Refreshing Leadership

S2: 35 Highs, Lows, and What Is Next? Season 2 recap with Rob Lawrence, Podcast Producer

Fri, 17 May 2024 05:00:00 +0200

Aaand, that’s a wrap! Season 2 is complete, with 35 episodes in the can and downloaded (so far) 4,198 times! Thank you so, so much, to everyone who listened, discussed, shared, messaged me, and absorbed some of this information into your life!

Podcast Producer Rob Lawrence sits in the interview seat for this one, extracting all sorts of home truths from me about what it’s been like for me to host this season, the journey its taken me on, and what might be coming up next.

Here’s a sneak peek of what’s in the episode:
Behind the Scenes with Rob: Rob discusses the intricate balancing act required behind the podcast, and how he experiences each episode raw, through his ears.

Rebranding Journey: Yes, I renamed the podcast mid-season. He told me not to. We clear this one up!

Spotlight on Unexpected Journeys: Rob shares his admiration for guests like Hannah Shergold, who transitioned from being a veterinarian and a military helicopter pilot to becoming a celebrated artist. We discuss the personal breakthroughs and leadership lessons derived from the diverse life paths of the guests this season.

The Essence of Authenticity: Rob emphasizes authenticity in podcasting – how spontaneous, profound dialogues foster a genuine connection with our audience and can really make a big difference to life’s struggles.

Reflections on Leadership and Mental Health: Podcasts are an awesome slow and long-form content for people really intending to learn new things that will make a difference. Podcasts in mental health are no exception and this one is having a big impact.

Future of the Podcast: Looking ahead, what is next?

11:01 Understanding and acknowledging trauma in everyday life.

11:50 Realization of podcast's leadership focus and growth.

17:43 Sharing digested knowledge, wisdom, ethical business, costs.

27:25 Curiosity about benefits and personal impact of podcasts.

32:53 Podcast's exciting risk element and human insights.

37:07 Podcast pauses create a reflective, intimate experience.

44:10 Unexpected standout episode, brilliant role model.

50:24 Edgy question led to talk about change.

57:28 Younger generation helping others find language. Leadership.

01:04:09 Transitioning to website as main professional platform.

And go to the companion blog here.

Check out Rob and his business Podcast Plus Ltd here.

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

If you enjoyed this or found it useful please subscribe on the show website, https://refreshingleadership.buzzsprout.com/
You can listen on most platforms, or scroll through all the episodes on my website here.
I write a companion blog to each episode - they are all on my website here.

Do please share this link, and if you'd like, give it a rating or leave a review (wherever you listen) will help the podcast reach more people.

Thank you!

To continue the conversation go to:
Website: https://katebrassington.com/ (where you can easily message me)
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kate-brassington/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/katebrassingto3
Email: kate@katebrassington.com

S2.34: Passionate About Positive Leadership! With Chartered Coaching Psychologist, Cornelia Lucey

Fri, 10 May 2024 05:00:00 +0200

Meet Cornelia Lucey, Chartered Coaching Psychologist, business owner, leadership coach, and author of a Routledge-published book - Positive Leadership in Practice: A Model for Our Future.

Although Cornelia and I are fellow alumni, I had never had a chat with her in person (ok, on zoom), and after reading her book I was delighted to get over an hour with her all to myself. She was thoroughly iinspiring to talk to and I hope you enjoy the conversation!

Here's a quick preview of what we discussed:

**Groundwork in Trauma-Informed Leadership:** Cornelia opens up about the significance of understanding trauma responses in the workplace—insightful for anyone aspiring to lead with empathy (or do we mean compassion)!

**Resilience as a Skill:** We agreed that deep in the fabric of our nervous systems, leaders can cultivate resilience, not just in themselves but across their teams.

**Embracing Emotional Agility:** Learn how your emotional responses can shape your leadership style and the overarching health of your organization.

**The Science of Safety:** Cornelia breaks down polyvagal theory in a practical manner, showing how safety and connectivity are critical to effective leadership.

**Leadership Refresh:** It's time to rethink what effective leadership looks like in the modern world. Cornelia proposes a fresh model that emphasizes human-centric values and empowerment.

**Self-Care Reimagined:** We tackle the often-neglected aspect of leadership—self-care. Not just for crisis management, but as an integral part of day-to-day resilience.

Some timestamps:

00:00 Organizational psychologist's mission: improve leadership quality.

05:21 Transitioned from teaching to global leadership development.

13:23 Leadership focused on people, strengths, and abundance.

20:30 Human experience in work and polyvagal theory.

23:52 Adapt communication to others' emotional states.

29:46 Human evolution shapes understanding of psychological health.

35:54 Building resilience through empathy and support.

41:18 Understanding connections, values, and strengths in leadership.

48:46 Prioritizing self-care.

50:49 Focusing on human behavior for high performance.

👉 Want more from Cornelia?

CLPL website: www.cornelialucey.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cornelialucey

Positive Leadership book: https://www.cornelialucey.com/the-book

S2.33: Trauma is Already Outside the Box; But Are You Still Thinking Inside the Box? A Primer for Refreshing Leaders

Fri, 03 May 2024 05:00:00 +0200

This is the first time I’ve created an episode where I’m connecting you back to one of the very first episodes on this podcast, launched around a year ago.

Trauma remains widely misunderstood. It is put in a box and left in a corner for therapists and psychiatrists to deal with. But this only reflects a very small portion of people. Most people affected by trauma are in our villages, communities, towns, workplaces.

This episode is for you to get acquainted with the idea that trauma is transdiagnostic… it no longer fits into a neat diagnostic “box”.

It is way outside that box, and you can get up to speed right now!

02:00 Holding space for others.

05:29 Impact of modern world on human evolution.

07:08 Promoting awareness for inclusion and compassionate leadership.

10:30 Understanding trauma for better mental health recovery.

13:21 Nervous system freeze in extreme survival situations.

18:35 Navigating societal pressure: trauma reactions and norms.

21:02 Importance of allyship and understanding nervous system.

26:51 Overcoming trauma, exploring various therapeutic modalities.

The podcast episode is largely informed by the fantastic essay "Trauma Needs a Rebrand - Trauma, Psychedelics, Limitations of Our Existing Models, and Exciting Alternatives" by Liam Farquhar that I highly recommend you read too!

To read the companion blog that goes with this episode click here

S2.32: Credible, Fast-Talking, Fascinating; A Kitchen-Table Chat With Dr Natalie Lancer, Chair of BPS Division of Coaching Psychology

Fri, 26 Apr 2024 05:00:00 +0200

This episode is a quick, energising and inspiring canter through the fields of coaching psychology, existentialism, neuroscience, leadership, and what it is like to be a senior leader inside the Division of Coaching Psychology!

Dr. Natalie Lancer is absolutely a role model for me as she unashamedly brings a blend of psychology expertise to sit alongside deep knowledge and understanding not just through the eyes of professionals, but real-life people.

As you can imagine I was especially interested to hear her thoughts on the emerging field of trauma-informed coaching alongside her deep dive knowledge of existentialism.

I loved that I (mostly) could keep up with Dr Natalie, and her generosity and vulnerability in what she said. I hope you enjoy listening as much as I did!

A snapshot of what we cover:

Dynamic Leadership; how to be available and really listen to a huge group of people.

Unblocking Progress: The hilarious analogy of Dr Natalie’s “inner plumber” leadership qualities, her natural skill as a connector, and how she drives change for progress.

Coaching for Now: the magic of what happens in coaching psychology practice.

Ethics and Adaptation: The vital role of ethical codes and ongoing professional development which coaching psychologists take very seriously.

Academic Vs. Applied Balance: The tension (or blend) between academic precision and real-time client communication in the leadership field.

Some timestamps:

00:00 Differing perspectives on existentialism and psychology.

07:03 Coaching psychologists have diverse backgrounds and roles.

13:52 Balancing academic language with practical client communication.

16:00 Using metaphor and heuristic to communicate knowledge.

22:15 Coaching academic leaders in unique leadership challenges.

26:27 Finding connections between coaching and different backgrounds.

29:25 Questioning expertise, critical reading, knowledge evaluation.

32:38 Integrating CPD into practice requires courage.

41:37 Positive experiences.

52:18 Chair of Senate at BPS, representing others.

You can read more from Natalie including her books, research papers and more, on her website, and you can message her on LinkedIn.

Read my companion blog to this episode on my website here.

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

© 2024 Refreshing Leadership Podcast. All rights reserved.

S2.31: Contradict Yourself! Identify Where You Disagree With Yourself To Unlock Creativity

Fri, 19 Apr 2024 05:00:00 +0200

We are not mono-mind… and we do not think just one thing on any topic… but what about when you radically disagree with yourself? In psychology these are called “polarities” - opinions or thoughts that are literally polar opposites. Often they are pathologised and people try to get rid of them.

But did you know that this is an area of potential creativity you can set your mind to explore?

A great example I heard recently is the core of Gore-Tex technology – think breathable yet waterproof. These two polar opposites combine to make an extraordinary fabric used the world over.

If you are tussling over a gritty issue in your mind, this episode is for you!

Did you know there's a companion blog to each episode? Find this one here!

Here's a snapshot of what you'll discover:

The Inner Tug-of-War: The power of polarities – those annoying inner contradictions that can lead to innovation.

Behind the Contradictions: I share a practical exercise I learnt recently from Been Sharma https://instituteofcoaching.org/author/sharma-beena.

Archetypes and Inner Voices: I take this further and share how you can look beyond mere strengths and get into character archetypes as a way of more clearly hearing and noticing the diverse voices in our head.

Curiosity: Fire up your inner observer (the watcher at the back of the room of your mind, the one that listens to your thoughts all day long) and learn how to observe your own thoughts for insights and clarity.

Timestamps:

01:00 Exploring archetypes to understand polarities more.

04:20 Internal conflict can lead to frustration, weariness.

07:30 Freud and Jung show subconscious affects conscious decisions.

10:48 Balancing business roles and avoiding distractions.

16:13 Explore polarity management map for personal growth.

17:49 The struggle between organization and progress.

20:59 Work with me to improve mental health.

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

S2.30: Mission-Led Content from a Young Age? Meet Author Gracie Barry and her Entrepreneur Mum Lisa

Fri, 12 Apr 2024 05:00:00 +0200

Gracie Barry was 10 years old when she had a sudden idea, fully formed, about a Slime Ball Anxiety Monster called Jeff, who lives in her head, and ruins otherwise perfectly good days.

Within a couple of days, Jeff the manuscript had helped her explain anxiety to a doctor in a way she’d never managed before. It began to help the whole family find words to describe a thing that no-one can see.

And mum Lisa, already an established Mission-Led Content expert and business owner, had an idea. Along came Helen Hill, illustrator, and that was that!

Gracie is still shy, but she chattered away off camera to me, and you can hear her tell us about Jeff for the first part of the podcast. Then we get some time with Lisa who herself is a thoroughly fun person and definitely an atypical leader!

Some highlights:

Child's Voice in Mental Health: Gracie shares her story of using 'Jeff' as a tool to articulate her anxiety, propelling her narrative into a helpful children's book.
Evolutionary Business: Hear how Lisa turned the nightmare of redundancy during pregnancy into a tale of growth and tenacity for success.
Shy Leaders: Lisa shares her initially reluctant journey to accepting her identity as a leader and the owner of her endeavors.
Mission-Led Academia: Discover Lisa's conscious communication approach to writing anything (especially about mission-led business)!

Here are some timestamps:
04:43 When Jeff first explained Anxiety as a climbing slime ball.
13:03 Getting book in UK, feeling like real author.
17:00 Struggling with traditional leadership roles and perceptions.
19:46 Choosing words carefully shapes our lives.
25:06 Challenges in life lead to diverse paths.
31:28 The Mission-Led Content Academy offers ongoing support for growth.
37:02 Acknowledge small steps, avoid pressure of comparison.
45:16 Mental health support for leaders and teams.

Read the blog that accompanies this episode here.

Buy the book! Funds will go towards the illustrator Helen, touring schools talking to kids about how to bring their ideas to life on a page!

Lisa’s website is great, also check out her facebook page where you can get to know her and her Mission-Led Content Village

Check out Author-Illustrator Helen Hill

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

S2.29: Strengthening Minds: Nature-Based Learning for Child Well-being

Fri, 05 Apr 2024 05:00:00 +0200

We know that hunter-gatherer societies are where our human evolution is still at. We know that we have not evolved at the speed that modern technology has so rapidly changed the world we live in. We know that in terms of human evolution, hunter-gatherer societies were simply one tiny gene shift away.

The group most impacted by this is children in schools, with modern high-stakes exams, sitting at desks, and highly structured environments. Humans simply didn’t evolve to learn best by a single adult instructing a same-age group of children. We evolved to learn by play, example, and practice.

Happily, even small changes can make a difference. In this episode I share my experiences as a parent volunteer chaperone at our International School of Luxembourg’s Nature-Based Learning for Well-Being program, on a wonderful day out recently.

Here's a sneak peek:

How independent learning outdoors can bolster social and emotional confidence.
The connections I see between trauma-informed spaces, neurodiversity, and their collective importance in shaping supportive environments.
I share a little what I’ve learned recently about the evolutionary biology that is thought to underpin ADHD, that challenges the traditional medical narratives.
Movement in learning isn't just beneficial, it's essential — echoing the natural ways our hunter-gatherer ancestors learned and thrived.

Some timestamps:

00:00 Modern life causing high stress.

06:27 Living in urban environments as “evolutionary mismatch”.

09:00 Neurodivergence.

11:38 Research on ADHD and hunter-gatherer societies.

16:32 Adding movement improves focus and learning.

22:45 Dogs in schools.

26:10 Embracing neurodiversity and trauma-informed approaches.

To follow ISL on facebook, use this link: https://www.facebook.com/ISLux/

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

S2.28: Thriving Teams: A Trauma-Informed Approach to Resilient Leadership with Julia Vaughan-Smith, Master Executive Coach & Supervisor

Fri, 29 Mar 2024 00:00:00 +0100

I had the privilege of engaging with Julia Vaughan-Smith, one of the pioneers of trauma-informed coaching, in whose footsteps I am trying to follow.

Julia is an author of several books based on her experience as a psychotherapist and executive coach. She has spent years training other coaches in walking this often grey area between coaching and therapy - after all, if someone is truly a leader, they must bring their whole self into it, and this can demand some healing.

