Raunchy Reading

No Justice for Gin! Duke of Midnight Part 3

Mon, 01 May 2023 07:00:00 -0700

Orgasms, Emeralds, and Angst- oh my~! Escape in the dead of bright morning to the final installment of Duke of Midnight, that's right daring doers, It's Part Three! As the hour nears 12 of the clock, capers, chases, and smut commence.

Will the Duke do the right thing? Can Craven control his sass? 'Tis time to identify the final Batman AU characters as we cum to the conclusion of Elizabeth Hoyt's excellent tale- a balance of Big Watson Energy, and Sad Dick Energy... pregnate with likely Typhoid.

If we can take but three humble lessons from this, take 1. Gin is great. 2. If you want dick, go get it. 3. The real friends are the dicks we found along the way.

Holy Pants-Feels, Batman! Duke of Midnight- Part 2

Mon, 17 Apr 2023 07:00:00 -0700

Part TWO of Elizabeth Hoyt's Duke of Midnight! Are you ready for some pants-feels? Join us for a wade through hip-deep-angst amidst the gin-soaked alleyways of Saint Giles, the /cough/ workout-dungeon, and dingey secret passageway- now charmingly decorated with a sexy, chained up man- you know, like all the classiest archeological sites.

It's Batman AU galore with a constant side of sass from our dearest Alfred-Fucking-Pennyworth... sorry- CRAVEN. You want to learn about the DCU? Too bad, it's happening anyway, and I promise you'll love it, even if you think you won't! Kind of like someone responding to a slap by making-out seems like bad form, but magically, believably isn't because #goodwriting !

Quick, collect your cluster of canonical Robins, and tune in This Bat-Time on This Bat-Chanel! To the Ghost-Mobile!

The Batman AU You Never Knew You Needed- Duke of Midnight Part 1

Mon, 03 Apr 2023 14:00:00 -0700

BPA-Free Boning; Kiss Quotient Part 2

Mon, 20 Mar 2023 23:00:00 -0700

Ruh-roh, dinner at your escort-fake-boyfriend's family's place? Social snafus? Way too much angst for one man about... not much? Wow, much wow.
Join us for the second and final part of our Kiss Quotient Review (by Helen Hoang). Listen, when you're Daniel Henney hot, ripped, thoughtful, loving, talented and into fashion, there has to be at least one downside- hint, it's too much angst for what wasn't really a big deal. But what is a big deal? Having a disastrous first meal with your boo's family and the heartbreak of falling in love when there is no reason not to!
We loved this book, and think you will too. Keep a weather eye for representation, realism, growth, and a great deal of steamy... sorry I misspelled that- STEAMY- sex scenes.
Stop microwaving foods in plastic. It's time to slice up some mangoes with ngoai, and settle in for a refreshing ride with realistic characters, realistic relationships (good, bad and ugly), and quite the HEA!

Sexponential Equations: The Kiss Quotient Part I

Mon, 06 Mar 2023 07:00:00 -0800

Hey STELLAAAA … for the season premiere of Raunchy Reaching, we read something we both … actually … liked? She’s a hot econometrician who owns a house in San Francisco (in this economy?) and he’s a #goodsmellingcomfymuscledragontattooman with daddy issues. She needs someone to teach her how to sex and he needs someone to pay his automobills in this reverse Pretty Woman story! But will their arrangement lead to … something MORE? And will we lose our minds along the way? The algorithm says yes! Remember, #hotfitguyshaveproblemstoo, and if #danielhenneycomesforyou in the night, your partner will probably forgive you. Grab some mint chocolate chip ice cream, perk up your nips, and settle in for the first episode of season 2!!

Season Two- We Choose You!

Mon, 09 Jan 2023 07:00:00 -0800

Wooo, welcome 2023! Raunchy Readers, are you ready for some smut?! When I say dick, you say folds! Dick!
...
... dick...?
Hello?

It's the beginning of the year, and you need time to recalibrate, I get it. In fact, we do too, this is a hiatus announcement. Emily and I (Morgan) need some time to build a backlog of books read, and recordings completed before the year barrels on in earnest.

