🎙️ Mad & Crip Theology Podcast – Micah Perez & iowyth ulthiin 

In this episode, Amy Panton and Miriam Spies sit down with two remarkable contributors to the Fall 2024 issue of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability: Micah and io. Together, they explore the complexities of embodiment, spirituality, artistic expression, and the deep work of healing.

Io shares reflections on their piece, Before and After Gravity, a series of intimate drawings born out of a need for sacred focus. Yhese works explore the sublime as a site of queer spiritual connection. Through processing intimacy, desire, and the deep ache for alignment, io evokes the fragile power of touch and the repair of closeness as both vital and dangerous: “It is the spice… our vital interdependencies where our life resides.”

Micah offers a powerful narrative of identity and resistance, shaped by her experiences as a neurodivergent, Christian, Filipino-Australian woman living with multiple invisible chronic health conditions. In her work, she traces the long arc of coming into clarity and self-description despite persistent societal and institutional discrimination. 

The conversation ranges from vulnerability in creative and scholarly spaces to the embodied politics of belonging. As always, listeners are invited to contribute to the journal—through poetry, essays, art, teaching reflections, and more.

Read Michah's piece here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44509

Read io's piece here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44515

Watch with captions on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/KH0Q2RlPxy4

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In this episode, we sit down with Laura C. Robb and Corey Parish to explore the heart of their contributions to the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health, and Disability.

Laura shares her reflections on holistic care – what it means to treat health and theology as deeply interconnected – and invites us into the layered questions she holds when navigating systems of care as a disabled theologian. She also explores what it might mean to understand the Trinity through the lens of holistic theology.

Corey offers a tender account of receiving an autism diagnosis later in life and how that journey shaped his sense of home and belonging. He speaks to the power of unexpected places, and how his doctoral work seeks to hold space for autistic theologies that emerge from lived experience.

Together, their voices invite us into a theology that is grounded, embodied, and spacious.

Read the full articles here:
Laura’s article: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44508
Corey’s article: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44502

Watch on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/IpBYXApRSt0

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In this episode of the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, we sit down with Kay Louise Aldred and Kathie Schneider to explore spiritual abuse, belonging, and faith through neurodivergent and disabled lenses.

Kay talks about the urgent need for safeguarding in faith and wellness spaces, especially for neurodivergent women and girls, and shares red and green flags for healthy spiritual communities. Kathie reflects on her life as a blind theologian, her evolving relationship with faith, and how metaphors in scripture can either harm or heal. We ask honest, grounding questions about prayer, interdependence, abuse, and what it means to truly belong.

Based on Kay's piece “Safeguarding Neurodivergent Individuals from Spiritual Abuse” and Kathie’s “Blind Faith: Beyond ‘Amazing Grace’” from the Fall 2024 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability.

Watch on YT here: https://youtu.be/kFo3DLU8KLk

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In this episode of the Mad & Crip Theology Podcast, Amy and Miriam are joined by special guest Luna Harlow for a thoughtful, grounded conversation on spiritual trauma and the beauty of storytelling. Together, they explore how faith communities can harm and heal, and how naming our experiences can open up space for care, reflection, and resistance. Expect some Friday brain moments, community updates, and a lot of honesty.

✨ Mentioned in this episode:

-The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health & Disability is accepting new work for our Fall 2025 issue!
-New spring merch from the Press 🎉

-Resources recommended by Luna in the episode:

1. Laura Anderson, When Religion Hurts You: Healing from Religious Trauma and the Impact of High-Control Religion. 
2. Michelle Panchuk, "The Shattered Spiritual Self: A Philosophical Exploration of Religious Trauma" Res Philosophica.

Join us for this gentle, important conversation at the intersections of theology, mental health, and disability justice.

Watch on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/uWSk0NXu5LY

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In this episode, we sit down with Laura and Beth Anne to explore the intersections of grief, disability, memory, and creativity. 

Laura reflects on the complexities of being a sibling to a disabled brother, Matt, and how writing transformed the way she shows up in that relationship. We talk about how medical systems shape our understanding of identity and how memory can both anchor and shift our sense of self and family.

Beth Anne shares how collage has become a spiritual and emotional practice, offering a space to hold absence, womanhood, and the sacredness of embodied life. We talk openly about miscarriage, and how grief and longing show up in their art. This conversation moves through themes of fruitfulness, theological expectations around gender, and the healing power of creating a home for our emotions.

This episode holds space for tenderness, creative expression, and the many ways we find meaning through storytelling and art.

Watch on YouTube with closed captions here: https://youtu.be/TX7ZEz2DQTo

Read Laura's piece here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44514

Read Beth Anne's piece here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44511

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🎙️ In this episode of the Mad & Crip Theology Podcast, we sit down with Robbie Walker and Ty Ragan to dive into their work and the larger conversations happening in our community around disability justice and faith.

Robbie reflects on the tensions between Pentecostal theology and disability justice, exploring how healing can be about dignity and agency rather than spectacle. Ty challenges the myth of normalcy in faith communities, pushing for accessibility not just in physical spaces but in leadership, theology, and cultural attitudes. Together, we talk about what it means for churches to move beyond inclusion toward true disability justice. And of course, we couldn't resist bringing Star Trek into the conversation. 🚀🖖

Watch on YouTube with captions here: https://youtu.be/xbH3f5-2zxg

✨ Plus, exciting news: the Mad & Crip Theology Podcast was just named one of FeedSpot’s Best Five Canadian Disability Podcasts! 🎉 Check out the full list here: https://podcast.feedspot.com/canada_disability_podcasts/

📖 Read Robbie’s piece: Is the Beautiful Gate Accessible? here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44517
📖 Read Ty’s piece: What is Dignity? here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/44507

#MadAndCripTheologyPress #DisabilityJustice #FaithAndJustice #StarTrek #Podcast

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Today we talk with Becky Jones about her piece "Imago Dei Belongs in Community: A Classroom Project that Invites Disabled People to Reflect on Biblical Passages About Disability." 