Here's a taster of what we cover:

Trauma and the Brain: Julia sheds light on the critical intersection between trauma, neurodivergence, and coaching—beyond diagnoses.

Creating Safe Spaces: The art of fostering safe environments that honor clients' past experiences and support their present ambitions.

The Shadow of Protection: The balance of boundaries and the sometimes hidden aspects of the protector's role in leadership.

Innovative Engagement: Julia and I chat about the unconventional tools we use to connect with clients—even through the virtual interface of Zoom.

Pioneering Pathways: From psychotherapy to writing, Julia shares her transformative journey, offering wisdom for emerging leaders.

Embracing Uncertainty: The beauty of maintaining a learner's mindset in coaching.

Curiosity Over Diagnosis: The crucial difference between coaching and psychotherapy, as we emphasize presence over labels.

Flexibility in Goals: Inquiry into why intentions might sometimes serve clients better than rigid goals.

Leading from Within: Leaders are invited to consider the importance of nurturing their mental health for the benefit of their entire team.

Julia maintains the stance that continuing education and good supervision are vital components in preventing practitioner burnout and client misguidance. This episode not only serves as an enlightening guide for leaders and coaches but also reinforces the undervalued aspect of self-care in leadership roles.

Here are some timestamps:

06:22 Importance of trauma awareness in coaching sessions.

09:15 Discussing importance of exploring past experiences in therapy.

14:28 Approach client with gentle curiosity, avoid assumptions.

16:58 Coaching school introduced new approach, challenges accountability.

20:58 Encouraging neurodivergence growth and understanding, coaching future.

25:00 Recognize and explore patterns, change and safety.

26:29 Different views on safety in medical practice.

30:58 Understanding system dynamics crucial for coaching executives.

35:07 Leadership development work remains essential for growth.

36:44 Self-awareness crucial for effective leadership and decision-making.

41:33 Retired from psychotherapy and online teaching, writing book.

43:46 "You are a role model, breaking ground."

To continue the conversation with Julia you can read her books, such as https://www.juliavaughansmith.co.uk/ She lives in East Devon, teaching and writing about emotional trauma. This is the third book by Julia Vaughan Smith.

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

S2: 27. A Big Birthday! and What's Next?!: Mid-Season Reflections on Refreshing Leadership Podcast

Fri, 22 Mar 2024 05:00:00 +0100

It was my Big Birthday last week! Celebrating with family in Ireland, plus a swim in the sea and various other rituals was making me reflect so much on life, and the meaning in, and OF life, that I just had to share some of this with you all!

Passage of My Time:
50 years ago it was 1974 (a great vintage though I may say so!)… and 50 years before that it was 1924. My grandparents were in their teens, and life was incredibly different. What will life be like in 50 years time?

Passage of Time in this Podcast:
I wander through the library of podcast episodes that we’ve had since my last review in the autumn. From shattering norms to crafting personal vision and leadership through spirituality, we've certainly got stuck into topics that challenge old leadership paradigms.

What’s Next?
Stay tuned for upcoming episodes on psychedelics in trauma recovery, aging, and even a chat with an 8-year-old author on anxiety. Join me as we explore the world of leadership, coaching psychology, and so much more.

Timestamps:

00:00 Reflecting on time's continuity and personal significance.

03:53 Podcast born from reflective exercise, sharing wisdom.

10:16 Winter meditation, empathy, leadership, and psychedelics discussed.

13:24 Exciting future ahead in neuroscience of leadership

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

S2: 26. Plant-Medicine Strength: Embracing Softness in a Hard World with Combat Veteran Keith Abraham. CEO Heroic Hearts UK

Fri, 15 Mar 2024 05:00:00 +0100

I’m delighted to introduce Keith Abraham, a human resiliency expert and the CEO of Heroic Hearts UK. This conversation is completely new territory for me as I’ve not ever explored therapeutic psychedelics! The conversation was incredible, Keith is the epitome of humility and courage, and I’m privileged to share the conversation with you.

Mindful Misconceptions: Keith dismantles the westernized version of mindfulness, urging a return to its healing roots.

Psychedelic Pre-Requisites: Preparing for a psychedelic journey is no small feat. Keith outlines the essential steps and the profound duty of care involved.

Continuum of Healing: Navigating the mental health continuum, highlighting transformative encounters with therapeutic psychedelics.

Demanding Compassion: The balance between empathy and safeguarding, striking a delicate chord in leadership.

Evolution of Empathy: Has humanity really advanced in empathy and compassion?

Forgiveness in Action: Together, we unpack the weight of forgiveness, not as absolution from consequences, but as a call to change and growth.

Strength in Softness: From the Chinese ethos of "iron wrapped in cotton wool" to combat stories, we explore the intersection of vulnerability and resilience.

Humankind's Challenge: Drawing from the book "Humankind," we discuss the training of compassion to build bridges over the divisions caused by tribalism and hate.

Trauma's Teachings: Reflecting on personal trauma, we share how perceived strength can be deceptive, and true strength is often found in flexibility.

Veteran Voices: We highlight the importance of creating safe spaces for veterans to share, heal, and connect with others.

Writing as Healing: Keith hints at a book he might be writing!

Transformation and Integration: The episode illuminates the critical need for integration post-psychedelic experiences, with Keith sharing a personal story.

Inner and Outer Health: We affirm the inseparable link between physical and mental wellness, championing a holistic approach to leadership resilience.

Tune in to embody the change, empower self-healing, and understand why mindful, trauma-informed wisdom is core to effective leadership.

Be prepared to know different and be different.

07:43 Struggles with therapy, healing, and perception.

16:19 Discussing mental health continuum

21:58 Urgency in legalizing plant medicines

24:27 Pioneering organization navigating delicate psychedelic renaissance phase.

38:01 Integration important for big psychedelic experiences.

39:53 Urgent need for personal growth and healing.

50:40 Tai Chi: a martial art for flexibility.

57:36 Veterans-only organization to avoid hierarchy in trauma sharing.

01:08:45 Respect and integrate empathy into compassionate actions

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent #TherapeuticPsychedelics #HeroicHeartsUK

S2.25: Mastering the Mind: Debunking Neuroscience Myths

Fri, 08 Mar 2024 05:00:00 +0100

In this episode of Refreshing Leadership, you'll dive into the world of neuromyths and neuroscience with me!

We'll debunk common misconceptions and explore how to practically apply neuroscience in coaching and psychology.

Get ready for eye-opening discussions about the brain, learning, and the power of science-based metaphors.

We'll address the complexities of coaching psychology, the challenges of staying neuroscience-informed, and the evolving nature of the field.

Join me for an insightful journey into understanding the incredible nervous system in action.

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent

00:00 Debunking neuromyths in leadership and neuroscience.

03:15 Addressing neuroscience myths and applying practical models.

06:51 Apple is more than just chemical compounds.

10:18 "Neuromyth: Left-brain, Right-brain affect personality"

14:51 Effective learning materials on neuroscience and memory.

18:06 Neuroscience is complex and should be respected.

20:58 Coaching psychology is flexible, adaptable, and responsive.

S2: 24. Transforming Trauma: Embracing a Trauma-Informed Leadership Perspective with Mental Health Change Agent Ruth Cooper-Dickson:

Fri, 01 Mar 2024 05:00:00 +0100

I first heard of Ruth Cooper-Dickson because it seemed like everyone in my network was talking about her and her research in trauma-informed coaching! Fast track several months and here she is to share her research, experience, expertise, and life wisdom, with little glimpses through Neuro-Divergent eyes along the way.

In this episode:

A Trauma-Informed Approach:
Ruth and I engage in a deep discussion on the nuances of trauma in leadership and how to navigate mental health in the workplace, combining the need for understanding with actionable strategies.

Leading Through Adversity:
We explore the balance between fostering resilience and acknowledging the challenging economic and global health pressures leaders face.

Neurodiversity and Memory:
Ruth sheds light on the complex interactions between neurodivergent perspectives, trauma, and memory, offering insights on how these dimensions play a crucial role in personal and professional growth.

Well-being and Integration:
The episode dives into the dynamic process of integrating past experiences to create a healthy and effective leadership journey.

From Coaching to Therapeutic Support:
As always with folk who do this work, we touch on the intersection of coaching and therapy, opening up the discussion to how leaders too can provide support that transcends conventional boundaries.

Join us for an insightful session that resonates with the complexities of human experiences, advocating for mental health and purposeful leadership.

#TraumaInformedLeadership #RefreshingLeadership #RefreshingLeadershipPodcast #CoachingPsychology #KnowDifferentBeDifferent #MentalHealthChangeAgent

Timestamps:

07:46 Struggling with panic dis-order, advocating for mental health.
11:17 Entering workplace, adapting to fit in, resilience.
21:57 Shared experiences result in diverse internal reactions.
25:04 Learning, memory, trauma, triggers, and self-talk.
30:56 Mental health and trauma perceptions in society.
34:07 Certified breath work leader promotes holistic healing.
42:29 Interviews revealed diverse domestic abuse experiences and coaching.
45:22 Coaching program leads to transformative personal journeys.
51:30 Coaching for leadership in challenging environments.
01:00:36 Supporting people in accessing mental health care.
01:02:48 Desire to publish a practical guidebook on post-traumatic growth.
01:08:12 Offering support for mental health in leadership.

You can get more from Ruth on her website www.ruthcooperdickson.com

She writes regularly - this is her Substack link: https://ruthcooperdickson.substack.com/

Discount

Ruth has offered us a special 10% off discount on an annual paid subscription to her Substack here.

https://ruthcooperdickson.substack.com/katepodcast

S2.23: Procrastination: A Quick Dive into Its Dual Role as both Protector and Provocateur

Fri, 23 Feb 2024 05:00:00 +0100

In this episode of Refreshing Leadership, we're diving deep into the intriguing world of procrastination. My aim is to bring deeper thought and perspective to the roles of procrastination. It often gets a kicking with people trying to force it away instead of noticing how to understand and harness it for positive effect!

I'll be exploring the question of whether procrastination acts as a protector or provocateur in our lives (or both!). We'll peel back the layers to understand the roles of the brain, consider trauma-informed principles, and examine the influence of neurodivergence on this complex phenomenon.

Protector: I take you through the Nervous System’s natural “setting” that causes us to pause and assess before taking action. We'll take a closer look at how perfectionism and executive function come into play, and I'll share practical strategies to work effectively with this protective aspect. We’ll see the importance of self-compassion and the value of breaking tasks into manageable steps.

Provocateur: I'll uncover the thrilling edge that procrastination can bring to our best work and energy, particularly for individuals with neurodivergent traits. We'll explore the impact of pressure and the pursuit of dopamine hits, and I'll encourage you to embrace your individual strengths while seeking healthy ways to fulfill your needs.

This episode offers a thought-provoking and informative journey into the complexities of procrastination, providing actionable strategies for you to navigate and harness these dual roles.

Some time stamps:

00:00 What inspired this episode
04:45 Understanding procrastination
07:57 Perfectionism and its impact on mental health.
10:02 Listen to protector, break tasks into steps.
15:40 Thriving under pressure in fast-paced societies.
19:25 Focus on meeting deadlines with acceptable quality.
21:18 Break tasks into small manageable steps. Prioritize self-compassion.
24:40 Don’t forget you can work with me to improve mental health.

S2.22: Breaking the Mold in a Male-Dominated Domain: Fearless Leadership in the Security Sector with Letitia Emeana ASIS CPP, PSP and CISMP

Fri, 16 Feb 2024 05:00:00 +0100

As you can imagine, Security is a male-dominated world, recruiting often from police and military veterans (who are predominantly male). So I resonated strongly with some of the issues Letitia was struggling with when she coached with me a few years ago. I’m super proud of her courage and stance on making such an important profession more open and accessible not just to women, but all minority groups.

ASIS International is a global community of security practitioners who are trained, certified and professionals in the protection of assets - people, property, and/or information.

She’s fun, bubbly, and atypical in several different ways (see if you can spot them!). We chat about her early formative life experiences and the various helpers and guides she found along the way to her current senior role in corporate security, as well as her repeated election as UK ASIS Chapter Chairwoman and Board Director.

In particular she shares her experience of finding professional help to identify the best colours and styles of clothes for her. As a petite woman in a roomful of men, she was more often asked if she was from communications, or catering, than recognised as the keynote speaker. While she laughed this off, it wasn’t doing her confidence much good.

She describes the game changing experience of getting a professional colour and personal image consultant in boosting both her inner self confidence and outer self expression, and in the episode we promise to give you the links, so if you’d like to follow this up check out the consultant she mentions https://www.linkedin.com/in/traceymoys/ or the website where you can find a consultant near you https://www.houseofcolour.co.uk/find-consultant or https://www.houseofcolour.com/find-consultant

Some timestamps:

00:00 A Surprise career path.

07:23 Experience in sports contributed to leadership skills.

11:22 Stepping up to lead and inspire change.

17:58 Historical context shapes perceptions of security roles.

23:46 Inclusion and care for employees in workplace.

28:45 Focus on physical aspects of cyber threat.

37:27 Balancing risk, storytelling, influence, business acumen, enforcement.

41:28 Dress influences perception and professional expression.

47:42 Ready to break out of old self.

50:05 Building trust through authentic, consistent behavior is key.

56:09 Discovering color helped confidence, transformed wardrobe journey.

S2:21. Thriving Through Systems: Leaders Taking Control and Growing Me, We, & They

Fri, 09 Feb 2024 05:00:00 +0100

In this episode of Refreshing Leadership, I take you with me on a dive I have recently been revisiting - systems-inspired leadership.

This is a chance to take a macro view of leadership and focus on interconnectedness.

I discuss the three levels of human systems - me, we, and they - and the the power of recognizing and growing strengths at these levels.

I emphasize the need for individuals to take control and manage their own career and life, whether they are self-employed, freelancers (duh, that’s obvious) or employed.

Yes, employed people need to take career management into their own hands and craft and shape their steps just as freelancers and self employed people do!

Talk about getting the fun back - when you step into your agency and power as a leader, whether of just yourself or huge teams of teams, you are shifting your mindset.

With a theme taken from the great book “HR: Disrupted”, I invite you to see yourselves as both consumers and human beings, and highlight the power of self-compassion and vulnerability in leadership. Tune in to hear practical tips for bringing yourself into the center of the system and taking care of yourself while leading within it.

Here are some timestamps:

00:08 My early training in systems theory and its implications.

05:45 Simplified three levels of system: me, we, they.

