This week it's time to talk more filler as the show meanders around trying to find something to say! Peter's dad was kind of fun though.

We drank: Sapporo Lager

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

The fillery-est filler episode yet. We did our best with this lukewarm jumble of conversations that go nowhere. Martin's aunt has some wild business ideas though.

We drank: the source of all life on this planet.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

7th Heaven does it's best E.R. impression. Various main cast members call Matt on the phone so they can get their mandated screen time. Special guest David visits again!

Greg and David Drank:

Nurnberger - Tucher Lager Helles Brauspezialitat

Boulevard Brewing Co. - Unfiltered Wheat

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week 7th Heaven returns to form with a classic PSA-style episode. More importantly, friend of the show David makes his triumphant return!

We Drank:

Oliver Brewing Co. - Cherry Blossom 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Lucy weasels her way into a Police department softball team where she is not wanted, bad communication abounds between Paris and Chandler, Ashlee Simpson continues to be around, and Peter is the new Simon as he blindly starts delivering kites for drug addicts.

Greg Drank:

Union Craft Brewing - Skipjack Pilsner

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

It's another Islamophobia PSA episode, but the twist is Glen Oak also hates France. Plus Chandler and Peter's mom have whirlwind romance on the promenade and Mrs. Bink meets her match.

Greg Drank:

Fat Orange Cat - Winter Warmer

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Eric gives everyone an assignment to be more charitable, and few are capable of it, but Lucy finally gets back to her true passion: Habitat for Humanity!

We drank:

Six Point x Mike's Hot Honey: Slice Sipper

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Basically they threw a 2003 style powerpoint at us and called it an episode. Impossible to watch, still fun to talk about.

Greg drank:

Victory Vienna Vacay

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week, a random WB hunk walks into the Camden house and acts like he knows everyone, then concludes the episode with a PSA on appreciating veterans. Also, we find out he knows the chimp Eisenhower.

Greg Drank:

Coors Banquet and

Elder Pine Pilsner

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show we discuss one of the most amazing sting operations ever written for television! We also learn a lot about the consequences of anti-depressants and Peter tries out drag make-up.

Greg Drank:

Orange Gatorade

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we discuss part 2 of the season 8 premiere. It's more hijinks related to Mary's secret husband (and pregnancy), more Simon angst, and more Chandler angst. Well, it was an episode.

Greg drank:

Lucky Buddha Beer

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We're back for Season 8! It's all drama on the beach as Simon and the family cope with the fact that he literally killed a man. Plus, pregnancy talk continues and the most random side character makes a second appearance.

Greg Drank: 

A delicious red Gatorade.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Season 7 finally ends with Tara Lipinski outted as a prostitute and Lucy probably pregnant. The family plans to celebrate Ruthie's first period with a dinner at the pool hall. That's pretty much all that happened, see you next season.

Greg Drank:

Coors Banquet

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We start the two-part season finale with a bizarre one starring the oft-forgotten early 2000s cameo queen Tara Lipinski. Peter continues to be a great guy, Sarah (and Lucy) might be pregnant, and Chandler's father attempts to fake his own death.

We drank:

Schöfferhofer Grapefruit Hefeweisen 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We prepare for the season finale with an episode about evil step-dads, lying parents, and getting engaged to seven men for presents.

This week we drank!:

2% Milk

Water

Classics.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show we discuss a riveting episode about roof repair fundraising.

Greg drank a fruit punch Gatorade.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week: Lucy finally gets married, it goes as you might expect, however there is a side plot that involves four characters wrestling at a Nevada gas station.

Greg Drank:

DC Brau - Brau Pils

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we discuss a bizarre late season episode where Roxanne's dad kills a man in cold blood, Ashlee Simpson breaks up with Simon for 10 minutes, Morgan and Patricia gaslight the Camdens, and Ben still won't leave.

Greg Drank: Silver Branch Glass Castle Pilsner

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show, Annie becomes the overbearing wedding planner, Roxanne's detective dad doesn't get under Chandler's skin, Ashlee Simpson actually likes Simon more than a beloved family friend, and Ben (he's still on the show?) loses his trained fire rescue dog and tries to cover it up.

Greg drank the "Stand Up" cocktail, which is 6 different combinations of mix drink designed by ChatGPT. Listen for details.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show it's Valentine's Day. Lucy's "plot" sort of peaks, but barely anything else of note happens. Ben still won't leave.

Greg Drank:

Corralejo Tequila with Q Mixers Premium Ginger Ale

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join us as 7th Heaven once again teaches us about the dangers of smoking. This episode has everything: classic "issue of the week" chaos, plot twists, and lectures! Unfortunately Lucy is still there though.

We drank a special cocktail this week, the "Smoking Lemon":

Mezcal, Lemon Juice, Honey Syrup, Bitters, and Cointreau

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show, the issue is jury duty . . . for the second time. The B plots include, a fight with Ashlee Simpson we didn't understand and Annie being really weird about Eric's therapist-patient confidentiality. Also Roxanne gets slashed with a knife.

We drank:

Water 

Iced Coffee (Lost Sock Roasters, DC)

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This is an episode about very sloppy plot devices and cystic fibrosis. A substantial amount of the runtime is dedicated to horseback riding montages.

We drank - water!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show: no one is successfully resting on Sunday, Simon and Ashlee Simpson are stressing about discussing their sex plans with their parents, Roxanne and Chandler spontaneously get together, Lucy is not able to stalk them as much as she might wish, and Eric seems to have a change of heart, but I guess not.

We drank:

Decoy Merlot 2022

Water

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show we discuss an episode that is almost entirely about Usher's special guest starring role. We are also introduced to an amazing new Glen Oak location - Club Minor!

Drinks:

Morgan - Choya Plum Wine

Greg - San Pellegrino Blood Orange Zero and Plymouth Gin

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the podcast, there's a never-ending ho down at the pool hall, Eric quits everything that gives his life meaning (aka meddling), Lucy and Chandler have a protestant sanctuary picnic that Kevin does not approve of, and Roxanne continues to sow chaos.

Greg Drank: Coors Banquet and Southern Tier Irish Cream Stout

Morgan Drank: Ice Water!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Special sick zoom edition! This time it's all about spying and sneaking, and Richard Lewis rambling. 

Morgan was drinking hot water ha, Greg drank the "Reverend's Old Fashioned"

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week, we discuss a very Promenade-centered episode that also features the Colonel's unhinged former housemaid. Ashlee Simpson is still annoying.

Greg drank some Cazadores Tequila and A & W.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We welcome David back to the podcast to discuss an episode with quite a bit of meddling, a roving "puppeteering" troupe, and being rude to Ashlee Simpson.

We drank: Modest Coffee Roasters - The Enthusiast

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Happy New Year fans! We are back with kind of a weird one as Eric drops in and out of the eternal Elvis consciousness and everyone pressures Kevin to propose to Lucy in the hospital cafeteria. Also, Simon has secrets on secrets.

Greg drank a bastardization of a "Chunnel" (Gin, St. Germain, Lemon Juice)

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

As we continue to limp into Season 7, Eric confronts his mortality for the first time, despite his pastoral training, Simon's love for Ashlee Simpson and penchant for surrendering babies has sent him into an angsty spiral, and Lucy notices the writers forgot her character development.



This week we drank Freakshow Cabernet Sauvignon

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

The audio is fucked but we are posting this in lieu of nothing, because we aren't re-recording such a whatever episode.

There's a lost hat plot that goes nowhere, a highly confusing birth and baby surrender, and Ben leaves.