You can view Becky's paintings here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/42978/32607

Watch on YouTube with closed captions here: https://youtu.be/zZb9rxK83Dw

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We are privileged to be joined today by Zoughbi Zoughbi who wrote "Trauma and Resistance: Wiam Centre in Palestine."  

Read his piece here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/42975

Abstract: There is no nation, community, or individuals without passing through conflict, suffering, stress or trauma. Suffering is very essential for our growth because it is the driving force for change via resistance and vitality. Our resistance is essential to change the situation … and no change without struggling, sacrificing and suffering. Change is not a mechanical or automatic process. It is a life story full of traumas, perseverance, struggle and resistance. As Palestinians, we have four kinds of traumas at least: first, the collective trauma of 1948 NAKBA (Catastrophe) in which 600 villages were levelled and more than 750 thousand people were kicked out from their villages in historic Palestine. Most of those people moved forcefully to live in refugee camps inside the land and in the diaspora. Currently, there are 59 refugee camps around the world, precisely in the Middle East. The population of the Palestinian people is now almost 14 million; half of them are refugees who dream of returning to their homes. Collective trauma is now as a result in what is happening in Gaza as genocide, famine, and all human rights violation unfold. The trauma has been more painful and severe in the light of international states' complicity. 

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On this episode we speak with Vicki Marie and Shauna Kubossek, two contributors to the Spring 2024 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health, and Disability on Trauma and Resistance.

About her poem, "To Know and To Grow," Vicki shares: I attended Catholic parochial school in the early 1950’s and was the only African American there for six years.  It took me years to dispel the idea that only white people were holy; that only white people were saints.  This wasn’t taught overtly but the messages I received were clear.  This work is about my struggle to believe that God loves me and an invitation for you to love those in your life that are considered outsiders.  Find the full text here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/42980

About her article, "“I Am Weary with Holding it In”: Fight, Flight and Freeze in Jeremiah’s Final Confession," Shauna shares: Over the years I have experienced the tendency of some Christian communities to ignore (at best) and demonize (at worst) those who experience dark nights of the soul. Rather than being embraced, these Dear Ones are told that they must have more faith, that their suffering is God’s will, or (heaven forbid) that they have brought this pain on themselves. I have also seen the church’s deep engagement in the lives of those experiencing trauma. I have heard preachers contend with the difficult parts of Christian scriptures and have seen Christians battle with how to live well while looking the suffering of the world directly in the eyes. This article is an attempt to participate in the latter efforts, to engage theology with and for those experiencing trauma, and to intentionally engage my own pain and the pain of others not only with generosity, humility and kindness, but with deep reflection on the sacred texts of my beloved tradition. I hope that this article contributes to a positive articulation of Christian theology which engages pain rather than overlooks it, one that takes experience and practice seriously, and rejects tradition when engagement with those who suffer requires it. Find the full text here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/42976

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On this episode of the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast we talk with Rev. Dr. Sarah Travis about her Invited Commentary "Of Ghost Stories and Field Hospitals: Worship Leadership Amid Trauma." 

Read Sarah's commentary here: 
https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/42973

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We are back after a brief hiatus! This episode features a conversation with Konnie Vissers and Wendy Cabell, two contributors to the Spring (2024) issue of The Canadian Journal of Mental Health, Disability, and Theology: Trauma and Resistance.

Find Konnie's piece "Sexual Abuse Trauma, Mental Health, and Theology: Why Theology in Practice Matters to Survivors" here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/42977

Find Wendy's piece "So How Are You Today?" here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/42985

To watch on YouTube with closed captions, visit: https://youtu.be/uFirLQStqCw

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Join Amy and Miriam as they talk with Allen Jorgenson and Laura MacGregor about their recent book: "Beyond Saints and Superheroes: Supporting Parents Raising Children with Disabilities - A Practical Guide for Faith Communities." Proudly published by The Mad and Crip Theology Press (Amy Panton, Founder/Publisher).

Available with captions on YouTube:  https://youtu.be/4-uwXfrG7wU

The authors are available to speak with your faith community about this project. Get in touch with author Laura MacGregor by emailing Amy at the Press at amy@madandcriptheologypress.ca. Contact author Allen Jorgenson at his email at Martin Luther University College at ajorgenson@wlu.ca

New! Purchase the e-book version here. In Beyond Saints and Superheroes: Supporting Parents Raising Children with Disabilities A Practical Guide for Faith Communities Laura MacGregor and Allen G. Jorgenson tell the stories of parents who have brought their children with disabilities to church. Some parents have felt supported by their faith communities, while many have felt unwelcome, silenced, and have even left their churches altogether. This eight-week guide is written for personal self-reflection and small-group learning. The guide highlights practical ways that faith communities can support families impacted by disability. Beautiful illustrations by Wendy Newbery and poetry by Allen G. Jorgenson, along with spiritual practices, provide points of reflection as you journey through the eight-week guide. ​The Beyond Saints and Superheroes Research Project was made possible by a Project Research Grant from the Louisville Institute.