10:41 Identify and grow personal and collective strengths.

14:19 Reflect on empathy, compassion, and vulnerability in leadership.

16:19 Work one to one for positive change

#RefreshingLeadership #CoachingPsychology #TeamsOfTeams #Resilience #Confidence

S2.20: Serve To Lead - Blending Experience, Trust, and Authenticity with Brigadier Clare Phillips CBE

Fri, 02 Feb 2024 05:00:00 +0100

Ever wanted a kitchen table natter with a really approachable, but super effective person, to ask them “but hang on, how did you do that”? Well that is exactly what I got to do with Clare Phillips, and the result is this week’s podcast episode.

I’m so pleased that my tenuous link with Brigadier Clare Phillips CBE (we were both at Royal Military College Sandhurst at the same time, she was in the intake above me) and her genuinely open and helpful personality, meant that when I scooted her a message to ask if she’s be willing to chat with me for the podcast, she said yes immediately!

Clare is currently serving as the Deputy Military Secretary at the Army Personnel Centre in Glasgow. With career highlights such as being Co-Chair of the Army LGBT+ Network, and REME Corps Colonel (2016-2018), you know she has some interesting stories to tell.

I knew it was going to be a great chat when her answer to my first question began “Well, that happened by accident, which I think is the beginning of all good stories…”

Here are some timestamps:

07:45 Historical women's role stereotypes.

15:43 Motivation theory: competence, autonomy, relatedness, self-determination.

20:12 Resilience in high- and low-trust environments impact.

23:26 Reflections and advice on workplace trust.

29:47 Building trust and connections to inspire others.

35:02 Appreciating great leadership and the loneliness of command.

43:11 Realization of sexual orientation, changes in society.

47:43 Connection between trauma, leadership, and LGBTQ community.

53:53 Trauma-informed approach acknowledges suffering, but voices matter.

59:23 Gratitude for healing in community after inquiry.

01:04:15 Questioning male leadership, exploring gender and authenticity.

01:09:58 Strive to be positive and consistent daily.

01:15:30 1-on-1 support for mental health and leaders.

S2.19: Midwinter Rituals: The Art of Nesting for Rest, Clarity, and Confident Action Planning

Fri, 26 Jan 2024 05:00:00 +0100

I saw a post recently that said “Have you missed your chance to set goals for 2024”… with a shudder I clicked onwards. No such negativity nonsense thank you!

We are still in midwinter (us Northern Hemisphere lot anyway) and this has a massively important role to play for our cyclical wellbeing… through nesting.

I've been exploring the idea of nesting as a valuable part of our midwinter rituals. It's all about the process of arranging our surroundings and thoughts to create a sense of security and comfort, and I believe it's an essential step before setting goals.

Join me as we explore how nesting can lead to gaining clarity, building confidence, and ultimately transitioning into action. I'll be sharing practical advice and exercises to help you take stock of your life and make deliberate choices about what to focus on as we move forward.

Here’s some timestamps:

00:00 Let’s demystify nesting and midwinter rituals.

05:31 Arranging thoughts and ideas for successful launch.

07:31 Reflect on life's progress; embrace change.

09:46 Assess all areas of life for clarity.

14:29 Choosing to not do things for now.

17:19 Work one-on-one, leader support, mental health.

As always, if you’d like support in moving through nesting and into preparation for goal setting for this year, get in touch. I have a number of different options at the moment so we will find something that works!

S2.18: The Self-Leadership Superpower of Creativity and Compassion with IFS Therapist and Trainer Ruth Culver

Fri, 19 Jan 2024 05:00:00 +0100

I came across Ruth Culver during lockdown, when I was simultaneously exploring Internal Family systems-Inspired Coaching, and Polyvagal Theory. Ruth has trained in both disciplines and had developed the Thrive/Survive spiral which I continue to find super helpful (you can download it free from her website, link below).

In chatting with her by email I discovered she’s very down-to-earth and last year I did one of her online “Intuitive drawing” workshops called Drawing Into Self which was simply beautiful as I got to work with her 1:1 as the demo client.

Here's a sneak peek of what's in store:

Shaking Up Trauma: Ruth dives into animal research on trauma recovery—turns out, a good shake can work wonders.
Breakthrough Therapy: Ruth champions a fresh healing paradigm, blending the 'survive thrive spiral' with polyvagal theory and internal family systems.
Unleashing Creativity: Discover the secret to unlocking creativity in leadership—spoiler: it's all about flow and regulation.
Emotional Validation: We're calling it a superpower. Validating emotions isn't just kind; it's critical to coping and thriving.
Mastering Self-Leadership: From group workshops to one-on-one sessions, Ruth and I unpack the power of self-guided growth within us all.
Body Wisdom: Ruth highlights the body's role in emotional processing—listen to that gut feeling; it's smarter than you think.

This is a gentle, soulful episode, timed into the middle of midwinter as we Northern Hemisphere folk tune inwards. Tune in to embrace innovation, nurture self-awareness, and lead with heart and mind in harmony.

Here are some timestamps:

00:00 Promoting physical and mental health for empowerment.

09:28 Effective use of intuitive drawing in groups.

10:37 Women lead communities, using drawing for peace.

20:29 Magic happens in non-judgmental, creative listening spaces.

21:29 Mediating conflicts using learned couple counseling skills.

30:04 Therapist explains use of neuroscience in therapy.

32:19 Adrenaline response, fight or flight, submission, defense.

37:59 Overcoming old beliefs to achieve personal growth.

42:31 Anxious and depressed amid different spaces.

51:22 Acknowledge and release overwhelming energy for well-being.

57:31 Modern attachment theory challenges Western social norms.

01:03:29 Support for leaders and teams with mental health.

To check out more from Ruth and download her Thrive/Survive Spiral head to her website here.

S2.17: 'Humankind' for Refreshing Leaders: Tempering Empathy and Training Compassion

Fri, 12 Jan 2024 05:00:00 +0100

“Temper your empathy and train your compassion”

This is one of Rutger Bregmans top tips for resolving the bias and friction that persist in the modern Western world.

It falls to leaders of all kinds to make changes everywhere that are so badly needed for fairness, equity, and progress of humankind.

I re-listened to Rutger's book, Humankind, over the midwinter break, and I was struck by how powerful and simple this message is.

Key Takeaways:

Distinguish empathy from compassion: Empathy involves feeling the pain with someone, while compassion entails feeling for someone, leading to constructive action, thoughts, and problem-solving.
Harness the power of compassion through meditation: Simple meditation techniques, such as lovingkindness meditations, can train the mind for compassion. Seek resources on platforms like Insight Timer, Headspace, and YouTube.
Embrace compassion in leadership: Leaders, including solo entrepreneurs, can benefit from cultivating compassion, fostering a controlled, constructive, and energized approach to helping.
How compassion can transform our approach to leadership and our overall well-being.

I loved it so much I bring it to life for you here with examples from the research and practical tips for you to use right away.

05:47 Civilization hangs by thin threads, but kindness persists.

08:52 Human evolution leads to natural empathetic tendencies.

13:39 Compassion drives action, thoughts, and problem-solving.

16:07 Train your mind with compassion through meditation.

20:05 Supporting leaders and teams for mental health.

For more from Rutger Bregman go to his website here.

To read my blog on why I picked this topic for this episode, and why this is relevant for Refreshing Leaders, click here.

S2.16: Pivoting with Purpose: From Army Officer to Strategic Corporate Security, Insights into Humanity in Leadership with Jules Parke-Robinson

Fri, 05 Jan 2024 05:00:00 +0100

Want to listen to a thoroughly inspiring person who is down-to-earth, real, and fun? Then you are in the right place!

I bring you my chat with Jules - mum, Senior Corporate Security Executive, family person, Tropic Ambassador, Trustee of Birmingham Symphony Orchestra and Chair of British Wheelchair Basketball… yet still completely relatable, funny, down-to-earth, and wise.

We go through a ton of stuff, here are some highlights:

🌱 Growth Mindset: Jules shares the aspirations for her children in their professional pursuits, emphasizing the significance of working in environments that foster empowerment, trust, and authenticity. This discussion extends into a broader conversation about instilling resilience and the art of pivoting in the face of challenges.

🎯 Leadership Goals: Drawing from a rich background including military service and corporate engagement, we delve into the nuances of leadership versus management, the journey of personal growth, and the search for satisfaction within one's work.

👣 Personal Reflections: Jules reflects on her transition from military to civilian life and the crucial need for leaders to prioritize self-work and inner reflection to shape an effective leadership style.

🔎 The Leader-Follower Dynamic: Both Kate and Jules ponder leadership’s pivotal role in creating growth-oriented environments, cultivating authenticity, and safeguarding team well-being.

🔄 Transition Challenges: Jules candidly discusses her struggles with work-life balance during the pandemic and the importance of setting boundaries, especially in a globally connected world.

💡 A Path to Empowerment: Jules’s upcoming role shift and excitement about new beginnings serve as a powerful testament to how personal adversity can seed future growth and confidence.

🧘‍♀️ Mindful Leadership: Don't miss out on the heartwarming segment where we explore self-awareness practices, managing stressors, and finding peace in the chaos of leadership roles.

We hope that you enjoy listening to this as much as we did chatting together!

Stressors - in Your Life?

On a personal note, I do think this episode highlights the many stressors and challenges that are especially faced by women in leadership roles (though this of course isn’t wholly restricted to women). In an unsupportive environment, these can lead to mental health issues. In great environments, we can stay stuck in cycles of perfectionism and self-doubt (yes, they feed one another).

I specialise in helping people identify their unhelpful thinking, to move beyond past adversities (and even traumas) to ease suffering and get the fun back… especially to get your inner fire re-lit in your work, personal, or family life.

If now is the time to sort this out for yourself, or provide this for your team, get in touch through LI or kate@katebrassington.com.

P.S. Do you have any questions for me or want to suggest a topic for future episodes? Message me on kate@katebrassington.com.

S2:15. Midwinter gift

Fri, 29 Dec 2023 05:00:00 +0100

In this special episode of Refreshing Leadership, I give you a unique gift—a guided visualization or meditation to celebrate the season of Midwinter.

Join me as I guide you through a beautiful woodland area, inviting you to connect with nature, rejuvenate your energy, and seek inner peace.

This solo episode is a refreshing and inspiring way to wrap up the year and prepare for the new year ahead.

Warmly

Kate

S2.14: Redefining Leadership Through Spirituality and Self-Discovery, with Fiona English, Speaker and Executive Coach

Fri, 22 Dec 2023 05:00:00 +0100

Fiona seems so fearless to me, as she navigates the intersection of human potential and spirituality.

With candor, Fiona reflects on her own life journey, shedding light on the intrinsic value of recognizing the unknown as an opportunity and the personal sacrifices inherent in embarking on a path to true leadership.

Her insights will provide us with a deeper understanding of how leadership is less about commanding others and more about understanding oneself.

Together, we'll get to the heart of what it means to be a leader today—discussing the importance of compatibility, the integrity in professional development, and the evolution from self-leadership to global influence.

Fiona's expertise leads us through the pivotal choices that shape a leader, the gradual process of transformation, and the challenges of staying true to one’s mission in times of uncertainty. It’s a conversation that promises to be as enlightening as it is empowering.

You can find out more about her on her website here.

Some approximate timestamps:

04:42 Awakening to spirituality and personal growth journey.

07:25 Reflect on phases of life, embrace change.

10:47 Sacrificing certainty for transformation and personal growth.

17:22 Embracing uncertainty for personal growth and success.

24:31 Coaching purposeful leaders for positive global impact.

29:49 Personal development essential for navigating career changes.

31:43 Questioning life norms, identity, and self-discovery.

43:09 Influenced by dad, encouraged, purposeful, strong legacy.

45:17 Desire for change and leadership in life.

48:43 Individual responsibility and leadership lead to impact.

54:17 Empowering leadership, taking responsibility, fostering innovation.

S2:13. When it is YOU that is in Shock or Sensory Overwhelm: How I Led Myself Through Shaking, Fear, and Pain Reactions During a Medical Procedure, and You Can Too

Fri, 15 Dec 2023 05:00:00 +0100

In this episode I’ve taken the risk of sharing a very personal and recent experience with you. Why? Because it required leadership, resilience, and self-care, and I could only get through it because of the knowledge and skills I now have.

My recent medical challenge of a surgical repair to my eardrum was nothing compared to an intense experience of somatic shock that happened during a follow-up procedure.

My story explores the primal conditioning that compels our bodies to hide illness and how stress can manifest in physical reactions like shaking. But more importantly, I'll reveal the coping mechanisms I employed—grounding techniques, therapeutic dissociation, and self havening—that helped me manage sensory overwhelm and navigate the challenges of a stressful medical experience.

Leadership isn't just about guiding others; it's also about managing our own reactions and advocating for our wellbeing. I'll discuss how understanding somatic shock is crucial for leaders and highlight the resources, including Peter Levine's work, that shed light on this important topic.

Whether you're a leader looking to foster resilience in your team, or someone facing personal self-leadership or family-leadership stressors, I hope this episode will go a small way to demystifying some aspects of self-care and personal advocacy. Not to mention vividly bring to life some of the stuff I’ve been talking about these last few months! (Check out my earlier podcast S1.03 The Emerging Concept that Trauma is Transdiagnostic.)

And here’s a wonderful essay by the lovely Liam Farquhar if you want to learn more on somatic shock and shaking (for stress release), with some embedded YouTube links of animals in the wild demonstrating therapeutic shaking too. Essay "Trauma Needs a Rebrand - Trauma, Psychedelics, Limitations of Our Existing Models, and Exciting Alternatives" by Liam Farquhar.

I continue to try and de-stigmatise trauma, the nervous system, and share with you as much as I can that the skills of understanding trauma, the nervous system, and self care, are intricately linked. Enquire about coaching with me on my website here, to start a conversation about how I could help you.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts on this episode of Refreshing Leadership!

Some approximate timestamps:

01:00 Intro and trigger warnings

07:57 Shaking can release blocked energy, says Levine.

11:26 Recent eardrum surgery and body's recovery.

15:42 Received calm care during medical treatment process.

19:05 Using dissociation to cope with overwhelming experiences.

21:18 Returning to the world after dissociation.

23:58 Growing awareness of neurodiversity and sensory processing.

26:44 Navigating somatic shock, self-care, and advocacy.

