The Genworth/CareScout Cost of Care Survey shows average costs and serve as a helpful starting point. Other factors that influence cost include gender, location, and health status, among other factors.

Costs can come as a bit of a shock initially, but as Lisa cautions, “Do not to panic, keep listening, there can be a plan for everyone, no matter how much or how little money your parents might have.” 

We talked about the various housing and long-term care (LTC) options in the previous episode – The Cost of Senior & Long-Term Care Housing: Will It Break the Bank? -- reviewing the options of retirement and LTC communities. Independent living in our area (greater Seattle) is in the range of $5,000 to $7,000 a month. If you start to need assistance, such as assisted living, the care costs in our area can average $8,000 to $10,000 a month. For memory care, it’s more like $10,000 to $12,000. (And we’ll talk about Touring Tips in upcoming episodes).

Knowledge is power. Being prepared matters, especially since seven in ten people will need some form of long-term services and supports during their lifetime. It’s also important to plan for our own future needs.

A common scenario we see with our clients’ families and friends, as well as our own friends, is how hard they work to bend over backwards to honor their parents' wishes to keep them in their home, and the costs continue to mount, as does the stress, because the adult children are the ones that are responsible for managing all that. It can become tremendously chaotic and more difficult and challenging.

A long-term care community, by contrast, can help bring peace of mind by providing a safe, supportive residential environment, along with delicious meals, enriching social engagement activities and events, medication management, caregiver support as needed. 

As a family care partner, you are important too. It’s essential for you to find balance, stay healthy, and engage a guide as you are navigating the many facets of caring for your parents. As Lisa encourages “I think most importantly, you want to continue to be your parent's kid, and you want that relationship.”

Our expertise in this area provides you with in-depth knowledge to avoid pitfalls when choosing a senior housing community and tailor guidance to your family’s unique situation. As Aging Life Care Managers, we follow a code of ethics that ensures we are recommending housing options that are most suited for you, and without accepting commission or referral fees.

Our Aging Life Care Professionals (aka geriatric Care Managers) have the experience and knowledge to guide you on planning for today as well as the future.

Not quite sure what steps to take next? You can schedule a get-acquainted call with us to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

Additional Resources

• Financial worksheet (from Aging Wisdom)
• Cost of Long-Term Care Survey for cost comparison
• Cost of Long-Term Care (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
• Self-Care is Not Selfish: It’s Selfish for Family Caregiver Well-Being (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• How Do You Pay for Long-Term Care? (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
• When is It Time to Move? (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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Understanding what you will pay is essential. That is why we cover the breakdown of costs in this episode and get more specific in subsequent episodes.

We have included a financial worksheet--which you can download from here --to help keep track of information as you are making inquiries of different communities. 

As we covered in earlier episodes of our podcast, there is a wide variety of senior housing options including independent retirement communities, assisted living, memory care, skilled nursing/rehab, adult family homes, and Life Plan or Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRCs). They all have different costs, fees, and services. 

Before selecting a community and for a successful move, it is essential to understand:

• the level of care required (and any limitations)
• associated costs
• how costs will change or accelerate over time
• how that community will align with the social needs and preferences of the person in your care

Our expertise in this area provides you with in-depth knowledge to avoid pitfalls when choosing a senior housing community. And as Aging Life Care Managers, we follow a code of ethics that ensures we are recommending housing options that are most suited for you, and without accepting commission or referral fees.

Our Aging Life Care Professionals (aka geriatric Care Managers) have the experience and knowledge to guide you on planning for today as well as the future.

Not quite sure what steps to take next? You can schedule a get-acquainted call with us to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

Additional Resources 

• Financial worksheet (from Aging Wisdom)
• Cost of Long-Term Care Survey for cost comparison 
• Cost of Long-Term Care (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
• How Do You Pay for Long-Term Care? (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
• When is It Time to Move? (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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There are several different avenues you can go for guidance.

Most senior centers have a social worker on site that can be a great resource.

Your local Area Agency on Aging is another resource. Here in greater Seattle, you can start by contacting Community Living Connections as the portal through which you can access objective, confidential information about community resources and services options. 

You can also use the Eldercare Locator, a public service of the Administration for Community Living to connect you to services for older adults and their families. 

And then there are Aging Life Care Professionals like our Care Managers at Aging Wisdom. These professionals can help families navigate all these complicated choices and coach them along the way. A Care Manager is also adept at helping tailor choices depending on care needs, finances, how to make aging in place safe and supportive, or determining when a move is the best option.

Aging Life Care Managers help you not be alone during a stressful time and provide expert guidance and navigation, especially at those times of uncertainty.

Additional Resources

·      When to hire an Aging Life Care Manager

·      What is Ongoing Care Management?

·      Supporting Families in Times of Crisis

·      Dementia Caregiving is a Marathon, Not a Sprint

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The adult family home model has created a residence for individuals to get a high-level of care, but in a comfortable, home-like setting. AFH are especially wonderful for residents who would benefit from more one-on-one support and a calmer environment.

There are a lot of adult family homes in our area (greater Seattle-Bellevue). We like this model when someone needs a lot of care related to physical changes (such as prone to falls) and medical challenges and especially care for people who are in the more advanced stages of dementia. 

As Care Managers, we start talking to families about adult family homes if the person in their care has been in assisted living and makes the transition to memory care. It may be going well for a while, then something changes, and suddenly, it doesn't feel right. 

What we typically see is someone at a stage in their dementia where they're feeling overly stimulated by their environment. There's too much going on. They're having a harder time benefiting from the activities that are provided. There's a lot of coming and going and that's too much for them to process. They need a smaller, calmer environment. This is where adult family homes are so beneficial.

Sometimes people are experiencing behavioral or mood changes related to their dementia, and they need more focused one-on-one support. Staffing ratios are usually two caregivers to five or six residents. This way, residents can get more personalized attention. 

It's also a great option for people who have medically complex needs. For example, we've had clients move to adult family homes where maybe they were on a ventilator, or they had a feeding tube. Years ago, the only option for them would have been to live in a skilled nursing facility, which is a clinical, institutional atmosphere, rather than the more intimate, residential setting of an AFH.  

The number of adult family homes to choose from in our area can be overwhelming. Families often aren’t sure what to look for or how to assess which AFH will be the best fit for the person in their care. We help families navigate and narrow down the options and find the best fit for the person in their care. 

If you’re anticipating a move and not sure how to move forward, click here to schedule a free, get acquainted call with one of our Care Managers.

Additional Reading and Resources

• Adult Family Homes: Smaller, calmer residential environments (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
• Moving to Memory Care or an Adult Family Home  (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)

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Healthy, active adults move into a CCRC as an independent resident. If you need more support over time, there are various levels of care within that building or campus available to provide care. 

Care is provided as a continuum. Needing a higher level of care (Assisted Living or Memory Care) often requires moving to another apartment or floor. Some communities offer “flexible licensing,” meaning you can stay in your Independent Living apartment and add Assisted Living services when needed. For Assisted Living and Memory Care, ask to see a “Disclosure of Services” that clearly outlines what the facility does and does not provide.

CCRCs and LPCs offer many amenities and social engagement opportunities. These may include lectures, pool and sports/fitness areas, craft rooms and workshops, movie theatre, organized outings, and trips. You will also typically find a beauty shop, barber shop, and a spa. 

CCRCs require a buy-in or entry fee ranging from $300,000 to $1 million. Different contracts dictate what happens to that money if you leave the building or pass away. Monthly rent and any needed care charges are additional. Each CCRC offers different contracts. It's important to understand the type of contract, what is covered, and how costs increase as your needs change. We advise that an attorney and/or financial advisor review the contract with you, so you understand the terms of the buy-in fee. 

Most CCRCs and LPCs have wait lists. A nursing assessment is required and those with pre-existing care and/or cognitive needs may not be accepted. Couples should understand how costs will increase if they require different levels of care and occupy separate apartments.

Would you like a partner in planning?
Click Here to Schedule a Get-Acquainted Call with one of our Aging Life Care Experts.

Additional Reading

• What is a "life plan community" (aka "CCRC")? (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRCs) (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
• Navigating Long-Term Care Options (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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They differ from the other options we’ve discussed in that they are geared for two types of care: one is short-term rehab following a hospitalization.  This is where someone may receive physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, nursing care, and medical oversight. 

The other type of care is more specialized and geared towards residents who need 24/7 medical oversight. For example, significant care such as a two-person transfer, insulin-dependent diabetes, or skin issues requiring wound care, or more complex medical issues such as a feeding tube.

Additional Resources

• Skilled Nursing Facility Care Coverage – Medicare
• Washington DSHS Long-Term Care Residential Options
• Washington State Nursing Home Locator and Inspection Reports

Planning for long-term care and not sure where to start? We can help! Schedule a free get-acquainted call today to learn more about your situation and to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs. 

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A move to memory care may be prompted by a change in health or cognition that is unsafe or unhealthy for the person living with dementia or their primary care partner.  

Memory Care is specifically designed to provide a safe, secure, supportive living environment, be it a stand-alone community or a separate unit within assisted living or a CCRC or Life Plan community. Memory care communities provide 24/7 care for individuals living with memory or  other cognitive changes such as Alzheimer’s disease and other dementias.

Staff also assist with activities of daily living, medication management, and meals, just like in assisted living, but are specially trained to support individuals living with Alzheimer’s or another dementia. Staff provide regular routines, added structure, and extra assistance for those with middle stage to advanced dementia. Staff also offer social engagement and life enrichment activities.

While units or communities are often secure to protect residents, many offer enclosed exterior spaces for walking, access to greenspaces, gardening activities, fresh air, and sunshine. Others have circular interior walkways with supportive handrails, and windows offering comforting views of nature.

How do you choose the right community? 

Picking the best environment is important. It can also be daunting. And just like searching for home care and professional caregivers, an online search will provide hundreds of choices. How do you narrow down the options?

Aging Wisdom Care Management and Creative Engagement staff regularly visit clients who are residents in many different long-term care communities throughout King and Snohomish Counties. We have extensive knowledge of these communities, including assisted living, rehab and nursing home facilities, adult family homes, and specialized memory care services. We can also advise on costs and quality of care when evaluating options.

Our Care Managers also understand the more nuanced needs of a client’s well-being and enhance quality of life, and which communities would be the most supportive for your parent’s unique circumstances, goals, and personality.

This is about more than care. It’s about having an experienced partner beside you, navigating the journey with wisdom, compassion, and heart. Click here to Schedule a Get Acquainted Call today to explore how we can help.

Additional Reading

• When is It Time to Move? (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Steps for a Successful Move to Memory Care (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• What is Memory Care? When is It Appropriate? (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)

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• A move to Assisted Living for someone who has been struggling with navigating living in their single-family home or condo can be transformative. 
• Assisted Living support is intermittent, not one-on-one. Assisted Living provides specific support for Activities of Daily Living (ADLs) such as bathing, dressing, toileting, personal hygiene, transferring/moving, and eating., and Instrumental Activities of Daily Living (IADLs) such as medication management, meals, and housekeeping. 
• If health or condition changes, and a resident needs more assistance, consideration of a move to a higher level of care will likely be necessary to ensure safety.
• Comforting to know that trained, skilled staff provide support and oversight.