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This month we talk with Anonymous about their piece, "On Care and Control." Read the full piece: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/40814

We talk about interdependency, care as control, care as mutual, and the desire to be mediocre and celebrate mediocracy!  Have a listen/watch!

Check out 10 Principles of Disability Justice by Sins Invalid: https://static1.squarespace.com/static/5bed3674f8370ad8c02efd9a/t/5f1f0783916d8a179c46126d/1595869064521/10_Principles_of_DJ-2ndEd.pdf

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Join Amy and Miriam in their conversation with Anita Belliveau and Conni Cartlidge as they reflect on caring for their parents and all the emotions/relationship dynamics of that time of life.

We encourage you to read, reflect on, and discuss both of their pieces in the Spring 2023 issue:  https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd

Let us know what conversations / ideas this episode stirs up for you!

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Join us for an episode featuring Emily Duggan and Keith Reynolds, clergy in The United Church of Canada.  They reflect with Amy and Miriam on experiences of caregiving and care-receiving: Emily with her daughter and Keith with a member of Avondale United in Stratford. Watch on Youtube with subtitles here: https://youtu.be/t-aKY4Kacyo

We encourage you to read, reflect on, and discuss both of their pieces in the Spring 2023 issue:  https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd

Let us know what conversations / ideas this episode stirs up for you!

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On this episode, we speak with Susan Fish, Laszlo and Elly Sarkany about their experiences with caregiving for their parents.  Their pieces and our conversation weaves together stories filled with grief, joy, connection and love.  We encourage you to read their stories and listen to their reflections.

Susan's piece on reading Watership Down to her father is here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/40826

Laszlo and Elly write about caregiving for Laszlo's mom with brain cancer here:
https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/40830

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On this episode we talk with Heather Morgan and Dorothy Palmer about disability justice, creating a WhatsApp group to support parents raising children with disabilities, politics related to disability and how it feels to be a Canadian senior who lives with disabilities both now and during the pandemic.

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Amy & Miriam speak with Erin Raffety, author of "From Inclusion to Justice: Disability, Ministry, and Congregational Leadership." She is joined by her daughter, Lucia.

To purchase the book, visit https://www.baylorpress.com/9781481316941/from-inclusion-to-justice/

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On this episode, Amy and Miriam speak with Elena Goldak on her article: They Shall Surely Be Put to Death: A Critical Disability Reading of Queer Conversion Violence.  

Elena writes,
"This essay is an inquiry into the relationship between queer conversion violence (QCV) and forms of suicidal violence. I am particularly interested in the ways that queer people come to participate in projects of debility which target queer people. I term this violence community suicide. Drawing from Jasbir Puar’s notion of debility, I critique the Christian fundamentalist “ex-gay” movement depicted in the Netflix documentary Pray Away to articulate the concept of community suicide. Following this, I use Alexandre Baril’s theory of suicidism to understand the ways that Christian fundamentalist discourses on queerness and suicide are related — a relation which creates conditions for community suicide. I argue that contemporary Christian QCV relies on a specific religious queerphobia that likens queer life to suicidal death, and by design, further reproduces suicide as part of a project in debility."

Read the full article here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/39545

Watch with captions on YouTube: https://youtu.be/u_DVXSmsU94 

As well, here are some queer-affirming Christian spaces/communities
Affirm United (affiliated with The United Church of Canada) https://affirmunited.ause.ca
Student Christian Movement Canada https://scmcanada.org
The Presbyterian Church of Canada https://presbyterian.ca/justice/social-action/gender-sexuality-inclusion/
The Anglican Church of Canada https://www.anglican.ca/faith/focus/hs/

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On this episode, Amy and Miriam speak with Daryna Skybina about her paper published in the Fall 2022 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health, and Disability: A Trauma-Informed Approach to Discussing Karma in Buddhism. You can find more about Daryna's psychotherapy practice at www.darynaskybina.com or via Instagram @darynaskybinapsychotherapy Read the full paper here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/39547

For closed captions, watch the episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/dp3lLsFWQTQ

Here's an abstract: In recent years there has been a rise of individuals from Western cultures turning to Eastern spiritual traditions, including Buddhism, for mental health support. Given the prevalence of trauma, it would be helpful for these communities to discuss spiritual teachings in a trauma-informed manner. Some teachings, including the teaching of karma, have at times been taught through a lens that stigmatizes trauma survivors. Karma is a complex topic, yet a crucial element of Buddhist ethics and morality. This paper is a preliminary theoretical exploration of how the teaching of karma in Buddhism can be examined in a manner that considers the complexity of trauma. It also discusses how a care provider can turn to the Buddhist teaching of skillful compassion to help them better practice trauma-informed care.

Some resources Daryna recommends:
Love and Rage: The Path of Liberation Through Anger by Lama Rod Owens https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/608716/love-and-rage-by-lama-rod-owens/
When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner https://www.penguinrandomhouse.ca/books/96404/when-bad-things-happen-to-good-people-by-harold-s-kushner/9781400034727

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In this episode, we talk with Heather Morgan about purity culture and the harm being done to female-presenting autistic people (and others) because of this movement. Heather shares some of her diaries from growing up and talks about the teachings she learned about purity when she was young. She then explains how she feels receiving an autism diagnosis would have helped her make better sense of purity culture. We then talk about helpful ways of talking about sex, faith, and autism. 