S2.12: Envisioning Leadership Success by Crafting Your Personal Vision with Maya Gudka, Executive Coach

Thu, 07 Dec 2023 05:00:00 +0100

Now here’s a fun episode - with executive coach Maya Gudka, who has a rich background at prestigious firms like Goldman Sachs and KPMG. She talks to us about her surprising journey from economics to executive coaching.

Maya sheds light on the profound impact of personal vision work that she has crafted through a blend of hard-earned experience coupled with academic approach to blending psychology, coaching, and her insider experience of the world of finance executives.

We explore relationship-building, organizational intelligence, and the significance of Hogan personality assessments, as Maya breaks down her coaching approach into three core pillars: personal vision, relational capital, and energetics, across the areas of well-being and career progression.

Get ready to explore the SCARF model for navigating uncertainties in a VUCA world, Maya's embrace of vulnerability and authenticity, and her fresh take on salary negotiation and stakeholder mapping. Plus, we'll unpack the nuances of coaching styles and the vital role of inner work and supervision for coaches.

Maya's wisdom extends beyond coaching into the multi-dimensional aspects of well-being and the changing landscape of job descriptions—she even provides free resources for those keen to learn more.

Prepare to be inspired as we discuss the raw power of not knowing, the importance of vulnerability in leadership and parenting, and the cascade effect of coaching on organizational communication.

Here are some timestamps:

00:00 London Business School offers diverse coaching experiences.

07:49 Seeking inclusion, found passion in coaching others.

13:03 Economist enjoys learning and diverse work experiences.

20:30 Overcoming obstacles, challenging traditional career paths.

26:25 Align personal and organizational visions for leadership.

29:18 Understanding self and others is key.

35:50 Clear vision, prioritization, and saying no effectively.

42:35 Understanding leadership beyond the use of jargon.

46:20 Coach supports leader in managing team stress.

50:32 Managing uncertainty in a VUCA world.

55:11 Balancing coaching, feminism, and workplace pay inequality.

01:01:11 Encouraging habit building, open communication, and reflection.

Hungry for more?

Watch Maya’s free masterclass on accessing the next level in your leadership journey: https://mayagudka.kartra.com/page/C-SuiteAccelerator

Connect with Maya on LinkedIn if you have any questions: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mayagudka/

Email info@mayagudka.com for free access to her glucose monitor course: https://www.udemy.com/course/glucose-monitor

S2:11. The Creative Leader: Unlocking Innovation through the Nervous System

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 05:00:00 +0100

Welcome to another episode of Refreshing Leadership!

In today's episode, I explore the connection between creativity and feeling safe in our environment.

Join me to learn more about the intricacies of our nervous system and how it responds to perceived danger, often hindering our ability to tap into our creative potential.

I chat about the importance of inner healing work and how it can help us break through obstacles and unleash our creativity.

I share insights from my conversation with artist Hannah Shergold, highlighting the role of intuition in the creative process.

Do enjoy this episode for a boost on your creativity and inner power!

S2.10: Shattering Norms: From Veterinarian, to Sculptor, to Military Helicopter Pilot, to one of the most successful self-representing artists in the UK - Hannah Shergold talks Passion, Leadership, and Mental Health

Thu, 23 Nov 2023 05:00:00 +0100

From using her anatomical veterinary knowledge as a professional sculptor, to flying military helicopters, to shaping her creative freedom as an artist, Hannah has a unique story to share.

This heartfelt conversation takes place with Hannah inside her studio, surrounded by her immense pieces of art, some not even been seen by the public yet.

We delve into topics like managing career transitions, understanding the role of creativity in personal fulfilment, and combating doubts and external pressures in the wake of success.

We unpack some challenging issues around gender differences, epigenetics and the role of narcissism in leadership. We also touch on our struggles with overworking, the impact of personal relationships on our work, and finding balance in hustle.

Hannah shares openly her experiences of managing mental health throughout a number of challenges in life, and speaks colourfully about raising awareness of just how much inner work can be needed, and how valuable it can be, especially for leaders, to know themselves first and foremost.

Some approximate time stamps:

03:09 Transitioned from military flying to art passion.

06:13 Passionate about flying, seeks fulfillment, not stagnant.

14:57 Transition from full-time captain to self-employed artist.

21:45 Acknowledging hard work, success, recovery, and balance.

27:22 Art enables but business requires unconventional creativity.

28:46 Planning art exhibition, considering costs and sponsors.

35:56 Finding freedom and bravery in the nervous system.

42:33 Method for retaining fluid, abstract style paintings.

50:03 Narcissism, difficulty recognizing traits in others.

51:26 Concern about personal image and charity success.

58:23 Stats show correlation between traits and jobs.

01:07:19 Honoring leadership traits and behaviors, research findings.

01:13:14 Supporting leaders and teams for mental health.

Since leaving the Regular Forces in 2018, Hannah has established herself in the international art world, with one-off paintings fetching up to £40,000. She is now an ambassador for Prince William’s African conservation charity, Tusk, and has raised over £309,000 for various charities including the UK Invictus Games Team, Born Free, the World Wildlife Fund and Tusk. Her work is in demand across the globe and now features in some of the most influential collections in France, Switzerland, Australia and Singapore.

For more see her website here.

S2:9. Navigating Leadership Challenges: Insights and Reflections from a Rainy Day in England

Thu, 16 Nov 2023 05:00:00 +0100

In this solo episode, I take a moment to reflect on the themes of connection, trust, and the impact of our nervous systems on leadership and personal growth.

I share experiences and insights from the October half-term holiday in England, wild swimming, and enjoying time with family… while my mind unpacked and worked through some of my recent ideas around the human side of leadership.

I muse through the diverse topics covered in recent episodes, from polyvagal theory and attachment in relationships to the role of anger and the importance of tuning into natural cycles.

As I invite you to join me on a journey of self-exploration, I also extend an invitation for leaders ready to make positive changes in themselves and their teams to connect and start the conversation. I’m booking clients now for January 2024!

So let's dive in.

‌Some approximate timestamps:

02:37 Creativity in the rain aka photos of my feet in the sea.

03:23 The joys of a good old English Sunday pub lunch

07:48 Connection - is everything

11:21 Leadership program, quantum physics, energy center connection.

14:16 Plan ahead if you are wanting to work with me in early 2024! You can grab your time spots now.

17:38 Mental health for leaders.

S2.8: Riding the Waves of Life: Managing Energy, Projects, and Personal Growth through Cycles, with Charlotte Friedrich

Thu, 09 Nov 2023 05:00:00 +0100

I am thrilled to introduce Charlotte Friedrich, a cyclical wellbeing expert, who will be sharing her insights on the power of cycles and their impact on our physiology and overall wellbeing.

Before we get started, I want to take a moment to share a bit about my friendship with Charlotte. We have had countless thought-provoking conversations outside of our Master's program, where we were the naughty ones that often found ourselves exploring new ways of approaching topics that extend beyond the traditional frameworks of positive psychology.

Charlotte has gone on to develop a unique wisdom and perspective that is a radical shift in modern day understanding of all the cycles around us, within nature, and out own bodies, on different places around the globe, to our cycles in life, love, and even work projects!

We chat through some of the connections we’ve made; between trauma, wellbeing, and the importance of leaders in all walks of life) understanding these natural patterns. Currently residing in the beautiful landscape of New Zealand, Charlotte's connection to nature runs deep. She emphasizes the interconnectedness of cycles in nature and how they can make us feel less alone, allowing us to be part of something larger than ourselves.

She challenges the traditional notion of linear time and invites us to shift our perspective to working with natural cycles and cultivating awareness rather than pushing against them. She talks us through how cycles are not only relevant in our personal lives but also in the corporate workplace. She expands on the concept of “Wintering”, those dark long nights of life and soul; that can be so connected to the actual Winter season in nature.

Of key importance to leaders, she gives us a refreshing context for the importance of rest and reflection and the consequences when these are disregarded.

So join us as we explore the world of cycles, from the connection between seasons and our physiology to the impact of cycles on our mental health and creativity.

Approximate timestamps:

[00:07:55] Learning from nature, not textbooks or theories.

[00:14:49] Seasonal and nervous system cycles affect us.

[00:19:52] Compassion for others, ourselves, and emotions.

[00:21:25] Trust in cyclical emotions energizes personal growth.

[00:26:48] Cycles play important role in human evolution.

[00:39:09] Understanding cycles can improve productivity and harmony.

[00:47:13] Menstrual cycles show different energy and seasons.

[00:54:16] Skipping cycles compromises well-being, understand holistic view.

[01:01:26] Endless cycle of high productivity and exhaustion.

[01:06:30] "Helping leaders balance mental health for thriving teams."

How to find Charlotte:
Website
Cyclical Wellbeing
Contact Charlotte

S2:7 Exploring the Intersection between Quantum Physics and Leadership: A Journey into Conscious Connection

Thu, 02 Nov 2023 05:00:00 +0100

Welcome to Refreshing Leadership, the show that explores the world of self leadership, leading others, and the psychology behind thriving and flourishing together. In this episode, we delve into the intriguing connection between quantum physics and leadership.

Yes, you heard that right!

Quantum physics is an emerging and exciting field that offers a way to bring together the vastness of space, the energy of all matter, and the connection between the two.

It is not just for astrophysicists, yet their work has profound implications for how we lead and coach in the modern world.

Last summer I was reading The Quantum Universe by Brian Cox and Jeff Forshaw. (Side note, my husband and I saw Brian Cox live in Belfast about 2 weeks before the pandemic closed everything down. He said many things, but what stuck in my mind was “we are all stardust”, backed up by an astrophysics lesson in why this is a scientific fact. Mind-blowing or what!).

Imagine my surprise then, as I start a ground breaking coach training called Leadership Reimagined… and session 1 is on…. Quantum Physics and Leadership.

Mind blown again! This time to realise that my instinct towards Refreshing Leadership is strong. And, I’m not alone.

Join me as I share my reflections and experiences from that session. We'll explore profound concepts such as the building blocks of matter, the vastness of space, and the wonders of consciousness.

So get ready to have your mind blown as we uncover how being a conscious leader is not only scientifically valid, but also essential for our personal and professional growth.

Approx time stamps:

[00:01:23] Leadership coaching with quantum physics; reflections shared.

[00:03:46] Quantum book challenges conventional scientific knowledge.

[00:06:53] Thrills, chills, fizzes - being part of Earth.

[00:13:12] Intuition, connection, action plan, achieving goals.

[00:15:35] Work towards clarity, unity, healing, innovation.

[00:18:08] Supporting leaders with mental health for success.

I am taking bookings now for 1:1 client work starting in December and January. I purposefully don’t work with many clients at once as I give my all to you for 6-12 months (or more!). When you work with me, I invest a huge amount of my energy and zest into you.

If you are weary of stale leaders in yourself, your life, or the world, message me to arrange a free chat to see if you’d like to coach with me to do something about it.

S2:6 Redefining Anger Management: Embracing Anger as a Motivating Force for Positive Change, with Tanya Heasley, Multilayered Entrepreneur and Doctoral Research Student

Thu, 26 Oct 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Welcome to another episode where we delve into the complex and multifaceted world of anger management with our special guest, Tanya Heasley.

Tanya challenges the notion of eliminating anger and instead empowers individuals to use this powerful emotion positively. We delve into the inspiring stories of Martin Luther King Jr., who harnessed his anger to fuel social change, and legislative victories such as the Animal Rights Act and Children's Act that were driven by the force of anger.

Tanya's own journey is an incredible testament to resilience and self-discovery. She navigated multiple misdiagnoses and eventually found out she has autism. Amongst other things, Tanya now offers private assessments for autism, using a combination of powerful tools and insights to provide individuals with clarity and a path forward.

But our conversation doesn't end there. Tanya's passion for revolutionizing the education system and creating a more nurturing environment for students and teachers becomes evident. We delve into the world of anger in schools, exploring how teachers' stress and anger can impact students' well-being and hinder their learning experience. Tanya's research and commitment to positive education shine through as she shares insights on reducing stress in classrooms.

As we unwrap the layers of anger, trauma, and neurodivergence, we also tackle the challenges of misdiagnosis, particularly in women, and the profound impacts it can have on individuals' lives. Tanya's journey of self-discovery and reclaiming her identity as an autistic person echoes the experiences of many who have navigated the complexities of being misdiagnosed or misunderstood.

Join us for an eye-opening and enlightening conversation where Tanya Heasley lays bare their experiences, knowledge, and passion for creating a more compassionate and understanding world.

Some approximate time stamps:

[00:05:03] Multilayered journey: psychology, teaching, coaching, counseling, anger management.

[00:09:49] Misdiagnosis led to years of psychiatric treatment; later discovered to be autistic.

[00:13:15] Horrible, dark time, mental health struggles, medication.

[00:17:11] Limited support for autism in early years.

[00:19:21] Private autism assessments pros and cons

[00:23:23] Coaching and therapy: important distinction for practitioners.

[00:29:02] Fascinating research on neurodivergent and trauma brains.

[00:35:43] Witnessing violence as a child, dealing with anger, helping young people cope.

[00:40:24] Discussing anger types, the impact on teaching, and the need for support and positive education.

[00:47:00] Understanding anger and using it positively for personal growth.

[00:50:08] Embrace pain and struggles, finding compassion.

S2.5 Stepping into the world of Refreshing Leadership, where purpose, trust, and connection matter

Thu, 19 Oct 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Drum roll please…. Revealing the new name for this podcast!

Welcome to Refreshing Leadership, the podcast that explores the intersection of neuroscience, leadership, and purpose. Dive into the world of trauma-informed leadership coaching and harness its wisdom to navigate uncertainty with confidence!

If you’ve been listening through the first season when it was called Moving Beyond Trauma, rest assured we are still going to be exploring the wisdom of trauma, especially what information transfers across to teach us about the Nervous System, both under pressure and in creativity.

And we are still going to be enjoying interesting and insightful conversations with amazing people, as we ease suffering and get the fun back!

🎯 Here are 3 key takeaways from this episode:

1️⃣ Trauma-Informed Leadership: Discover how trauma-informed leadership can transform your organization. By understanding the connection between our nervous system's response to danger and effective leadership, you'll be equipped to create a high-trust environment where everyone can thrive.

2️⃣ The Power of Interpersonal Skills: Explore why the most pressing issues at work are often interpersonal in nature, even in technical fields. Learn strategies to navigate challenging dynamics and foster meaningful connections within your team and beyond.

