and control over IBLP cult members and what Amanda left behind from cult ideology around adoption. 

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]]> Amanda tells Kyle about Bill Gothard's teachings on adoption. It turns out adoption is considered a medical situation. It also turns out couples who can't have biological children shouldn't adopt because, according to Bill, God doesn't think they should be parents. Amanda explains the concept of "sins of the father" and how Bill taught adopted kids brought the sins of their lineage into their adoptive families. Amanda and Kyle discuss how Bill found every conceivable way to exert power and control over IBLP cult members and what Amanda left behind from cult ideology around adoption. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-15014495 Mon, 06 May 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2400 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Adoption, Family, Children 1 35 full true 34 - What If I'm Weird? 34 - What If I'm Weird? Amanda and Kyle discuss what it's like to leave a cult and be that "weird" person trying to navigate the real world. Amanda shares the hurdles she faced as a weird person after leaving the IBLP cult, the process of recognizing she was different than those around her, and how she made non-cult friends. Amanda and Kyle talk through the challenges of assimilating to society after leaving a repressive environment, and Amanda shares lessons learned along the way to embracing her past and her weirdness. They also discuss helpful ways "normal" folks can react to folks who grew up in oppressive or repressive environments and might struggle socially. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle discuss what it's like to leave a cult and be that "weird" person trying to navigate the real world. Amanda shares the hurdles she faced as a weird person after leaving the IBLP cult, the process of recognizing she was different than those around her, and how she made non-cult friends. Amanda and Kyle talk through the challenges of assimilating to society after leaving a repressive environment, and Amanda shares lessons learned along the way to embracing her past and her weirdness. They also discuss helpful ways "normal" folks can react to folks who grew up in oppressive or repressive environments and might struggle socially. 

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]]> Buzzsprout-14972252 Mon, 29 Apr 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3445 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Relationships, Friendship, College, Military 1 34 full true 33 - Let's Talk About Sex 33 - Let's Talk About Sex Amanda and Kyle respond to many listener questions about reaching a healthy sex life after experiencing sexual trauma in or outside a cult. They discuss different therapy modalities that helped Amanda heal, why females in the IBLP cult dissociated from their bodies, and why distance from harmful people helps the healing process.

Amanda mentions Rosen therapy for somatic healing. If you are interested, you can check out the Rosen Institute’s website to learn more and see if there is a practitioner near you. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle respond to many listener questions about reaching a healthy sex life after experiencing sexual trauma in or outside a cult. They discuss different therapy modalities that helped Amanda heal, why females in the IBLP cult dissociated from their bodies, and why distance from harmful people helps the healing process.

Amanda mentions Rosen therapy for somatic healing. If you are interested, you can check out the Rosen Institute’s website to learn more and see if there is a practitioner near you. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14930324 Mon, 22 Apr 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2741 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sex, Marriage, Sex Life 1 33 full true 32 - But Did You Cry Out? 32 - But Did You Cry Out? Amanda tells Kyle about Bill Gothard's made up "Law of Crying Out" which - surprise, surprise - places equal blame on victims and perpetrators. Amanda grew up being taught this ideology as part of ATI's educational curriculum and bought into it for much of her life until adulthood. She tells Kyle about the different responses humans have to crisis and assault and considers that Bill used his publications to groom his next generation of victims. Together, Amanda and Kyle discuss non-cult ideology of culpability around assault and talk about what support looks like for survivors.

Link to Amanda's book

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]]> Amanda tells Kyle about Bill Gothard's made up "Law of Crying Out" which - surprise, surprise - places equal blame on victims and perpetrators. Amanda grew up being taught this ideology as part of ATI's educational curriculum and bought into it for much of her life until adulthood. She tells Kyle about the different responses humans have to crisis and assault and considers that Bill used his publications to groom his next generation of victims. Together, Amanda and Kyle discuss non-cult ideology of culpability around assault and talk about what support looks like for survivors.