Read Heather's commentary piece "Autism and Purity Culture" in the journal here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/39544 

Here is a list of some further reading mentioned in the episode:

-Nadia Bolz-Weber, Shameless: A Sexual Reformation, (New York: Convergent Books, 2019).
-Devon Price, Unmasking Autism: Discovering the New Faces of Neurodiversity, (New York: Harmony Books, 2022).
-Danielle Mayfield, God is My Special Interest, (Blog and Cultivated Community), https://dlmayfield.substack.com/
-Heather Renée Morgan, Powered by Love, www.poweredbylove.ca
-Jesus Girls: True Tales of Growing Up Female and Evangelical, Hannah Faith Nottess Ed. (Eugene, OR, Cascade: 2009).

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In this episode, we talk with Shauna Kubossek about her newly published paper "'So That She May Be Made Well' Themes of Salvation, Trust, and Healing in Mark 5:21–43."  We discuss atonement theories, healing and cure, voice hearing, and how we can have better theologies around those in our faith communities who are "not liberated, whose bleeding has not stopped, and whose bodies are not resurrected."

There are also a lot of recommended resources in this episode for feminist and womanist trauma theologies and voice hearing (here are a few!).
-Bearing Witness: Intersectional Perspectives on Trauma Theology Ed. by O'Donnell and Cross 
-Christians Hearing Voices: Affirming Experience and Finding Meaning by Christopher Cook


Read Shauna's paper here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/39548 

Watch on YouTube with captions here: 

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On this episode of the podcast we talk with Dr. Naomi Lawson-Jacobs about their creative piece "A Story Like Mine" from the Fall issue of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability which focuses on Mad and Crip Sexuality. Naomi shares their experience of growing up in churches where they heard no stories of queer, disabled people and how disabled people’s sexuality is silenced, especially queer disabled sexuality. They also talk about the disabled Christ himself, who queers and crips the Resurrection.

Read their piece here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/article/view/39551 

Watch on YouTube with captions here: 

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In this episode, we explore ideas about how to make pedagogy more inclusive for mad and crip people. We also share some of our own experiences with non-inclusive pedagogies and discuss some fixes. With Eliana Ah Rum Ku, Shauna Kubossek and Laura MacGregor. 

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Today's roundtable talk is about pain (physical, emotional, spiritual) in our lives. Content warning: this one is raw and hits very close to the chest for us. There were a lot of tears as we talked. Watch on YouTube with captions here: 

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On this episode of the podcast we chat about the theologies we wish we would have known about when we were growing up. 

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On this episode of the podcast we have a roundtable talk on what disability and/or mental health theologies make us angry and offer some antidotes. Watch on YouTube with closed captions here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEa2P7cCVXE 

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In this episode, we talk with two of our contributors to the Spring issue of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health, and Disability about their pieces that focus on women, depression, and faith.   

Eliana talks about her lived experience of postpartum depression and how she navigated this journey while being a part of the Christian Korean and Canadian-Korean faith communities and how lament became a part of how she processed her experience.

Amira talks with us about her work on the "Heroine's Journey" and how women from the Muslim faith tradition who have lived experience of depression can co-create with others in their faith communities to find joy and healing.

Read their pieces here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd

Watch on Youtube with closed captions here: https://youtu.be/1TbCnFsKchI

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On this episode we talk with Beth Anne Fisher and Steve Bedard about their contributions to the Spring issue of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. 

Beth Anne reflects on her lived experience of taking anti-depressants and the connection between her diagnosis of PTSD and her Christian faith.

Steve discusses his lived experience of autism, parenting his children who are on the autism spectrum, and his work as a pastor.

Read their pieces here https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd 

Watch with closed captions  on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/3tIV7aa5Fy4

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On this episode we talk with Charles Meeks and Carmen Llanos about their contributions to the Spring issue of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability.

Charles' creative piece reflects theologically upon his lived experience of depression and taking the anti-depressant Wellbutrin. Carmen's paper presents an outline of a program called "Swearing Circles" which is based on the model of listening circles, (but instead of listening, you swear!).

Watch the podcast on Youtube with closed captions here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r19qibBYFUk

You can read their pieces here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/issue/view/230

 

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We're flipping the tables today. Laura MacGregor interviews Amy and Miriam about their work!

Amy talks about her research on self-injury, and Miriam talks about her research on faith leaders with disabilities in the church. 

Watch on Youtube with captions here: 

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On this episode, Amy and Miriam speak with two of our visual artists from the Fall 2021 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability: Iris Gildea and Sharoni Sibony.

The Colours of Forgiveness: Visual Art, Spirituality, Trauma & Mental Health by Iris:
These images were painted as a means of exploring, communicating, coming to terms with, re-imagining and accepting childhood trauma. While recovery from childhood trauma is a difficult and emotionally challenging journey, I have found it is also a journey that is unparalleled in the depths of spirituality that healing and creative expression have manifested for me. My creative practice, like my spirituality, is influenced by a deep reception to interfaith wisdom traditions that guide me toward experiencing and representing what is always an ineffable contact between the human and the divine. I believe strongly that those of us who journey through the more intense spectrums of trauma and the mental health responses that inevitably mark such journeys are also able to access invaluable insights. These are insights to rich experiences of spiritual and human reality that normative culture fails to recognize and/or integrate as an essential part of the human experience.