Raunchy Reading Season TWO(!) will launch on Monday March 6th, 2023. New episodes every other Monday- same bat-time, same bat-channel. As always you can reach us on social, or shoot us an email:

Twitter: @raunchyreading
Instagram: @raunchyreading
Email: raunchyreading@gmail.com

For Christmas, Go Down... Under!

Mon, 26 Dec 2022 07:00:00 -0800

The Christmas Leap by Kiera Andrews, NOTABLY narrated by the, apparently, exceedingly talented Greg Boudreaux.

That's right, we went Holiday themed for our last episode of the year, The Christmas Leap is seeing us out of 2022! This feel good M/M HEA has friends to lovers, fake relationship drama, bi-boys, self-discovery, emotional maturity, a lot of 'only-one-bed' moments, some HOT sex scenes, and a trip Down Under (Australia... that means Australia...), and we've got a heart-of-gold Scotsman! Wait... Dolly Parton, is that you?

If at all possible, listen to the audio book so you can get the full glory of a Scottish Brogue and the Texan force of nature that is Angela Barker.

What you need to know: There are no lesser Hemsworths. Though it's not his fault, Kevin is unfit to live and riddled with Chlamydia, so it's a good thing he's an ornament. Kangaroos are jacked, Liam is famous for being gay, and one should always, ALWAYS fuck on heated floors when given the chance. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Safeword: Koala

Prom King MVP- Ancient History Part 2

Fri, 23 Dec 2022 20:00:00 -0800

It's part 2 of Ancient History by A.J. Truman!

Finally know what happens with our favorite reunited lovers, and watch the tension build for everyone's favorite whole-sexual and Drama Teacher! It's a will they, won't they where we all already know the answer, but we want it all anyway!

It's PROM SEASON kids, so hit up Mr. Formal, and try not to be crippled by anxiety and hormones (pick one, that's all you get). We've got Promposals, cute moments, some not so discrete moments, and a lot of maturity going around.

What you need to know: Fuck Tommy. P.R.O.M.? Hospitals will not let you do that. Raleigh means PANsexual. Pop has still got it, and remains, as always, #thebest .

Safeword: CUMberbund ... Do you get it? Do you get what I did there?

Varsity Blowjobs- Ancient History Part 1

Tue, 29 Nov 2022 02:00:00 -0800

This week come along as we delve into Ancient History by A.J. Truman, the first book in his South Rock High Series. This one had to be a two parter! Sure, you'll get a Charlie cameo (Barkeep and the Bro, episodes 14 & 15), but trust me, you really want to be here for Amos and Hutch! Strap in. High school drama, old and new, the old man you didn't know you needed in your life- Pop is #thebest-, and emotionally mature rekindled love, wrapped in lust! It's HEA on high with gorgeous Amos ('borrowed' zucchini famous), and Hutch, a jock cultivated by the 'horniest of Greek Gods'.

We've created an entire new field of study for higher education, we still can't get over shipping NFL coaches, LOTR lives rent free, camping is too early, and Shakespeare lives on... so yeah, we get off the rails a bit, but you expect that by now xoxo.

What you need to know: HS teacher group chats are the bee's-knees. Jesus would totally be a catch in the gay community. Candy does not a relationship make. Ophelia only got that Hamlet dick one time.

Safe Word: Water Sports

We'll see you in New Orleans for the conference!

Not So Baby Steps- Discovering Fanfiction

Thu, 10 Nov 2022 18:00:00 -0800

Lightning Bored- Monsters & Mayhem Book 1

Mon, 31 Oct 2022 22:00:00 -0700

Lightning Bored by Sam Burns is an M/M reimagining of Frankenstein. We wanted to cover a creepy book for Halloween, instead we got a flat tale that didn't inspire us at all. So what are two Raunchy Readers to do? Go off the rails. From Hans Christian Andersen to Count Silver Nose, this is an episode of flights of fancy, tales from the crypts of our mind, and fun facts.