3️⃣ From Avoidance to Balance: Hear inspiring stories of individuals who have shifted from avoidant coping mechanisms to finding emotional balance and growth. Discover powerful techniques to develop emotional vocabulary and regulate your own emotions as a leader.

🎉 Join me on this exciting journey of continuous learning and growth as we explore the refreshing world of leadership.

🌱 Together, let's create positive change, ease suffering, and have fun along the way! 🌟

Listen to the episode now on your favorite podcast platform and let me know your thoughts in the comments below. I can't wait to hear from you! 🙌

#RefreshingLeadership #Podcast #LeadershipDevelopment #TraumaInformedLeadership #ContinuousLearning #Inspiration #EmotionalBalance #InterpersonalSkills #TransformYourself #TransformYourTeam #CreatingChange #EaseSufferingAndGetTheFunBack

S2.4 Coaching for Authentic Attachment with Elfreda Manahan-Vaughan, Integrative Trauma-Informed Coach

Thu, 12 Oct 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Ever noticed a repeating pattern in your romantic or work relationships? Do you fear being left out or left on your own? Do you feel crowded or suffocated in relationships? Do you find yourself struggling to find the right words to deal with a difficult person at work? Do you wish desperately for your dream partner, but find yourself growing older, still alone?

This week’s guest is Elfreda Manahan-Vaughan, an Integrative Trauma-Informed Coach. She vividly brings to life the world of adult attachment, along with how we can recognise and help ourselves (and others) with attachment injuries and wounds, in ALL our relationships.

Wherever we are in the world, we must engage with other people. And in that territory, lies hidden attachment wounds. In this episode, Elfreda and I unpack the importance of self-awareness. She distinguishes between attachment trauma and trauma itself, shedding light on how attachment experiences can impact communication and behavior in various relationships.

She delves into the neuroscience behind reactive behaviors and the factors that influence behavior, such as sensory issues, interactions with others, and one's own thoughts and emotions.

She touches on antagonistic behaviors in narcissistic individuals and the distinction between destructive narcissists and those who use narcissistic behaviors as coping mechanisms.

Elfreda emphasizes the importance of understanding one's own reactions and strategies as a starting point. She discusses various avenues for treatment, including therapy, coaching, and trauma support, highlighting the need to address specific sets of behaviors and their level of dysfunctionality rather than focusing solely on diagnosing specific disorders.

Some approximate timestamps:

00:02:45 Attachment wounds create adaptive responses in relationships.
00:05:21 Attachment needs for safe, functional relationships summarized.
00:11:43 Change, dynamics, uncertainty.
00:16:58 Inconsistent co-regulation leads to manipulative behavior.
00:21:28 Earning balance through resolved attachment trauma.
00:28:51 DMM analyzes communication about primary relationships—avoidance/emotion.
00:35:26 Coaching helps with thinking, reasoning, and planning.
00:37:25 Coercive strategy, awareness, balance, manipulation, difficulty, aggression.
00:47:15 Narcissistic behavior can be destructive and antagonistic, while coping strategies aren't always.
00:48:41 Coaching room conversation needs self-awareness, adaptability.
01:02:08 Psychological treatment can help with trauma, choice.
01:07:25 Moving beyond trauma brings hope and purpose.

Elfreda gave us these links to continue the exploration of healthy attachment relationships:
Website: www.metta-morphics.com; IG; LinkedIn; YouTube

The DMM: https://familyrelationsinstitute.org/dmm-model/

S2:3 From Trauma to Trust: Unleashing the Power of Uncertainty in Leadership

Thu, 05 Oct 2023 05:00:00 +0200

I've been having conversations and doing some deep thinking about the direction of this podcast and how it can best serve our listeners. As much as I love discussing trauma and its effects, I've been inspired to expand the scope of our conversations. Don’t worry, the wisdom of trauma and getting the most from our Nervous System will stay with us!

It's abundantly clear that the biggest threats to leaders are the ones that affect the bottom line and financial stability.

Perceived threat (you’ll recall) is what our Nervous System is scanning for 24/7. But, when we live on medium-high “alert” for extended periods of time, that’s when things can unravel.

As I dig deeper, I confirm that these issues are not just confined to the corporate space. They extend to our personal lives, relationships, and communities.

And I believe there's a common underlying factor: uncertainty. From international threats to technological advancements, there's no escaping it. And as the workforce evolves with different generations coming in, there's a need to adapt and navigate these uncertainties.

So, what does this mean for the podcast? Well, I'm considering a name change that reflects this broader focus on uncertainty and its impact on leaders and individuals alike. I'm bringing my two favourite hot topics together, and I'd love to hear your thoughts (for those who have already engaged, thank you!).

Uncertainty = Risk / Threat

🌟 For leaders, their personal risk includes their job security, livelihood, and the financial stability of their family.

🌟 For organizations, risk encompasses the bottom line, job security for employees, and meeting the organization's goals in the face of uncertainty.

This brings us to the role of a good boss. A good boss ... (fill in the blank for yourself, here's some options I've heard in recent weeks):

🔮understands the uncertainties and provides clarity, connection, and a safe space for their team to thrive;

🔮acts as a shield, buffering between the issues rising upwards, and sh#t rolling downwards!;

🔮doesn’t hide either the truth or their vulnerablility.

One thing this does NOT all mean is that a boss must pretend to know everything. No-one can do this and it's just high-level fakery.

So, join me as we delve into the challenges faced by leaders, the impact of uncertainty, and the vital role of a good boss. And stay tuned until the end as we discuss the potential new name for the podcast.

Get ready for an episode that will empower you to thrive in uncertainty.

Approximate Timestamps:

[00:01:50] Uncovering threats to leaders, corporate workers, entrepreneurs.
[00:05:27] Analytical thinking, unifying factor, risk in business.
[00:06:25] Moving from uncertainty to risk, both personally and organizationally.[00:12:12] Isolation, aggression, leaders facing uncertainty. What has this got to do with what we can learn from trauma?
[00:13:39] Healing from toxic environments and becoming leaders.
[00:17:58] Weaving wisdom of high performance and trauma. Excited for potential growth and unleashed power.

S2:2 Empowered Communication: Exploring the Why, Who, and When of Speaking Up with Dr Sarah Brooks, Voice and Silence Researcher

Thu, 28 Sep 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Dr Sarah Brooks has spent the last 10 years researching Voice and Silence in organisations. I was super pleased when she said yes to being a podcast guest.

Who “speaks” in organisations? Who’s voices are always heard? And who are always silent? And (the doozie) how can we make this better for everyone?

I’m delighted we had the chance to delve deep into the topic of cultivating employee voices and the crucial role of psychological safety in organizations.

🔑 Key Takeaways:

1️⃣ Psychological Safety: Fostering a culture of psychological safety is vital for organizations to unlock the power of employee voice. It enables individuals to freely express their thoughts, concerns, and ideas without fear of judgment or repercussions. Creating psychological safety, however, is not an easy task.

2️⃣ Polyvagal Theory - A science of safety and connection. We got right into the fascinating world of the Polyvagal Theory and its relevance to creating safe spaces for individuals to express their voices. The theory explores how our nervous system responds to threats and safety cues. At it’s heart is helping people learn how we can navigate our emotional and physiological responses, helping us feel safe and empowered to speak out.

3️⃣ Coaching for Empowerment: Whether it's one-on-one coaching or group coaching, both have their place in supporting personal and systemic growth within organizations and play a crucial role in empowering individuals to find their voices. It provides a safe space for self-exploration, overcoming barriers.

Much as you think we’d agree coaching is great (we both are coaches after all!), we did end up critiquing that coaching is not a one-size-fits-all solution, and organizations should consider various factors when implementing it.

I am incredibly passionate about creating environments where everyone's voice is heard and valued.

Let's continue the conversation on how we can build trust, empower voices, and drive positive change in our organizations!

Timestamps (approximate):

[00:02:05] Dr Sarah’s backstory

[00:09:29] Polyvagal theory: safety, fight, flight, freeze.

[00:13:18] Body's role in decision-making and communication.

[00:16:51] Creating safe workplaces through coaching and self-reflection.

[00:21:16] Three questions to start a meaningful conversation.

[00:26:24] Social engagement inhibits action; societal influence.

[00:31:15] Individual vs collective tension explored in research.

[00:34:05] Understanding employee voices to improve organizations.

[00:43:35] Coaching helps individuals overcome struggles and can be key in moving beyond trauma.

[00:47:35] Uncovering hidden issues and supporting therapy.

[00:51:47] Talk about the unsaid, find alternative expression.

[00:53:21] Limited research on embodied approach; connection to trauma and spirituality.

Continue the conversation with Dr Sarah on her website and LinkedIn.

#MBTpodcast #EmployeeVoice #PsychologicalSafety #CoachingForGrowth #LeadershipDevelopment #Empowerment #UnlockingPotential

S2:1. Introducing Season 2 of Moving Beyond Trauma: Unveiling the Power of Trusted Leaders; Spotlight on Women, Resilience, and Results

Thu, 21 Sep 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Welcome to S2 of the Moving Beyond Trauma podcast!

I am thrilled to be back with more episodes that explore the incredible power of the nervous system and how we can move from surviving to thriving in our lives.

In this episode, I will be giving you a sneak peek behind the scenes of what's been happening with the podcast and the exciting themes and guests we have lined up for this season. From women in leadership to the pressures faced by decision-makers, we will be delving into important topics that impact our mental health and well-being.

I will be sharing some fascinating insights from the interviews I've already conducted, including discussions on voice and silence in organizations, attachment theory, neurodivergence, spirituality, and so much more. It's a diverse range of perspectives that will challenge the way we think about leadership and the importance of mental well-being in the workplace.

One emerging theme that has stood out to me is the unique experiences of women in leadership roles. As a trailblazer myself (though I never saw myself this way until years later; none of us did), I have firsthand experience of breaking ground in male-dominated environments.

We will explore the differences in leadership styles, ponder how women can be better supported in their roles, and the importance of true diversity and inclusion in the workplace.

So sit back, relax, and join me on this journey as we navigate the complexities of trauma, uncover the power of the nervous system, and discover how we can all move beyond trauma to live our best lives.

Timestamps

[00:01:32] Summary: Behind the scenes updates. Exciting interviews on mental well-being.

[00:05:59] Leadership pressures, mental health, job satisfaction, women.

[00:07:20] Femininity was/ is not welcomed in male-dominated leadership.

[00:11:30] Exploring PhD on trusted leadership, and how women are the hidden leaders here.

[00:14:42] Moving beyond toxic leadership, creating inclusive change.

[00:19:10] Kitchen: heart of home, hub for connection.

[00:22:41] Coaching for change, leaders facing mental health.

#WomenLeadership #MovingBeyondTrauma #LeadershipMatters #WomenEmpowerment #InclusiveLeadership #TrustedLeaders #PurposeMatters

Summer 2023 Mini Series: Trust. (Rebuilding, living, and loving again after you have been let down. Some thoughts and ideas, with love, from me to you.)

Fri, 25 Aug 2023 05:00:00 +0200

How to trust and live again after being let down by someone close? This issue has been asked to me over and over again. In private messages, and client sessions, in workplace and intimate settings, in youth and in age, across gender, ability, and life experiences.

Trust really matters. To everyone.

How to gather yourself and move on without becoming a steel-walled fortress that no-one can get near (and as a result staying lonely and isolated)?

How to build inner trust in yourself, protect yourself, and move on?

I don’t have all the answers. By a long way.

I do have endless compassion for people hurt by this most ancient of human hurts.

These are me general thoughts on the matter… message me for a safe and understanding space to take a look at the trust issues you know you want to deal with.

Time stamps:

04:11 Psychological theories underpinning Trust - Shattered Assumptions theory

06:00 Even coaching about work and professional issues can often uncover deep trust issues from experiences in personal, intimate relationships

07:32 Fallible humans… and trusting them

08:00 But what if you should be listening to your trust protectors, because you are being abused or otherwise maltreated

09:00 Navigating vulnerability - with trust issues

11:00 A quick, thinking, exercise

14:30 Guilt, shame, when it is others that have let us down

15:00 Existential perspective on trust, groups, and belonging

17:00 Understanding primary and secondary pain

20:18 Brene Brown and Elizabeth Gilbert on Trust, vulnerability, creativity

Summer 2023 Mini Series: Sleep. (Sleep purpose, patterns, and problems. Top tips to improve your sleep.)

Thu, 24 Aug 2023 06:00:00 +0200

Sleep is often a massive issue with my clients. In my opinion, its one of the biggest factors affecting people’s well-being that I come across.

This episode is packed full of information and top tips around getting to the heart of your sleep patterns and ways to improve them.

[Disclaimer is that while I’ve studied, read, and learnt as much as I possibly can about sleep, I cannot say I am a sleep expert and urge you to seek medical advice if you are concerned about this or any other aspect of your health.]

03:00 Sleep has a major impact on performance in life

04:15 What the neuroscience of safety tells us about the function and conditions for sleep

06:00 Being active and being outdoors

07:00 Creating mental tiredness

10:10 What it takes to get properly comfortable

12:00 Handpicking your own sleep hygiene habits (warning, one size does not fit all!)

20:24 Sleep cycle knowledge

22:10 Tips and tricks

Summer 2023 Mini Series: Love. (What matters to you? How to shift your energy around love, even after trauma, heartbreak, or bad luck. Hope is an action. Let's do it!)

Wed, 23 Aug 2023 05:00:00 +0200

I recorded this on family holiday in the Dolomites, which seemed the perfect place, amongst incredible beauty and power of nature, crisp clean mountain air, and amazing views on every horizon, to talk with you about Love.

A big part of my work is inviting people to think more deeply and carefully about what matters to them.

While its no surprise to me that Love often shows up in this, the clients, especially executive corporate clients, are a little worried that this “isn’t for coaching”.

It is as if they were suddenly surprised how close the surface, and the deeper, parts of them actually are. But to me, there are “no small things”.

They then often need a sort of permission to go there. To explore. Because love matters the same as anything else that matters (or perhaps more? discuss!).

There’s no point being in the best role or location in the world, if inside your heart is broken, or struggling, or lonely.

I loved creating this episode for you, out of love and hope. Let me know what you think!