Living in these margins of spirituality and mental health encounters can be isolating. In my experience, cultural approaches to trauma recovery tend to fail survivors. Yet, art as a means of self-exploration and creative transformation is able to support us as, in my case of surviving childhood sexual abuse, we reclaim the parts of ourselves the cultural norms teach us to silence and repress. That spirituality and art intersect in the on-going recovery from childhood trauma is a beautiful reality to me that I seek to explore creatively. These images are a witnessing to and manifesting of that exploratory process.

My Body's Keeper: Provocations and Possibilities by Sharoni:
I initially made these images for an exhibition in the Virtual Gallery of the Miles Nadal Jewish Community Centre in downtown Toronto, February 2021, and am so grateful for the opportunity to reach a different audience and embark on a broader conversation through this journal. I welcome correspondence with folks in different religious communities about how you’re navigating similar questions about chronic or episodic illness. Disclosure of invisible long-term illness or disability is a fraught and frightening experience but I hope that sharing these personal reflections will only lead to an ever-increasing understanding of our whole selves in our collective spiritual communities.

Both pieces can be viewed here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/issue/view/2302 

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On this episode Amy and Miriam speak with two of our poets from the Fall 2021 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability.

Chantal Huinink reflects on her poem: As a Canadian woman with disabilities, I am deeply encouraged by the prophet Isaiah’s theology of access and promotion of universal design. This poem is meant to alert readers to similarities and differences between hardships that people with and without disabilities experienced before, during and likely beyond the pandemic. The opportunities I have to bear witness to the ways in which God has redeemed, is redeeming and will redeem tragedy, invigorates my Christian faith. When the pain and suffering caused by the pandemic is not so raw, may we be mindful of ways to continue advancing on the Road to a barrier free society, propelled by the wisdom that we carry forward into the new “normal.”

Mike Walker reflects on his poem: I’ve often found that people stare at me on the street. That was particularly true in Toronto when I lived there between 2006 and 2018. They probably glanced – or outright stared – at me because they found my gait unconventional. Maybe it made them uncomfortable. In any case, I’ve often wondered why people stared, and whether I could ask them to stop… Thus, this free-verse poem shows me, on the street, and on the chin-up bar, communicating part of my reaction to people’s prejudice. The weight room and the chin-up bar don’t judge me, but I have often found that people do, even if they don’t mean to. I want their judgment to become acceptance, and sometimes – as this poem indicates – that acceptance is hard-won. That acceptance comes from me – from within – not from without.

 To read the poems, visit: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/issue/view/2302

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On this episode, Amy and Miriam speak with three of our contributors from our Fall 2021 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability: Susan Smadych, Tori Mullin, and Larry Schneider.  To read these pieces, go to https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/issue/view/2302

Susan: A Psychological Exegesis of Job through Conceptualizations of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Moral Injury. This paper proposes that the results of a psychological exegesis of Job through a lens of current conceptualizations of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and moral injury (MI), and based on evidence of his behaviour, may be leveraged to: 1) enhance the scholarly understanding of the impact of trauma on Job; 2) inform pastoral care of people who live with the same psychological condition(s) as Job; and 3) contribute to discourse on the relevance, applicability and limitations of psychological exegesis. This paper will overview the historical and recent utilization of psychological exegesis, including its anticipated benefits and relevance, and how concerns about its methodology have been mitigated by modern scholars; provide conceptual definitions of PTSD and MI, as the ‘lens’ through which to conduct a psychological exegesis of Job; briefly describe an existing psychological exegetical framework, and how it was leveraged; and summarize psychological exegetical findings of Job and their implications.

Tori: A Wish (poem). As someone with depression who grew up in an Evangelical Christian community I have struggled to accept how my brain was created. Today I am able to say that I am a sensitive human being that processes her experiences in a way that is different from others. But, for so long, I labelled my “mental health struggles” as a lack of faith, as human weakness. As I grew from a teenager into an adult I found it easier to accept my sexuality and gender than my physical or mental impairments. My body was a source of deeper pain and hurt than my sexuality or gender identity could ever be. Perhaps this is because, even in "progressive" Christian communities, we still struggle with a stigma around mental health. It has been through learning about my deceased mother’s history with mental health that I’ve found a way to begin accepting this part of myself. However, this has also brought a new edge to my grief as I mourn the knowledge and compassion she would have been able to offer me from her own lived experience. My mother and I were incredibly similar, and more than anything I wish I could tell her about my pain, my struggles, about what has worked and what has not. Some part of myself believes in her story I might have found the secret to my own.

Larry: Musings on a Turbulent Time (a poem). A poetic exploration of the extreme emotions and situations that people are finding themsevles experiecing during the pandemic, highlighting personal and spiritual challenges being faced, and that which we seek from God and from within our own beings in order to survive and thrive

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On this episode we speak with Laura MacGregor and Janet Hardy, two authors from the Fall 2021 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability.

Laura's paper: A Present Absence: The Spiritual Paradox of Parenting a Medically Complex Child, Parenting a medically complex child is associated with physical, emotional, financial, and spiritual stressors. Despite research indicating that faith and spirituality can be a powerful coping mechanism, the spiritual experiences of parents caring for complex children is not well researched. Drawing on personal experience as the parent of a medically complex child, this phenomenological study explored the spiritual experiences of nine parents. Parents described spiritual confusion and a perceived absence of God that was exacerbated by theodicies offered by members of their faith community. Rather than theodicies that rationalized God amid suffering, the participants of this study described yearning for an elusive God amid the constant paradoxical tension of a frustrated faith where the Divine was a present absence.