Greg drank:
Tequila mixed into the bad seltzers in my fridge.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we discuss part two of the season premiere and come up with one of our greatest plot remixes yet. Mary gets shipped to Florida, Lou fails to bust Eric for his real estate antics, and Kevin and Ashlee Simpson continue to be living non sequiturs.

Greg Drank:
Tito's Vodka Mixed with Black Razzberry LaCroix

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Welcome to Season 7! It was so bad StudioAT almost called it quits. We made the best of it. At least their were stunt chimps.

Greg Drank: Excelsior Cabernet Sauvignon 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the pod we have a "very special episode" where we look back on some of our favorite moments from the last six seasons. And also Greg's wedding. See y'all next season.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

It's the end of Season 6 and we finally get to Matt and Sarah's second wedding. It's about what you would expect in the end idk.



Greg Drank:

San Pellegrino Blood Orange Zero

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We are ambling into the midway point of the series with this "season finale" episode. Enjoy I guess!

Greg drank:
Cold Cellars California Savingnon 2022

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Remember when everyone forgot about 9/11? Well you won't after this.


Greg Drank:
Sanpellegrino Blood Orange Zero Sugar

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey hey hey, this week on the pod we are crawling towards the end of the season with a truly terrible filler episode. One of the worst we've had in months. IDK enjoy!


Greg drank:
Sanpellegrino Blood Orange Zero

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show we get some exciting airplane interior shots, more Matt & Sarah drama, and post-9/11 TSA jokes.

We drank Joel Gott Sauvignon Blanc and Water

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the podcast we discuss the finale to 7th Heaven's 3-part exploration of Judaism as the Camdens attend their first Shabbat dinner with the Glass family. All is going fine until Eric finds out Matt may convert to Judaism and blows his top, yet again. Also everyone treats Morris like shit, then they eat cake.

Bonus: we describe our toenail health. 


This week we drank:
H20! It's hot

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week, it's part II of the Matt marriage saga. Matt and Sarah get tangled in a web of lies related to their speedy nuptials, while Ruthie alone knows the truth. Then everyone knows Ruthie knows the truth, and also all the characters suddenly become omniscient and learn the truth of their own accord. 7th Heaven video game concept ideas are also contemplated.

Greg Drank:
Pilsner Urquell

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Sorry about audio issues on this one gang, not sure what is up. Will try to fix for next time. We hope you suffer through it because this was a really fun episode, but unfortunately when we laugh the audio clips . . . whoops.

This week on the podcast, our friend David joins us to talk about a truly distinctive episode . 7th Heaven has abruptly shifted to a one-plot "meet cute" where the writers make the entire episode about Judaism, yet do no research. Also we found the literal worst political position ever.

We drank:
21st Amendment - Hell or High Watermelon
Pilsner Urquell Lager

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Howdy ya'll, it's another Valentines's Day episode in which Eric does all sorts of research about sex in his church office, Robbie is back and continues to be the perfect Christian boyfriend despite Joy's temptress attempts, Lucy's writing is really not doing her any favors, Matt is living in the past, and Simon has a cool new girlfriend who loves early 2000s denim.

This week Greg drank:
Pineapple Stateside Vodka Soda

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

It's an episode about drinking - a teen tv trope as old as time.  Plus Matt is afraid to fly the coop and go to med school. Notably, even though he liked the episode Greg has a record number of plot remixes.


We Drank: Oseki Sake Dry

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

It's a doozy - 7th Heaven takes on Islamophobia whilst making no reference to the political state of America in the early 2000's. You won't want to miss this blast from the past.

We drank:

Zero Gravity - Little Wolf
Liquid Death - Severed Lime

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the pod, Mrs. Riddle is back in Ruthie's life, Annie quits her job to aspire to be Aristotle, Simon gets in more car trouble, and Matt and Robbie fight again. Ben shows up too, idk it was a bad one! 


Greg Drank: Charm City Mead

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week the janky writing trend continues, we're done with parodying Survivor and have moved on to parodying the OJ Simpson car chase. Also, Matt and Robbie are at each other's throats for no apparent reason, Mary tries to strong arm her way into the Glen Oak fire department, and Ginger enlists Eric to help her with some sneaky business. 



We forgot to say what we were drinking. It was Cherry Coke and water. Exciting!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

I think it's better if you go into this one knowing nothing and waiting for the ending.


Greg drank: Red Bear Brewing Co. Peak Bloom

Morgan drank: water

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

On today's episode we have the surprising combination of a Survivor parody (Outwit, Outplay, Outlast) and an overt promotional music video for the budding Christina Aguilara wannabe Joy Enriquez. It's different, for sure.


This week we drank:
Stateside Vodka Soda - Black Cherry
Old Faithful - Water

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

It's a clumsy plot about a family coup over the attic room, but also the prodigal son. The son is Mary, idk.

This week we drank:
Tsingtao Lager

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the pod, Matt jumps to some assumptions about his study group's weird arm bruises, Simon is in a Dairy Shack Bermuda Triangle with Sasha, Lucy and Robbie decide not to date after all, and Hank and Julie get trapped in a room by Eric and Annie to talk out their issues.

We drank:
Asahi Super Dry
Tucher Bräu - Helles Hefe Weizen

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Time for an episode full of relationships, like every other episode. Annie tries to teach and immediately gets into deep trouble, Matt breaks up with Cheryl, Robbie tries not to date Lucy, Eric makes "special eggs".


This week we drank:

Tina's homemade egg nog mixed with Bailey's. We know it is February but someone has to.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Both Tina and Rebecca join us to discuss various work mishaps and goals - Simon becomes a pizza finance man, Matt finds his calling in jumping over obstetric lines of authority, Annie wants to teach with no qualifications, and Robbie wants to set Lucy up until he doesn't.


This week on the podcast we drank various test cocktails for Greg's wedding.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Another preggo teen has entered the chat, Annie's character is still irrational hormonal woman, they fight over rooms again, Mary tries mothering, and Ray the scammer tries to fall off a ladder for cash. 

This week we drank Corralejo Blanco tequila.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

In a divisive episode, Morgan rates this episode super high and Greg rates it very low. But you can bet this one is weird, especially Morgan Fairchild's guest appearance. Happy Holidays to everyone!


This week we drank:
Duchesse de Bourgogne Duchesse Petite

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Season 6 begins! And it is . . . underwhelming. But we still get in the festive holiday spirit with Grinchy takes.

This week we drank:
H20
Egg Nog and a discount Irish Whiskey with Bourbon and Spanish Barrels?


Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Well that's done with, good riddance a whole two episode arc about some people dating and marrying or whatever.

This week we drank:
Carlsberg
Orange Olipop



Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Time for part 1 of the season 5 finale. It's rife with a lot of convoluted amorous shenanigans and Ruthie is pretty much the only good part. StudioAT loves it though, so to each their own.

We drank:
Carlsberg Lager
Pressed Green Juice

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

You won't want to miss this one, which is chock full of action related to researching petitions before you sign them, registering to vote, and Grandpa's bastard daughter Lily.

We drank - Raspberry Lemonade and  Makgeolli

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the pod, we are talking relationships and secrets, as Matt attempts to hide his new girlfriend Cheryl from Robbie, and Robbie attempts to hide his innocent study/nursing session with Heather from Matt. Also Ruthie had cool shirts, and Annie was as unhinged and jealous as ever, but at least she made a lot of pie. Simon's datebook fills up as he discovers ladies love virginal twinks.