If you’re not sure where to start, and you live in the greater Seattle-Bellevue area, CLICK HERE to schedule a FREE get-acquainted call today!

Live outside the area? You can find an Aging Life Care Expert near you by visiting the Aging Life Care Association.

Additional Reading

• Signs an Older Person You Care About May Need Help (Aging Wisdom article)
• Supportive and insightful podcasts for family caregivers (Aging Wisdom article)
• When is It Time to Move? (Aging Wisdom article) 

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While “aging in place” has its benefits, such individualized care can be expensive. Additionally, it can be isolating. Senior housing and long-term care options require a move but are more social and can be cost effective.

• Assisted living. People move to assisted living when they are ready to stop cooking, cleaning, and maybe even driving. They enjoy social activities but need more help than an independent retirement community might offer. 

In this episode we explore a few of the advantages to moving to an assisted living community:

• Socialization and engagement opportunities; community.
• Flexibility of care: You can move in as an independent resident, with access to support when needed.
• Most AL communities are a month-to-month arrangement, which can provide flexibility too -- if it's not a good fit, moving to a different community can be done relatively risk-free.

Need a partner in planning? Click here to Schedule A Call to get the conversation started.

Additional Reading:

* A Move to a Retirement Community Could Mean More Independence (Aging Wisdom article) 

* Choosing a long-term care facility (Aging Wisdom article)

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People often move to assisted living when they are ready to stop cooking, cleaning, and maybe even driving. They enjoy social activities but need more help than an independent retirement community might offer. Though not a setting for people with advanced dementia, some assisted living residents may be experiencing cognitive change.

Assistance can range from no assistance to providing full care. Personal care is provided as needed for Activities of Daily Living (ADLs). Nurses are often available to assist. Costs will increase as care needs increase. 

Meals are usually included, as is transportation. Activities are often a highlight. Additional amenities may include a hair salon, barber, massage, swimming pool, and a fitness room. Some communities also have workshops, craft rooms, and libraries.

Additional Reading

• 3 Questions You Should Ask about Long-Term Care Planning (Aging Wisdom article)
• Choosing a Long-Term Care Facility (Aging Wisdom article)
• Navigating Long-Term Care Options (in greater Seattle) Part II (Aging Wisdom article)

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In this next series of episodes, we provide a comprehensive overview of the six most common options: Assisted Living, Memory Care, Skilled Nursing/Rehab, Continuing Care Retirement Communities, and Adult Family Homes, starting with Independent Living.

Why choose independent living?
Many people move to independent living to downsize from a now-too-large home, or to relocate to a quieter neighborhood and do less driving. Some people seek relief from decades of cooking and cleaning. Another big draw is having a built-in community and activities, from book clubs to seminars to fitness centers. 

Additional Resources

• Considering an independent living community (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• When is it Time to Move? (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• A Move to a Retirement Community Could Mean More Independence (Aging Wisdom blog article)

Let us help you understand the options and help you plan your move. Click here to Schedule a Get-Acquainted Call to get the conversation started.

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• First step: Get educate about care options.
• Second step: Understanding the cost of various options and your parents’ financial situation.
• Third step: What level of care do your parents need?
• Fourth step: Create a plan based on your parents’ preferences, their specific care needs, and their financial situation.

Who can help families navigate these sticky and complicated situations and create a plan?

• Most local senior centers have a social worker on-site who can be a resource
• Your parents’ doctor might also be able to assist you in making decisions about your parents’ care
• An Area Agency on Aging: https://www.n4a.org
• The Alzheimer’s Association is a great resource if dementia is a concern: www.alz.org 
• Or professionals like us at Aging Wisdom: https://agingwisdom.com
• You can find an Aging Life Care Expert in your area through the Aging Life Care Association: https://www.aginglifecare.org

How can an Aging Life Care Professional Help? 

• Provide education and resources
• Help you understand the care options and what they entail – Stay home? Moving? Cost?
• Provide a care assessment 
• Create a plan to move forward
• Help you make progress with your parents to help them buy in with the idea of accepting assistance
• Navigate family dynamics
• Scenario planning 
• Partner with you on the journey so you don’t feel alone. Help you make difficult decisions. 

You're not alone. To explore how Aging Wisdom can help you navigate the journey and plan for the future, click here to schedule a get-acquainted call. 

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We’ve look at the reasons your parents are resistant to change. 

We’ve talk about the common challenges to staying at home.

Now we are going to explore the benefits of what a retirement or senior living community has to offer. 

In future episodes we’ll cover next steps when planning for a move, as well as the specifics about different levels of care, which is appropriate when, and costs. 

Additional Reading and Resources

·      From Professional to Personal Experience: Moving my Mom (Aging Wisdom blog article)

·      When is it Time to Move? (Aging Wisdom blog article)

·      A Move to a Retirement Community Could Mean More Independence for Your Parent (Aging Wisdom blog article) 

·      Know Your Options: The Pros and Cons of Living at Home as You Age (Aging Wisdom blog article) 

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Just a few of the more common challenges we see to staying at home:

• Home maintenance and accessibility 
• Social isolation and loneliness
• Transportation 
• Fall risks, limited mobility, and physical safety
• Medication and health management
• Family exhaustion 
• Finances 

Understanding the landscape and planning for what’s to come can save a lot of stress and heartache in the long run.

Additional Reading and Resources

• When is It Time to Move? (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Signs It’s Time to Move (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
• Pros and cons of aging in place (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• The Dance: Finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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We know this content is valuable, but perhaps better shared now as short podcasts episodes.  

Over the next few months, we’ll be rolling out a new weekly episodes from this repurposed series. We hope you will find this helpful as you navigate the journey.

Season 4 Episode 1 “I will never move!”

We assume you are here because you have been worrying about your parents or another older adult in your care:

• You’ve likely had a few sleepless nights
• You are banging your head against the wall trying to open a dialogue with them about your concerns
• You feel overwhelmed because you are trying to juggle your work, your own responsibilities, AND assist them
• You have been suggesting help only to have them tell you they are just fine and do not need help
• You feel guilty because you think you should be doing more

If even one of these concerns is familiar, this series of podcast episodes from Should I Move Mom? is for you!.

We have repurposed the course Should I Move Mom? into four podcast episodes:

• “I will never move!” Some common reasons your older loved one might be digging in their heels
• Home Sweet Home? Being at home isn't all it’s cracked up to be
• Is the Grass Greener? Benefits retirement communities offer
• Now What? 4 steps to understanding options; risks and benefits of each

Over these four episodes, you will learn about options, resources, and master your understanding of how best to help an older loved one to stay safely at home or move to a retirement community.

It’s likely you are worried about an older adult in your life. You have probably wondered if they would be better off living in a retirement community. 

Have you made that suggestion? Only to be told “I will never move!” 

In “I will never move!” we address some of the common reasons older adults are resistant to moving and resistant to accepting help. It’s important to understand the situation from their perspective. 

Resources and Additional Reading:

• Can freedom and safety co-exist? (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Pick your battles (Aging Wisdom podcast episode) 
• Resistance to Care is a Common Challenge: What’s the best path forward? (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of Insight May Be the Reason (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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Their discussion in this episode focuses on working with an Aging Life Care manager, Sandwich caregiving, and long-distance caregiving.  

Should we proactively establish a relationship with an aging life care manager? 

If you're engaged in proactive planning, an Aging Life Care professional (aka Care Manager) can help. We help you with personalized planning, goals, thinking ahead, considering options, and anticipating needs and costs.

Like attorneys, we bill for our time by the hour. When people first begin working with Aging Life Care professionals, it tends to be four to seven hours of services to help you with that planning. Most care managers, once you've met with us and you have a relationship, you can then reach out as things change.  

It can often help ease some anxiety when you're thinking about the future, particularly those that are aging solo.  

How do you navigate caregiving when you work fulltime or live long-distance from your parents? Are there any websites or particular tools that one can utilize to help determine the best places to go for care, folks to reach out to, etc?   

Aging Life Care professionals (aka care managers) like us can help you navigate the best home care agencies or the best retirement communities. Engaging somebody like Aging Wisdom can be helpful because they'll connect you with those resources. And we have relationships with local resources, we know who is dependable and the approximate costs.  

And if your parents aren’t interested, you can still meet with a professional to help you understand the lay of the land.  

A senior center can be a great resource as well. For example, if someone's asking me for help in a different area of the country, and I see there isn't a care manager, I'll look to see if there’s a senior center. Senior centers are usually a great hub of knowledge and can help you navigate resources in their area.  

Want to learn more about how our client-centered approach to living, caring, and aging well can benefit you? Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers.

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Their discussion in this episode focuses on long-term care insurance and long-term care costs.  

Financial advisors often help clients review long-term care insurance plan options and can help guide them on what would work best for their individual situation.  

And as Aging Life Care professionals, we are often asked by our clients about the cost of long-term care. From home care to supportive living communities, there are many factors that are part of the answer. We keep up to date on costs and can provide clients with a dependable assessment of short- and long-term costs. We also help clients look at aging-in-place and determine when it might be best to move to a senior living community. 

Lisa also talks about the Village movement and how this can be a great resource for those living within the coverage area of a village network.  You can read more about this growing model of support in Neighbors Helping Neighbors: The Village Movement (Aging Wisdom blog article). 

Our Aging Life Care experts (aka Care Managers) provide one-time consultations or ongoing care management to help get clients moving in the right direction. We offer home visits, as well as consultations at two conveniently located offices in Seattle and Bellevue. We also offer virtual consultations. To schedule a get-acquainted call to learn more, click here.

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First question: Have you seen any data on what folks like the most as a type of care or how care types link to happiness or life satisfaction? 

As Lisa reflects, in general, it's really individualized because there's certainly people who say, "I'll never leave my house. I love my house. I want to stay in my house.” And you can stay in your house. It's possible to make that happen. 

But there are others for whom a retirement community might sound more appealing.  It's very much a personal decision. 

Figure out what makes you happy in life and how do you create a plan that ensures your values are being met. 

Next question: What is the biggest mistake you see families make?

As Lisa reflects: “Not planning.” Planning isn't always easy or fun. Most often people avoid doing their planning, or you'll say to yourself, “Oh yeah, I need to plan,” but it gets pushed back and you never do it.

Making plans, having conversations with your family or support people is important. But the legal documentsare really the most important. 

Resources to guide the process – variations on the theme of Proactive Planning

• 3 Questions You Should Ask About Long-Term Care Planning
• Wholistic Estate Planning
• The Power of Planning: Taking Charge of Your Own Aging Journey

Not quite sure what steps to take next? You can schedule a get-acquainted call with us to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

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Other professionals that can help you on the planning journey include:

• Your financial advisor or wealth manager 
• Local senior centers often have social workers who can be a great resource for helping navigate changes or letting you know what help is available
• The Alzheimer's Association -- https://www.alz.org
• Elder Law attorneys -- https://waela.org
• Primary care provider – yours or that of your parent/s 

Proactively planning for yourself or your parents is best addressed by pulling together your professional team to help you prepare, anticipate, and walk you through changes.  