Janet's paper: Hope As Community: Spiritual Care for Families with Members Who Have Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) In our present culture, many people feel that life in the shadow of death with its pain and suffering is no life at all. Yet we all approach that shadow eventually and then, people who were previously healthy learn to appreciate the many good things in life that they’re still able to have. The prospect of death, our own or that of a loved one, brings the blur of life into sharp and brilliant focus. In that respect the dying and their families may be more alive and awake to the truths that emerge at the end of things and more aware of the elements of life that lend existence its meaning. Sorrow can move us to participate in moral obligation to a full encounter with life or shut us down with a hardened heart. How we live in death’s wake is a deeply personal consideration. When confronted by a terminal illness with a timeline that provides for contemplation, adjustment and a runway to influence quality of life, there are opportunities for a patient, their family or community surrounding that family to determine how best to positively influence the end of life experience. Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) is such a disease. 

Read full papers here
https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/issue/view/2302

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On today's episode, we talk with artist Anastasia Watson and psychotherapist Micheal Sersch. 

Anastasia has lived experience of epilepsy and she talks with us about her photographic piece entitled "Liminal Living" which was published in the new issue of the journal. About her photographs she explains: "Through the gift of symbolic language and, later, the visual narratives of film and photography, I have been able to point toward the liminal landscapes of health, hope, and ability. The images explore my experience of access and ability within academia. Within each image, I am using my physical form to embody sensations and struggles occurring within me and amplified by the cultural structures around me."

We also chat with psychotherapist Michael Sersch about his thoughts on the US capital attack one year after the event and discuss how we can love the "other." In Michael's article "Demonization and Our Discontent: The Challenge of Loving the Other in the Time of COVID" he explains "I distinctly remember the moment on January 6, 2021 when the US capital was attacked. Previously, I had found myself breathing a little easier since the previous election. I was finding that I was not on the same state of dread and fear, no longer constantly refreshing online news sites. My eye flutter had improved. Patients were no longer coming in and sharing how their own anxiety seemed to be spiraling out of control with the increasingly erratic behavior at the national stage. And then the attack occurred. I struggled to understand what was happening and what was motivating those involved."

To read/view their pieces, see the journal here: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/issue/view/2302

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On our tenth episode of The Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, Amy and Miriam speak with Heather Morgan and Erin Raffety, two contributors to the Fall 2021 issue of The Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. 

Heather's article: Disability and Gregory of Nazianzus’s Oration 14: No Body Without Our Bodies offers a reading of Gregory of Nazianzus’ Oration 14: On Love of the Poor through the lens of disability theology. Though it initially served as a fundraising speech to build one of the first ever Christian hospitals, this Oration is much more than that. Amongst his plea for donors, Nazianzus calls for a new theological understanding of those with abled and disabled bodies within the life of the Church. Interleafing modern disability experiences with this early Christian text, this paper invites readers to embrace a counter-cultural model of disability and ability, and our mutually interdependent membership in the Body of Christ.

Erin's article: Listening Even Unto Rebuke. In 2020, amidst the Covid-19 pandemic and racialized violence by the police against Black citizens in the United States, a white college classmate of mine publicly apologized to a Black classmate for failing to acknowledge racism that happened nearly twenty years ago while we were students. Our Black classmate responded that it was too little too late. That incident caused me to begin to think about the witness of holy rebuke that often looks like mere condemnation but also acts as relational bid, humanizing the oppressor by calling them to accountability. As I revisited my research on disabled ministers and leaders, I started to see how the unruliness of lament in church spaces was often unable to be heard by the church, because it smacked of rebuke. However, I am convinced this is the Spirit’s wisdom and grace in translating lament: it offers oppressed peoples the opportunity to press prophetically in on oppressors and oppressors the invitation to repent as they grapple with being complicit in oppression. Of course, churches want to include disabled people when it is easy to do so. But to listen unto rebuke is vital if the Church really wants to be transformed.

All articles are available here https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/issue/view/2302

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On today's episode Miriam and Amy are joined by Robbie Walker and Laura MacGregor (and Amy's cat Oliver!). We discuss "Scriptures that Shape Us" and talk about ways that Christian scripture has been both a gift and a challenge for us as people with disabilities, people with lived experience of mental distress, and as caregivers. 

Here are a few of the resources we mention during the podcast: 
1) Carework: Dreaming Disability Justice by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
2) Psychological Insights in the Bible: Texts and Readings Ed Wayne Rollins and Andrew Kille 

If you would like closed captions, please see our YouTube page: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ 

If you would like a transcript of the podcast, it is included with the podcast on our buzzsprout page: https://themadandcriptheologypodcast.buzzsprout.com/ 

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Welcome to the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, hosted by Miriam Spies and Amy Panton, which comes out of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. We both live and work lands that have been homes and remain homes to the Mississaugas of the Credit, the Haudenosaunee, the Huron Wendat, the Neutral and the Ojibway/Chippewa peoples and other peoples who have cared for the land. We are grateful for the opportunity to live and work on this land and are mindful of the need to repair broken covenants.

On this episode Amy Panton and Miriam Spies are joined by Robbie Walker and Laura MacGregor to tell reflect on words that have shaped and continue to shape our crip and mad theologies. Together we explore our hope, passion, and "crunchy" theology where we sit with ambiguity and discomfort. We also briefly dip into theologies of healing. We would love to hear what this conversation sparks in you, what resonates with your experience, and what questions are lingering for you.