Timestamps:

3:00 When love shows up in a conversation about what matters

5:00 When a client begins to focus on inviting and upgrading the quality of love in their life… what a privilege to be part of such a vulnerable and powerful time in someone’s life

6:00 The different ways love shows up all around us

8:10 Working towards something you want in life, especially after trauma in that area, can take a heap of energy and faith. Yet it is paramount we stop the junk soundtrack in our minds and tell ourselves better quality things

11:15 Did you know Hope is an action? Yep, you need to get off your butt and do stuff, and hope will be right there

12:30 Decluttering, followed by curating a powerful space that invites love right in

18:55 Sharpening up your attention and your intention

Summer 2023 Mini Series: Fun. (The science behind why fun is good for you. The difference between fun and being funny. Some actions you can take.)

Tue, 22 Aug 2023 06:00:00 +0200

The reason why I do what I do, is to “ease suffering and get the fun back”.

Early when working with me client often ask about this:

Why is this supposed to be fun. Isn’t therapeutic “working on yourself” supposed to be hard?

(Who said it couldn’t be both at once, hard work AND fun?)

What if I’m not fun enough. Do you get bored, or think I’m no good as a client?

(There’s a huge difference between fun and being funny. Lets talk about Humour, Seriously, by Jennifer Acker and Naomi Bagdonas.)

What if I am sad. Isn’t it a bit of toxic positivity to make it fun?

(Absolutely, toxic positivity denies you your voice. It stops truth and authenticity. There’s no fun when this is happening, so it isn’t what I mean.)

And I reassure you. There’s a lot more to fun, than you might think. And I get to indulge myself, and you, by talking about it in this mini episode.

It is a medicine, a mood and mindset shifter, a release.

It is good for your mind and body (I share some lovely research into Heart Rate Variability).

It releases tension, stress, and resets our stress container - a vital tool for resilience.

Time stamps:

02:00 Working on yourself doesn’t need to be a real drag. I make it my mission to help you get the fun back.

03:10 The difference between fun and being funny

05:10 Professor Robert’s research on why fun is actually good for your mind and body

07:25 Noticing fun and savouring funny things in life

09:50 Making fun into a habit that sticks

Summer 2023 Mini Series: Chill. (How your nervous system can get stuck both ON and OFF, and what you can do to help.)

Mon, 21 Aug 2023 11:00:00 +0200

Summer 2023 Mini Series - Chill

I was asked “can the nervous system response be stuck both ‘on’ and ‘off’”… This mini episode is my answer, which you won’t be surprised to hear, if based on applied polyvagal theory.

This episode I get into a bit more detail on how this shows up in daily life and what we can do about it.

Time stamps:

01:39 Questions I get asked about feeling stuck on both a high energy and immobilised state

05:27 The role of emotion

08:00 Neuroception - sensing inwards

12:30 High performance states when you are at your best

21:00 High levels of stuck energy trapped by simultaneous “I must” and “I can’t” emotions and thoughts

25:00 Befriending your nervous system and getting to know yourself to help yourself

S1.22 Season 1 Big Ending! Giving People Permission to Talk About Moving Beyond Trauma. A kitchen-table chat with Podcast Producer Rob Lawrence.

Thu, 03 Aug 2023 05:00:00 +0200

This is the final episode of Season 1, which amazingly reached 20 episodes and over 1140 downloads (today)... But wait. Here's an episode with a difference.

In preparing this episode I wondered who, out there, has listened to each episode 2-3 times? Who knows the world of coaching and personal development inside out? Who sees audio the way other people see images? Who can grill me on MY experience of bringing this podcast to life… answer... Rob, the magician behind the scenes at Moving Beyond Trauma, the Podcast Producer.

The thing you don’t maybe know about Rob, is that he is Way More Than a Producer! His advice and support has helped me make the idea into technical reality… and this is where the magic lies.

You see, with Rob I could forget the tech and get on with the creative idea behind the show, which is to give people permission to have conversations about Moving Beyond Trauma, and to help people learn more about what it is, and is not. This episode is our end of season chat, reflection, and review. Join us behind the scenes.

My summary at the end of season 1 is this:

You’d almost say that trauma needs a re-brand as it carries that much stigma of brokenness, mental injury, failure, fear, pain, that you really want to call it something else.

But in my work, I go the other way. On purpose. I seek to educate and inform about what trauma is and is not, how it can affect anyone around you (7/10 adults according to the WHO).

Trauma is NOT what happened to you or your people. Yes, diagnostic tools often focus on the event as this stems from the medical model (hurt your back? First thing doctor asks is “what happened”).

Trauma is the REACTION inside of you that happened as a result. The event or experience could have been years ago, or 5 mins ago, and it will have shaken your world to the core. It might have happened gradually (chronic trauma such as in childhood abuse, first responders, racism, bullying) or in one moment (car crash or battlefield event, death of a loved one, diagnosis of illness).

The thing with Moving Beyond Trauma is that its not just a function of resilience (bouncing back) but also Post Traumatic Growth (tough times can indeed make us stronger).

Notice neither of these is a pathology approach (what's wrong with you) and instead the core of my work is what is “right” with you - because responses to trauma are natural and you can move on in life, to ease suffering and get the fun back.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for joining us in Season 1. I’ve already begun recording interviews for Season 2 which will go out sometime in September.

Don’t despair, over the summer there will be a mini series where I answer listener and client questions - on Chill, Fun, Love, Sleep, and Trust.

See you there!

S1.21 Making Sense of this Thing Called Life; Insights into Navigating the Human Condition and the latent power of Uncertainty - With Yannick Jacob, Existential Coach, Author, and Practical Philosopher

Thu, 27 Jul 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Life is beautiful, exhilarating and full of possibilities; it’s also complex, challenging and inherently uncertain… It takes courage to allow yourself to experience the whole spectrum of what life has to offer – “good” and “bad”, pleasant and uncomfortable, success and failure, happiness and anxiety. To not merely endure life, but to enjoy it in all its facets. [Yannick Jacob].

Yannick was my first ever formal coach trainer, and he’s also been my professional super-visor. I’m grateful to Yannick for the part he played in helping me begin to move beyond my own traumas, develop as a coach, and bravely explore the pull to do the trauma-informed work I now do. I’m so pleased to bring him to you here on Moving Beyond Trauma!

In training Yannick made it quite clear, it takes about 2 hours to learn how to coach; it takes a lifetime to learn how to think, reflect, behave and be effective at it! Even while he taught the nuts and bolts of coaching, I felt he was actually drawing us into an incredible world of how to think bigger, openly, humbly, challengingly, holding ever bigger spaces for the big conversations that matter.

Yannick and I both believe that coaching is a powerful a non-pathologizing support system to help people make sense of life and living.

In this episode we don’t talk much about coaching, we just dive in to the big issues that we and our clients deal with every day, and you can hear us sharing quite deeply from our own lives as we ask each other searching questions, trying to bring something more to our listeners.

Yannick is part of the teaching faculties at Cambridge University and the International Centre for Coaching Supervision, and the Course Director of the School of Positive Transformation’s Accredited Certificate in Integrative Coaching. Formerly Programme Leader of the MSc Coaching Psychology at the University of East London, Yannick now presents at conferences internationally. His book, An Introduction to Existential Coaching, was published by Routledge. Yannick founded and hosts Yannick’s Coaching Lab which gives novice and seasoned coaches an opportunity to witness experienced coaches live in action, and he hosts the Animas Centre for Coaching's popular podcast Coaching Uncaged, as well as his own podcasts Talking about Coaching and Talking about Coaching and Psychedelics.

Have a look at Yannick's website here.

S1.20 Going knowingly into the unknown; when tough times can also be good for you; with Paula Reid, Adventurer, Psychologist, and Business Leader

Thu, 20 Jul 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Paula Reid, Adventure Psychologist, is (amongst other intense experiences) the 3rd British woman to ski to the South Pole in 2014. We have her all to ourselves here in this episode where we talk through the sh*tty life situation that culminated in her decision to undertake the trip, along with inspiring insights into her approach to life.

Her Adventure Psychology strapline is “Going knowingly into the unknown”. I’ve always found it a good metaphor for life after trauma, because often the very way you see, know, and understand the world, has been tilted over and many things feel unknown, new, strange and tricky.

There’s lots we can “know” though, and Paula takes us through how she worked it out in the 7 weeks (with near unbearable nerve and skin injury to her thighs) it took her to get to the Pole. Her Cope - Survive - Thrive model is used by leaders all over the world who train with her to navigate the tough mental and physical challenges of leading businesses to success in current times.

She also shares some insights from her time in April 2023 volunteering in Ukraine with Siobhan’s Trust. And she hits the nail on the head - tough times can sometimes bring out the best in everybody, the trick is learning how to manage our energy and resilience over the long term.

I’ve not picked out any time stamps as Paula is a master storyteller, the episode flows beautifully. We cover:

Big Moments in Life (that boot you up the butt)
What resilience really is
Talking yourself through tough times
Dark sense of humour (getting the fun back anyway)
Moving Beyond Adversity
When the everyday is also an adventure

You’ll absolutely want to check out her stuff online, she’s done a TED talk and is on YouTube, she’s published five books including BOAT to BOARDROOM which uses the Global Challenge as an extreme case study and The 7 Racing Rules – Lessons for Winning in Business and in Life contains her top seven performance principles. Her most recent publication is Adventure Psychology: Going Knowingly into the Unknown, a psychology reference book published by Routledge…. and she is just inspiring to vibe with!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmuVyA__7eo

https://www.paulareid.com/

S1.19 Menopause, Muscles, and Me - Master Trainer Anna Stephens is back to chat about womens' issues that affect us all!

Thu, 13 Jul 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Not only is Anna one of the most upbeat people I know, but she’s got a ton of wisdom on navigating health issues specific to women - except the affect us all in some way or other!

Join us as we discuss rebuilding your body and mind from post-partum, (or injury of any kind including hysterectomy and more), through hormonal challenges that affect health and fitness, to menopause - and beyond!

You’ll know that a big part of my trauma story is the damage that happened in body and mind when I gave birth to child #1. I promise no gory details (no need to go over all that again) but I can promise that I get real with some of the challenges I have faced and how Anna has saved my body (and therefore also my mind, as I can exercise like never before!).

Here are some time stamps:

04:20 After baby body issues

09:25 Support for the post partum body

14:00 Exercises that can help you rebuild

19:45 Strength strength strength

35:00 Normal people (not celebrities!) bouncing back

45:00 Weight loss AND strength

51:00 Menopause

If you love her stuff you can find more here:

Website: https://anna-motion.com/

Insta: https://instagram.com/anna_annamotion?igshid=Mzc1MmZhNjY=

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/annamotion18

S1.18 I will, and I can, be myself again! Rebuilding your body and mind after injury, illness, and physical setbacks, with Anna Stephens, Master Trainer

Thu, 06 Jul 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Meet Anna Stephens Master Coach, and ex-Army buddy of mine who I first met in the summer of 1993 (how time flies eh!). She's always been the sunniest, most optimistic of friends, someone who genuinely refills my tank, so I was delighted when she overcame her own injuries and hang ups about running a business when she left the Army... and trained as an awesome personal trainer.

Like me, she was already working online when the pandemic happened, and she was a complete lifeline for many of us in her 3 x weekly fitness groups.

Best of all, she navigates illness, injury, and age, with tact and style. I've rebuilt my body with her help, over 12 years now since I was literally torn apart giving birth, after about 3 years of training with Anna, I can walk pain free up and down my 5-storey home, lift heavy and awkward loads. Best of all I have learnt how to enjoy training with heavy weights, to loud rock ballad music, the perfect reboot to my system given the nature of my work.

So it was a no brainer to us both that she'd come and talk to us about redefining yourself, and reconnecting with your body and fitness after injury or illness. We'll do a separate episode for women's health, post-partum, menopause and all that. This episode is for anyone who (Anna's phrase) has had a divorce from their knees or other part of their body, and wants to make amends!

Here are some time stamps:
02:00 Anna's story - 24 yrs in the Army
05:00 When you’ve pushed your body to it’s limits
06:20 Mental health and identity when you can't do your sport, exercise, or fitness
08:30 Where else do you get happy endorphins from?
10:50 Training after long term illness or chemotherapy
12:40 Your starting point is What Can you Do?
17:45 Training safely, on zoom, its a real thing!
19:50 You cannot out-train a bad diet
23:30 Mindset matters
29:00 Ambitious people being kind to themselves and their body - uhuh
31:45 View calories like savings in your piggy bank
35:47 The best thing? A proper walk every day. And 3 resistance sessions a week
39:00 Redefining yourself after injury/illness
42:00 Acceptance, kind words to yourself, and getting proper support

To continue the conversation with Anna you can find her here:

Website: https://anna-motion.com/

Insta: https://instagram.com/anna_annamotion?igshid=Mzc1MmZhNjY=

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/annamotion18

S1.17 Living WITH trauma can suck. Moving BEYOND trauma can bring back hope, optimism, and even rekindle your fire. Here’s some of my emerging reflections and ideas from Season 1 of Moving Beyond Trauma so far

Thu, 29 Jun 2023 05:00:00 +0200

I couldn’t wait until the end of the season to draw together my reflections and ideas from Season 1 of my very first ever podcast, Moving Beyond Trauma!

It’s been by far the most radically creative thing I’ve ever done, and wonderfully affirming - I’m not alone, everywhere out there are people quietly moving beyond their own trauma, and helping others do the same.

Here’s what came up:

1. Stats! Buzzsprout produces a ton of analytics and I’ve been surprisingly mesmerised by seeing behind the scenes of a podcast! How many times has it been downloaded? Which guest was listened to most? Where in the world are people listening?

2. Here’s 4 Things I’ve noticed about Moving Beyond Trauma:

The Thing that no-one tells you about moving beyond any trauma;
Hero’s in the Journey are never alone (and how this really feels on the inside);
Intentionally curating ALL areas of your life is the most effective way to do that elusive “self care” that is essential for wellbeing - and what happens when you are so in flow and focussed on your goal that you forget to do this;
Be your own Action Friend (the cavalry are not coming, step up and take your own lead!).

3. Some very personal reflections and thoughts as I am so incredibly grateful to have created this amazing thinking space, and been joined by so many wonderful people to be interviewed, and you, the listeners, all around the world. It matters to me.

Thank you.

S1.16 "There's no health without Mental Health" - Looking after your Stress Container; looking out for those around you; and listen twice more than you speak! With Andy Elwood, Mental Health First Aid Trainer

Thu, 22 Jun 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Not only is Andy Elwood a Mental Health First Aid Trainer, but his experience as a helicopter rescue paramedic (both civilian and military) gives him a powerfully down-to-earth approach to mental health.