Link to Amanda's book

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14888971 Mon, 15 Apr 2024 00:00:00 -0400 3207 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Sexual Assault, Sexual Assault Awareness, Sexual Assault Awareness Month 1 32 full true 31 - The Military and the Cult 31 - The Military and the Cult Amanda shares some of the most embarrassing moments from her military career. Turns out growing up in the IBLP cult means there's a lot of slang and innuendo that goes right over your head. A best practice is probably not to repeat any new phrases until you Google them, but sadly that is not what happened. Amanda also tells Kyle about some of her greatest successes in the military and how growing up in a cult helped her cope with military training and other high-pressure environments. Kyle asks Amanda the greatest hinderance she faced as a female cult kid who went into a STEM career field in the military, and it just so happens that you really do need to know more math than fractions. But also, according to the cult, females are not supposed to be in the military. This episode (or at least the good parts of this episode) is dedicated to the men and women with whom Amanda served, will forever love, and for whom she will always be grateful. 

Correction: Amanda mentions "431 paperwork" in the episode. What she referred to is actually called AETC Form 341 . 

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]]> Amanda shares some of the most embarrassing moments from her military career. Turns out growing up in the IBLP cult means there's a lot of slang and innuendo that goes right over your head. A best practice is probably not to repeat any new phrases until you Google them, but sadly that is not what happened. Amanda also tells Kyle about some of her greatest successes in the military and how growing up in a cult helped her cope with military training and other high-pressure environments. Kyle asks Amanda the greatest hinderance she faced as a female cult kid who went into a STEM career field in the military, and it just so happens that you really do need to know more math than fractions. But also, according to the cult, females are not supposed to be in the military. This episode (or at least the good parts of this episode) is dedicated to the men and women with whom Amanda served, will forever love, and for whom she will always be grateful. 

Correction: Amanda mentions "431 paperwork" in the episode. What she referred to is actually called AETC Form 341 . 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14844120 Mon, 08 Apr 2024 00:00:00 -0400 4288 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Military, Veteran, Basic Training, STEM 1 31 full true 30 - The Ten Unchangeables 30 - The Ten Unchangeables Amanda sings a cult song from her childhood. Kyle is confused. They break down the meaning of each of the Ten Unchangeables, and IBLP word salad makes a reappearance. Amanda tells Kyle more about attending The Children's Institute for some important childhood brainwashing and why Amanda was so prepared for the military. Also: it turns out some of Bill Gothard's unchangeables can be changed. 

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]]> Amanda sings a cult song from her childhood. Kyle is confused. They break down the meaning of each of the Ten Unchangeables, and IBLP word salad makes a reappearance. Amanda tells Kyle more about attending The Children's Institute for some important childhood brainwashing and why Amanda was so prepared for the military. Also: it turns out some of Bill Gothard's unchangeables can be changed. 

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]]> Buzzsprout-14800780 Mon, 01 Apr 2024 00:00:00 -0400 2761 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Identity, Family, Culture 1 30 full true 29 - Discipline in the Cult 29 - Discipline in the Cult Blanket training, 3x training, the abusive tactics of Michael and Debi Pearl... Amanda and Kyle take an insider look at the types of discipline encouraged and endorsed by the IBLP cult. From hiding beating implements in neighborhood culverts to memorizing routes to safety, Amanda describes a childhood at the mercy of an abusive mother and her own road to recovery as an adult. 

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]]> Blanket training, 3x training, the abusive tactics of Michael and Debi Pearl... Amanda and Kyle take an insider look at the types of discipline encouraged and endorsed by the IBLP cult. From hiding beating implements in neighborhood culverts to memorizing routes to safety, Amanda describes a childhood at the mercy of an abusive mother and her own road to recovery as an adult. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14758221 Mon, 25 Mar 2024 00:00:00 -0400 4495 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Child Discipline, Abuse, Parenting 1 29 full true 28 - Q&A Session #2 28 - Q&A Session #2 Join Amanda and Kyle as they answer more listener questions and discuss issues like taking their potential future kids to church, if religions are cults for real tho, if you can accidentally become a cult leader, why Amanda’s relatives never intervened when they learned about the sexual assault, and if forming a cult to address daylight saving time is a worthy cause. Amanda shares some exciting personal news and tells the story of how she met the people she calls Mom and Dad. She also gives exact wording for how her bio relatives can go on the record in support of her. Take notes. 