You Are Not Alone! If you have these key supports engaged in planning, you will feel far less alone and better equipped to face what’s ahead.  

Not sure where to start? Aging Wisdom can help! As your trusted advisor, we can help you plan for and help you navigate the best options.  Schedule a free, get-acquainted call today to get the conversation started. 

Additional Reading and Resources

• Get in the Lifeboat: But Don’t Float Alone! Key Supports You’ll Want in Your Boat (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Preventing a Crisis (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• When is Care Management the Best Option? (Aging Wisdom podcast)
• What is “elder law”? (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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An Aging Life Care Professional provides consultation and comprehensive, personally tailored plans addressing health changes, family dynamics, housing, hands-on assistance, care planning, and more. We also assist in implementation and ongoing care management.  

<What is Aging Life Care?>

As Lisa shared in an earlier episode of this series, there are people like us all over the country. Aging Wisdom serves King and South Snohomish counties in Washington State. We are part of professional association – the Aging Life Care Association – and can help you find care management professionals in your area. 

As you're planning ahead, whether for yourself or your parents, it is essential to consider where you will live.

Do you want to remain in your home? Is that important for you? Is home really “Home Sweet Home?  There can be a lot of complications and unforeseen challenges to aging in place if we don’t plan.  

And many baby boomers come to see us because their parents had refused help, didn't plan, and they, as the adult children, were stuck picking up the pieces and cleaning up the crisis that occurred. 

When they come to us for consultation, their top priority is to proactively plan. “We don't want to be a burden to our children. We want to do this planning. We want to be prepared so that we're not a burden to our kids.” 

This could include a move to a retirement community. That decision comes with lots of possibilities and questions as well.  We help couples, individuals, and families navigate and narrow down the options.

<When is It Time to Move?>

Not quite sure what steps to take next? You can schedule a get-acquainted call with us to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

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The cost of long-term care often comes as a shock to many. 

What does care cost? This slide provides a snapshot of the annual costs of home care, assisted living, skilled nursing, and adult family homes. (Memory care costs are not reflected in this graph). This data comes from the Genworth Cost of Care Survey.  

As Lisa reflects, she has been doing this work for 20 years, and it's really over the last couple of years, certainly during the pandemic, that costs began to skyrocket in the greater Seattle area.

Good to note that no matter where you are in the country, costs in a major metro area will be more than outside the city. In the Seattle-Bellevue-Kirkland area, you don't have to go very far outside the metro area for costs to go down considerably. 

The need for long-term supports and services usually grows over time. Someone may need a little bit of help and over time, depending on health and condition, it may gradually transition to needing round the clock support. When people first start to need help, it's often an affordable expense to have a little bit of help at home. And there may come a time when moving to a more supportive living environment makes sense.

How Much Help Will You Need? At some point, 70% of us will need help at some point in time, but how long will you need help? Statistics show that someone over 65 will need some type of long-term care assistance for three years.  

Women tend to live a little longer, and that number is 3.7 years. For men it is a little less at 2.2 years. And 20% of us will need care for longer than five years.  

So the question people will often ask is, What should I be planning for? What number should I use when I'm planning for care? How many years should I be using in my financial planning? It never hurts to be more conservative in your planning. So, if you have the resources to plan for five years, it's certainly much safer. 

Uncertain about the cost of long-term care? Not sure what you want and how to engage your family? We can help! Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with a Certified Care Manager to head in the right direction. 

Additional Resources

·      What is Long-Term Care?

·      Paying for care at home

·      Wholistic Estate Planning

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Once you understand your assets or your parents' assets, the next piece is how much will it cost? Educating yourself on what options are available down the road if you or someone you care about needs help, and what will that cost (that’s what we’ll cover next week)? Because without that understanding, it's hard for you to plan. Examples include in-home care, community and assisted living, skilled nursing or nursing home care.

We refer our clients to the Genworth Cost of Care Survey to get a baseline of costs. You can access the Survey here. 

Who pays for long-term care expenses? Most people think that Medicare will cover assistance, caregivers, and retirement communities. And I'm the bearer of bad news, but I'm here to let you know that Medicare does not cover the expenses that I'll be talking about. I think the easiest way to try to remember is to think of because Medicare is really a health insurance. Medicare really mimics and follows that. It pays for your healthcare needs only. It doesn't pay for your long-term care needs. There are a few exceptions for that (we cover that later). But in general, the care that you may need someday is a private pay, out of pocket expense. 

One exception to that is if you have long-term care insurance. Long-term care insurance pays for the care referenced earlier, and that we'll review about next week. Another homework assignment: if you have long-term care insurance, review your policy with your financial advisor to remind yourself what is covered by your policy. It usually has a daily amount and then that daily amount kind of equals a monthly amount and then you've usually selected several years of coverage. 

If you're helping your parents, you'll also want to find out if they have long term care insurance and what does that policy look like? Just having that knowledge will bring a lot of peace of mind if and when you need assistance.

Time to begin planning and better understanding the options? We have the knowledge and expertise to help guide your journey. Click here to schedule a free, get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers.

Additional Reading

• Paying for care at home 
• 3 Questions You Should Ask About Long-Term Care Planning 
• Navigating Long-Term Care Options (in greater Seattle Area) Part I 
• Navigating Long-Term Care Options (in greater Seattle Area) Part 2 

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Advance directive is a broad term use to describe any legal documentation that spells out your future medical care if you are incapacitated or unable to communicate, as in the scenarios referenced above. 

This would answer questions such as how much treatment do you want at the end of life? Do you want life support? Do you want a ventilator? Do you want a feeding tube?

Your medical power of attorney (POA) would be part of your advance directive, the person who will make decisions on your behalf, according to your wishes. Your living will guide your medical POA on your wishes.

A Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) order may be part of your advance directive as well. If you're someone that doesn't want full treatment, it's important to do have a DNR order because the default in the hospital and the default for medics that come to your home is always full treatment.  

Have open conversations about these wishes. If you do have children and a spouse or a partner, making sure they understand your desire. If you're assisting your parents, these documents are really important. 

And when adult children reach out to assist with their parents and maybe they're frustrated that their parents are refusing help or their parents need more immediate care, it's often frustrating to them that we're asking about these documents as kind of the very first thing upfront because they feel unimportant when you're managing kind of crises at the moment. But these documents are what allow adult children to step in on behalf of their parents to engage services to get them help. 

So that's why these documents are really the first step in planning and preparing for yourself for your parents. 

Not sure what your next steps should be? We’ve helped hundreds of families navigate these conversations. Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers.

Additional resources:

• Advance Care Planning: Advance Directives for Health Care (National Institute on Aging)
• Estate Planning Guide and Checklist for 2024 (National Council on Aging)

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Most people are most familiar with the will, but when we're talking about long-term care planning, the most important documents are the powers of attorney documents.  

A comprehensive estate plan typically includes these essential documents: 

• financial power of attorney
• health care power of attorney
• advance care directive
• a living trust
• last will and testament

If you have done these documents already, but haven't looked at them in a few years, it’s a good idea to review and possible update them. As Lisa shares: “I'm giving you a homework assignment of finding the papers, remembering where you put them, maybe dusting them off, and then being able to answer these questions that I'm going to ask you now.”  

If you're helping your parents, you'll want to ask them:

• Have they done their legal paperwork? 
• Who did they name (or who did you name) as your powers of attorney (POA)? 
• Who did you name as the backup persons?
• Are the documents written to be effective immediately? Or are they written to become effective upon incapacity, and what triggers that?
• Do the people who are assigned as POAs know they are the POAs? Do they know where the documents are? Are they willing to serve in that role? Do they have the capacity to serve in that role? Do they have an interest? 

If you're a solo ager: it's even more important to to do this planning and think about who would fill these roles for you -- who will navigate your health and finances if you don’t have a partner or adult children?

Looking for an attorney specializing in elder law or estate planning? Uncertain about the cost of long-term care? Not sure what you want and how to engage your family? We can help! Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with a Certified Care Manager to head in the right direction.

Additional Resources

·      Estate Planning Guide and Checklist for 2024 (National Council on Aging)

·      Wholistic Estate Planning (Aging Wisdom blog article)

·      What is “elder law”? (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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Lisa Mayfield, our principal and founder, was invited by Kristin McHugh, Lead Advisor with Brighton Jones, to a conversation about proactive planning for the essentials of eldercare. 

We’ve created a series of eleven episodes, this being the first, from this informative conversation. The next 11 weeks will provide a comprehensive review of the steps, supports, and services everyone needs to prepare for their own aging, that of their partner or spouse, or planning for your parents or others you care about. 

Will you need help? According to the U.S. Administration on Aging, recent research shows that “most Americans turning age 65 will need long-term care services at some point in their lives.”1 

The first step is to kind of build a team of support around you. Pull in professionals who can help you anticipate, plan for, and navigate changes.  

Engaging knowledgeable professionals who can offer guidance and expertise, including: 

• An elder law or estate planning attorney ensures that key legal documents such as powers of attorney for finances and health care decisions and advanced directives are up to date. This gives others you trust, whom you’ve chosen, to legally to manage finances and medical decisions if you become incapacitated. 
• A financial advisor analyzes assets, projects future costs, assesses insurance options such as long-term care policies, and develops a financial plan to fund anticipated care needs. Learn how to select the right financial advisor for your needs.
• An aging life care professional (aka geriatric care manager). We provide consultation and comprehensive, personally tailored plans addressing health changes, family dynamics, housing, hands-on assistance, and more. We also assist in implementation and ongoing care management.  As Lisa shared, there are people like us all over the country. Aging Wisdom serves King and South Snohomish counties in Washington State. We are part of professional association – the Aging Life Care Association – and can help you find care management professionals.

Being proactive now leads to greater peace of mind and better outcomes. Preparation emerges as the key to embracing the evolving chapters of life while maintaining a sense of control and independence.  

1.    Who Needs Care? https://acl.gov/ltc/basic-needs/who-needs-care 

Additional Resources:

• What is Long Term Care? (Aging Wisdom fact sheet)
• The Power of Planning: Taking Charge of Your Own Aging Journey (article written by Lisa Mayfield for 3rd Act magazine
• Plan Your Lifespan (a website that helps you plan for health events such as hospitalizations, falls, and memory loss that may happen as people get older). 

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An Aging Life Care professional (aka Care Manager) is an experienced, knowledgeable, and objective person who can:

• help ease those tensions
• provide space for everyone to voice concerns
• then educate, guide, and mentor the family in support of the best options for the person in their mutual care.

At an impasse with your siblings or other relatives? Schedule a get-acquainted call to explore ways we can support and guide you on this journey. 