He goes so far as to say that there is no health without mental health, and that he firmly believes he saves more lives now, by training people in mental health first aid, than he ever did in his earlier career.

His unique approach to communicating with men is driven by the fact that men are three times more likely than women to end their life by suicide. Despite Andy’s various awards for physical courage, he believes his bravest action has been to talk openly about his own struggles and vulnerability, in order to find a way through three very different challenges during his lifetime.

Andy is honoured to be an ambassador for Movember. Since HRH Duke of Cambridge attended Andy’s Mental Health workshop, at the UK Search and Rescue National Conference in 2018, he has been engaged as a speaker by organisations such as University of Cambridge Medical School; Jacobs (construction industry); Scottish Mountain Rescue; Emergency Services Show (NEC) and Mind Blue Light Programme.

I’m delighted that he has joined us to talk in vivid and practical ways about how he has Moved Beyond Trauma, and every day helps more people to do this too.

(And for those of you who say you don’t think I sound very Northern Irish - this podcast gives you an idea of how I talk when I’m back home, or I've had a wee drink!)

Here are some time stamps:

6:45 - How Andy’s real-life, vivid experiences, help him know what works for people

11:55 The Recovery Journey

14:30 Three things you can say to almost anyone whom you are giving Mental Health First Aid to

14:50 Men’s Mental Health - key messages

23:05 Using your senses for better mental health every day

28:15 How mental health is continually changing within us, and how we continually adapt and change strategies to move forward

28:30 The Stress Container Model

40:23 Simple ways to be a Mental Health First Aider every day of your life to help those around you

46:05 Increasing your resilience

50:35 Mental Health First Aid training isn’t new, its been around for 20 years and over 5 million people worldwide are thought to have been trained in it

You can find out more from Andy on these links:

Email - chinwag@AndyElwood.com

Web - https://www.andyelwood.com

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/andy-elwood-773457100/

Blogs:

https://www.andyelwood.com/how-do-you-de-stress-recharge-your-batteries/

https://www.andyelwood.com/what-to-say-to-someone-who-is-struggling/

https://www.andyelwood.com/how-to-have-a-conversation-about-suicide/

S1.15 Love Going to the Dentist? How one woman's trauma-informed practice is powerfully changing dental experiences for neurodivergent and neurotypical children - and their parents. In conversation with Dr Sarah Frasch Gregor, Paediatric Dentist

Thu, 15 Jun 2023 05:00:00 +0200

After a truly terrible experience, I urgently needed a dentist who would not cause more trauma to our daughter. By absolute luck, I found Dr Sarah, and I was so delighted with the experience we got from her I asked her if she’d be our podcast guest!

A trauma-informed world, imo, learns from the voices of people who have experienced it… and like any other learning, its power comes from being turned into action. In some way, we can make life better for ourselves or others, every time we digest a bit more.

Dr Sarah absolutely embodies this - she developed her own trauma informed paediatric dentistry practice not only to support children (and adults) who have been traumatised to get the care they need without being re-traumatised; but to one step further and develop skills to reduce or stop trauma occurring in the first place.

Not only this, but a huge number of her patients have special needs, they are hyper-sensitive, or have autism, or are neuro-divergent in some way. She says it is these patients who teach her what they need.

So in this conversation we explore how come she started on this journey, and how her steps have led her to be (currently) the only trauma-informed paediatric dentist in Luxembourg!

Here’s some timestamps:

04:00 How Dr Sarah developed her skills

07:45 the power of a positive dental experience, especially building trust

12:15 How hypnotherapy techniques have helped Dr Sarah and informed her work

15:00 Breaking trauma cycles every day (dentally-traumatised parents, this is for you!)

19:10 Dentistry for autistic children with significant support needs

32:15 Three golden rules: Don’t lie. Listen deeply. Learn from the person in front of you.

Bonus: In this podcast I mention the Connected Kids meditation training I completed - this is a highly trauma-informed approach developed initially for children with additional and special needs (though I use it with my kids and with many of my clients). Many of the techniques Dr Sarah describes are like those I learnt - if interested, you can delve into any resources on that here.

You can find out more about Dr Sarah below:

Kidssmile
6, Cité Herrenberg
L-6679 Mertert
00352 26 47 441

She's on Instagram: @kinderdentista

CHEM in Esch-Sur-Alzette:
https://www.chem.lu/trouver-un-medecin/dr-sarah-gregor

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZI2xteq3Prc&t=1s

S1.14 Acting Confident, taking the Lead (pun intended!) and boosting your self esteem… in conversation with Andrew Piper, Actor and Positive Psychologist

Thu, 08 Jun 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Andrew is an Actor and a fellow Positive Psychologist, and I am delighted that he agreed to come and share top tips with us on Acting Confident, taking the Lead (pun intended!) and boosting your self esteem.

What I love is that every one of his tips are based both in the school of acting and Positive Psychology.

Acting is not faking something, but it is about becoming someone else, for a time, for a role, for a reason.

In life, especially in stress, we may need to play a role, even on a bad day. Such as advocating for yourself at the doctor, asking for help for the millionth time as a single parent, meeting with he teacher to increase support for your child, pitching a contract for your business… you name it, there’s plenty of meetings we would rather not have… but we must do.

Here’s a couple of time stamps, but it was quite a free flowing conversation so you may just enjoy Andrew’s warm voice and anecdotes all the way through!

04:08 Feel overwhelmed at a party or big roomful of people? Give yourself a job (role) to play and start being of service to others. The serotonin and oxytocin will make you feel warm and fuzzy while the adrenaline buzz will make you feel top of the world!

08:00 Suddenly gone blank? Zoned out while someone is talking? Some tips on staying present and connected.

12:00 Wearing a “mask” in a good way, whether to get over shyness and have fun, or to give yourself space after rejection (and a wonderfully colourful drag story to illustrate this).

19:31 Use of props - food, items of clothing, etc, to give yourself a way to calm and ground so you can re-focus on the person or job in hand, and even to retrain a bad habit.

34:28 Feeling stressed when you need to perform is healthy, its called eustress and is your friend! Speaking at an event? Pick one person at a time and talk to them, then another, then another. Humans don’t get fear triggers when they talk just to one person as when faced wtih a small group, so break it down. A brilliant side effect is that the nervous systems in the room will regulate together, and you’ll feel connected and interested, even if you don’t know why!

To continue the conversation with Andrew you can email him andrew@betterpictures.co.uk or twitter @‌AndrewPiperUK

S1.13 Free up your mind! De-clutter, create fresh space, find your identity, and more… The “Psychology of Home” unlocked; Part 2, with Caroline Rogers, Professional Declutterer

Thu, 01 Jun 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Free up your mind! De-clutter, create fresh space, find your identity, and more… The “Psychology of Home” unlocked; Part 2, with Caroline Rogers, Professional Declutterer

Caroline and I unpack more of the psychology that underpins why we don’t say someone is “houseless”, we say they are “homeless”. There is enormous psychological power that lies dormant and unnoticed, simply in the very act of curating the spaces where we live.

Caroline tartly points out that for many centuries now, in many cultures, the act of cleaning and taking care of the home has been diminished and minimized. Instead, she draws out how these very activities can boost and uplift our wellbeing, sense of identity, safety and security.

Here are some time stamps to guide you:

2:032 How trauma is very present in the work of declutterers

4:45 Sharing your darker stuff with a complete stranger - the parallells between decluttering and trauma-informed coaching, as companions or allies as you work through your "stuff"

9:35 How clutter and hoarding (or living in a full home) are connected but very different and why we tread lightly

11:30 Clutter, and tidying children's possessions. Possessions and toys as sensory support to help create a grounding safe space.

15:00 Who do you let touch your stuff when you are decluttering?

21:28 This is a gentle and self-compassionate action, caring for yourself by curating your home space

31:23 Caroline's top tips on how to get started!

Also in this episode we mention Maya Gudka’s podcast interview that Caroline did with her recently on decluttering in your work life - in fact there are 3 episodes and you can catch them here.

Continue the conversation with Caroline on her website Room To Think here

S1.12 Free up your mind! De-clutter, create fresh space, find your identity, and more… The “Psychology of Home” unlocked; Part 1, with Caroline Rogers, Professional Declutterer

Thu, 25 May 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Mental baggage is something we all have. I find that in my trauma-informed work, it is often reflected in other areas of life. Having a good clear out is something I regularly did to clear my mind, long before I studied psychology!

For myself, now in my 30th home in 23 years, and an ex-pat, I have experienced first hand the power of making my family home anywhere. On purpose, I create it into a “den” where we can all retreat to, to reboot. Some of the clutter is highly important, objects that help us remember who we are and where we come from. In my home, visitors can know me/us, within a few moments of walking in.

So when I met Caroline Rogers on my MSc program, I was thrilled that someone was studying the science of the Psychology of Home! Psychology is often criticized for being too much about what is in the mind, and not the body. Take this one step further, and it also can be criticized for being too much about the individual, and not the community/system that they live in. And so too, our homes are an reflection of that physical and mental space we inhabit Why ignore it?

And so (says Caroline) by curating a home space, we can actively support ourselves whether that is simply to boost our mental health, or when we are digging deep to recover from mental injuries and the wear and tear of life.

Here are a few time stamps:

3:00 Why Caroline's work is fundamentally connected to helping people work WITH, not ON their pasts, while curating a nurturing space to live in

3:23 The science and research behind the Psychology of Home

11:00 Are our possessions are clutter, or treasure?

17:00 curating a home anywhere, for expats and others who move regularly

29:38 Home curating is not a menial, trivial or gendered task, but fundamental to our well-being

Part 2 to follow, on practical and fun ways to make this happen!

Continue the conversation with Caroline on her website Room To Think here

S1.11 Unlocking the healing power of the Mind-Body-Spirit connection with osteopath and yoga teacher Philippe Bauler

Thu, 18 May 2023 05:00:00 +0200

I love my visits to Philippe, my osteopath, as we have so many deep and interesting chats about the body-mind complex (as you do!). Recording this interview was delightful and fun.

Philippe is 34, an osteopath and yoga teacher based just north of Luxembourg City. He has 2 young children and his wife, also an osteopath, is training to be a doctor.

He has a very practical and compassionate approach towards the body-mind connection, gently helping people with their physical pain and suffering. I only discovered he was so spiritual by asking him some questions - he keeps it very discreet and is respectful that not everyone is in this place.

Yet his view that there was indeed a body-mind connection grew from his teen years when he discovered and got interested in observing this connection between the body and mind, that pain and physical suffering can indeed have roots in our mind and brain, and vice versa.

In this conversation he brings us along his journey from body, to mind, to spirit, and how he uses this in his work. It is a free flowing conversation, but here are some time stamps:

05:16 Yoga perspective on the body-mind complex

10:44 Inner growth is not linear!

19:40 Why yoga is not just something you do on a mat, but a practical skill you can take into all areas of your life

21:55 The body teaches us to move patiently and gently through all types of growth and healing. It cannot be forced.

27:34 The balance between taking it seriously, and NOT taking yourself too seriously! How a light and curious approach, within and without, serves us well.

Most of my clients at some stage ask themselves some existential questions like why me? what is this learning for? what is next? who am I really? Some get a sense that not all answers are inside themselves, for some people, connecting to energy or consciousness much larger than themselves can be bring hope, peace, a sense of perspective, and so on. Some find themselves moving steadily on a path of discovery as they do this.

I want to stress that in this podcast the word spirituality is not synonymous with religion.

The Body Keeps the Score (Bessel van der Kolk) and we can learn so much and assist our ability to Move Beyond Trauma so much more, when we bring the body, mind, emotions and spirit into the equation!

I hope you enjoy listening as much as we enjoyed the live conversation. To discover more about Philippe or contact him please go to https://www.osteopathiebauler.com/

S1.10 The Road of Trials: from ordinary to extraordinary, a Hero's Journey to overcoming challenges. Part 2 with Dina Grishin Career and Life Coach.

Thu, 11 May 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Welcome to the second of two interviews with Dina Grishin, Life and Career Coach. In this 2-part conversation we got right into The Hero's Journey (Joseph Campbell) and how it provides a practical pathway alongside Jung's Theory of Individuation.

In this episode we explore how the Hero is not alone (isn’t that great news!) and how help can come in a series of different guises, allies, mentors, and fellow travellers.

When we step back from the struggle, we can see back along the pathway how far we have come. And sometimes we can see ahead (a little way) to where we are going. The Hero’s Journey offers a compassionate and inspiring way to view modern life, and Dina has some great tips for us here.

This is for you on any journey through life, it doesn’t have to be career (its just a biggie that people often want help with) but have fun looking at your relationships, where you want to live, the Big Issues that matter to you through this lens too, and see where you can identify your allies and helpers along the way.

The image of the 12 steps of the Hero's Journey are within this blog - https://skift.com/2016/10/28/the-heros-journey-a-human-framework-for-building-modern-travel-brands/

And we especially love this infographic that Sarah McGuire made, showing the 6 most famous hero movies and the 12 steps for each of them - https://venngage.com/blog/heros-journey/

Find Dina here https://dinagrishin.com/

And if you missed Part 1 where Dina explains the scientific and historical basis behind the model, catch it here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2144758/12736793

S1.09 The Road of Trials: from ordinary to extraordinary, a Hero's Journey to overcoming challenges. Part 1 with Dina Grishin Career and Life Coach

Thu, 04 May 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Dina Grishin is a Life and Career Coach, and in this 2-part conversation we got right into The Hero's Journey (Joseph Campbell) and how it provides a practical pathway alongside Jung's Theory of Individuation.

Career stuckness, whether for your very first paid employment, a new graduate, seasoned employee wondering if there is more to life, budding entrepreneur forging a new path that you love but are unsure of, or business owner setting direction and leading decisions for establishment and growth, can take many forms, and Dina brings the problems and solutions to life for us here through this powerful yet very compassionate lens.

We recommend having a look at these two links alongside listening to this episode:

The image of the 12 steps of the Hero's Journey are within this blog - https://skift.com/2016/10/28/the-heros-journey-a-human-framework-for-building-modern-travel-brands/

And we especially love this infographic that Sarah McGuire made, showing the 6 most famous hero movies and the 12 steps for each of them - https://venngage.com/blog/heros-journey/

Find Dina here https://dinagrishin.com/

To listen to more on the fascinating topic of Moving Beyond Trauma, you can find the podcast here https://movingbeyondtrauma.buzzsprout.com.