Enjoy or fearsome tales. Sleep over truths from middle school (the most horrifying of times), Star Wars, LOTR, more plucky reporters, Supernatural, Zombies, Nightmares and Stoned Kids in Graveyards.

Warning: Suicide, and discussion of suicide ideation.

Late, Sick, but See you Soon

Mon, 24 Oct 2022 17:00:00 -0700

Back on Halloween, Monday October 31st with Lightning Born by Sam Burns- Book One of the Monsters and Mayhem series of MM Romantic retellings of classic horror literary works!

The Geek Squad Can't Fix My Boyfriend- Melting Iron

Mon, 03 Oct 2022 23:00:00 -0700

This episode's book is Melting Iron by Laurann Dohner, an M/F Cyborg, space romance brought to you by the local library, because... because. Are you looking for a sci-fi Stockholm syndr- sorry, ROMANCE, extra-light on the sci-fi with perfectly normal human 'cyborgs' minus all the pesky emotions?! Cool, lower your expectations a touch, and we are there! Don't worry, if your nebulously enormous, color-changing captor/boyfriend goes unresponsive- he's just updating his OS. FYI dick recalibration requires two-factor authentication- Seek a cyborg technician if updates last longer than 4 hours... or haul him over to Best Buy.

Emily read this, so we all wouldn't have to. Respect. This battle station was NOT operational.

Careful: Pet-humans will eat your body after you die, so beware of choking on lug-nuts alone in your berth. Tauntauns were harmed in the making of this episode, they'll see you in hell. The Godfather book made some surprising choices about genitalia. News flash- the V is elastic, just saying.
Coming soon: Pillows
Safeword: Garden (10/10 would tree)
Question: If a dog gets wet on a calculous test, does anyone really know?

Wedding Crashers- Barkeep and the Bro Part 2

Mon, 19 Sep 2022 21:00:00 -0700

Bro of the Golden Ratio; Barkeep and the Bro Part 1

Mon, 05 Sep 2022 21:00:00 -0700

Join us for AJ Truman's Barkeep and the Bro, an HEA (Happily Ever After) M/M romance novel featuring an age gap, self-discovery, a zucchini that *opens a lot of doors* and quite the Bear on Frat Bro action! Talks of college, finance, and the economy are worth it, we promise!
Are you looking for people just living their lives, and learning their way without all the /panic/? We were too, and this is where we found it.

Come with us, we're going on an adventuuureee Chaarrrlliieee- it's candy mountain, Charlie; name: Mitch.

Moral of the Story: When a bunk deal goes bad, bunk up with a Bear baby!

Safe word: Mai Thais

Triggers: Dirty fraternity house bathrooms, the realities of partying too hard (vomit), and truths about fending off creeps!

Ice Planet Barbarians; Shorshie Sa-Khuiding

Mon, 22 Aug 2022 23:00:00 -0700

Welcome to a magical world that is not Hoth, where alien dicks fit into human vaginas and alien consonants fit into human ears. It’s Ice Planet Barbarians, a book that we had a lot of thoughts and feelings about. We’ve got good blue bois, third nipples, linguistic rants, and a whole-ass tangent about the Oregon Trail! It’s a timeless tale of a space idiot who meets a lorge alien sex toy (who respects her), climbs him like a mountain, and ends up barefoot and pregnant on an ice planet. We’re full of rage, but you could also say this book ~resonated~ with us.

PS From Emily: English isn’t a Romance language—it’s a Germanic language that borrows heavily from Romance languages. But who among us hasn’t gotten so distracted by the logistics of alien babies that they forgot everything they learned in grad school?

Trigger warning for alien gang rape 😨 and just a lot of grossness and trauma in the first chapter.