Additional Resources:

•  Surviving and Soothing Sibling Strife When Caring for Aging Parents (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Clash of the Siblings: How to navigate family dynamics when your parent needs help (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Dementia and Family Dynamics (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)
•  Helping feuding families achieve harmony around what’s best for mom and dad (Aging Wisdom podcast episode)

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In this week’s podcast, Sheila and Keri take a deeper look at the holistic range of services and supports that can be provided and coordinated by Aging Life Care professionals like our Care Managers.

Our Care Managers can remain actively involved to optimize care and adjust to changing needs and circumstances. When clients are facing the transitions of aging, we facilitate and guide strategic planning, provide coaching, and implementation of solutions.

We can remain actively involved to optimize care and adjust to changing needs and circumstances through

• care coordination
• effective advocacy
• responsive problem solving
• clear, collaborative communication
• personalized solutions

Whether a client needs support with a hospital or rehab discharge, planning for aging in place, selecting and making a move to a retirement community, assistance navigating the healthcare system, finding home health support, guidance in managing health conditions, to name several of the more common situations our Care Managers help clients navigate in support of well-being and quality of life.

Our team of Aging Life Care Experts brings unparalleled knowledge and experience. Our role is often described as coach, educator, stress reducer, navigator, and even life saver. We take a holistic, client-centered approach to guiding individuals, couples, and families navigating options for living well, caring well, and aging well.

Below are a few of our specialty areas:

• Alzheimer's & Dementia Care Management
• Elderly Parents Refusing Help
• Moving Your Elderly Parent to a Retirement Community
• Hospital Discharge Planning
• Parkinson's Disease Care Management
• Proactive Planning
• Solo Aging and Aging Alone
• Long-Distance Caregiving
• Stroke Care Management

Are you at a crossroads and not sure how best to move forward with key decisions? Did you recently receive a diagnosis that requires future planning? We can help! Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers for some clarity and peace of mind.

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Unfortunately, if you don’t have a plan to eventually retire the keys, and your driving becomes a safety issue, others will make the decision for you.

This is a common dilemma for families and friends, and an issue that prompts an inquiry call and consultation.  

In this third episode of What happens when you contact Aging Wisdom? Sheila and Keri talk about what happens before, during, and after a consultation that is primarily focused on driving and implementing effective changes with those in your care who shouldn’t be driving anymore. 

Additional Reading

• Retiring the Car Keys (an Aging Wisdom fact sheet)
•  My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of Insight May Be the Reason(an Aging Wisdom blog article)  
• Resistance to Care is a Common Challenge: What’s the Best Path Forward? (an Aging Wisdom blog article)

Putting the brakes on driving is a real challenge, but with Aging Wisdom’s help, the transition can be much smoother. Click here to Schedule a Get-acquainted Call with one of our Certified Care Managers.

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In this second podcast episode of What happens when you contact Aging Wisdom?, Sheila and Keri talk about what happens after the get-acquainted (inquiry) call  when the caller wants to take the next step.

Following the get-acquainted (inquiry) call, the next step is to schedule a consultation. During the initial consultation, you meet with an experienced and knowledgeable Certified Care Manager. We learn about your situation, listen to your concerns, and explore how we can help.

The situation may call for an assessment. An assessment is a person-centered review of a client’s health care needs, functional and accessibility needs, strengths and supports, goals, and other characteristics that will inform the care plan.

Consolation provides an opportunity to set priorities, review options, make informed decisions, and implement creative solutions. After the consultation, we follow up with a written report that is tailored and prioritized to the client’s needs.

Want to explore how a consultation can guide you to the best options for your situation? Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call to explore the possibilities.

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A Get Acquainted Call is usually the first contact. This call is an opportunity to learn about your situation and determine if our services fit your needs. 

“That first inquiry call is a time of discovery. They're telling us a little bit about what's going on. We're listening and then we're offering in general terms how we can provide assistance,” shares Sheila McKannay, New Client Services, Certified Care Manager. 

Individuals, couples, families, and friends come to us with a variety of concerns and questions. Our get-acquainted call won’t answer all questions, but it does provide a sense of how our Aging Life Care professionals can provide guidance and support.

Common situations that prompt an inquiry call include but aren’t limited to:

• An adult child calling about consistent uncharacteristic changes they’re observing in a parent that’s causing them concern such as personal hygiene, home maintenance, and managing finances or medications.
• Recognizing they need help managing caregiving responsibilities for a spouse or partner as dementia or another health condition progresses. 
• Questions about moving and what makes sense when. 
• A recent diagnosis of Parkinson’s, MCI, Alzheimer’s or another dementia, or recovery from a stroke. 
• They’re referred by their primary care physician, neurologist, elder law attorney, or financial advisor.
• Challenges when someone they care about is still driving and it’s no longer safe to do so.
• Siblings in disagreement about what is best for mom and/or dad and could benefit from the objective, informed guidance of an Aging Life Care Manager.
• A solo ager is having difficulty navigating the day-to-day and friends call to inquire about how to best help their friend. 

Next week, Sheila and Keri will talk about next steps, assessments, and consultations. 

Additional Resources:

• Seven Signs Your Parent May Need Help  
• Retiring the Car Keys
• Solo Aging: Eyes wide open
• Clash of the siblings! 

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• Northwest Driver Rehab
• EvergreenHealth Driving Skills Assessment
• Retiring the Car Keys     
• My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of Insight May Be the Reason  
• Resistance to Care is a Common Challenge: What’s the Best Path Forward?

Interested in exploring how best to navigate health and cognitive changes of an older adult in your care?  Schedule a free, get-acquainted call here to talk with one of our care managers to get the conversation started.

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Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

• Aging Wisdom (serving King and south Snohomish Counties)
• Sound Generations (King County)
• Homage Senior Services (Snohomish County)
• The Memory Hub (Seattle's First Hill)
• Providence ElderPlace (Everett, Kent, Redmond, Seattle, West Seattle)
• Elderwise (Seattle's First Hill)

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In this episode, Wendy Nathan, Certified Care Manager at Aging Wisdom, and Sandra Cook, Executive Consultant for GenCare Lifestyle, discuss some strategies to approaching a loved one who is needing help but may not be ready or doesn’t recognize the need. 

As Wendy acknowledged, it important to preserve the relationship. Diving in with “you need to move!” isn’t a good approach. One of the methods our care managers coach families to use is to have a conversation about the future. 

For example. "Mom, in the future when you might need help, what might be some of the things that you would want? Would you be interested in moving? Would you be interested in having care at home?" 

And talking about it in the future doesn't put the pressure on them to have to make any decisions right now. 

Listen as Wendy and Sandra share additional strategies and concerns.

Additional Reading and Resources

• The Dance: Finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent
• Resistance to Care is a Common Challenge: What's the Best Path Forward?
• A Move to a Retirement Community Count Mean More Independence for Your Parent
• What is Aging Life Care?

Not sure what to do next? Is the person in your care resistant to help? We are experts in guiding families on options and next steps. You can CLICK HERE to schedule a free get-acquainted call with one of our care managers.  Learn more about our Senior Care Services.

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• Discuss the value of independence in our society 
• Help us understand why older people may resist care/help 
• Offer techniques to help build and gain trust and cooperation 
• Provide creative ways to support to those who are reluctant to accept our assistance

Not sure what to do next? Are changes in an older loved one a source of worry for you? We are experts in guiding families on options and next steps. You can CLICK HERE to schedule a free get-acquainted call with one of our care managers.

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• Clash of the Siblings: How to navigate family dynamics when your parents need help 
• My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of insight may be the reason 
• Surviving and Soothing Sibling Strife When Caring for Aging Parents 
• Get in the Lifeboat: But Don't Float Alone! Key Supports You'll Want in Your Boat

Not sure how to begin? Put our expertise to work for you! Schedule a free, get-acquainted call today with one of our Aging Life Care experts.

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One of our favorite tools for getting a baseline on long-term care costs is the Genworth Cost of Care Survey.  Enter your city, state, or zip code for the median cost of care for a variety of care settings (including your home) in your location.

We stress median costs, as our experience as geriatric Care Managers is that LTC costs more than the median reflected in the survey. But again, it's a great place to start to get a realistic picture of costs, options, and levels of care.

Skilled Nursing: As Nicole shares in the podcast, if you're privately paying for a skilled nursing facility, you could easily be paying $13,000 - $15,000 a month. It's expensive and a very clinical atmosphere.  Skilled nursing, as discussed last week, is for those individuals who are rehabilitating following a hospitalization or needing 24/7 medical care. There are also residents that are who are utilizing Medicaid funding,  with Medicaid covering the cost of their care. Skilled Nursing podcast.

Adult Family Homes (AFHs): AFHs in our area typically range from $7,500 to $10,000 a month. Occasionally, we see it go a little higher for someone who has a pretty substantial care needs. We've seen it go as high as $12,000.  That's a little bit of an outlier. One of the things about adult family home costs is that they tend to be a little bit more contained over time. Adult Family Homes podcast.

Side note: There's more of a cost ceiling with adult family homes. And there are opportunities in some adult family homes for people to spend down to Medicaid.  

Assisted Living: With Assisted Living there are different levels and points, and so costs can vary widely as a result. We may know what it'd cost today, but it's difficult to predict (though we encourage you to ask questions to be prepared for what care may cost in six months or two years.  Assisted Living podcast 1.  Assisted Living podcast 2. 

Memory Care: Memory care cost are more closely aligned with assisted living.  Total monthly cost we see usually range from $7,000 to $12,000 a month depending on the community and the care needs. Memory Care podcast.

* The costs of care that Nicole discusses in this podcast are what we see in the greater Seattle-Bellevue, Washington state area. 

• You may find this free online course of help. Should I Move Mom? 
• Choosing the Right Long-Term Care Facility (an article from AARP)

Interested in exploring and planning for long-term care housing and not sure where to start? We can help! Schedule a free get-acquainted call today. 

This podcast is part of a longer conversation between Nicole Amico Kane, Director of Care Management at Aging Wisdom, and Brenda Dodd, Director of Training and Special Projects at Áegis Living. 

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

Looking for help? Schedule a free get-acquainted call with one of our Aging Life Care Experts today.

Additional Reading

• The Dance: Finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent
• What is Aging Life Care?

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

Skilled Nursing Facilities (SNFs), also known as Nursing Homes, are for individuals that have ongoing physical or mental conditions that require constant care and supervision or need rehabilitation following a hospitalization. 

Skilled nursing services focus on medical care. 

These services typically include nursing care, 24-hour supervision, three meals a day, and assistance with everyday activities. They provide physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, and medical oversight. 

The goal of rehab is to get patients back to their baseline and stabilize them so they can move on to the next step. Rehab is typically a Medicare-covered stay, following a hospitalization.

Many who live in a skilled nursing facility long-term are either relying on Medicaid funding or paying privately at $500+ per day. 

Additional Resources

• Skilled Nursing Facility Care Coverage - Medicare
• Washington DSHS Long-Term Care Residential Options
• Washington State Nursing Home Locator and Inspection Reports

Planning for long-term care and not sure where to start? We can help! Schedule a free get-acquainted call today to learn more about your situation and to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs. 