S1.08 Living with chronic illness or injury - with Keith Mayers

Thu, 27 Apr 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Chronic Illness is a gritty area of coaching psychology. People with chronic illness have likely grappled with existential themes, explored their own meaning and purpose, and pondered thoughts like "why me". Keith has survived two severe near-death illnesses and this completely changed the tracks of his life.

He's a skilled practitioner and researcher and specialises in helping people move on in life, with (alongside) their illness. In this episode we unpick his personal motivators, his favourite theories that help him and his clients, and the online community he is building for people going through chronic illness.

Here are some time stamps:

01:38 Getting interested in psychology at school

03:44 The "proper beginning", struck by severe rare illness, Wegeners Granulomatosis or Granulomatosis with Polyangitis, a type of vascular disease which is auto-immune

13:52 Getting to know the real me

17:00 The second chance - what inspired him to do psychology is knowing he could use his experiences to help people

21:18 Learning narrative therapy firstly to make sense of his own past, and then to create a new future going forward

22:37 Struggling with sounding academic and "wonky" yet determined to build a positive community for people with chronic illness

29:10 Deep dive research into career identity loss, as personal story and narrative as a whole

32:30 Working with (not on) anxiety, health anxiety, depression

33:20 Social comparison (its a problem)

35:50 confidence and self motivation using visualisation and clarity

39:30 Working towards goals - not always linear pathways

Keith says:
"I am guided by the core belief that even if we lose what we once had physically, we can still grow intellectually, mentally, and emotionally. A challenging life is not necessarily a catastrophic one. We may not live as fully as once did, but our lives can still have value, meaning and purpose. We might just have to be more creative in how we find it."

You can find Keith on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/illnesscoachingpsychologist/

and LinkedIn
linkedin.com/in/keith-mayers-chartered-coaching-psychologist-34684ba

Thanks for listening!

S1.07 Boost your confidence, be seen AND heard, save energy and time, Part 2 with Tracey Moys

Thu, 20 Apr 2023 06:00:00 +0200

This is Part 2 of my conversation with Tracey Moys, House of Colour Chattanooga-Hixson. (Check out Part 1 to find out about inner and outer confidence, how the two work together, and how it can save you heaps of energy, time, and boost your self confidence).

In this episode we get down to business. How, exactly, can we be seen AND heard and remain comfortable in our own skin?

What if we really don't want to get visible, but we need it for someone else's sake, like our child, parent, or loved one?

What if your past life experiences (traumatic or otherwise) have left you quietly doubting yourself, keeping things moderately safe and small, but you realise it is exhausting?

What if you've had a sudden change in your life - realised its time to find your life partner, get a new job, leave your job, get a raise, move country... these are big, out-of-the-ordinary challenges that people face every day - Tracey will help you do it within your own style, comfortable in your own personality, yet save you time, energy, and boost your self confidence.

Let's face it, we all know how to be invisible, nobody needs a podcast on that! So in this episode Tracey gives us some practical tips for using the universal colour that suits us all, to be seen and heard where it matters.

At one point she flips it and asks me some questions so you get to hear a bit of my own discovery of how to understand and present myself from the inside to the outside.

Here's some time stamps:

2:26 We do all need to be visible, if we live in this world, yet we might not be in a great place inside. But we can't avoid going out, we have to do things, so its much better to do this while in control

3:57 How the need to be visible can be different, but still challenging, for men and women.

5:15 The world of online dating - its the modern way to meet people, and it demands a visual presence. This is as scary for men as women!

6:00 How Tracey has helped trans clients too, just being comfortable in their own skin, being themselves

7:10 Easy tip 1: Flip your black to navy to improve your professional appearance

7:50 Dressing for authority and how to use clothes as armour and accessories for protection, when we need that boost

12:25 Tracey flips into interview mode and asks me some searching questions about her own experiences

15:26 How to focus on your communication (zoom box!) area

15:55 The bio-psychology science why red is the game changer

18:30 You can't be heard unless you are seen

Here's a video to bring these practical tips to life as Tracey does a demo on intentionally going from invisible to visible - you can do this, in control, to make your life easier!

One thing you can do right now to get seen AND heard, on your terms, with Tracey Moys House of Color

To continue the conversation with Tracey go on to:
@houseofcolour_traceymoys
http://Facebook.com/hoc.chatt.hixson
https://www.houseofcolour.com/index.php/stylists/tracey-moys-north-chattanooga-tennessee
http://LinkedIn.com/in/traceymoys

S1.06 Boost your confidence, be seen AND heard, save energy and time, Part 1 with Tracey Moys

Thu, 13 Apr 2023 05:00:00 +0200

If you follow me for a while you'll know that I talk a lot about inner AND outer confidence. Inner confidence is my bag. I use coaching psychology to help you understand what it is that is pulling down your inner soundtrack (yep that voice in your head that doubts you can do a bunch of stuff), and how to fix it.

Tracey Moys is a professional who helps people project outer confidence. With her help I began to shift how I looked on the outside, to match who I was on the inside. My business took off, and I made my first annual turnover that outshone the highest salary I'd ever earned back when I was an employee. Better, than that, I got back a load of energy.

We believe in this so much, we decided to run a program to give something back to women leaving military service, as the service-leaver statistics show that this group especially struggles with finding identity and confidence. Both of us have first hand experience of this. We took on a pilot group of 6 women in our program At Ease... and it worked. Each of those ladies now has made a powerful shift in both inner and outer confidence.

In this episode Tracey talks about what brought her to become a House of Colour consultant, and how she grew her business and expertise in Cornwall, England, and now (since moving back home) from Chattanooga Tennessee. Tracey is open about how learning the language and framework of personal colour and style gave her a way to understand herself, express herself, and how it helped her move beyond trauma.

Here are a few time stamps to guide you:
3:20 Giving people a framework from which to dress confidently. After all, you are going to wear some clothes every day, so why not know how to make them work for you!
8:10 How COVID was the catalyst for some inner work
12:08 How inner confidence and outer confidence are a balance, if you take either one too far you can start to feel horrible inside usually like you are fake, or that you aren't worth it.
16:15 Tracey helps you understand the framework, but the client gets to do the work so they can evolve
21:15 The Seven Ages of Woman (and how this framework can help men, and trans people, too)
23:30 Why this is not fashion, but sustainable personal style. How dopamine dressing can help uplift yourself and the people around you
27:00 Tracey tells us the one universal colour that we can use immediately, any time, to make a shift in our energy

Join us for Part 2 when Tracey gives top tips and a practical session on how to use that red! And because this stuff is visual and practical, check out the YouTube video we made for you to see for yourself how easy it is to get visible, when you need to be, TODAY.

One thing you can do right now to get seen AND heard, on your terms, with Tracey Moys House of Color
To continue the conversation with Tracey go on to:
@houseofcolour_traceymoys
http://Facebook.com/hoc.chatt.hixson
https://www.houseofcolour.com/index.php/stylists/tracey-moys-north-chattanooga-tennessee
http://LinkedIn.com/in/traceymoys

S1.05 "You be you" Life after coming out in the 80s in Israel, a moving conversation with Saar Maoz, LGBTQ+ Activist

Thu, 06 Apr 2023 05:00:00 +0200

Saar is a dear friend, LGBT+ activist. When I first met him almost 20 years ago we were living and working in London together, I was so interested in how openly he talked of his experiences growing up as a gay man in a Jewish community kibbutz in Israel. He has had an extremely colourful life and he has a bubbling infectious laugh and wickedly dry sense of humour (you'll hear it in the interview). He came to our wedding in 2006 and bear hugged me afterwards full of joyful tears saying "It was so beautiful, I cried and I cried!", which made us both laugh and cry all the more!

There is little point in me, a straight ally, talking of how growing up homosexual in a aggressive world can be traumatising. Neither Saar nor his community need "spoken for". The LGBT+ voice is loud and proud, and I hope you too will be as moved as I was to hear Saar share some of his deepest moments with us in this episode. Just like many other area that have seen progression in recent years, we can celebrate progress but the work is not "done". Please share this onwards with people you feel might be helped in any way to speak out for themselves or those around them.

I've put some time stamps below to help you navigate, though it was a free flowing conversation so some are approximate:

2:40 Many different challenges in his life, but for this conversation Saar talks to us about coming out as a gay man raised in a Jewish Kibbutz in Israel in the 1980s

4:40 The first time Saar saw a character in a book or film that he could identify with (watching Dynasty with mum) and he learnt from his mum, who he was very close with, that he "could be anything in life just don't be gay".

c8:00 growing up and going to a community school that served the nearby Kibbutzes, exploring sexuality in the face of fear

c15:00 Considers there is something wrong or broken about himself because he didn't want to be with girls, and yet boys who liked boys

c17:00 By the last year of school age 18 he was wholly depressed, introverted, the world was unbearable as he couldn't be himself, because the message was "you don't be you, you be us"

c21:00 Joined Israeli Paratroopers for his National Service to please his dad, but it was a very tough time.

21:53 After about one year in the Army, he was home for the weekend on leave, and his mum confronted him "are you a drug dealer or a homosexual".

c30:00 the connection between hiding, being "dragged out", the guilt and the shame

41:55 Saar's 2 pieces of advice. You be you. find people who love you for you. you do you. Find a bunch of people who love you.

S1.04 Understanding trauma-sensitive mindfulness after burnout, trauma, or long-term stress

Thu, 30 Mar 2023 20:00:00 +0200

This is one of my favourite topics. Because mindfulness after trauma, burnout, or long-term stress can be very tricky. You can end up feeling worse, reactivated, or even triggered.

In this episode I introduce you to the work of David Treleaven, the developer of the Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness approach, and share with you how I combine it with Internal Family systems-inspired coaching (the pioneer of this method is Dr Dick Schwartz) to help my clients move forwards and learn to enjoy peace of mind again.

S1.03 The emerging concept that trauma is transdiagnostic

Thu, 23 Mar 2023 05:00:00 +0100

Welcome to this episode where I look at the emerging idea that trauma is not an illness or a broken-ness, but is in fact "transdiagnostic"... it goes outside, and across specific diagnoses and pathologies. When we see it in this way, we get some insights and freedoms open up.

03:05 Polyvagal Theory - How this amazing nerve, the longest in our body, keeps us safe through fight, flight and freeze response when it senses danger, and how trauma is a body, not a mind response

08:10 Our "modern" social engagement system in the brain and how this shows up in our modern world

11:37 What do we mean by transdiagnostic - cutting across multiple domains rather than single diagnostic criteria

12:19 Early psychiatrists working with soldiers from the World War 1 battlefields, began to consider that people were having a normal reaction to an abnormal event

13:30 The stigma of mental illness

16:19 My experience of release following Havening Techniques.

18:49 Why I think there's a lot of hope now as there are so many ways you can explore what works for you

Essay "Trauma Needs a Rebrand - Trauma, Psychedelics, Limitations of Our Existing Models, and Exciting Alternatives" by Liam Farquhar https://psychedelicpress.substack.com/p/trauma

Bessel van der Kolk - the Body Keeps the Score https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJfmfkDQb14

Peter Levine - Trauma is not an illness, but an injury or wound https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31z0veuNe9c

Polyvagal Theory explained. Somatic Consent Engagement System and Social Engagement System. Matthias Schwenteck https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=27FSiBqEDUs

S1.02 What is Trauma anyway, and how can we Move Beyond it? Introducing Trauma-Informed Coaching.

Thu, 23 Mar 2023 05:00:00 +0100

Welcome to episode 1 where we discuss what is Moving Beyond Trauma.

Here are some time stamps and details of what you'll get:

0:52 The nature of individual and collective trauma, and how coaching works WITH it but not ON it (this would be therapy).

2:12 The history of trauma, and why it is an embodied survival response that developed during evolution

3:00 The basic survival instincts (fight, flight and freeze) and how this messes with our Social Engagement System (the most modern part of the human brain)

3:45 Psychiatry, psychotherapy, and the (relatively recent) development of Polyvagal Theory

4:27 The Icky Thing about trauma exposure

5:40 Helping people understand enough about themselves to move or, make forward progress, and live a better life

6:26 The culture of ill-ness (or wrongness) in psychology and psychiatry

7:57 A quick view of the history of psychology through the lens of control of the masses (or just certain groups in society) and how this is still present is the Stigma we face in the West around Mental Health

9:23 How come there is such a cross over between Diversity, Equity, Inclusion and Justice (DEIJ) and trauma exposure

11:35 Better and better science and how we can move away from seeing natural trauma responses as "ill-ness"

12:03 Why what happened to you might be relevant to how come you are stuck now, and how to move on from that

13:40 I'm your expert companion, but watch out, Moving Beyond Trauma is an active process, you need to get busy!

16:02 Learning, unlearning, relearning yourself so you can help yourself and even others to move beyond trauma

17:32 The good news about that Icky Thing about trauma exposure

18:20 Why you'll never look back, and be glad you put the effort in to move beyond your trauma.

Links for this episode:

For more on the connection between individual and collective trauma with Thomas Huebl: https://youtu.be/sGzkGi1hYi0

For more on the Polyvagal Theory and our 3-part nervous system: https://ct.counseling.org/2016/06/polyvagal-theory-practice/#:~:text=Polyvagal%20theory%20helps%20us%20understand,lightheadedness%20of%20a%20bad%20flu.

S1.01 Introducing Moving Beyond Trauma Podcast: Season 1, what's coming up, why I do this, and why trauma is all around you whether you know it or not.

Thu, 23 Mar 2023 04:00:00 +0100

Welcome to Moving Beyond Trauma Season One!

In this short episode I share the idea behind this podcast and some of the great episodes I am preparing for you.

Here are some time stamps and notes on what you'll get:

0:26 The difference(s) between coaching and therapy

1:11 Why this work is needed in the world

2:30 My story and how I learnt to move beyond trauma

3:20 The Psychology of what is right with you

4:11 Coaching psychology approach compared to standard coaching

4:55 What kind of people work with me

5:13 Why this podcast is free from me to you

5:40 This season will run with weekly episodes until the summer break

What would you like me to cover? Message me in the comments!

Subscribe so you can get notified of new episodes when they drop, and let me know what you want to hear more of.

Thanks for listening!

Links for this episode:
- The World Health Organisation study by Benjet et al (2019)

The epidemiology of traumatic event exposure worldwide: results from the World Mental Health Survey Consortium | Request PDF

- Positive Pscyhology, the science of what is right with you:

What Is Positive Psychology & Why Is It Important?).