We drank - Cloudbreak Petite Syrah

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This episode was so bad we forgot to even rate it. We experience a 1 plot show all about Mary's doppelganger/cosmic twin Marie. The best part was Robbie's dancing.

Greg drank a Heineken
I drank H2O.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Matt spends the day philosophizing and gallivanting with a random hospital patient instead of attending his psych evaluation, Ruthie smuggles sandwiches, Sasha has a real weird conversation with Annie to save her relationship with Simon, Eric has some issues with death deadlines, and Mike is still just hanging around.


This week we drank:

Cocobon Estates Red Blend

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the podcast . . . bad parenting! Robbie's dad (Alan Thicke) is in town and boy is he a sneak, an ungrateful house guest, and just generally a scam artist. Lucy's mom friend Serena is also a piece of work, picking up 27 yr old boys with her zig zag part. Ruthie lies and connives, Simon is being a baby about a paper.

This week Greg drank:
Summer of Littles, Le Cheeserie Series #2

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the pod, special guest Rebecca joins us for an episode almost exclusively about a condom. We also get pretty off track discussing things like the cultural impact of Baskin Robbins.

We drank:
Hoegaarden
Heineken

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Sorry the audio is a little rough, we had the AC going and it seems to have affected things, should be better next time.

It's Valentine's Day in Glen Oak, of course that means lots of transportation word problems and meddling. In short: Lucy runs into all her exes during her first date with Jeremy, Robbie has a mystery date, John and Pricilla continue to make no sense, and Bert brings Ruthie a pony. 

Greg drank Makers Mark and Wild Cherry Pepsi

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show, Ruthie is a Heavy Metal Mama, Mike is a jerk, John hates Japanese decor, and Lucy is moving on. 

Greg drank an Austrian Riesling

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Ok this is also the 100th episode (for the show, not us). We continue our chicken sando brunch party recording session as the show has a bizarre anniversary episode that is sort of like a season finale, but also just the same shit as always. Good news, Mrs. Bink is in this one.

We drank:
Still the Rock's tequila

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we have . . . an episode. The rehabilitation of Robbie (and ruining of John) continues,  Mary is back, but only as a special phone guest star, Ruthie falls in love with Robbie, and the "naked" jokes continue.

We drank:

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's Tequila mixed with Grapefruit soda (aka a "Xolo")

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Welcome to our 100th episode. We do some novel stuff like investigating the IMDB history of Studio AT/KGF Vissers and playing 7th Heaven trivia. Here is the link to the trivia we did at the end of the show.

The plot this week was SURPRISE Robbie is good now and John is bad.

We drank:
Old Pal (Death & Co.) - Rittenhouse 100 proof Rye, Aperol, Dry Vermouth, Lemon Twist

Mint Julep

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We're back with one about music censorship, seems about right for 7th heaven. Simon has fallen in with a group of misogynistic 14 yr old white boys that stand around listening to gangsta rap and disrespecting his mom, Matt loves Tipper Gore and also maybe Heather, and Robbie comes home to roost.

We drank:
Vodka and juice, Boss Black Coffee, and Grapefruit Mimosas

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

No longer dependent upon admonishing Mary's "bad girl" attitude, the show immediately replaces her ethos with the Olsen twins. Also, we learn some wholesome lessons about gossiping, not ditching your dance date, and how L is for losers.


We drank:
Haku Vodka and Raspberry Apple Juice
Iced Caramel Macchiato 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

You guys, have you heard Mary is bad? Well she has been for 6 episodes straight and this one is finally putting an end to it via "winter in Buffalo". Nothing much happens besides Mary evading, Mary getting caught in an intervention, and Mary getting sent to upstate New York.

We drank:
Guiness
Water

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

You guys Mary is bad, and it's all coming out. That and nothing else happened this episode. One more to go and then this show is going to have to figure out something else to do with itself.


This week we drank:
Gin and Tonic
Watermelon Strawberry Polar Seltzer

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m
This week, the Frankie and Johnnie "arc" finally reaches its conclusion, Mary continues to be very bad at life, Lucy learns the perils of little girl friendships, Eric can't help but meddle all day, Simon gets a manly earring, and Matt is at his creepiest yet.

We drank some sparkling water and regular water.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

This episode, this episode is something. Mary's downward spiral continues because she looks at a joint, Ruthie sneaks into Eric and Annie's room and carefully records their sexual escapades for a school project, Simon goes on a date with an extremely irritating spelling champion, and Lucy drops her egg beau for a far worse suitor. 


This week we drank:
Hayman Gin Martinis
Green Tea

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

This week Mary starts a new job at the pizza parlor which apparently is spiraling into a 3 episode arc involving a beloved Grey's Anatomy cast member. Matt continues to be the worst, going on a milk-fueled bender and forgetting to drive Simon on his date, Annie and Eric get jealous and this turns them on, and Lucy has a new beau/egg husband. 

We drank:
The Champagne of Beers
Tecate of Questionable Quality

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

The theme this week is taking responsibility or blame or something. Everyone is fairly annoying except Lucy. Matt and Mary are peak terrible! And our old friend the Colonel shows up.

We drank:
Ozeki Sake Dry
Lukusowa Vodka and Hey Song Sasparilla

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

Welcome to Season 5! We go on an extended rant about one particular Bar Rescue episode from 10 years ago before getting into the new season. Matt and Heather spontaneously break up, Lucy and Andrew spontaneously break up, Mary and Robbie spontaneously break up, and Ruthie has some demands for the youth of America.



We drank:
Taco Bell Drinks, Polar Seltzer, and Justin Cab Sav

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Join our discord server: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

We decided to take a brief break before starting Season 5 and do something special. That something special is a completely out of hand celebrity reality television program "starring" 7th Heaven's own Beverly Mitchell. Please enjoy!

This week we drank:
Taco Bell Dr. Pepper, Mountain Dew, and free wine from my office.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Check out our show Discord!: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

It's the end! The Hulu series finale is here. Strengthened by a trip to Taco Bell (and a long discussion about it), your hosts finish out the year.

We drank Taco Bell's weird drinks.

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Check out our show Discord!: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

We did it, the Season 4 finale is here! Good riddance. It's a two parter as all the kids deal with romantic drama. Ruthie has a new boy toy to boss around, Simon's relationship with Deena may be coming to an end, Matt needs to dump Shana to follow his heart and be with Heather, Lucy continues to blow off Andrew Nayloss counter to her true feelings, and Robbie is most unfortunately back on the scene.

This week we drank a Plymouth martini and Fortaleza on the rocks.

If you are interested in the Jessica Biel Scoop podcast episodes Jeanette wrote to us about, you can listen to them here:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/worst-ever-podcast-with-christine-and-alaa/id1225846060?i=1000431848743

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/worst-ever-podcast-with-christine-and-alaa/id1225846060?i=1000430889519

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Check out our show Discord!: https://discord.gg/6vQ7nPSH4m

We're rounding the corner headed towards the season finale, and boy are the writers throwing some things at the wall this week. We review an episode that is just a laundry list of all the dumb stuff that has happened on the show this season so far, as a seedy town reporter digs into the family's dark past! Also John justifiably throws a VCR tape at a tv and gets accused on doing drugs. 

We drank:
Fiction - Field Recordings, Red Blend

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Oh boy, time for yet another episode about the perils of miscommunication that itself has a very difficult time getting its point across. This week we are joined by girl/friend of the show Tina to discuss some of the most unexpected standalone scenes on 7th Heaven yet.