This podcast is part of a longer conversation between Nicole Amico Kane, Director of Care Management at Aging Wisdom, and Brenda Dodd, Director of Training and Special Projects at Áegis Living. 

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

Adult Family Homes are residential homes licensed to care for up to six non-related residents. They provide room, board, laundry, necessary supervision, and necessary help with activities of daily living, personal care, and social services. 

The adult family home model has created a space for people to get a high-level of care, but in a comfortable home-like setting. AFH are especially wonderful for residents who would benefit from more one-on-one support and a calmer environment.

There are a lot of adult family homes in our area (greater Seattle-Bellevue). We like this model when someone needs a lot of care related to physical changes (such as prone to falls) and medical challenges and especially care for people who are in the more advanced stages of dementia. 

As Care Managers, we start talking to families about adult family homes if the person in their care has been in assisted living and makes the transition to memory care. It may be going well for a while, then something changes, and all of a sudden it doesn't feel right. 

What we typically see is someone at a stage in their dementia where they're feeling overly stimulated by their environment. There's too much going on. They're having a harder time benefiting from the activities that are provided. There's a lot of coming and going and that's too much for them to process. They need a smaller, calmer environment. This is where adult family homes are so beneficial.

Sometimes people are experiencing behavioral or mood changes related to their dementia, and they need more focused one-on-one support. Staffing ratios are usually two caregivers to five or six residents. This way, residents can get more personalized attention.

It's also a great option for people who have medically complex needs. For example, we've had clients move to adult family homes where maybe they were on a ventilator or they had a feeding tube. Years ago, the only option for them would have been to live in a skilled nursing facility, which is a clinical, institutional atmosphere, rather than the more intimate, residential setting of an AFH. 

The number of adult family homes to choose from in our area can be overwhelming. Families often aren’t sure what to look for or how to assess which AFH will be the best fit for the person in their care. We help families navigate and narrow down the options and find the best fit for their loved one. 

 If you’re anticipating a move and not sure how to move forward, click here to schedule a free, get acquainted call with one of our Care Managers.

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Staff provide support with activities of daily living, medication management, and meals, just like in assisted living, but are specially trained to support individuals living with Alzheimer’s or another dementia. Staff provide added structure and extra assistance as residents as experience cognitive change. Staff also offer social engagement and life enrichment activities. 

While units or communities are often secure to protect residents, many offer enclosed exterior spaces for walking, access to greenspaces, gardening activities, fresh air, and sunshine. Others have circular interior walkways with supportive handrails, and windows offering comforting views of nature. 

When touring communities, things to look for:

• Are staff genuinely engaging with residents? Do they know residents on a personal level?
• Is the setting welcoming and friendly? Is it clean and safe? 
• What life enrichment activities are offered? Would they appeal to the person in your care?
• Do the residents seem happy, comfortable?

Is the person in your care appropriate for memory care?

It’s not uncommon for individuals diagnosed with a dementia such as Alzheimer’s to live on their own when they are in the early stages of the disease. This is especially true if there is someone such as a spouse, other family member, friend, or paid caregiver providing ongoing oversight and support.

There may come a time when the person in your care will require more support than you are able to provide. Alzheimer’s and many related dementias are progressive, meaning that changes to the brain are progressive, ongoing. Judgement, reasoning, mobility, executive functioning, memory, balance, and circadian rhythms are all affected. This can make caring for someone increasingly challenging and especially challenging for family caregivers.

These questions will help you assess the situation and determine if a move is appropriate:

• Is the person in your care unsafe in their home? This article may be helpful in assessing home safety: Know Your Options: The Pros and Cons of Living at Home as You Age
• Is your health or that of the primary caregiver at risk? Caregiving is stressful. Oftentimes, family caregivers don’t invest in self-care and this puts their health in jeopardy. You are a priority too.  Read Self-Care is Not Selfish: It’s Essential for Family Caregiver Well-Being
• Are you burnt out, stressed, and growing impatient? Take the Caregiver Burnout Quiz
• Are the needs of the person in your care beyond your physical abilities?
• Would the person in your care benefit from an environment that would provide social and creative engagement, structure, and support?

Looking for guidance on how best to move forward? Our Care Managers are experts in helping navigate important decisions about long-term care. 

Click here to schedule a FREE get-acquainted call today.

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Some assisted living communities require a one-time community fee and that could be quite the range.

A community fee for month-to-month assisted living is different than a buy-in fee or an entrance fee with a CCRC. This is a one-time fee. We typically see these as low as $3,000 and in some of the newer, higher-end buildings as high as $40,000 to $50,000. 

In terms of the monthly fixed costs, it depends on the community you choose and the type of apartment you select. Make sure you ask what, specifically, is included. In most communities, food and beverage, housekeeping, Wi-Fi, laundry, some transportation, and activities are included. 

In the Seattle area, we see apartment as low as $2 - $3,000 a month, and as high as $9,000  for a newer, high-end community for a two-bedroom apartment with a view.

In terms of care costs, someone needing a basic level of support such as medication management, costs are around $500 monthly. If the resident is prescribed a lot of medicine, it can be $1,000.

An important question our care managers coach families to ask is: “Tell me about the resident that's getting the highest level of care that you can provide and what does that person pay for their care?” The answer can help family plan for the highest levels of care if and when needed.

We like families to understand the high as well as the low range of fixed costs and care cost in planning. As we age, care needs often change, and it's helpful to anticipate the factors that impact assisted living costs because the price structure is dependent on the level of care that a resident requires.

The community care assessment helps with determining initial care needs. It's important for families to sit down with a representative at that community to understand what supports are needed and the associated cost for care. Now is also a good time to plan ahead. Plan for how mom is going to age and how the community can or cannot support her. 

Be prepared to ask questions, if relevant to your situation now or in the future, such as:

·       Can you provide a two-person assist or transfer? 

·       Can you do a Hoyer lift, or the Sara lift for a non-weight bearing resident? 

·       Can you provide sliding scale insulin? 

·       Talk to me about open wounds and wound care. What does that look like? 

·       What does their license permit them to provide?

Resources:

• To get a baseline on the costs of long-term care, including assisted living, check the Genworth Cost of Care Survey: https://www.genworth.com/aging-and-you/finances/cost-of-care.html
• How Much Does Assisted Living Cost? Prices by state and ways to pay (from Caring.com) https://www.caring.com/senior-living/assisted-living/how-to-pay/  

Interested in exploring and planning for long-term care housing and not sure where to start? We can help! Schedule a free get-acquainted call today to learn more about your situation and to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs. 

This podcast is part of a longer conversation between Nicole Amico Kane, Director of Care Management at Aging Wisdom, and Brenda Dodd, Director of Training and Special Projects at Áegis Living. 

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

ASK QUESTIONS SPECIFIC TO YOUR SITUATION. As Nicole points out, there's lots of variability from one assisted living to the next in terms of the care they can and cannot provide. It's really important to ask very specific questions that apply to your family's situation.

In Washington state it is a requirement that every facility provide a Disclosure of Services  that clearly outlines what that facility does and does not provide. Sometimes it's a starting point and actually helps you know where to ask more questions.

SOME EXAMPLES OF CARE NEEDS NOT COVERED. Some of the limiting factors at communities that provide lighter Assisted Living support that Nicole has seen specific to care needs includes:

• Transfers, also called functional mobility: how much help someone needs getting from bed to chair or standing.
• Incontinence care.
• Physical help with feeding or accommodating a modified diet.
• Challenging behaviors related to dementia. 

As you review potential communities, those are the key areas that we focus on. And ask yourself, Is this a community that can support those needs now? And what does that look like down the road if and when needs change?

Additional Resources

• You may find this free online course of help. Should I Move Mom? 
• Types of Long-Term Care (article from the Aging Wisdom blog)
• Choosing the Right Long-Term Care Facility (an article from AARP)

Interested in exploring and planning for long-term care housing and not sure where to start? We can help! Schedule a free get-acquainted call today. 

This podcast is part of a longer conversation between Nicole Amico Kane, Director of Care Management at Aging Wisdom, and Brenda Dodd, Director of Training and Special Projects at Áegis Living. 

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

• How Continuing Care Retirement Communities Work (AARP webpage)
• Washington state DSHS CCRC Registry

Interested in exploring and planning for long-term care housing and not sure where to start? We can help! Schedule a free get-acquainted call today to learn more about your situation and to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs. 

This podcast is part of a longer conversation between Nicole Amico Kane, Director of Care Management at Aging Wisdom, and Brenda Dodd, Director of Training and Special Projects at Áegis Living. 

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• You may find this free online course of help. Should I Move Mom? Understand the options and build confidence in helping an older loved one to move to a retirement community.
• Types of Long-Term Care (article from the Aging Wisdom blog)
• Choosing the Right Long-Term Care Facility (an article from AARP)

This podcast is part of a longer conversation between Nicole Amico Kane, Director of Care Management at Aging Wisdom, and Brenda Dodd, Director of Training and Special Projects at Áegis Living. 

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Resources

• Paying for Care (National Institute on Aging webpage) 
• Parents Reluctant to Spend Money on Their Own Care (Aging Wisdom blog)
• Should I Move Mom? free online course from Aging Wisdom
• The Cost of Senior Housing and Long-term Care: Will it break the bank? online course from Aging Wisdom

This podcast is part of a longer conversation between Nicole Amico Kane, Director of Care Management at Aging Wisdom, and Brenda Dodd, Director of Training and Special Projects at Áegis Living on "Navigating Care and Housing Options." 

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• Health and medical related changes, oftentimes memory and cognitive changes. 
• Supports and services such as a professional caregiver, a companion, or household help, have been brought into the home, but the efforts have failed. 
• The supports that have been brought into the home are no longer enough. 
• A family member or friend has been the primary caregiving support at home, and they feel their caregiving responsibilities are no longer sustainable. Caregiving is taking a toll on their health and well-being. 
• A consideration we've paid more attention to during the pandemic is that home can be isolating for someone who's aging in place because the world is just a little too small.
• The cost of  care is no longer financially sustainable. When you start to need a lot of care at home, things can get expensive real fast, and costs can become prohibitive especially when you're thinking about longer range planning and how resources will support someone over their lifetime. That's an important consideration. 

Every family and every situation is different. Understanding the landscape and planning for what's to come can save a lot of stress and heartache in the long-run.

Our Aging Life Care Professionals (aka geriatric Care Managers) have the experience and knowledge to guide families on planning for today as well as the future.  

• Why is Change So Hard? (an Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Seven Signs an Older Loved One May Need Help (an Aging Wisdom blog article)
• What is Aging Life Care? (an Aging Wisdom fact sheet) 

Not quite sure what steps to take next? You can schedule a free call with us to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

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if you live in the greater Seattle area, CLICK HERE to schedule a FREE get-acquainted call today.

If you live outside the greater Seattle area, click here to find an Aging Life Care Professional near you.