This podcast is an opportunity to model how faith communities can engage in theological and spiritual conversations around madness and cripness.

To see a video of this podcast along with subtitles visit https://youtu.be/xNzRo-VM-YM 

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On this episode Amy Panton and Miriam Spies are joined by Robbie Walker and Laura MacGregor to tell some of our stories - and how we identify as "reluctant theologians."  Part of our need / our hope for this work is to be supported by and in community. Together we explore our anger, grief, and hopes for ourselves, our communities, and our churches.  We would love to hear what this conversation sparks in you, what resonates with your experience, and what questions are lingering for you.

To watch the episode on YouTube, with subtitles on the screen, go here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7Wu1_Bvmcc&t=1631s 

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Welcome to the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, hosted by Miriam Spies and Amy Panton, which comes out of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. We both live and work lands that have been homes and remain homes to the Mississaugas of the Credit, the Haudenosaunee, the Huron Wendat, the Neutral and the Ojibway/Chippewa peoples and other peoples who have cared for the land. We are grateful for the opportunity to live and work on this land and are mindful of the need to repair broken covenants.

On today’s episode of the Mad and Crip Theology podcast we talk to Krysia Waldock and Dr. Mike Walker. Krysia's creative piece "Doing Church During Covid-19: An Autistic Reflection on Online Church" illuminates an Autistic perspective on faith and church attendance during the Covid-19 pandemic. Autistic people may be stereotyped as less likely to be religious or have a belief system, yet they can have a belief system much in the same manner as a non-autistic person. It is also emerging that Autistic people are also disadvantaged in the current climate of a global pandemic. We discuss  Krysia's piece and also her work in the mad/crip communities more broadly.

Mike's poem "Love/Hate" describes his relationship to his body, rather fully…he loves his body because it is strong, slender, and sinewy. That said, he also experiences spastic cerebral palsy, scoliosis, and all that those conditions entail. Thus, often he hates his body, because he will walk into walls, nearly fall while moving towards a goal, lose his grip on an object. We discuss Bonhoeffer's assertion that the suffering God can help; that said, Mike sometimes wonders whether God sees his pains, and whether S/He really wants to alleviate them. We also talk about other work that Mike is doing in Ottawa.

This podcast is an opportunity to model how faith communities can engage in theological and spiritual conversations around madness and cripness. If you need a full transcript you can find videos on our Youtube channel and here is the link:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ 

We want to say that topics and conversations we are raising throughout our time together are often hard!  They are hard for mad and crip people ourselves and hard for our families and loved ones. So, do what you need to do to take care of yourselves, your bodies, minds, and hearts.

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Welcome to the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, hosted by Miriam Spies and Amy Panton, which comes out of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. We both live and work lands that have been homes and remain homes to the Mississaugas of the Credit, the Haudenosaunee, the Huron Wendat, the Neutral and the Ojibway/Chippewa peoples and other peoples who have cared for the land. We are grateful for the opportunity to live and work on this land and are mindful of the need to repair broken covenants.

On today’s episode of the Mad and Crip Theology podcast we talk to Rev Matthew Arguin and psychotherapist Michael Serch who both wrote creative pieces for our first issue of the journal. Matthew's poem "A Prayer in Time of Pandemic" was written in October of 2020, reflecting on Exodus 33:15, as Moses pleads with YHWH to go before the people of Israel as they make their way to the promised land.  The COVID-19 pandemic means that many of us are in the midst of a new and unknown reality.  What does that mean for our mental health? In particular, what does it mean for those who find themselves leading faith communities?

Michael's reflective piece "Mad to Be Normal: Thoughts on Psychiatrist R.D Laing and Connections to Liberation Theology" uses the film Mad to be Normal, about R.D. Laing, as an opening into the liberation psychology approaches of Martin-Baro. Examples from Michael's clinical practice as well as personal experiences from life in a Catholic Worker community are  included.

This podcast is an opportunity to model how faith communities can engage in theological and spiritual conversations around madness and cripness. If you need a full transcript you can find videos on our Youtube channel and here is the link:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ 

We want to say that topics and conversations we are raising throughout our time together are often hard!  They are hard for mad and crip people ourselves and hard for our families and loved ones. So, do what you need to do to take care of yourselves, your bodies, minds, and hearts.

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*Content warning: suicide, grief, death of a child.

Welcome to the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, hosted by Miriam Spies and Amy Panton, which comes out of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. We both live and work lands that have been homes and remain homes to the Mississaugas of the Credit, the Haudenosaunee, the Huron Wendat, the Neutral and the Ojibway/Chippewa peoples and other peoples who have cared for the land. We are grateful for the opportunity to live and work on this land and are mindful of the need to repair broken covenants. 

On today’s episode of the Mad and Crip Theology podcast we talk to Dr. Laura Macgregor and Alex Jebson. Laura's piece in our most recent issue of the journal considers how the intellectualization of worship in many mainstream churches denies embodiment as a source of spiritual wisdom, and as a result, excludes the meaningful participation and leadership of people with intellectual disabilities. Drawing on personal experience as the mother of a child with profound intellectual disabilities, Laura explore how an intellectual lens of faith, as demonstrated by theologians such as Henri Nouwen and Hans Reinders, has colonized the embodied spiritual lives of people with intellectual disabilities.  