Also, exciting news! We decided to make a discord for our community to come chat about the show. You can join it here: https://discord.gg/SN33j9qd  
We drank:
Odd Bailey's Concoctions
Red Wine
Cherry Pomegranate Sparkling Water

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Get ready for an episode that is focused almost exclusively on Mary' s extreme narcissism, as she dreams of making it big in the bball "pros". Plus, Matt still won't stop with Shauna, Eric and Annie reveal their insecure sides, and Ruthie sets her sights on the Crown.


This week Greg drank Soto and One Cup Sake and also Guinness

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the pod we are graced with another politically dicey one, as Eric participates in a terrible reverse 12 Angry Men plot. The other plots are of no consequence, as Matt has alone time in the church at night, Mary and Lucy squabble over boys some more, Ruthie gets in trouble for cutting her classmate's hair, and Simon's life is still revolving around an accidental hickey he applied several weeks ago.

This week we just drank some boring water and stuff.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Sorry the episode is late, some moving delays, but things are sorted now. Happy Oktoberfest, this week we bring you arguably one of the worst 7th Heaven plots yet. Actually nothing happens, but we aim to entertain you as best we can.

This week we drank:
Hofbrau Festbier Out of a Boot

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey gang, welcome to fall! We've got turtlenecks because this episode is about hickeys. Also, an experimental film on the twins' birthday, bad news about Robby, and Matt continues to be a terrible roommate, boyfriend, and regular friend. 

We drank a bunch of red wine and then some Waterloo Blackberry Lemon Seltzer. 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

There was bullying galore in this one, buckle up as new churchgoer Bobby Carver is bullied for Tourette's, Ruthie is bullied by another bitchy teacher, Mary doesn't bully, but observes bullying of flannel-loving classmate Denise, and Shauna bullies Matt into never ever breaking up with her ever ever ever. Niche Game Boy topics are also discussed.

We Drank:

Laphroaig 10 Year Scotch
Bacardi Mixed with Limoncello LaCroix

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Great one! Lance Bass plays a major role as Lucy gets caught up in a platonic double date turned sexy. Matt is the worst. Simon and Nigel are wrapped up in a hell of a lot in the name of sociology, and Ruthie considers herself a modern day Rumpelstiltskin.

This week we continued to drink whatever was in my fridge and at the bar.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Time for a quick and chaotic one, as Annie escapes to the seashore with Happy and the rest of the family is left to fend for themselves. Lucy and Mary wait for their boyfriends to call and get increasingly upset with men as a species, Matt continues to be insufferable, Simon really needs to break up with Deena, and Ruthie is her pure terrible self as always.

This week Greg drank:

Eastciders - Blood Orange Cider

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey hey, this week, we are talking Y2K preppers, an oddly comical plot about Alzheimer's disease, depressed Cocoa Puff binges, and some boys named Brad and Robby or whatever. A great way to send off the century! 

We drank:
Senate Beer - Right Proper
Scrum & Hooker - True Respite
Some misc. wine greg had leftover

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the podcast, we discuss the infamous paint huffing episode. Simon is a snitch, Matt is in a sandwich delivering Groundhog's day, Ruthie makes a beautiful sculpture, and Mary continues to be a bad bitch.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we discuss an episode about: teen girls excluding, elementary girls excluding, Simon moping over Captain Crunch, Mary moping over exclusion, and Matt being the worst at dating Shauna. Also, the complete non sequitur of a Japanese internment camp reparation money plot.

We drank:

Austin Eastciders Blood Orange
Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast, part two of Mary's transgressions as she faces the consequences of her gym trashing. Simon and Ruthie visit three different houses of worship and learn essentially nothing, Matt continues to be a bummer, and we find out Lucy is in fact running all of Glen Oak High.

This week Greg drank some Trader Joes Red Ale beer.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast: controversy begins as Mary's basketball season is cancelled due to poor grades, Matt comes up with every excuse under the sun for why he needs to come home and help his family, and Simon gets in big trouble for something that does not matter in the least. Lucy is in this episode too, but we don't understand why.

We Drank:

Right Proper - Senate Beer
Deep Bay - Citrus Mint Gin Soda

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We're back with improved sound, thanks for waiting! This week we discuss an episode about how all women are crazy, namely a very pregnant Aunt Julie. Also, Simon almost gets picked up by a 25 year old at the pool hall, Ruthie has another secret animal plot, and Lucy learns about the perils of heteronormative dating tropes.


This week we drank the Right Proper variety pack

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

NOTE: Still working through sound issues, a new computer has not fixed the issue and it is intermittent, we believe it may be the mics themselves. Thanks for your patience!

This week on the show - Matt reevaluates his life path after talking to "Zen Master" hospital patient Adam, Mary feels left out from hectic bathroom renovations, Eric almost doesn't get his annual raise because Lou should not be allowed to work anywhere, and Simon struggles with how to deal with his new admirer Beth.

This week we drank leftover wine out of a water bottle. Class.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week - more feminism! We sure learned a lot about the Taliban. Plus Simon is too good at cooking . . . and that's a problem, Ruthie is a beast on the grid iron, and some misogynist Christian men are too much, even for Eric. 

This week we drank Pacifico from the bottle, because it was what I could reach on the shelf.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We dive into the second episode of season 4, which is a lot of nothing until Eric reveals cosmic details about his near death experience. Also, Simon tries to be man of the house in Matt's absence (annoying Simon is back!), Lucy decides she's quite content on the high school's "B List", and John continues to be a good friend to Matt even though he doesn't deserve it at all.

Stay tuned until the end for a surprising twist about our favorite IMDB reviewer!

Greg drank a sparkling electrolyte tea water drink with mango. 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hello loyal listeners and welcome to Season 4, finally! The tone has changed, the hair has changed, the Colonel has changed - it's a whole new world. However some things are immutable - like classic 7th Heaven bedroom exchanges, Annie being unreasonable, and Eric being stressed about his job.

This week Greg drank Teddy's Strawberry and Cream soda.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Season 3 finally comes to an end as we finish up Part II of the finale. The longest day ever reveals that Matt loves Shauna, Simon loves french kissing, Ruthie loves occult ritual, and Aunt Julie can't decide if she loves Dr. Hastings. Jordan is still here giving out bits of wisdom, unfortunately, and Annie still hasn't gotten laid. Onward to Season 4!

This week Greg drank Soju again.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We dive into Part 1 of the Season 3 finale! No one has planned a single element of Heather's impending wedding, although it is only 48 hours away. Matt is asked to play usher, something his girlfriend hates, while Ruthie vengefully curses the affair using her time-bending abilities. Mary is secretly "playing basketball" with Jordan, as Simon manages a tricky situation with Deena's cousin Cindy.  Annie doesn't care about any of the main plots and just wants to get railed.

This week we drank some mezcal margaritas from a local restaurant!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

In this special snow day broadcast, we tackle a bizarro episode featuring elderly dogs and dog spirit metaphysics, Simon's special French restaurant date, buddy cop time with Matt and Sgt Michaels, and more Michael Towner shenanigans.

This week we drank Reyka Icelandic Vodka with South Korea's own "WaterUp Melon" soda.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We are rounding the corner on the end of Season 3, but first another wacky one. Rudy the custodian is talking to god, which brings up some interesting questions about the mechanics of divine will and fate that the show never even attempts to address. While Eric is distracted with Rudy, Annie sneaks off to the pool hall to down way too many Diet Cokes with her girlfriends. Ruthie is dealing with a very pesky neighborhood chimpanzee, but her whole family thinks she is playing make believe. Matt continues to be insecure in his relationship, while Mary and Lucy have a plot of no consequence that makes no sense. 