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]]> Join Amanda and Kyle as they answer more listener questions and discuss issues like taking their potential future kids to church, if religions are cults for real tho, if you can accidentally become a cult leader, why Amanda’s relatives never intervened when they learned about the sexual assault, and if forming a cult to address daylight saving time is a worthy cause. Amanda shares some exciting personal news and tells the story of how she met the people she calls Mom and Dad. She also gives exact wording for how her bio relatives can go on the record in support of her. Take notes. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14705795 Mon, 18 Mar 2024 00:00:00 -0400 4063 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Family, Adoption, Theology 1 28 full true 27 - A Day in the Life of a Cult Kid 27 - A Day in the Life of a Cult Kid Amanda tells Kyle what a typical day looked like for her in the IBLP cult, complete with baking bread, caring for her younger siblings, and hiding from the police. She also talks about special circumstances, such as weekly cult gatherings and preparing to spend time around non-cult relatives and their secular influence. 

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]]> Amanda tells Kyle what a typical day looked like for her in the IBLP cult, complete with baking bread, caring for her younger siblings, and hiding from the police. She also talks about special circumstances, such as weekly cult gatherings and preparing to spend time around non-cult relatives and their secular influence. 

Support the show

]]> Buzzsprout-14665273 Mon, 11 Mar 2024 00:00:00 -0400 4174 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Church 1 27 full true 26 - Demonic Backbeats 26 - Demonic Backbeats Welcome to another analysis of crazy IBLP cult teachings! This week, we tackle Bill Gothard's Basic and Advanced Seminar materials regarding music, what is holy, what is unholy, what will definitely deform your brain cells, and what will cause your vegetables  to grow larger. Spoiler alert: most of the world is probably going to hell due to unholy taste in music. 

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]]> Welcome to another analysis of crazy IBLP cult teachings! This week, we tackle Bill Gothard's Basic and Advanced Seminar materials regarding music, what is holy, what is unholy, what will definitely deform your brain cells, and what will cause your vegetables  to grow larger. Spoiler alert: most of the world is probably going to hell due to unholy taste in music. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14619856 Mon, 04 Mar 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3258 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Music, Rock and Roll 1 26 full false 25 - MLMs and the Cult 25 - MLMs and the Cult In January, we had the opportunity to sit down with special guest Maureen Maus and talk about Multi-Level Marketing – specifically the ways their tactics overlap with cults. We also discuss how MLMs tend to target women, and often women in religious environments who must work from home. Maureen teaches us how MLMs seem to adopt spiritual language, which appeals to individuals in cults, and Amanda shares how certain leaders in the IBLP cult used their position to influence members to join an MLM. So...are MLMs cult-ish? Are they preying on women who have limited work options? Listen and let us know!

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]]> In January, we had the opportunity to sit down with special guest Maureen Maus and talk about Multi-Level Marketing – specifically the ways their tactics overlap with cults. We also discuss how MLMs tend to target women, and often women in religious environments who must work from home. Maureen teaches us how MLMs seem to adopt spiritual language, which appeals to individuals in cults, and Amanda shares how certain leaders in the IBLP cult used their position to influence members to join an MLM. So...are MLMs cult-ish? Are they preying on women who have limited work options? Listen and let us know!

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14573954 Mon, 26 Feb 2024 00:00:00 -0500 4075 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Religion, Recovery, True Cult, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health, Multi-Level Marketing, MLM 1 25 full true 24 - Eyes Down! 24 - Eyes Down! Amanda unpacks the phrase "eyes down" and its implications within her bio family and explains code word "Nike" from the Shiny Happy People docuseries. Join us for a trip down memory lane as Amanda describes battles against billboards and bikinis, tells Kyle about learning the word "sex" from a childhood friend, and shares the family rules for watching movies. 

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]]> Amanda unpacks the phrase "eyes down" and its implications within her bio family and explains code word "Nike" from the Shiny Happy People docuseries. Join us for a trip down memory lane as Amanda describes battles against billboards and bikinis, tells Kyle about learning the word "sex" from a childhood friend, and shares the family rules for watching movies. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14527570 Mon, 19 Feb 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3133 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Mental Health, Modesty 1 24 full true 23 - Will You Be My Eye Trap? 23 - Will You Be My Eye Trap? In a special episode for the week of Valentine's Day, Amanda and Kyle discuss Wisdom Booklet 15's teachings on the importance of modesty, how to avoid eye traps that might make a man lust after you and commit adultery with you in his heart, and the medical implications of immodesty and eye traps. Amanda also shares her bio mom's insight regarding the inherent evil of lingerie--even in the context of marriage. Make sure you listen to this episode because it turns out modesty is super important for your health and medical well-being. 