#bluealiendick #georgiemountain #linguisticdeusexmachina #spacecheetos #youdiedofdysentary #cupcakeforyourbrain

Getting Railed, A Hero's Journey; Learn My Lesson Part 2

Mon, 08 Aug 2022 23:00:00 -0700

Greek Dickthology; Learn My Lesson Part 1

Mon, 25 Jul 2022 22:00:00 -0700

Time for a jaunt into the fraught world of Greek Dickthology (or do I mean mythology?) with Katee Robert's second Wicked Villains book Learn My Lesson. Our new favorite thruple! The mythology lessons are as real as the struggle of talking about the Greek Pantheon right on the heels of Roe v. Wade being overturned. We can all agree that no one wants a swan coming after you with its dick out. Luckily we have the best Hercules of them all popping off these pages to make it all better. It's flight or fuck for our sweet himbo at the Underworld with Megaera and Hades. Let's put the peg in pegging, and and dodge the golden showers of regression! Herc, you #sweetpotatopie, leave the apron on, because you are in for the ride of a lifetime!

Safeword: Cerberus
Spoilers: Neon Gods by Katee Robert
Tags: M/F/M, BDSM, Anal, Pegging, Caning, Collaring, Exhibition, Finding your people
Triggers: Fellatio as a powerless act, Mythology discussions (read: rape, dehumanizing, toxic relationships), Politics- when recorded they had just overturned Roe v. Wade in the US

Vampire Queen 3; Tokyo Drift

Mon, 11 Jul 2022 23:00:00 -0700

Thanks be unto Joey W. Hill for this literary marvel, because it truly failed at being #actualgarbage. 'Tis a poetic journey of cis-boy butt fuckery, unapologetic femdom, the most realistic unrealistic male romantic lead, and just so, so, so much more. There is no time to explain it all- you need to collect your pointiest pumps- it's time for our first vampiric dinner party! Be sure to mind the Vampires while you're #keeping up appearances.
Dig in as we fill out the track list on our debut album, Carnal Caravan, and ask burning questions, such as- Bro, do you even hose? But ew David, our Moira impressions need work, we own that.

Come! For the night is dark and full of terrors... that one would not want to miss!

M/F Romance
Safeword: Canapes
Warnings: Anal, Monster sex, orgies, orgasm on command, blood, forest sex, sweet baby vampires named Brian, a ripped shirtless renaissance vagabond playing with your dogs.

Mo' Vampires, Mo' Problems- Vampire Queen's Servant Part 2

Mon, 27 Jun 2022 07:00:00 -0700

This week, strap on your chunkiest heels and slip into your most embellished jeans, as we join Lyssa and Jacob at the mall! There are tragic backstories. There’s cum on a kitten crop top. There’s the sleaziest villain to ever sleaze. There are dissolute French cats that might also be Russian. Emily learns that we all, do, in fact float down here, and Morgan gets inspiration for a new centerpiece. We may have 99 problems, but this book isn’t one!

The soundtrack for this episode was provided by Camberous Cock, the hottest, most throbbing band that you’ve probably never heard of.

#psychicblowjob #competenceporn #thornybutthole #tablesettings #fountainsex #hottopic #vampirepheromones #whydomyhandsfeelviscous

Content warnings for sexual assault (referenced—we don’t read the passage on the show), vampire-related blood and gore

Just the Tip: The Vampire Queen's Servant Part I

Mon, 13 Jun 2022 07:00:00 -0700

This week on the podcast, we’ve got hose in different area codes! Join us for the vampire femdom extravaganza that is The Vampire Queen’s Servant, by Joey W. Hill. A jacked AF knightly Irishman meets a half-Japanese, half-fae vampire who invites him into her fairy portal (not a euphemism). Note to self: when choosing a manservant, make sure he has been in the circus, gets along with your dog, and can do manicures AND oral. Along the way, we learn things about ballet, hilarious lightning accidents, and perhaps… even… ourselves. Also, Tuxedo Mask is here! #renfairecircuit #sexycircusmanabs #getyourshittogetherlouis #throwingarose #nails #menintights #freakyvampiresex #ihighlightedthisforyou #deliniation #buttholetraipsing #sleazy80svillain