This week Greg drank Mountain Dew Spark, not recommended. 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Oh boy, we ring in the New Year with this very special anti-MeToo episode. The President of Matt's university is embroiled in a scandal (sleeping with a student) that has the Camdens taking sides. There is only one side, strangely. Also, hijinks ensue when Mrs. Hinkle helps Simon and Ruthie collect from their delinquent newspaper route subscriber. It's not one you will want to miss, as we conclude with a shocking revelation!

This week we drank a lot. It was New Years Eve.

Union Brewing AM Gold
Eastciders Original Dry Cider
Plymouth Martinis

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

On the cast this week, another Season 3 episode of complete time wasting as the babies continue to be annoying, yet are visited by a barrage of house guests. Some of them want a divorce and chaos ensues. Also, Matt tries to join the army to get out from under Eric's  control, Simon worries his luck is dwindling, and Mary and Lucy almost get themselves killed over some lying boys.

Before the cast this week we drank some Tozai sake - specifically the Living Jewel and Snow Maiden varieties. Dramatic names! 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Note: Don't be alarmed, we will be switching back to a bi-weekly format from this point. Thanks to all our dedicated listeners!

This week, we are back from Thanksgiving festivities to discuss a real Season 3 stand-out. The theme is "paranoia" as Eric worries he is being replaced at work, Lucy assumes Jimmy Moon is headed down a path of hard weed-selling, and Simon tries his hand at the athlete life. Also, Matt is embroiled in another 90's phone plot that would never work in 2021.

We drank Greg's liquor cabinet:
Chum Churum OG
Unfiltered Sake
Ruby Port

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

In short, do not watch this unless you love the sounds of constant screaming. If you do, just skip to the Mary and Matt parts. On to the next one.

This week Greg was double fisting a Strawberry Milkshake and Coors Banquet.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast: Annie finally gives birth and it is terribly anticlimactic. Mary is not the woman we thought she was. Simon hits puberty like a brick wall and is becoming a grown man. The Matt needle-phobia plot repeats. It's real bad.

This week we drank:

Guinness from a nitro can (not a real pint).

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Now this is some classic 7th Heaven nonsense. The Camden twins are on the way so everyone has jobs, except Lucy who is mysteriously away at a camp of one. Ruthie picks a fight with a whole family of neighbors, while Morgan, Matt, Eric, and John meet with the world's worst restaurant, and a gaggle of irritating church ladies take over the house. Plus old ladies robotripping.

This week we drank Boddington's Pub Ale

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we mostly enjoy another filler episode. The theme is forgiveness, or redemption, or something else probably. Matt stalks Heather, Simon almost ruins his friendship with Nigel, Mary's craving male attention, and Rod's mom sadly passes away. Despite being an ok episode, not much to say again.

This week Greg drank a wild cherry Pepsi.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week, it's time for a terrible filler episode. The theme is, crying to get what you want, being really annoying to your grown sister, leukemia, and why sometimes women are turned on and sometimes aren't. Idk, we didn't have much to say about this mess - see you next time.

We pre-gamed this episode with some Silver Branch pilsner.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

It's Christmas already in Glen Oak, and Eric has plans to voluntell the Camdens what to do: Mary is off to the soup kitchen, Matt plays mall Santa, and Lucy runs auditions for the live nativity scene. All of this goes essentially nowhere, as Eric and Annie get caught up in peddling their favorite objects to buy more stuff for each other. Also some cute guy named Carlos shows up and leaves as quickly as he came. Simon gives away his tiny pajamas.

This week we drank life on earth's favorite beverage - water!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast, it's a "plot" about the birds and the bees featuring the world's most nonsensical college course and Lucy's extremely unhealthy attitudes towards men. Plus, Simon learns some hard lessons about the perils of  babysitting the ever-devious Ruthie.


This week we drank: mediocre variety pack beers.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Addiction is the topic of this week's episode, mostly uppers! Simon drinks a single cup of coffee and is ruined for life, Ruthie's bit is barely related to the plot again, Matt gets some library pills, and Diane nearly dies from the same.

This week Greg drank some blue berry lemonade :)

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Wow, what a doozy this one is. Gun violence in schools, Lucy's secret BDSM fantasies, Mary dating a pinball machine assaulter, and Ruthie being as annoying as always. Also something extremely dramatic and unexpected we won't spoil for you here!

This week we drank Rothhaus and Chang beer.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we're met with a bad filler episode full of recycled plots and half-developed ideas. Lucy has a new "boyfriend" we don't remember, Simon is interviewing a possible new girlfriend supplied by Laura (who apparently broke up with him), Matt and Mary are drinking milk and driving, and Grandpa and Ginger almost call their wedding off due to an impromptu cemetery trip. Also Millard the homeless WWII vet is super weird and we don't like him.

We drank a lazy concoction of Peach Soju, Cazadores Reposado and OJ

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We sit down with a very stereotypical 7th heaven episode: dumb one-liners, some d-plot involving small children, Matt rescuing another pregnant woman, Eric meddling in the lives of troubled parishioners, a Mary/Lucy feud of sorts, and just a lot of school bus bullying. 

This week we drank:
Miller High Life (The Champagne of Beers) in a can with a salt rim

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast, we enter a Lewis Carroll fever dream of nonsense that relentlessly inverts logic and assaults our ears with discordant jazz. Matt's hot for teacher, Mary tears it up on the monkey bars, and Lucy - well Lucy's plot just has to be seen to be believed.

We drank:
Tecate Tall Boys and Topo Chico Pineapple Hard Seltzer

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

The famous Allison Mack episode is on deck! Ruthie has a scheme to suck at math for attention and profit, Matt can't stop asking people what is wrong with him, Mary is very on point and spends the episode trying to warn everyone about Allison Mack, and corn dogs abound!

This week we drank some local beers at the local bar.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey gang, this week on the cast - the dangers of binge drinking, the dangers of binary gender, and just nonstop off topic asides + hiccuping. Matt learns some hard lessons about how much frats suck during his first semester at college, Annie simultaneously wants Simon to adhere to gender roles and is then mad when he does, Lucy meanwhile becomes an amazing amateur mechanic, and Mary continues to trap men in her web of masculine interests. Also, some church lady makes a big move on Eric by gently touching his wrist, which pisses Simon off to no end.


We drank:

Natty Ice from cans

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We begin Season 3 with Annie's annoying pregnancy antics and a fresh year of school for the Camden kids. Matt moves in with 3 women off campus, an impossible situation that can never work out because women are foul temptresses. Speaking of which, Mary and Lucy get involved in a unilateral boy dating contest, which Mary handily wins by being gayer, and Simon's gf Laura has taken a serious turn for the worst.

This week we enjoyed:
A lot of Clyde's Beefeater Martinis and "Lion's Milk"

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Wow, we are done season 2! Wild and wacky times abound: Mary's pregnancy scare is quickly forgotten, Happy is dyed pink, MITs preach that ambidexterity is next to godliness, and Kenny is . . . pretty weird.


This week we drank:

Heavy Seas Tropicannon
Fortaleza  Blanco Tequila
The Botanist Gin and Soda

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey everyone! Turns out we're taking that break we talked about this week. See you next week to finish off season 2 with a bang.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Part I of the Season 2 finale! Matt finally starts to crack as the whole family guilts him about leaving, Billy is really annoying, and Happy's custody battle is ignited. Also Rod and Jimmy are better at Eric's job than he is. Oh yeah and Mary is "pregnant". Just throw that in there at the end. Why is every season finale cliff hanger about Mary?