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]]> In a special episode for the week of Valentine's Day, Amanda and Kyle discuss Wisdom Booklet 15's teachings on the importance of modesty, how to avoid eye traps that might make a man lust after you and commit adultery with you in his heart, and the medical implications of immodesty and eye traps. Amanda also shares her bio mom's insight regarding the inherent evil of lingerie--even in the context of marriage. Make sure you listen to this episode because it turns out modesty is super important for your health and medical well-being. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14468769 Mon, 12 Feb 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3367 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, True Cult, Spiritual, Mental Health, Valentine's Day, Marriage, Dating 1 23 full true 22 - Seven Basic Needs of a Wife 22 - Seven Basic Needs of a Wife Kyle continues teaching Amanda about the Seven Basic Needs -- but this time we're looking at the wife. Shockingly (haha), her needs are a lot simpler and less taxing than the needs of a husband. The needs of a wife are not backed up by biblical text, but they sure are Duggar-approved! 

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]]> Kyle continues teaching Amanda about the Seven Basic Needs -- but this time we're looking at the wife. Shockingly (haha), her needs are a lot simpler and less taxing than the needs of a husband. The needs of a wife are not backed up by biblical text, but they sure are Duggar-approved! 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14439549 Mon, 05 Feb 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3039 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Marriage, Relationships, Husband and Wife, 1 22 full true 21 - Seven Basic Needs of a Husband 21 - Seven Basic Needs of a Husband In a shocking turn of events, Kyle teaches Amanda IBLP's seven basic needs of a husband. Amanda is traumatized. Hilarity ensues.

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]]> In a shocking turn of events, Kyle teaches Amanda IBLP's seven basic needs of a husband. Amanda is traumatized. Hilarity ensues.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14395245 Mon, 29 Jan 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3956 cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, homeschooling, cult podcast, couple podcast, deconstruction, exvangelical, religion, recovery, healing, true cult, spiritual, spiritual journey, marriage, relationships, husband and wife, therapy 1 21 full true 20 - Demonic Cabbage Patch Kids 20 - Demonic Cabbage Patch Kids Kyle finally gets his wish as he and Amanda discuss the infamous Cabbage Patch Kid dolls and the IBLP teachings surrounding them. Amanda shares the requirements Bill Gothard made of all cult families who owned these dolls, as well as a few other popular toys. Get your burn barrels ready and prepare to cast out some demons, folks!

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]]> Kyle finally gets his wish as he and Amanda discuss the infamous Cabbage Patch Kid dolls and the IBLP teachings surrounding them. Amanda shares the requirements Bill Gothard made of all cult families who owned these dolls, as well as a few other popular toys. Get your burn barrels ready and prepare to cast out some demons, folks!

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14350934 Mon, 22 Jan 2024 00:00:00 -0500 1282 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health 1 20 full true 19 - So Shall Thy Poverty Come to Thee 19 - So Shall Thy Poverty Come to Thee Amanda tells Kyle what caused her to become a workaholic (spoiler alert: IBLP teachings).  She walks through the ideology that is burned into her brain about work ethic and what it takes to be a “good” person. Bill Gothard’s twisted interpretation of the Bible makes another appearance, and Kyle shares the strange phenomenon that occurs for Amanda medically when she works too much. 

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]]> Amanda tells Kyle what caused her to become a workaholic (spoiler alert: IBLP teachings).  She walks through the ideology that is burned into her brain about work ethic and what it takes to be a “good” person. Bill Gothard’s twisted interpretation of the Bible makes another appearance, and Kyle shares the strange phenomenon that occurs for Amanda medically when she works too much. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14295941 Mon, 15 Jan 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3452 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Mental Health 1 19 full true 18 - Therapy is Sin 18 - Therapy is Sin Amanda tells Kyle all about Bill Gothard's, uh, unique approach to mental health, counseling, and especially counseling abuse survivors. We learn all about reins (send help), how everything is our own fault (especially abuse), and how to get more serotonin (according to IBLP and not medically verified). This episodes takes about as many turns as Bill's twisted approach to mental health. We laugh, we cry, Kyle experiences shock, and Amanda remembers why she's still going to therapy today. 