Content warnings: femdom, sounding, bdsm, vampire-appropriate blood and gore

Breaking News: Jafar Fucks Like a Champ- Part 2 of Desperate Measures

Mon, 30 May 2022 07:00:00 -0700

We are back for Part 2 of Desperate Measures, by Katee Robert! It's off the rails chaos- the ride is worth. it.
Disclaimer: Have you or a loved one have had negative side effects from Jafasmine? You may be entitled to compensation! Thanks #Ke$ha!
Here's what you need to know: Red is Jasmine's color. Raja is good boi. Entering stage left is Captain Cock with Schrodinger's dick-hand. Turns out Carpet is a bear named Seth, Smee is a service sub, and Jasmine needs to learn Python, because aesthetic. Remember to never under estimate Backend Developers or flexible lads. And! We have reached our next evolution as themed interior designers/inventors.
Seem like a lot? Don't be intimidated, just breathe deep and tell me about your tech stack, Daddy!
Seriously though, do you smell... man-flesh?
Episode Safeword: Stale Crackers

TRIGGERS: Daddy Kink, Sex Toys, Chintzy Fuck-Pads, M/F and M/F/F pairings, Exhibitionisms
MENTIONS: Bukake, But Plugs, Murder, Ron Jeremy

You Ain't Never Had a Dom Like Me- Desperate Measures Part 1

Mon, 16 May 2022 07:00:00 -0700

Are you ready to take some Desperate Measures? We are! Thank you Katee Robert for writing your Wicked Villains series, and giving the world a glimpse into an AU where Mob Princess Jasmine finally falls into the Daddy Dom arms of Jafar, and boobs are free from gravity's sway! RIP Gilbert Gottfried and Robin Williams, we hope you will feel honored by what we have done here. #justiceforiago #caveofwonders #Rajaismysafeword . You can keep your #sweatyfupacrackers . Watch out for the #disneyvillaincreepermove, grab your #lubelamp, and recognize the new canon of Aladdin's Big Himbo Energy. Join us and find out how SSSSSNAKE-LIKE YOU CAN BE!

We nominate Jennifer Coolidge to voice Jasmine.

TAGS: Daddy Dom, Brats, Baby Girl, Mentioned threesome, mentioned anal

DEFINITEIONS: AU= Alternate Universe, Himbo= Attractive male bimbo

Toxic Little Lion Man

Mon, 02 May 2022 07:00:00 -0700

Oof, it's Tempting the Beast by Lora Leigh. Umm, wow. In this M/F, we've got an experimental cat-man, but not how you'd expect. It's worse. We've got military experimentation, a woodland commune, a plucky reporter who never seems to do her job, and a GRIP of toxic masculinity, bad choices, and dubious consent. Hark! What Lion Man jacks it in yonder field? 'Tis LOTR references, Emo Boyfriends, Grammar, Frothing, Dick-barbs, and a much needed overview of Feminism. Thundercats Ho! Quick reminders: the condom does fit, never jump from ass to vag., and that's exactly where you don't use sandpaper... Grab your emotional support Faramir, and cheer for Emily, she read this so none of us would have to. #wehatesitmyprecious #YeastInfection #DickBarbsandCatNards #Alldrynow

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Rape (presented as not rape), Toxic Masculinity, Anal
MUSICAL REFERENCES: Mumford and Sons, Cats

Real Mob Husbands of NY: Married to the Mobster Part 2

Wed, 20 Apr 2022 07:00:00 -0700

The edging is over, welcome to Part 2 of Married to the Mobster: Real Mob Husbands of NY! A review of the true life novel by Leighton Greene. That's right, it's time for the honeymoon- turtles, intrigue and gooey ducks. We've got a clueless mobster, a sentimental tattoo, and a serious case of marrying up to a fashion and social-savvy babe. But wait, are those... bad choices, tacky mob wives, fresh drama, and telenovela plot twists? Why yes, yes they are. And you get to hear all about them. Now who's the luckiest little bitch in all of New York City? Let us walk you through the moral takeaways, and learn you some know how- hint, you should always ask, do the nips match the dick?