This is an excerpt of a longer conversation between Lisa Mayfield, Aging Wisdom's founder and principal, and Laura Vaillancourt, MA, LMHC, GMHS on her 'Life on Repeat podcast'. 

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And then other families will have an Aging Life Care Professional involved in a much deeper, ongoing way.  Whether that be checking in on their parents, where they're living in assisted living, or an adult family home, or coordinating doctor's appointments, going with the parent to a doctor's appointment to be able to make sure the doctor understands what's happening. Being able to follow through and be an ongoing emotional support as well as problem solver and advocate along the way.

This is an excerpt of a longer conversation between Lisa Mayfield, Aging Wisdom's founder and principal, and Laura Vaillancourt, MA, LMHC, GMHS on her 'Life on Repeat podcast'. 

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

• Surviving and Soothing Sibling Strife When Caring for Aging Parents (Aging Wisdom blog)
• Bringing families together when there's conflict (Aging Wisdom podcast)
• The Empowered Caregiver by Linda Fordini-Johnson (book we highly recommend)
• When Your Aging Parent Needs Help by Leslie Kernisan, MD, and Paula Spencer Scott (another book we highly recommend)

This is an excerpt of a longer conversation between Laura Vaillancourt on her Life on Repeat podcast and Lisa Mayfield, Aging Wisdom's founder and principal. 

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• What is Long Term Care? (downloadable fact sheet)
• The Toughest Conversation: Retiring the Keys (downloadable fact sheet)
• Helping feuding families achieve harmony (podcast)
• Burnout Can Happen to Anyone (downloadable E-book)
• The Dance: Finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent (Aging Wisdom blog)

Could you benefit from the guidance of a Care Manager and live in the greater Seattle area?  Click here to schedule a free get acquainted call and to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

Looking for a Care Manager outside the Seattle area? Click here.

This is an excerpt of a longer conversation between Laura Vaillancourt on her Life on Repeat podcast and Lisa Mayfield, Aging Wisdom's founder and principal.

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• The Dance: Finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent  (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Self-Care is Not Selfish: It's Essential for Family Caregiver Well-Being  (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• The Fragile Years: Proven Strategies for the Care of Aging Loved Ones by Amy Cameron O'Rourke
• What We Carry. A Memoir by Maya Shanbhag Lang

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• Why I Became An Aging Life Care Professional by Harisa Paco
• What is an Aging Life Care Manager?
• Proactive Planning: Draft a road map that helps you prepare for the future

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One suggestion Lisa makes is to ask your parent directly: "How will we know when it’s time for you to move? What will be the signs for us that it is no longer safe for you to be at home?”

This approach is open-ended and less confrontational.

Be patient and listen, truly listen. These simple yet straightforward questions might be the beginning of some wonderful communication and collaborative planning.

Helpful resources and reading:

• The Dance: Finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent (Aging Wisdom blog post)
• Seven Signs an Aging Loved One May Need Help (Aging Wisdom blog post)
• Know Your Options: The Pros and Cons of Living at Home as You Age (Aging Wisdom blog post)
• What is Long Term Care? (a downloadable Aging Wisdom fact sheet)
• Six Hidden Cost to Caring for an Aging Loved One (a downloadable Aging Wisdom EBook) 
• Engage a Care Manager. Aging Wisdom Care Managers are experts in aging and helping individuals and families prepare for and navigate options for aging, caring, and living well. You can schedule a free get-acquainted call with us by clicking here. 
  • If you live outside the greater Seattle area, you can check the Aging Life Care Association, our professional association, for a care manager in your area by clicking here.

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• Meet our colleague Harisa Paco: Why I Became an Aging Life Care Professional
• Who are Aging Wisdom's Aging Life Care Professionals? Read more.
• To learn more about Aging Life Care, click here.
• What are Aging Wisdom's services? Download our Services brochure.
• Schedule a free, get-acquainted call with Aging Wisdom to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.
• Don't live in the greater Seattle area? Find an Aging Life Care professional near you.

This was an excerpt of a long conversation that Lisa Mayfield, our found and principal, had with Dr. Jane Tornatore, and Joanie Parsons or RevelEleven. You can listen to their enriching discussion HERE. 

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Where to begin? 

• Online resources can be overwhelmingly abundant. One positive place to start is Better Health While Aging, a website started by geriatrician Leslie Kernisan, MD, MPH. Dr. Kernisan understands the landscape of aging, how it impacts families, and offers a comprehensive overview of topics and common concerns. She’s also co-written a book – When Your Aging Parent Needs Help – that you may find helpful.
• Engage a Care Manager. Aging Wisdom Care Managers are experts in aging and helping individuals and families prepare for and navigate options for aging, caring, and living well. You can schedule a free get-acquainted call with us by clicking here. 
  • If you live outside the greater Seattle area, you can check the Aging Life Care Association, our professional association, for a care manager in your area by clicking here.
• Cost of Long-Term Care. The Genworth Cost of Care Survey is a great place to start to understand the potential cost of long-term care in your parents' geographic area. The cost of that care varies based on care setting, geographic location of care and level of care required, among other things.
• Support groups can be a great place to start. If your parent has dementia, for example, the Alzheimer’s Association likely has a family caregiver support group in your area. Most groups are virtual now due to the COVID pandemic. Many community and senior centers, as well as healthcare systems offer support groups as well. The insights of others on a similar journey are invaluable. 
• Your local library. In addition to books and other resource materials, many libraries offer classes and activities. Check the events board or calendar for specifics.

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• Seven Signs An Aging Older One Needs Help a downloadable checklist
• What Is Long Term Care? a downloadable resource guide
• What's in an Alzheimer's test? from the Aging Wisdom blog
• Should I Move Mom? a free online course at Aging Wisdom University

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A Care Manager is an essential tool in a client’s and their family’s toolbox of resources and supports.

The many systems that clients and their families encounter while garnering care and support -- be it at home, in a retirement community, or a hospital or clinical setting -- can be daunting and filled with barriers, U-turns, and the unexpected. 

Care Managers understand this. We can anticipate, plan for, and avert a lot of the challenges. We also know how to ask the right questions, communicate with allied professionals, and advocate on behalf of clients. 

We are adept at and deal with these situations every day. 

In this podcast, our colleague Sheila McKannay provides a snapshot of the many ways a Care Manager can offer guidance, coordination, crisis intervention, and most importantly, peace of mind. 

RESOURCES

·      What is Aging Life Care? – fact sheet

·      The Dance: Finding Balance When Helping an Aging Parent – article 

·      Aging Wisdom’s Services brochure – downloadable 

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There can be a ripple effect if we aren’t careful. Vision, hearing, and foot care all play key roles in health maintenance and fall risk prevention.  Our eyes, ears, and feet also support our ability to get regular exercise. And regular exercise can contribute to so many positives: strength, balance, overall well-being, appetite, mental acuity and cognition, a good night’s sleep.

Other things that could contribute to fall risk?:

• Trouble sleeping that could lead to tiredness, lack of focus. This article on Increasing concentration and focus may be helpful.
• Medications – review possible side effects of each prescription and supplement; be careful about drug interactions (known as polypharmacy)
• Alcohol consumption – too much alcohol can contribute to falls; also, be cautious about alcohol consumption and medications. 
• Alcohol can also contribute to dehydration. 
• Dehydration – are you getting enough fluids? Dehydration can result in numerous problems such as light-headedness, constipation, lethargy.  This article on Hydration by our colleague Juliet may be helpful. 
• Assistive devices being used incorrectly or not being used when they should
• Uncomfortable or ill-fitting shoes; shoes with slippery soles. 
• Foot problems not being addressed. Foot care and finding the right shoes can help considerably with balance, walking comfort, and physical activity.
• Safety risks immediately within and outside your home setting. A Care Manager can provide a consultation and risk assessment of your home, and even help with home modification and maintenance recommendations. This article on Aging in Place should help you plan. This article on Age-friendly exteriors may prove insightful as well.

Who to engage in minimizing falls:

• Health care professionals such as your primary care physician (PCP), eye doctor, and foot doctor
• This includes your pharmacist, who may have insights on drug interactions and side effects. (Preventing Falls: 10 Types of Medications to Review if You’re Concerned About Falling)
• When recommended, a Physical Therapist  or Occupational Therapist
• Doctor-approved or -recommended exercise program online, at a community or senior center, or regular walks with friends
• And Aging Life Care expert (aka Care Manager); we can provide a home safety assessment, recommendations on home modification, and consultation to ensure safety and risk prevention measures are implemented.

Curious about what a home safety assessment provides? You can schedule a free get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers to get the conversation started. Click here to schedule a call today!

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Health care providers have our best interests at heart. They help us maintain good health and overcome or manage a health condition. Being open and honest with them is important. If they don't know about something, they can't help us. 

Talk with your doctor if you:

• have a concern about your balance
• aren’t feeling as well as you usually do 
• have concerns about the medications and supplements you're taking
• have had a stumble and you’re afraid of a fall 

Remember your primary care physician is there for you, to help you.

Our colleague Sheila McKannay, Certified Care Manager, offers insights and encouragement about partnering with your health care provider and pharmacist to address overall health, any concerns we may have, and how to engagement them in assessing and lower our risk of a fall. There are several health-related issues that might concern you, be it blood pressure, poor balance, medications and their side effects, use of assistive devices, knee and foot pain. But your primary care physician can help ease concerns and help with a plan forward. 

Team with healthcare professionals (this may also include a referral to a Physical Therapist) to improve balance, strength, and endurance. Falls prevention truly is a team effort. 

Physical activity and movement are good for us physically, mentally, and socially. Engage friends and family involved. Spend time outside, get some fresh air and Vitamin D. Don’t forget your senior or community center as a value resource for programs and supports to keep you fit, motivated, and engaged. This can all add to our well-being and minimize our risk of falls. 

Not sure where to start? Schedule a consultation with one of our Certified Care Managers. CLICK HERE to schedule a free, get-acquainted call. 

RESOURCES

• Preventing Falls: 10 Types of Medications to Review if You’re Concerned About Falling - Better Health While Aging website blog article
• Enhance Fitness
• Northshore Senior Center – YouTube channel – yoga 
• Seattle Parks and Recreation Lifelong Recreation 
• Check your local senior or community center, or Y for classes!

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Falls are not a normal part of aging. It's a great time to engage friends and family in an assessment of your home.   

Here are a few tips to get you started:

• Keep floors and walkways clear of clutter and tripping hazards (shoes, boxes, pet accessories, your purse, books and magazines, etc.)

• Remove  or secure throw rugs; move furniture from walking pathways

• Improve visibility through interior and exterior lighting 

• Clip or tape cords securely to walls or floors

• Outside: Repair and mark uneven thresholds with contrasting tape or paint

You can reduce your risk of falling with regular exercise, reviewing medications with a health care provider, getting your eyes checked annually, and making your home safer by improving lighting and cleaning tripping hazards.