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]]> Amanda tells Kyle all about Bill Gothard's, uh, unique approach to mental health, counseling, and especially counseling abuse survivors. We learn all about reins (send help), how everything is our own fault (especially abuse), and how to get more serotonin (according to IBLP and not medically verified). This episodes takes about as many turns as Bill's twisted approach to mental health. We laugh, we cry, Kyle experiences shock, and Amanda remembers why she's still going to therapy today. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14257348 Mon, 08 Jan 2024 00:00:00 -0500 4183 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Therapy, Counseling, Psychology 1 18 full true 17 - Cult Rhemas for the New Year 17 - Cult Rhemas for the New Year Who's ready for 2024?! Amanda and Kyle start off the New Year with stories of young Amanda's panicked search for a Rhema (a special word from God) for each new year and, like, every other day of the year. Amanda tells Kyle about a typical New Years in her home growing up in the IBLP cult. Kyle shocks Amanda with his own stories from young adulthood, and we all go on a Myspace search. Join us for a booze-free and somehow still raucous start to the New Year!

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]]> Who's ready for 2024?! Amanda and Kyle start off the New Year with stories of young Amanda's panicked search for a Rhema (a special word from God) for each new year and, like, every other day of the year. Amanda tells Kyle about a typical New Years in her home growing up in the IBLP cult. Kyle shocks Amanda with his own stories from young adulthood, and we all go on a Myspace search. Join us for a booze-free and somehow still raucous start to the New Year!

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14217197 Mon, 01 Jan 2024 00:00:00 -0500 3050 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Holidays, New Years 1 17 full true 16 - Christmas in the Cult 16 - Christmas in the Cult Amanda and Kyle talk about Christmas traditions and ideology influenced by the IBLP cult. From Santa’s role as an agent of Satan to distract from Christ to annual research projects due on Christmas Eve, Amanda walks Kyle through a typical Christmas growing up in the cult. Kyle provides the normal Christmas perspective, and Amanda and Kyle think through what they would keep and what they would definitely leave behind if they have kids someday. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle talk about Christmas traditions and ideology influenced by the IBLP cult. From Santa’s role as an agent of Satan to distract from Christ to annual research projects due on Christmas Eve, Amanda walks Kyle through a typical Christmas growing up in the cult. Kyle provides the normal Christmas perspective, and Amanda and Kyle think through what they would keep and what they would definitely leave behind if they have kids someday. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14161499 Mon, 18 Dec 2023 00:00:00 -0500 3002 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Spiritual Abuse, Christmas, Cult Christmas 1 16 full true 15 - Are All Religions Cults? 15 - Are All Religions Cults? Join Amanda and Kyle along with special guest Tim Whitaker from The New Evangelicals as they explore the distinction between cults and religions. In response to a listener question, the trio discusses the differences and similarities between the two, including whether Jesus could be considered a cult leader. The conversation covers their personal experiences with Christianity, the American church, and IBLP. Tune in to hear their insights and reflections, and discover where the conversation leads.

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]]> Join Amanda and Kyle along with special guest Tim Whitaker from The New Evangelicals as they explore the distinction between cults and religions. In response to a listener question, the trio discusses the differences and similarities between the two, including whether Jesus could be considered a cult leader. The conversation covers their personal experiences with Christianity, the American church, and IBLP. Tune in to hear their insights and reflections, and discover where the conversation leads.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs with Tim Whitaker Buzzsprout-14117513 Mon, 11 Dec 2023 00:00:00 -0500 2968 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Religion, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, The New Evangelicals 1 15 full true 14 - Divorce in the Cult 14 - Divorce in the Cult In a deeply personal conversation, Amanda and Kyle discuss the ideology surrounding divorce in the IBLP cult. Amanda shares about her divorce, which finalized five years ago the day this episode was released, and explains the way cult teaching keeps people - particularly women - trapped in harmful marriages. Kyle shares his perspective from outside the cult, and together they talk through the spiritual, emotional, and economic implications of divorce for women who are dependent on their husbands as outlined in Bill Gothard's teachings on authority.

Resource List:

www.thehotline.org
www.nrcdv.org
www.ncadv.org/RESOURCES


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]]> In a deeply personal conversation, Amanda and Kyle discuss the ideology surrounding divorce in the IBLP cult. Amanda shares about her divorce, which finalized five years ago the day this episode was released, and explains the way cult teaching keeps people - particularly women - trapped in harmful marriages. Kyle shares his perspective from outside the cult, and together they talk through the spiritual, emotional, and economic implications of divorce for women who are dependent on their husbands as outlined in Bill Gothard's teachings on authority.