TAGS: Anal, Rimming, Drug Abuse, Mob violence, Comas, Free Babies, Emotionally Dense Husbands [#idiot sandwich], and Blow Jobs

DEFINITIONS: We are coining this!- PNC= Post-nut clarity!

Reality Turf War- Married to the Mobster

Sun, 17 Apr 2022 20:00:00 -0700

Hi Raunchy Readers, Part Two of Married to the Mobster needs to be delayed until Wednesday the 20th. This is us officially popping the podcast cherry of needing to delay an episode... and I can tell you it's not for us. We love you all, and I promise- Finch's nips are still pink and puffy, Luca is still protective and angsty, and Tino's just the best. We just have to edge you for two days about it.

After this delay we will be right back to our regularly scheduled programming of every other Monday with Tempting the Beast on Monday May 2nd!

Pop a Cannoli and check out Leighton Greene, our author while you wait!

Take the Dick, Leave the Cannoli: Married to the Mobster Part 1

Mon, 04 Apr 2022 07:00:00 -0700

Part 1 of Married to the Mobster by Leighton Greene a charismatic M/M Romance between an Angel and a Devil- I mean a Mobster and his Little Bird. We've got it all~! Nipples, tropes done well, plenty of romping and rolling, puffy nips, the need for BJ diagrams (seriously, email us), remedies for under-eye-circles, dark humor, not joking about the nips, and a very unapologetic mess of a man we couldn't love more. What's that? The druggie club-kid stitched up a Made Man and their worlds were never the same again?
We loved it so much, we couldn't fit it into one podcast! Part 2 coming at you April 18th.

DEFINITIONS: Stunad- Italian slang: stupid/crazy
TAGS: Drug abuse, alcohol abuse, wound care
REFERENCES: Curious blowjob angles, man-nips, parent death

Psycho- Oh No! A Harry Draco AU?

Mon, 21 Mar 2022 07:00:00 -0700

Psycho, by Onley James, is a sexy (?), gay romance novel about a genius astrophysics professor who moonlights as a vigilante serial killer... also he's a psychopath... it's a lot. But don't worry, there is more! In this /obviously/ reskinned Harry/Draco AU expect holistic family bonding, erotic feedback loops, gettin' sucked in the stacks, and the FBI. But wait, who's that sexy blond romantic interest? Why it's Criminal Psychology Professor Draco Mal- wait, no. Lucas! Lucas Blackwell, and he's got a special power of his own.
Did we say it's a lot?
Sorry Stephen Hawking, these Fireflies are busy shaking ass!

DEFINITIONS: OP= Over Powered

TAGS: Um... Sexy wound care? OP people.
REFERENCES: Anal, Rimming, Fingering, vanilla sex being labelled dangerous

Discovering Percious; Mating Calls, Stationary, and Vulcans

Mon, 07 Mar 2022 07:00:00 -0800

Does the title sound crazy? Good, that's accurate. We started recording intending to make the intro, and got distracted, like we do. Tangents galore, and questionable, but lovely, discoveries along the way. Orange Highlighters will never be the same. Join us on the journey, because boy howdy are we happy we had it!

TAGS: M/M, Poly, M/M/F
PASSING REFERNCES: M/F, F/F, Threesomes, Sub/Dom dynamics, Brats, Pegging, Anal, Kinks, Spanking, Edging
DEFINITIONS: OTP= One True Pairing, Consensual Non-Consent, OC= Original Character, Canon, Switch

Coming Soon: Check out our website for our Read-Along calendar, and Glossary of Terms.

The Intro Episode- Welcome to Raunchy Reading!

Sat, 05 Mar 2022 17:00:00 -0800

You know the drill, this is the trailer where we introduce ourselves and let you know what the podcast is all about!

TAGS:
This episode contains bad words, suggestive language, and passing references to Alien appendages. Enjoy~!

First full episode coming Monday, March 7th.

Visit our website to learn more about us, and check our Read Along Calendar so you're ready to laugh right along with us, spoiler free.