Could you benefit from a Falls Risk Assessment? Schedule a free, get-acquainted call today with one of Aging Wisdom's Certified Care Managers today to explore the benefits.

Resources

• Six Steps to Prevent a Fall (and Injury)
• Get a Leg Up on Falls Prevention
• Falls Prevention, Assessment, and Evaluating Risk

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• Should I Move Mom? a free Aging Wisdom University online mini-course
• When an ailing parent needs more care, sibling conflicts can arise and add to stress (article: Washington Post)
• Can Freedom and Safety Co-exist? (original content on Aging Wisdom's blog)
• Find an Aging Life Care professional (aka Care Manager) near you

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• Offering to have housekeeping assistance once a week
• Hiring a landscaping company to maintain the yard
• Transportation assistance to appointments and/or outings
• Grocery delivery to the home and/or hiring a chef to prepare meals
• Companionship care like an Aging Wisdom Creative Engagement Specialist
• Bringing in a professional caregiver once a week for a few hours to assist with medication management, bathing assistance, meals 

Need guidance on the delicate dance of balancing independence and autonomy with safety?  That's an area of expertise for our team. Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers. 

Helpful Links:

• Can freedom and safety co-exist? 
• Should I Move Mom?  an Aging Wisdom University online mini-course
• What is Aging Life Care? 
• Ambiguous Loss pioneered by Pauline Boss, Ph.D.

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Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

Feeling overwhelmed with your journey as a family caregiver? We can help! Schedule a free get-acquainted call with us today.

Additional Reading

• Family Caregivers, Don't Let Your Flame Fizzle

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• When Your Parent Refuses Help: How to move forward
• The Dance: finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent
• What is Aging Life Care?

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• Mail piling up or in complete disarray. Bills going unpaid. Utilities being turned off due to lack of payment.
• Managing finances is becoming a challenge, which is unusual for your Dad, who is a retired accountant.
• Spoiled or sparse food in the refrigerator. Many items in the pantry are well past their expiration date. There's no evidence of meal preparation other than an open bag of store-bought cookies on the counter. Perhaps there's noticeable weight loss.
• Parents who were once active and engaged socially are isolating at home or doing less. 
• Driving is a concern.  Dad's getting lost in familiar places. Or your parents' car has an excessive number of scraps and dents which your father can't explain and your mom dismisses as minor. 

Not sure what your next steps should be? We’ve helped hundreds of families navigate these concerns and changes. Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers.

Additional Reading & Resources

• Seven Signs an Older Loved One May Need Help
• Retiring the Keys
• Alzheimer's and Dementia Care Management and Planning Services

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With anosognosia, or lack of insight, the frontal lobe of the brain is impaired. The frontal lobe is responsible for higher cognitive functions such as memory, reasoning, social understanding, executive functioning, impulse control, problem solving, social interaction, and motor function. 

The person experiencing lack of insight is unaware of their condition.

It’s not unusual for family members to misinterpret their loved one’s lack of insight or awareness as denial.  Denial is a coping mechanism, a psychological response to something that is uncomfortable or difficult to accept. It is not anosognosia though on the surface they may resemble one another in how someone reacts to certain situations.

In these situations, Aging Wisdom helps families understand these changes and work with them. We guide you in how to shift your perspective, expectations, and approach as you provide the person in your care with the support they need.

Challenged by a parent’s lack of awareness and not sure how to move forward? We can help. If you live in the greater Seattle or Bellevue area, schedule a free get-acquainted call with us at Aging Wisdom to explore how we can be a support.

READ MORE HERE: My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of Insight May Be the Reason

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The topic of moving may prompt your parent to bristle at the suggestion. They resist the idea for a myriad of reasons: Home is familiar.  They’re overwhelmed by all their stuff. Change is hard. The uncertainty is scary.

Sometimes the resistance stems from an outdated perception of a retirement community. They envision the old hospital-model nursing home. “You won’t ship me off to a home,” is a common response. 

Don't let an outdated view of senior housing keep the person in your care from exploring what could be a life changing and life enriching move.

Pack your patience, as this usually takes time and persistence, but it's always worthwhile in the long run.

A move to a retirement community, once it happens, often feels like the enormous burden of home maintenance, navigation of stairs, lawn care, grocery shopping and meal preparation has been lifted! We have seen this scenario time and again in our work.

And there's the added benefit of a safe community, with lots of opportunities for social, intellectual, and creative engagement.

But how do you get there? How do you move forward? Click here to Schedule A Call with one of our Certified Care Managers. This “Get Acquainted” call is an opportunity to learn more about your situation and determine whether our services fit your needs.

Additional Resources

• You may also enjoy these online courses offered through Aging Wisdom University to help you navigate the best solutions for your family's situation. 
• A Move to a Retirement Community Could Mean More Independence for Your Parent 

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Planning ahead with a few simple steps can help you help your older loved ones make peace with their “stuff.” 

Check out these Aging Wisdom blogs for tips on understanding resistance to a move, managing belongings, and making a move less overwhelming: 

• Should It Stay or Should It Go? Making Peace with Our ‘Stuff’ 
• Uncertainty is Scary: Uncertainty Might Be Why Your Parent is Resisting a Move
• Getting rid of your stuff

Looking for guidance as you navigate resistance and managing "right-sizing"?  We are the experts! Click here to schedule a Get-Acquainted call today to get started.

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Click here to schedule a FREE get-acquainted call today.

Additional Resources:

• Resistance to Care is a Common Challenge: What’s the Best Path Forward?

• My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of Insight May Be the Reason

• Uncertainty is Scary. Uncertainty Might Be Why Your Parent is Resisting A Move.

• Aging Wisdom University course: Should I Move Mom?

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• Thriving through life transitions 
• What is the Secret to Aging Well? 
• Father's Day and the Power of Story
• Aging Wisdom Services Brochure

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• What is Aging LIfe Care? 
• Get in the Lifeboat: Don't Float Alone! Key Supports You'll Want in Your Boat 
• Alzheimer's and the Family Caregiver 
• Medical Emergencies: Are you prepared?

Could you benefit from the guidance of a Care Manager who looks at the whole picture?  Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call and to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

This is an excerpt of a longer conversation between Laura Vaillancourt on her Life on Repeat podcast and Lisa Mayfield, Aging Wisdom's founder and principal. 

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• Get in the Lifeboat: But Don’t Float Alone! Key Supports You’ll Want in Your Boat
• Lack of Insight or Awareness: When the person in your care doesn’t see the changes you see
• Seven Signs an Older Loved One Needs Help

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• 8 Tips for Aging Well: Make Your Plan Now for a Healthy, Supported Future
• What is Aging Life Care?
• Aging Wisdom Senior Care Services

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What is an Aging Life Care?  What is an Aging Life Care Manager?

Aging Life Care is a holistic, client-centered approach to caring for older adults, dependent adults, and others facing ongoing health challenges.

Aging Life Care Managers®, sometimes called geriatric care managers, are strategic planners with key knowledge and expertise in health and disability, housing, family, crisis intervention, advocacy, legal, financial, and local resources. We work with individuals and their families to help navigate the complexities and issues that arise with a change in health.

We provide an unbiased, yet informed perspective.

As our professional colleague in Florida, Amy O’Rourke says: we have a Crystal Ball into the future.  Although each of us is an individual, with a unique history, there are some aspects of aging that can be anticipated as a result of certain conditions or circumstances. We understand the trajectory of a myriad of scenarios if left unaddressed. Our knowledge, experience, and expertise are the crystal ball.

We help families in the midst of “overwhelm” to navigate options for aging well, caring well, and living well.

• What is Aging Life Care? (a downloadable fact sheet)
• What is an Aging Life Care Manager? (an Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Alzheimer’s and the Family Caregiver (an Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Medical emergencies: Are you prepared? (an Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Aging Life Care Association

Could you benefit from the wisdom and experience of a Care Manager? CLICK HERE to schedule a get-acquainted call with Aging Wisdom to determine together whether our services are a good fit for your needs.

This is an excerpt of a longer conversation between Laura Vaillancourt on her Life on Repeat podcast and Lisa Mayfield, Aging Wisdom’s founder and principal. 

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Additional Resources

• Community and Dementia
• Creativity, Connection, and Dementia
• A Move Could Mean More Independence 
• Aging Wisdom University, your guide to aging well, caring well, and living well

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Whenever there’s an opportunity to return to what brings a client joy, we’ll go there in some capacity. Quality of life and well-being are at the heart of our work.  

Listen as our colleagues Tami Sandygren and Keri Pollock explore what that looks like. 

Want a more personalized and tailored approach to long-term care? Click here to schedule a get-acquainted call with one of our Certified Care Managers to explore what that might look like. 

Additional Reading

• 10 Step to Set Yourself Up for Success in Your Retirement
• The Power of Planning: Taking Charge of Your Own Aging Journey
• Creativity, Connection, and Dementia
•  Communication and Dementia

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• Check out our Aging Wisdom blog, other podcasts, and online university for information relevant to your family's situation.
• University of Washington Memory & Brain Wellness Center (UWMBWC)
• The Memory Hub, a program of the UWMBWC
• Greenwood Senior Center Memory Loss Programs
• Elderwise
• The Frye Art Museum's Creative Aging programs
• King County Library System (KCLS) events for older adults (55+)

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• What is Aging Life Care?
• Assembling Your Support Team
• Subscribe to the Aging Wisdom blog

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“The IRS does not email, text, or call you. If the IRS needs to communicate with you because there's a problem with your taxes, they send you a letter -- snail mail, good old US mail. It's part of the government,” says Herb.

“They do not contact you any other way, and they don't ask you for instantaneous payments on the phone, or ‘you’ve got to pay us right now’ in any way, shape, or form, in any manner of currency. It's just not the way it works.”

“The only time the IRS may ever call you is if you're in the middle of a negotiation with them, and you've already had something ongoing, and they may call or email you. But never the first contact. The first contact from government agencies -- whether that's Medicare, Social Security, the Internal Revenue Service -- the initial contact is always via US mail. “

“If it comes in any other form of digital communication or the phone, it is a scam! Run away as fast as you can before they steal your money!” 

Herb’s Final Tip in this digital world: “There's no undo button if you give somebody your so security number if you type in your bank account number. Whatever it is and push submit. It's gone. There's no getting it back. So you have to stop and think on the front end if you're not sure just put them on hold.”

 Links to Consumers’ Checkbook articles from Herb:

·      Fraud Alert: Customer Service Imposter Scams

·      Fraud Alert: Phone Scams Involving Amazon Impersonators Are Skyrocketing

ABOUT HERB WEISBAUM: After 22 years and about 6,500 daily consumer tips, recently Herb hung up his headset for the last time and retired from Northwest Newsradio (KNWN). Thankfully, he’s still writing for Consumers’ Checkbook and hosting their bi-weekly Consumerpedia podcast. If you visit Herb’s ConsumerMan website, you can sign up for his free weekly newsletter and stay up to date on the latest consumer news. 