Alex's piece in the same issue of the journal wrestles with the topic of student suicides from the perspective of the student body at the University of Toronto, and examples of secular and Christian examinations of the suffering and potential avenues of hope are offered. Suffering for the student body is the result of external trauma, compounded by the disruption of a cultural narrative for young students, a lack of institutional acknowledgement, and little spiritual resources to draw from, risking further isolation and feelings of helplessness. Hope can be found in discerning justice for the deceased, restoring a sense of agency to the student body through activism and institutional reform. 
To check out their written work, head to our journal website: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/index 

This podcast is an opportunity to model how faith communities can engage in theological and spiritual conversations around madness and cripness. If you need a full transcript you can find videos on our Youtube channel and here is the link:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ 

We want to say that topics and conversations we are raising throughout our time together are often hard!  They are hard for mad and crip people ourselves and hard for our families and loved ones. So, do what you need to do to take care of yourselves, your bodies, minds, and hearts.

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On today’s episode of the Mad and Crip Theology podcast we talk to Jasper Jay Bryan and Jasmine Duckworth. We discuss their writings in the first issue of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability, as well as their work in theology and the disability community more broadly. Jasper's piece in the first issue is an article called "Enchanted Suffering: Queer Magick as Educated Hope" which asks the question: how can an enchanted worldview assist care providers in expanding horizons of hope for their clients, patients, congregations, or communities?  In Jasmine's piece, she reflects on her personal experience of finding belonging in the margins, as well as John Swinton's teaching on how by sitting with people marginalized by society, Jesus consequently moved those margins. To check out their written work, head to our journal website: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/index 

This podcast is an opportunity to model how faith communities can engage in theological and spiritual conversations around madness and cripness. If you need a full transcript you  can find videos on our Youtube channel and here is the link:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ 

We want to say that topics and conversations we are raising throughout our time together are often hard!  They are hard for mad and crip people ourselves and hard for our families and loved ones. So, do what you need to do to take care of yourselves, your bodies, minds, and hearts. 

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Welcome to the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, hosted by Miriam Spies and Amy Panton, which comes out of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. On today’s episode of the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast we talk to Alisha Krisna who is on the Board of Directors of Students for Barrier-Free Access (SBA), a non-profit University of Toronto student levy organization that represents mad and disabled students. Alisha was kind enough to sit down with us to discuss the University of Toronto's Mandated Leave of Absence Policy (UMLAP), which is a forced leave of absence for students experiencing mental distress. The Policy stigmatizes mad students and, according to the Ontario Human Rights Commission, "falls short on its duty to accommodate students with mental health disabilities and addictions." We stand in solidarity with SBA as they work to resist UMLAP. You can read more about SBA's position on UMLAP here: https://uoftsba.wordpress.com/campaigns-adovcacy/umlap/

If you would like captions, you can watch the podcast on our Youtube page at this link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ

This podcast is an opportunity to model how faith communities can engage in theological and spiritual conversations around madness and cripness. If you need a full transcript you can find videos on our Youtube channel and here is the link:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ 

We want to say that topics and conversations we are raising throughout our time together are often hard!  They are hard for mad and crip people ourselves and hard for our families and loved ones. So, do what you need to do to take care of yourselves, your bodies, minds, and hearts.

• Follow us on Facebook
• Read the Journal
• Check out Mad and Crip Theology Press

Welcome to the Mad and Crip Theology Podcast, hosted by Miriam Spies and Amy Panton, which comes out of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability. We both live and work lands that have been homes and remain homes to the Mississaugas of the Credit, the Haudenosaunee, the Huron Wendat, the Neutral and the Ojibway/Chippewa peoples and other peoples who have cared for the land. We are grateful for the opportunity to live and work on this land and are mindful of the need to repair broken covenants. 

On today’s episode of the Mad and Crip Theology podcast we talk to Professor HyeRan Kim-Cragg, PhD student Elizabeth Mohler and Rev. Alexa Gilmour. We discuss their writings in the first issue of the Canadian Journal of Theology, Mental Health and Disability, as well as their work in theology and the disability community more broadly. HyeRan’s piece in the first issue is a sermon on mental health and racism entitled “Stings Like a Sunburn: A Sermon for Emmanuel College During the Covid-19 Pandemic” which reflects upon racism in Canadian society and the mistreatment of migrant workers within Canada during the pandemic. Elizabeth and Alexa’s piece “Coronavirus and the Ability to Love Your Neighbour” tells the story of Neighbours Helping Neighbours at Windermere United Church in Toronto. To check out their written work, head to our journal website: https://jps.library.utoronto.ca/index.php/cjtmhd/index 

This podcast is an opportunity to model how faith communities can engage in theological and spiritual conversations around madness and cripness. If you need a full transcript you can find videos on our Youtube channel and here is the link:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRUW9z5hoqP_WK74hg3N8bQ 

We want to say that topics and conversations we are raising throughout our time together are often hard!  They are hard for mad and crip people ourselves and hard for our families and loved ones. So, do what you need to do to take care of yourselves, your bodies, minds, and hearts. 

The quote used in the episode came from: Reaume, A.H. “Why My Novel Is Dedicated To My Disabled Friend Maddy.” In Disability Visibility: First-Person Stories from the Twenty-First Century, edited by Alice Wong, 149–158. New York, NY: Vintage, 2020, 153.

The music played in the beginning: "Island Beat" by Arulo. Downloaded from https://mixkit.co/free-stock-music/

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