We were too tired to drink this time.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast: Matt goes to the prom with a "harlot" out of spite, Ruthie's world view is shattered when she learns life-size dancing stegosauruses aren't real, Mary and Lucy have a plot about dating creepy twins that doesn't need to exist, PLUS a 90s ska montage about making a dress out of curtains.

We drank a lot of stuff before recording, but during recording it was Denizens Born Bohemian Pils.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We are headed towards the Season 2 finish line with this awkward filler episode. It involves a really dirty daughter/father duo, Simon attempting to steal said dirty daughter, Matt hating his family, Sgt. Michaels not following a single department policy, and more Camden room drama. 

This week we drank:
Fortaleza Blanco
Jackie O's Razz Wheat

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Friend of the show and noted Frenchman Stephen is back to help us analyze what we have deemed the best episode of 7th Heaven yet! Goofiness and camp are in full effect as a charming, somewhat sexist, flakey, and chain smoking French foreign exchange student moves in with the Camdens. We also learn some important lessons about Internet safety. 

Greg drank the sad dog beer again.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast: Lucy encounters grief when her friend dies in a brutal accident (it's someone we don't know or care about), more secrets of the Camden house layout are revealed, Ruthie is unfortunately becoming as annoying as Simon, and Mary continues to do everything in her power to avoid touching cute boys.

We drank:
Flying Dog Blood Line Blood Orange Ale. This sad dog beer really had me talking like a sailor this week - explicit content ahead!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

On the show this week: Eric and Morgan do not break any kneecaps, nearly everyone ends up at a movie they do not want to watch, Matt and John go to the jazz club where John has a jazz meltdown, and some very uncomfortable padded bra scenes occur.

We were drinking:

Paloma
2 oz Tequila
Squeeze of Fresh Lime
Grapefruit soda such as Squirt or Ting.

Build in glass with ice and top with soda. Salt rim optional.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the cast: going to the worst museum is the worst plot, Mary and former bball rival Diane cultivate a budding romance, a lot of talk about a dance that we never see, Suzanne hits the mean streets of Glen Oak, and the debut of one hot (and mean) science teacher. 

We drank the soju Chum Churum.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Believe us when we tell you this is a good one. Tune in for: the world's worst restaurant, the beanie weenies after school special, a completely left field fake heart attack, and of course, dog credit cards!


Drink this week:
Morgan's Negroni
1 oz Aperol
1 oz Sweet Vermouth
1 oz Gin

 Build in tumbler with ice, stir, and garnish with a lemon twist.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Boy do we have an episode on our hands. Lucy can't decide between newly-single Jimmy Moon and pseudo-stoner Rod, so the rest of the family takes bets on her pick. Grandpa shows up with an interesting new look and a lot of immature feelings. Eric and Annie try to help three young couples get their lives together, with limited success. And Ruthie hops in every scene to talk about the trials and tribulations of her new lizards. 


This week we drank:

Bare Bones Kolsch - Hellbender
Sauvignon Blanc - Decoy

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week on the show: discordant plots collide as Simon nurses a golfing addiction, church accountant and resident jerk Lou gets caught stealing from the coffers, and the Camden kids take down Coach Creeper with the help of feminist Principal Whitmer.


The Spaghett
Bottle of Miller High Life (drink some for room)
1 oz Aperol
1 oz Lemon Juice

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

On our plate this episode: Eric forgets the roast (and honestly everything else in his life) because he was busy staring at Microsoft Word for three days, Mary is feeling insecure about new bball player in town, Diane, Lucy struggles to understand the history of the Vietnam War, which makes her seem cool to slacker boy Todd, Simon fancies himself a magician, and the Colonel flies in on an emergency mission to sort out all this nonsense.



This week's cocktail:
The Simoni
1 oz London Dry Gin
1 oz Aperol
.5 oz Sweet Vermouth
.5 oz Fresh Tangerine Juice

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Sorry my mic sounds real warble-y this time, Greg told me to record in the bath tub during our swimming lessons. On the show this week: Eric is worried about his "water weight" so he eats everything in town, Simon is trying to teach Ruthie how to swim above her weight class, Lucy gets burned by the Mila Kunis mean girls yet again, and Mary starts dating a weird frog mutilator, but he's pretty cute.

This week Greg was drinking some "Smoking Loon" cab, watch out!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Guys, we did it successfully this time. The famous "3/3 IMDB reviewers give this episode 10/10" holocaust episode of 7th Heaven has been officially analyzed. There are three plots about hate of extremely varying degrees, and believe it or not, a full scene we deemed to be "good".

We completely forgot to mention it, but this week we were drinking Dirty Little Freak brown ale from the Baltimore brewery DuClaw. We liked it!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hi gang, we screwed up the audio for today's episode so we need to take this week off to muster up our will to re-record the whole thing. See you next Sunday, same Bat Time same Bat Place!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we bring you the most Shark Tank episode of 7th Heaven yet. There are facts, there are figures, not a contract is in sight. Also Matt hosts a one man ball game, Mary renounces the trappings of heteronormativity, and The Tick is cross promoted up and down.

Korean Girl Group Audition We discussed: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYefPQgBZNI&ab_channel=nokot36

This week we (Greg) drank leftover Marsala wine. Not recommended or endorsed, but not disparaged either.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Watch out world, Shiri Appleby is here and she is a hardcore gangster complete with that traditional suburban gangster accoutrement - a Hot Topic belt buckle. Also this episode: we learn Lucy wants her ashes scattered about the local mall escalators so she can rest with Jim the mall cop forever, Simon is "getting into" hang gliding, and Ruthie's repetitive comedic relief tactics reach new heights of annoying.

This week we drank the Brooklyn Brewery "Mix Tape" variety pack. It was bad, don't buy it.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

All of the dangerous liaisons dangerously end in this messy episode chock full of romances gone wrong. First, Matt plans a terrible cross country road trip to grovel at the feet of Heather, Simon learns about the perils of dating Friends side characters, Ruthie goes head to head with Mrs. Rainy when she interrupts her Xena LARP, and Eric crushes poor little puppy dog Wilson. Mary moves on quickly. Lucy is also sort of in it.

This week we drank our beloved Cazadores Reposado with grapefruit juice.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Oh no, here comes another filler episode focused on Simon and Mrs. Bink. We do our best to keep you entertained despite it all. This includes: a lot of discussion about charismatic cult leaders, our favorite shapes of ice, and significant whining about how bad this one is.


What we were drinking:

21st Amendment - Hell or High Pomegranate
Cazadores Reposado and Soda

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

It's one of the most famous, yet thinly plotted episodes in 7th Heaven's history, what can really be said? Essentially, that Eric is out of control and Ruthie is Bean Daughter. Also, Greg's cat Dany makes a special guest appearance!


This week we drank:

Some Riesling we can't remember the name of. No particular reason we can't remember, really!

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey dear listeners, this week we are rolling right along in Season 3 with an episode based entirely around the phrase "I Love You." We learn Ruthie loves snooping, Eric loves chicken, Mary loves bothering Wilson, and Laurie loves deep cut house music. Also we just go on a mostly unprompted ten minute rant about fried chicken and hamburgers at one point. Blame it on the third beer.