Resource List:

www.thehotline.org
www.nrcdv.org
www.ncadv.org/RESOURCES


Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14070809 Mon, 04 Dec 2023 00:00:00 -0500 4488 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Marriage, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey, Divorce, Domestic Violence 1 14 full true 13 - Q&A with Amanda & Kyle 13 - Q&A with Amanda & Kyle Amanda and Kyle answer listener questions. As Kyle puts it, everyone and their mom wants to know if Amanda still believes in God. Listen to the episode to find out! And feel free to submit more questions; we’ll keep answering them. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle answer listener questions. As Kyle puts it, everyone and their mom wants to know if Amanda still believes in God. Listen to the episode to find out! And feel free to submit more questions; we’ll keep answering them. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14025384 Mon, 27 Nov 2023 00:00:00 -0500 3947 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Exvangelical, Recovery, Healing, True Cult, Spiritual, Spiritual Journey 1 13 full true 12 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 4 12 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 4 In the final installment of their Shiny Happy People review, Amanda and Kyle have an emotional conversation about episode four of the docuseries. They discuss the correlations between Josh Dugger and Amanda’s brother, as well as the parental responses of Jim Bob and Michelle and Amanda’s bio parents. Kyle and Amanda react to Anna Duggar’s choices in the aftermath of Josh’s investigation and trial and set the stage for a conversation about the cult’s stance on divorce, which will be the subject of an episode coming in a few weeks. Amanda shares her experiences with the Joshua Generation and their goal of taking over the government, and ultimately the world, as an “elite strike force” for Christ. Kyle and Amanda talk about the hard work of deconstruction after leaving the cult and the caring community that awaits anyone who leaves behind the IBLP cult and Bill Gothard’s teachings. 

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]]> In the final installment of their Shiny Happy People review, Amanda and Kyle have an emotional conversation about episode four of the docuseries. They discuss the correlations between Josh Dugger and Amanda’s brother, as well as the parental responses of Jim Bob and Michelle and Amanda’s bio parents. Kyle and Amanda react to Anna Duggar’s choices in the aftermath of Josh’s investigation and trial and set the stage for a conversation about the cult’s stance on divorce, which will be the subject of an episode coming in a few weeks. Amanda shares her experiences with the Joshua Generation and their goal of taking over the government, and ultimately the world, as an “elite strike force” for Christ. Kyle and Amanda talk about the hard work of deconstruction after leaving the cult and the caring community that awaits anyone who leaves behind the IBLP cult and Bill Gothard’s teachings. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-14000937 Mon, 20 Nov 2023 00:00:00 -0500 3741 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Recovery, Healing, True Cult 1 12 full true 11 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 3 11 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 3 Amanda and Kyle review episode three of Shiny Happy People. They discuss Bill Gothard’s teachings on authority within the IBLP cult and the creepy dynamic the cult created between fathers and their virgin daughters. Amanda and Kyle discuss the ways Jim Bob Duggar tricked and coerced his children into appearing on the 19 Kids and Counting and Jill and Jessa Counting On TV shows without compensation. Amanda explains to Kyle the dynamics within the cult that would result in an adult child signing legal contracts without knowing the implications of their commitment and how the cult environment and hierarchy conditioned people for abuse and silence.