What Do I Do If I Suspect Elder Abuse, Neglect, or Exploitation? If you are concerned about a vulnerable adult, call 911 or your local adult protective services agency. In Washington State, call 866-END-HARM.

Not sure what to do next? Contact Aging Wisdom and one of our Aging Life Care Professionals can provide expert consultation and care management. With an objective perspective on the situation, we facilitate difficult family discussions and decision-making to address these and other concerns. To meet with an Aging Wisdom Aging Life Care Professional, schedule a free, get-acquainted call.

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Romance scams: If you’re in love with someone you’ve never met in person, “odds are these days you’ve fallen in love with a criminal,” Herb said. “The picture is bogus. All the stuff they tell you is bogus. What they’ll do is tell you that they’re overseas and the pitch is ‘I’m a savvy crypto investor. I’ll send you screenshots of all the money I’ve made, and I want you to make that money as well. So that when we finally get together, we’re going to live in the lap of luxury.’” He continued: “Before you know it, they’ve drained your bank account. I’ve spoken with people who have lost their life savings over a romance scam, and they’ll never see their money again. If somebody starts asking for money in any form, you should run for the hills as fast as you possibly can.” 

• Read this AARP Fraud Watch article for more information: 10 Telltale Signs of a Romance Scam

 Password managers and two-factor authentication: “Passwords are the key to our lives and most people use horrible passwords because they’re hard to remember,” Herb said. “Simple passwords can all be cracked by con artists in seconds. The mistake people make is using a lousy password and using it repeatedly. You need a strong password, 10 to 12 characters long.” Herb continued: “You can either write passwords down and keep them by your desk; the odds of somebody breaking into your house and getting those passwords is significantly lower than somebody breaking into your account if your password is 123abc.  

A password manager is a tool that you access from your computer. The password manager can create and store strong passwords and create different passwords for each of your accounts. And if you want the password manager on multiple devices, it’s a very small fee.” 

Herb also encourages readers to use two-factor authentication with any important accounts. That means that, before you can log on, you will either get a telephone call, text message, or e-mail with a unique code that is used for authentication. According to Herb, accounts with two-factor authentication are 99.9 percent hackproof. 

• For more information, read Herb’s article, How to Create and Easily Store Secure Passwords

ABOUT HERB WEISBAUM: After 22 years and about 6,500 daily consumer tips, recently Herb hung up his headset for the last time and retired from Northwest Newsradio (KNWN). Thankfully, he’s still writing for Consumers’ Checkbook and hosting their bi-weekly Consumerpedia podcast. If you visit Herb’s ConsumerMan website, you can sign up for his free weekly newsletter and stay up to date on the latest consumer news.

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• Scammers, fraudsters, and consumer protection: One story Herb did recently was about digital coupons. You may think that if you have the club card from that store, you’re going to get the digital price automatically. You’re not—unless you load that digital coupon into your account. Grocery retailers are making millions and millions of dollars on people who think they’re saving money when they’re not. 
• Herb published two articles on this topic: 
  • Supermarkets’ Digital Offers Leave Tech-Challenged Senior Without Valuable Discounts  
  • Consumer Advocates Urge Supermarkets to Stop Digital Discount Discrimination
• Protect your personal information*: Herb warns us not to give out personal information unless we’ve initiated the phone call or initiated the online experience. “No one should ever need your password, PIN code, or login information,” he said. “A lot of criminals right now are pretending to be customer service representatives. Some of these scammers will contact you on the phone and say ‘Hi, I’m calling from Amazon. There’s a problem with your account.’ Some of them will send out email or text messages saying they’re from your bank. Don’t click on links in the email! But do click on the links below to learn more about these scams.” 
• Read Herb’s Fraud Alert articles on this topic: 
  • Fraud Alert: Customer Service Imposter Scams
  • Fraud Alert: Phone Scams Involving Amazon Impersonators Are Skyrocketing

*PLEASE NOTE: We'll cover Password Managers and Two-Factor Authentication in next week's Wisdom Wednesday podcast with Herb.

ABOUT HERB WEISBAUM: After 22 years and about 6,500 daily consumer tips, recently Herb hung up his headset for the last time and retired from Northwest Newsradio (KNWN). Thankfully, he’s still writing for Consumers’ Checkbook and hosting their bi-weekly Consumerpedia podcast. If you visit Herb’s ConsumerMan website, you can sign up for his free weekly newsletter and stay up to date on the latest consumer news.

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

At other times, families can feel overwhelmed and as if their issues are insurmountable. An experienced Care Manager as a navigator can help bring down the anxiety level and help families see that they're not alone.  

Everyone who facilitates a meeting might do it differently, but as Lisa Mayfield shares, when she’s facilitating a meeting, the ground rules are:

• Everybody listens.
• Everyone has a chance to speak. 
• Everyone gets to be heard. 
• No interrupting when somebody is speaking. 
• No one leaves the room in the middle of a meeting. 

As Lisa acknowledges, “What tends to happen is people might get emotional whether they’re sad or angry, and their first reaction is to run. I set up in the beginning that people need to stay to the end. But I also remind people at the beginning that emotions will come up.  When you’re caring for a parent, it’s really emotional. I’m not sure I’ve ever been in a family meeting where somebody didn’t cry or get angry, that emotions come up, and I like them to know that that will happen so that they’re not surprised by it. And if I tell them that will happen it sort of normalizes it.”

Family meetings are effective. Having everyone in the same room, with a skilled person facilitating the conversation can make a huge difference. Sometimes it takes several meetings, depending upon the level of conflict, the number of unresolved issues, and how much people need to talk and be heard.  

Nicole Amico Kane reflects “I think it can be helpful for the Care Manager to put some structure on the meetings. For a lot of families, that may very well be the first time in a while that they’ve all gotten together around the same table, talking about what their concerns are for their parent. Without some structure in place, those meetings could go on and on and ultimately be unproductive. So that’s where the Care Manager comes in to really help with that, to keep everyone on task, and to make sure everyone has an opportunity for their point of view to be heard. And it’s not just one or two people dominating the conversation. So, we certainly can help with that.“ 

“And then the other thing I think can be helpful is just making sure that there‘s some priority setting. Oftentimes there’s a lot that gets shared, and sometimes it’s too much to be dealt with in one meeting. So, we can help pay attention to everything that’s being discussed and ultimately help the family recognize that we may not solve all those problems today so let’s just focus on a few priorities.”

Family conversations and finding common ground about what's best for your parent isn’t always easy. With the help of a neutral professional such as an Aging Life Care Professional (aka Geriatric Care Manager), you can improve communication, as well as prioritize solutions.

Schedule a free, get-acquainted call with one of our Care Managers by CLICKING HERE. 

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Family meetings are also a great way to facilitate communication between family members and build consensus about next steps in a situation that may be escalating.

Through a family meeting, everyone is getting the same information at the same time. There are opportunities for questions and clarification. And it’s also a conversation where family members can comfortably and safely share.

In this week’s podcast, Lisa and Nicole reflect on how Care Managers facilitate family meetings and consultations and can help siblings settle differences, come to consensus, and feel heard in the midst of difficult decisions and challenging dynamics. 

Struggling with siblings over decisions impacting your parent/s? We can serve as a neutral, unbiased navigator to help your family find agreement and move forward. Click here to schedule a free, get-acquainted call with a Certified Care Manager to get the conversation started.

Resources and Additional Reading

• When an ailing parent needs more care, sibling conflicts can arise and add to stress (article: Washington Post)
• Clash of the Siblings: How to navigate family dynamics when your parent needs help (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Surviving and Soothing Sibling Strife When Caring for Aging Parents (Aging Wisdom blog article)

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• help diffuse family disagreements
• offer support in communication and advocacy 
• provide effective navigation through a myriad of challenges and symptoms
• make recommendations based on our knowledge and experience

And as Lisa reflects, sometimes the missing piece is a good system of communication. Having someone like a Care Manager who can assist the family in finding effective ways to communicate with one another and create ways of sharing information helps to fill in the information gaps and provide all family members with the same information about a parent.

Diffusing family disagreements and finding common ground about what's best for your parent isn’t always easy. With the help of an objective professional such as an Aging Life Care Professional (aka Geriatric Care Manager), you can find balance, as well as solutions.

Schedule a free, get-acquainted call with one of our Care Managers by CLICKING HERE.

Additional Reading

• What is an Aging Life Care Manager?
• Alzheimer's and the Family Caregiver
• Clash of the Siblings: How to navigate family dynamics when your parent needs help

Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and LinkedIn. 

Challenged by a parent's lack of awareness and not sure how to move forward? If you live in the greater Seattle-Bellevue area, schedule a free get-acquainted call with us at Aging Wisdom to explore how we can be a support.

Resources and Additional Reading

• My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of Insight May Be the Reason
• Seven Signs an Older Loved One May Need Help
• What is Aging Life Care?

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• Clash of the Siblings: How to navigate family dynamics when your parent needs help (Aging Wisdom blog article) 
• Surviving and Soothing Sibling Strife When Caring for Aging Parents  (Aging Wisdom blog article)
• Can freedom and safety co-exist?  (Aging Wisdom blog article) https://agingwisdom.com/can-freedom-and-safety-co-exist/ 
• When an ailing parent needs more care, sibling conflicts can arise and add to stress (article: Washington Post)

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• Self-Care is Not Selfish: It's Essential for Family Caregiver Well-Being
• The Dance: Finding Balance When Helping an Aging Parent

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Risk assessment and risk tolerance play a part as well, especially if the person in your care is living with Alzheimer’s or another dementia.

Is mom OK living alone? Can dad safely drive his car, even if it is only to and from the grocery store? Is Aunt Mary a fall risk and broken hip just waiting to happen? These are important questions to which honest answers will help you to move forward with planning, mitigating risk, while honoring a parent's wishes, within reason.

Wendy touches on several challenges to getting someone the help they need. Are siblings a barrier? Is denial a factor? How about your parent? Are they resistant to support due to a lack of insight or awareness?

Recognizing and acknowledging these hindrances can lead you to finding the solution to overcoming or addressing them.

Sometimes you need an objective third party like us. As Aging Life Care experts, we help families navigate these obstacles every day. Our goal is the same as yours: respecting the autonomy and independence of the person in your care, while minimizing risk, optimizing safety, and enhancing quality of life.

Still challenged by obstacles? We can help. Click here to schedule a free, get-acquainted call today.

Additional Resources

• Clash of the Siblings: How to navigate family dynamics when your parent needs help
• The Dance: Finding Balance with Helping an Aging Parent
• Resistance to Care is a Common Challenge: What’s the Best Path Forward?
• My Mom Refuses to Accept Help! Lack of Insight May Be the Reason

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• What is Aging Life Care?
• Get in the Lifeboat: Don't Float Alone! Key Supports You Need
• What is an Aging Life Care Manager?
• Aging Wisdom Services brochure 

This is part of a long conversation between our colleague Wendy Nathan, a Certified Care Manager here at Aging Wisdom, and Sandra Cook, Regional VP of Sales, Aegis Living. 

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