This episode we drank some local brews:
Flying Dog "In God We Crush"
Silver Branch "Obsidian Castle"

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we are joined by friend of the show Mama Teri to discuss a riveting episode about the perils of ill-conceived public school policies, as all five Camden kids head off to their first day of the new school year and are then immediately suspended. Also, Mila Kunis makes her return and it's devastatingly shallow, the kid from Home Improvement threatens to jump off a building because his pant legs are too wide, and Happy attempts to get another bubble bath. 


This week's cocktail!:

Calvados Spritz
1 oz Calvados
1/2 oz Fresh Lemon Juice
1/2 oz Simple Syrup

Shake, pour over ice, and top with club soda and a lemon wheel.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Welcome all to Season 2! This week: Eric goes and does more things in more places where he doesn't belong, Simon is getting a new room even though the void one is still empty, Ruthie has a tux fashion show, Matt gets really jealous of Heather's nerd friend, Mila Kunis still hasn't showed up despite constant teasing, Mary is mean, and the parents get married again for reasons that are literally never explained.


Drink We Forgot to Name:
2 oz Gin
3/4 oz Fresh Lime Juice
1/2 ox Luxardo

Shake and strain.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Season 1 is a wrap! Could it have been accomplished in one episode instead of two? Absolutely. But join us anyway as we take on the end of all the dangerous liaison plots - Annie keeps being terrible, Jimmy Moon starts being terrible, Wilson is still so pretty and good, Heather is too patient, and Grandpa is just along for the ride with a little solace from Mrs. Bink.

This week we're drinking a liquor mixed with a soda because it's been a long ride.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we reach the dramatic conclusion of Season 1 (well, part 1 of 2). The theme is "dangerous liaisons", and boy are they ever. We are introduced to several fan favorite recurring characters (Wilson, Heather, Ginger), and also extensively discuss the storied history of Mr. Potato Head, the etymology of the ASL word turtle, how our childhood closets were organized, and many other fun anecdotes leading up to 7th Heaven's most terrifying ending yet. 


The cocktail aka "Misc. Amaro Spritz":

2 oz of some Amaro (we used Amaro Lucano)
Seltzer Water
Squeeze of Fresh Lemon Juice

Serve on the rocks with a lemon twist and a castelvetrano olive. 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Boy do we have an episode for you, as Matt falls prey to the feminine wiles of Annie's old high school friend Rachel. We unpack this episode's "interesting" takes on gender dynamics, plus so many new facts about the famous invisible friend Hoowie. Also, Suzanne leaves town or something, but we aren't too sad to see her go.

This week we drank Open Gate Brewery's Guinness Blonde Ale. It has a great flag on the label. 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We decided not to subject any guests to this astonishingly terrible episode featuring the return of Aunt Julie, Grandma Ruth, and the Colonel. It has inexplicable backyard shipbuilding, the world's largest glass of port, and really just a lot of drama based on nearly nothing, but we do our best!

This week's cocktail:

Lemon Drop "Martini"

2 oz Vodka
1 oz Fresh Lemon Juice
1/2 oz Simple Syrup
1/2 oz Triple Sec
1/4 oz Limoncello

Shake and strain into a martini class.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We're back with friend of the show Lawrence to talk medical anxiety, convicts, and wayward phone dialing in an episode that feels like 3 rings of the same plot in a Groundhog's Day spiral. This week: Simon is the same annoying person, Ruthie prompts us to go on a long tangent about 90's lunch box classics, more meta jokes about Jimmy's acting ability or lack thereof, Mary hates boys and loves tools, and Eric continues to be the worst even when his moral convictions are in the right place.


Today we are drinking:

A big glass of Jameson and rocks (Lawrence)

Calvados Sour (Morgan and Greg):

2 oz Calvados
1 oz Fresh Lemon Juice
3/4 oz Simple Syrup (equal parts sugar and water dissolved)
1 Egg White
Angostura Bitters

Combine all of the ingredients in a shaker and shake hard. Then add ice and shake again. Double strain into a chilled coup using both a hawthorn and mesh strainer. Drop a few angostura bitters drops on top and swirl with a toothpick to make a fun design.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Friend of the show Lian is back to talk about one of the greatest episodes yet - the end of Season 1 is really on a roll! We are graced not only by the presence of bad girl Camille (played by the glorious Keri Russell), but hilarious runaway ferrets that travel in a pair of unfettered mischief. Plus a truly amazing final ten minutes, where the unpredictable secrets of former associate pastor Tom are revealed.


This week's drinks include:

Vodka mixed with Mountain Dew High Voltage (Greg)
Some French red blend (Morgan)
And a dignified Earl Grey hot toddy (Lian)

Note: Sorry about audio quality this week, I (Morgan) forgot to use a good mic like a moron. Just too excited about those ferrets.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

We sit down with some classic New Year's brunch drinks to talk about one well-crafted episode. It includes Ruthie's evolving liberation from Simon, Mary (and her hot high school Principal) teaching a supremely jerky man a lesson, the world's best "high crime area", and so much more.

This week's drinks:

Mimosa - you should just know what is in this.
Choose Your Own Bloody Mary - Morgan's recipe can include any of the following:

• Tomato juice, V8, Spicy V8, Clamato etc.
• 2 oz Vodka 
• A salty rim of Old Bay, za'taar, etc
• Lemons and Limes
• Pickled bits like olives, jalapeños, cocktail onions, cornichons etc. etc. etc.
• Cocktail shrimp if you've got them
• Some umami element like worcestershire sauce, fish sauce, garlic powder, garlicy hot sauce etc etc.
• Some way to introduce salt to the drink, like brine from the pickled bits
• Something spicy, good hot sauces to use are Cholula or Tapatio
• Fresh black pepper

Just stir it around and keep tasting it until it's balanced. 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we are here for a very special Christmas Eve Valentine's Day episode featuring Greg's mom Steph. The plot involves more logistical word problems, an ill-fated trip to the movies, a really stalker-y annual ex, the world's best track suit, and oh yeah Happy gets hit by a car but she's fine after a deep sleep.


Make your own Egg Nog! https://tastesbetterfromscratch.com/homemade-eggnog/ 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey gang, this week we are joined by our friend Lauren to talk about one of Season 1's more notable episodes - the introduction of the Colonel and Grandma Ruth! Plot points include The Clapper, small children hot wiring cars, an otherworldly hard pink taffy, so many trips to the hardware store, and the world's most stereotypical orphan.

By the way, here is the Gundam model we were talking about: https://www.amazon.com/Bandai-Hobby-Gundam-Master-Action/dp/B00030EVHU

This remote week (normal cocktail recipes will resume soon) we are festively drinking scotch, Mr. Boston Egg Nog, and Apothic Brew, which is a red blend mixed with cold brew? 

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we are joined by our friend Lian and her cat Juju to talk about a good old hazing plot. Sprinkled throughout are some questionable attitudes about patriotism, our criminal justice system, and peer pressure. We meet some new Glen Oak characters this go around, including the world's most legitimately grumpy diner owner and a real sassafras of a judge. Plus, Eric at his most irrational yet!


This week's cocktail:

The Rob Roy (also port for Greg, an Aunt Julie fav)
 
2 oz Scotch
1 oz Sweet Vermouth
Dash of Bitters
Stir and Garnish with a cherry

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Hey, hey, hey this week we are joined by Greg's brother-in-law Jackson to talk about an episode chock full of god incarnate - the glorious Mrs. Bink. However, she is quickly displaced by the holiest handyman - Steve. Also it's Lucy's 13th birthday and we are schooled by Jackson's deep knowledge of 7th Heaven space-time kinks. The new odd ball character Dwight is introduced and Happy finally has her puppies (we aren't entirely sure they are hers, though).