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]]> Amanda and Kyle review episode three of Shiny Happy People. They discuss Bill Gothard’s teachings on authority within the IBLP cult and the creepy dynamic the cult created between fathers and their virgin daughters. Amanda and Kyle discuss the ways Jim Bob Duggar tricked and coerced his children into appearing on the 19 Kids and Counting and Jill and Jessa Counting On TV shows without compensation. Amanda explains to Kyle the dynamics within the cult that would result in an adult child signing legal contracts without knowing the implications of their commitment and how the cult environment and hierarchy conditioned people for abuse and silence.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13957488 Mon, 13 Nov 2023 00:00:00 -0500 5004 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast, Couple Podcast, Deconstruction, Recovery, Healing, True Cult 1 11 full true 10 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 2 10 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 2 Amanda and Kyle recap episode two of Shiny Happy People. They discuss Josh Duggar's sexual assault of his sisters and the Ashley Madison scandal in which Josh was implicated. Kyle asks Amanda to explain the IBLP cult concept of eye traps, and they discuss the complexities of being a female in the cult. This episode is a wild ride of burning various items in to avoid satanic influence, spiritual gifts, parentification of children, and how parents in the cult went about breaking a child's will. Amanda and Kyle also discuss the public abuse of children that comes up in the second episode of the documentary, and Amanda explains Bill Gothard's teachings on authority. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle recap episode two of Shiny Happy People. They discuss Josh Duggar's sexual assault of his sisters and the Ashley Madison scandal in which Josh was implicated. Kyle asks Amanda to explain the IBLP cult concept of eye traps, and they discuss the complexities of being a female in the cult. This episode is a wild ride of burning various items in to avoid satanic influence, spiritual gifts, parentification of children, and how parents in the cult went about breaking a child's will. Amanda and Kyle also discuss the public abuse of children that comes up in the second episode of the documentary, and Amanda explains Bill Gothard's teachings on authority. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13874862 Mon, 06 Nov 2023 00:00:00 -0500 4184 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, Cult Podcast 1 10 full true Special Halloween Message from Amanda & Kyle Special Halloween Message from Amanda & Kyle Here's your weather forecast for Halloween 2023. Enjoy!

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]]> Here's your weather forecast for Halloween 2023. Enjoy!

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13883744 Tue, 31 Oct 2023 16:00:00 -0400 313 Cult, Cult Podcast, IBLP, ATI, Halloween bonus false 9 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 1 9 - Shiny Happy People Review Part 1 Amanda and Kyle talk through the first episode of Shiny Happy People, a documentary about the Duggar family and their TLC show 19 Kids and Counting. The Duggars are part of the IBLP cult, and Amanda and Kyle discuss the many ways Amanda's story overlaps with the Duggar story, Josh's sexual assault scandal, and what life was like growing up under Bill Gothard's influence. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle talk through the first episode of Shiny Happy People, a documentary about the Duggar family and their TLC show 19 Kids and Counting. The Duggars are part of the IBLP cult, and Amanda and Kyle discuss the many ways Amanda's story overlaps with the Duggar story, Josh's sexual assault scandal, and what life was like growing up under Bill Gothard's influence. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13830889 Mon, 30 Oct 2023 00:00:00 -0400 4953 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Shiny Happy People, Duggar Family, Homeschooling, 1 9 full true 8 - Four Years in Court 8 - Four Years in Court Amanda tells Kyle about breaking away from IBLP ideology and reaching the point of being able to report her brother. She talks about the people who helped her disengage from Bill Gothard's teachings and develop an appropriate understanding of justice and accountability. Amanda details the four-year process of criminal court, how her family reacted, and how the case concluded.  This episode includes Amanda's victim impact statement from her brother's sentencing hearing, minus the graphic details of assault. 

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]]> Amanda tells Kyle about breaking away from IBLP ideology and reaching the point of being able to report her brother. She talks about the people who helped her disengage from Bill Gothard's teachings and develop an appropriate understanding of justice and accountability. Amanda details the four-year process of criminal court, how her family reacted, and how the case concluded.  This episode includes Amanda's victim impact statement from her brother's sentencing hearing, minus the graphic details of assault. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13825011 Mon, 23 Oct 2023 00:00:00 -0400 5970 Cult, IBLP, ATI, Bill Gothard, Sexual Assault Recovery, Shiny Happy People 1 8 full true 7 - Healing Begins 7 - Healing Begins Amanda's world opens up even more as she begins to step away from her family and IBLP cult ideology and towards healing. Amanda and Kyle talk about the circumstances that occurred to get Amanda to finally begin speaking up about what happened to her, her parents' reaction to her speaking up, and the people who supported her through her first tentative steps toward health and safety. Additionally, Amanda tells Kyle about how she finally got a mental health diagnosis, the process of going through PTSD treatment, and how she moved toward seeking accountability and justice.

Link to Amanda's book

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]]> Amanda's world opens up even more as she begins to step away from her family and IBLP cult ideology and towards healing. Amanda and Kyle talk about the circumstances that occurred to get Amanda to finally begin speaking up about what happened to her, her parents' reaction to her speaking up, and the people who supported her through her first tentative steps toward health and safety. Additionally, Amanda tells Kyle about how she finally got a mental health diagnosis, the process of going through PTSD treatment, and how she moved toward seeking accountability and justice.

Link to Amanda's book

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13751911 Mon, 16 Oct 2023 00:00:00 -0400 5164 1 7 full true 6 - Girl Meets World 6 - Girl Meets World Amanda tells Kyle about the people and circumstances that created formative moments as she finished high school and left her biological family's home for college. She talks about her older sister finding out about the abuse, the ways IBLP ideology influenced her parents' decision about her college education and relationships, and how Bill Gothard's teachings about authority caused her to be controlled even as a young adult living away from home and supporting herself. 

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]]> Amanda tells Kyle about the people and circumstances that created formative moments as she finished high school and left her biological family's home for college. She talks about her older sister finding out about the abuse, the ways IBLP ideology influenced her parents' decision about her college education and relationships, and how Bill Gothard's teachings about authority caused her to be controlled even as a young adult living away from home and supporting herself. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13719400 Mon, 09 Oct 2023 00:00:00 -0400 5084 1 6 full true 5 - The Abuse Continues 5 - The Abuse Continues Amanda talks about life after the first time she told her parents about her brother sexually assaulting her. She tells Kyle about getting through high school and trying to protect her younger siblings from her brother.  Amanda also discusses her brother being sent away to an IBLP facility, just like Josh Duggar, and her parents' control over her life and their narrative of the abuse.

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]]> Amanda talks about life after the first time she told her parents about her brother sexually assaulting her. She tells Kyle about getting through high school and trying to protect her younger siblings from her brother.  Amanda also discusses her brother being sent away to an IBLP facility, just like Josh Duggar, and her parents' control over her life and their narrative of the abuse.

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13679400 Mon, 02 Oct 2023 00:00:00 -0400 3608 1 5 full true 4 - The Abuse Begins 4 - The Abuse Begins Amanda begins her story of surviving childhood physical, emotional, verbal, spiritual, and sexual abuse in the IBLP cult. 

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]]> Amanda begins her story of surviving childhood physical, emotional, verbal, spiritual, and sexual abuse in the IBLP cult. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13660485 Mon, 25 Sep 2023 19:00:00 -0400 4004 1 4 full true 3 - Gothard Girls 3 - Gothard Girls Amanda details Bill Gothard's pattern of sexual harassment and assault of teenage girls and young women in IBLP that went unhindered for decades. 

Edit: Toward the end of the episode, Amanda says Bill resigned in 2004, but she meant to say 2014. 

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]]> Amanda details Bill Gothard's pattern of sexual harassment and assault of teenage girls and young women in IBLP that went unhindered for decades. 

Edit: Toward the end of the episode, Amanda says Bill resigned in 2004, but she meant to say 2014. 

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]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13600198 Mon, 18 Sep 2023 00:00:00 -0400 4983 1 3 full true 2 - A Harem, a Coup, and a Ponzi Scheme 2 - A Harem, a Coup, and a Ponzi Scheme Amanda gives Kyle background on IBLP leadership to set the stage for future episodes. She details the Gothard brothers, their various scandals, and the ways IBLP covered them up and put cult members at greater risk of harm.

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]]> Amanda gives Kyle background on IBLP leadership to set the stage for future episodes. She details the Gothard brothers, their various scandals, and the ways IBLP covered them up and put cult members at greater risk of harm.

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13566503 Mon, 11 Sep 2023 00:00:00 -0400 1956 1 2 full true 1 - The First Rule of Cults is We're Not a Cult 1 - The First Rule of Cults is We're Not a Cult Amanda and Kyle open the podcast with a history of the IBLP cult led by Bill Gothard. Amanda explains the cult's early beginnings, exponential growth, and transformation into the organization that exists to this day. She shares the core tenants of Gothard's ideology, as well as her childhood perspective of the teachings she was forced to memorize and live by as a child raised in the cult. 

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]]> Amanda and Kyle open the podcast with a history of the IBLP cult led by Bill Gothard. Amanda explains the cult's early beginnings, exponential growth, and transformation into the organization that exists to this day. She shares the core tenants of Gothard's ideology, as well as her childhood perspective of the teachings she was forced to memorize and live by as a child raised in the cult. 

Support the show

]]> Amanda & Kyle Briggs Buzzsprout-13523728 Mon, 04 Sep 2023 00:00:00 -0400 4415 1 1 full true