The cocktail this week is red wine and white russians again because we are all out of sorts.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week Morgan and Greg sit down to discuss an episode about Matt's new girlfriend trying to steal his family via very intense carpool word problems. Meanwhile, Mary hates the concept of cheerleading, Simon is the most annoying he has literally ever been after reading Goosebumps #6, and nineties flip phones are featured in a starring role.

Corrections: Morgan incorrectly attributes the music playing during Lucy's cheerleading training to Survivor when it is in fact the theme from Rocky. Please forgive us.

This week's cocktail:

Satan's Whiskers

1/2 oz. Gin
1/2 oz. Triple Sec
1/2 oz. Sweet Vermouth
1/2 oz. Dry Vermouth
1/2 oz. Orange Juice
Dash orange bitters

Shake and strain into a coupe.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week Stacey Axler (@StaceyAxComedy) is back to discuss one of our very favorite episodes! It really has it all: physically assaulting Simon, dog sweaters, Thanksgiving, Jimmy Moon's greatest appearance to date, Eric straight up imprisoning his sister, and much much more. 

The cocktail is something I made up with available stuff in my house, and named after Wesley Crusher:

The Ensign Energizer
2 oz Reposado Tequila (we prefer Cazadores)
1 oz Triple Sec
Splash of Orange Juice, Club Soda, and Lime

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

With ideal timing, we are joined by friend of the show Stephen to discuss a plot about trauma, communicable diseases, and a grueling election. Unrelated, Mary really wants a girls basketball team tattoo of a cat (no comment). Also, we learn that 90's playgrounds in France were more interested 7th Heaven than we could have possibly imagined. 


White Russian:
2 oz Vodka
1 oz Kahlua
Splash of cream

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we're joined by Morgan's college friend Kendal to talk mostly about Eric's infidelity rumors and Simon's terrible pick up game (huffing girls' hair). Plus, Mary's back at it again with another "boyfriend" Matt can't stand, who is really just a worse Jordan Catalano. Tuna casseroles, and casseroles in general as a cultural object, are discussed at length. 

French feminist book we mentioned Greg read as part of his quarantine rituals: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/7624359-king-kong-theory?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=ilOZ7V104O&rank=1 

This week's cocktail:
Tuxedo No. 2 (For Greg's tuxedo cat Dany)
This is close to the version served at NYC's Flora Bar, subbing absinthe for pastis

2 1/4 ounces gin (London dry, such as Plymouth or Beefeater)
1/2 ounce dry vermouth (we always use Dolin)
1/4 ounce Luxardo
4 dashes Regan's Orange Bitters
Ricard, to rinse

Garnish: orange twist, cherry

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we are joined by Greg's roommate Caitlin to discuss an episode focused on the unending dangers of marijuana, teenage basketball bitches, Lucy's attempts to win the favor of middle school Mila Kunis, one exceptionally strange dad (somehow not Eric), and hunting mailmen for sport. We also peer into a 1996 grocery store specializing in SnackWell products and cheap timepieces, to the delight of all.

The classic 90s's board game discussed in this episode was "Dream Phone": https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/dream-phone-childhood-games  

The Gilded Room
1.5 oz Brandy
1.5 oz Dry Vermouth
.5 oz Orange Curacao

Stir with ice and strain into a chilled coupe or martini glass.  

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Your hosts are joined by friend of the show Lawrence Kao to analyze a very spooky Halloween special. Eric's childhood "trauma" of beating up some other kid over nothing reaches a stunning conclusion, while many costumed looks are served at the church's Halloween fair. We also discuss the peculiar autumnal behavior of Southern Californians and the episode's many notable Z list guest stars.

This week's cocktail:

The Sidecar

• 1 1/2 ounce cognac (we used Pierre Ferrand 1840)
• 3/4 ounce orange liqueur (we used some terrible $5 triple sec, but cointreau would be better)
• 3/4 ounce lemon juice, freshly squeezed

Shake ingredients and pour into a chilled coupe. Garnish with a lemon or orange twist and a sugar rim.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

This week we sit down to discuss one of 7th Heaven's most infamous episodes, as the show confronts racism for the first time. To be honest, there's not much to joke about because the episode is outright terrible. We explore what exactly went wrong, if these types of mistakes are still a mainstay of American television, and the necessity of including minority voices in writing rooms.

The essay by Tahirah Hairston we mentioned at the top of the show: These very special '7th Heaven' episodes about black people are cringey as hell

This week's cocktail:

The Clermont
2 oz Old Grand-Dad Bonded Bourbon
1/4 oz Fernet
1/4 oz Simple Syrup
2 Dashs Angostura Bitters

Build in glass, stir, and serve on the rocks with an orange twist.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Your hosts are joined by Greg's friend and ex-roommate Taylor to discuss a funeral-focused episode following the death of Annie's mother. Everyone in town is invited to the Camdens' house for one hell of a wake, which unexpectedly leads to nonsensical comedic bits about the pitfalls of bigamy. Meanwhile, we uncover some interesting details about Ruthie's former lives as Simon continues to pursue basic bitch theology questions at every possible turn. Mary and Jeff finally break up and then fuck with Matt extensively.

This week's cocktail:

Gordon's Breakfast (credit to the late great Sasha Petraske)

2 oz dry London gin (your hosts prefer Beefeater or Plymouth)
6 lime wedges
¾ oz simple syrup
3 thin cucumber slices
4 dashes of Cholula hot sauce
2 dashes of Worcestershire sauce
Salt and Pepper

Shake all ingredients with ice and serve unstrained like a Pimm's cup.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Your hosts Greg and Morgan are joined by comedian and Annie Camden apologist Stacey Axler (@StaceyAxComedy) to discuss an action-packed Episode 3. This one has it all - tarmac dining, singalongs, malicious casserole, Simon's continued forays into bad theology, and a truly dramatic conclusion. Plus, we dive deep into several 90's relics, including the use of breath spray as a comedic device and the oft-forgotten choose your own adventure Goosebumps books. 

This week's cocktail recipe is dangerous!

The Red Baron (Aviation)

2 oz Gin
1/2 oz Luxardo
1/2 oz Fresh Lemon Juice
Cherry Garnish

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

In an era long before online "binge watching" necessitated narrative "momentum" the second episode of 7th Heaven was born. It's almost entirely about Happy the dog eating shoes. Also, your hosts Greg and Morgan address the validity of lemonade stand hustles and staying out all night in Times Square. Plus, Mary is still gay and the most famous lesbian google doc ever created proves it. This week we drank:

The Cousteau
2oz Dark Aged Rum
6oz REAL GINGER BEER
Garnish with a single cherry that is hard to fish out from under the ice

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp

Your brave hosts sit down for the very first time to mull over the action-packed pilot episode of the cult 90's WB television program 7th Heaven. What makes the show culturally timeless, why is it so great to hate, how many times will Lucy run out of the frame? These questions and more are answered over a made up cocktail:

The Martinique
2 oz White Rum (Brugal or Flor de Cana 4 yr recommended)
1 oz St. Germain
1/2 oz Fresh Lime Juice
Fresh Mint Leaves

Shake all of the ingredients with ice, strain, and serve in a martini glass or coupe.

Check us out on Discord: https://discord.gg/5JVVYpPPcp